Seekers' Lounge
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holidays-6

Sbarro

Originally aired: December 15, 2021

A few dads have lunch together at Sbarro.

0:01:25 Unknown Speaker #1

Twas the weeks before Christmas and all across the city, People flock to the malls for gifts that are pretty. From food courts dispensers to kioskalore, the malls where kind shoppers find their favorite store. When shopping with family, the children all howl the spouse needs attention, their stomach does growl. The days all seem endless one thousand tomorrow's. Dad's one place of solace, his favorite. Subboros. Wow. What a slice.

0:01:53 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, yeah.

0:01:55 Unknown Speaker #1

What? You know, these things keep getting bigger and bigger, it feels like, kinda.

0:02:00 Unknown Speaker #3

They do. It feels like a quarter of a peach here. What a deal.

0:02:03 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, am I the only one that got the zedie?

0:02:06 Unknown Speaker #3

I see I saw you walking over with that foil can't surprisingly delicious.

0:02:12 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. It'll foil

0:02:13 Unknown Speaker #5

plate. Is CD made to order or is it

0:02:16 Unknown Speaker #4

well, it's scooped to order.

0:02:18 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Yeah. It's good. That's good. I prefer Zidi where the cheese has been sitting on the noodle for a while under a heat lamp.

0:02:24 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, the whole point

0:02:24 Unknown Speaker #3

is that it's been baked. Subar has never been better. Yes. Never been better.

0:02:30 Unknown Speaker #1

Market pressure. You guys know. I've always said that. You know, you put pressure on the market. I think it's all the other sort of mall pizza businesses that have opened up here that have sort of force borrow to up its Yeah.

0:02:40 Unknown Speaker #3

I mean, ever since you started investing in the market, you've been very aware of how it affects chain.

0:02:47 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, you know a lot of people when they when when I told everybody I was going all in on Subaro. They were like, it feels like that's a forgotten business. Feels like the idea of a mall in general is sort of a forgotten business. And I said,

0:03:00 Unknown Speaker #4

tough to see much expansion.

0:03:02 Unknown Speaker #1

Exactly. But you know what?

0:03:03 Unknown Speaker #3

Food court's never going out of style. That's what you said.

0:03:05 Unknown Speaker #1

Absolutely not. And I get it. This one, obviously, is it has a few empty -- Yeah. This one is. -- empty sort of pusks. But I'm telling you this SPARO has never been better. And I am not worried. I am going to make a huge return on the seventy five k I put in SPARO.

0:03:20 Unknown Speaker #3

What the year look like for Sbarro? Have they had more stores? Do they have less? What number are they up to?

0:03:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, they are saying that the sort of store store count is shrinking, but quality of store is increasing. And these are all That

0:03:37 Unknown Speaker #3

was in the Subaro announcements -- Yeah.

0:03:39 Unknown Speaker #1

which you follow. I'm on their I'm on their investor calls.

0:03:39 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:03:43 Unknown Speaker #5

Right.

0:03:44 Unknown Speaker #1

I get their monthly sort of There was a big

0:03:46 Unknown Speaker #3

garlic knot announcement this week.

0:03:48 Unknown Speaker #1

They was. They said they said we can no longer afford to produce garlic knots.

0:03:52 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, that's not what I thought.

0:03:54 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, they're not selling. I mean, they look selling.

0:03:56 Unknown Speaker #5

You don't

0:03:56 Unknown Speaker #3

i mean, come down.

0:03:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Great but they don't sell much. But I look at that as not at the we're not downsizing. We're

0:04:01 Unknown Speaker #1

refocusing all of our energy

0:04:01 Unknown Speaker #4

sort of

0:04:04 Unknown Speaker #1

the the piece they resist on. The pizza, they resist on

0:04:04 Unknown Speaker #2

on -- efficiency. --

0:04:08 Unknown Speaker #5

so you don't need a nod if you have a pizza. It's the same thing but without the cheese and the tomato sauce.

0:04:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Exactly. I

0:04:14 Unknown Speaker #4

liked your rhyme. I heard your rhyme.

0:04:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Are you

0:04:16 Unknown Speaker #4

still doing the poetry?

0:04:17 Unknown Speaker #5

Everyday. Every day, I wake up in the morning, I brew myself a pot of coffee. And I write some poetry on whatever I'm inspired to do. Wow. Rimes, things like that. Yeah.

0:04:28 Unknown Speaker #3

That's weird. You write about rhymes? Yes. My poems are Not only do they rhyme, but they're about rhyme.

0:04:36 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, you've simply fallen in love with rhyme.

0:04:38 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, then once you started morning was a a b b, and then it said

0:04:45 Unknown Speaker #5

why don't you talk to me me? Me cover me. Right. Right.

0:04:50 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Poetry about rhyme.

0:04:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. So in that so that one is all me having a conversation with the rhymes. Right.

0:04:56 Unknown Speaker #3

So now

0:04:56 Unknown Speaker #5

why Right. ABB. Why don't you talk to me me?

0:04:59 Unknown Speaker #5

I am Bicma pentameter. Why don't you come over her?

0:04:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Right.

0:05:03 Unknown Speaker #4

I don't even know how you have the energy for this stuff. I mean you're doing keep you safe way to eat versus

0:05:08 Unknown Speaker #3

of a pot.

0:05:09 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. That's true.

0:05:10 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. That's that's how I get the energy. I don't it's tough to sleep with the newborn. Yeah. Honestly and I I don't know if we've discussed this and I but do not go to Dr. Feldman for vasectomies because

0:05:26 Unknown Speaker #3

really?

0:05:26 Unknown Speaker #5

He talked

0:05:27 Unknown Speaker #4

me into

0:05:27 Unknown Speaker #3

i have an appointment next month

0:05:29 Unknown Speaker #5

for my V. Cancel it.

0:05:30 Unknown Speaker #3

What happened?

0:05:31 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, I got a newborn. So

0:05:34 Unknown Speaker #4

well, God knows we all want vasectomies. Oh my god.

0:05:37 Unknown Speaker #1

I actually you know, I I I told you this before you went, I told you this before you went to Feldman, and I said, last I heard, the last vasectomy he did. He didn't tie the tubes. He shortened the tubes. So the little sperm's got less

0:05:49 Unknown Speaker #4

more positions.

0:05:50 Unknown Speaker #3

To swim. They're more they they've they've they're less tired.

0:05:54 Unknown Speaker #4

Your first is probably shooting out of your weiner like a gosh dang cannon.

0:05:57 Unknown Speaker #5

That's what I

0:05:58 Unknown Speaker #3

told you right now. The shortest tubes. You've got the shortest tubes in history?

0:06:02 Unknown Speaker #5

Historically, I have the shortest tubes in there.

0:06:04 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, you already had pretty short tubes too to, you know, anatomical.

0:06:10 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. You have a short tube.

0:06:11 Unknown Speaker #5

So yes. But my tube was born I was born naturally short tubes. So they were already I mean, I have five kids.

0:06:18 Unknown Speaker #3

These Normalize short tubes.

0:06:20 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Please. Hopefully.

0:06:21 Unknown Speaker #4

The shorter the tube, the larger the harder the shot.

0:06:24 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right. I mean, they're going straight in. It's just physics.

0:06:28 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. There's less drag.

0:06:29 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. And so he kept He kept external the same length. Thank God, but he shortened the two even more. And because he said it was too short to tie.

0:06:39 Unknown Speaker #4

Why I heard that sometimes on some of the more difficult internal tube ties, they'll just tie the whole thing.

0:06:46 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Well, we he showed me that there's an external bow.

0:06:49 Unknown Speaker #5

He showed me the AT and T's as an option. And I I considered it. But at the end of the day, I thought it would look really weird.

0:06:57 Unknown Speaker #3

And occasionally, he'll get the side of scissors, and run it along, and it'll curl

0:07:03 Unknown Speaker #1

up quick. You'd like

0:07:07 Unknown Speaker #4

to spell them? Yeah. I'm not gonna spell them.

0:07:09 Unknown Speaker #3

It's great. And funny.

0:07:10 Unknown Speaker #3

have curly cute.

0:07:10 Unknown Speaker #4

Where you

0:07:12 Unknown Speaker #4

No. I do not want one. No. I want my straight line.

0:07:15 Unknown Speaker #3

I'm just saying what he

0:07:16 Unknown Speaker #1

offers. Yeah.

0:07:17 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Well, I'll let you say, I love my son. I love it. Hey.

0:07:22 Unknown Speaker #3

He sees with your wife right now, they're out shopping.

0:07:24 Unknown Speaker #4

Just because you love what you got, doesn't mean you gotta want more of it.

0:07:27 Unknown Speaker #1

That's exactly right now. Let me tell you. You're not gonna love this kid once he's going to college because

0:07:34 Unknown Speaker #5

oh, yeah.

0:07:34 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:07:35 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:07:35 Unknown Speaker #1

boy, let me tell you when they're

0:07:36 Unknown Speaker #3

They come home with new ideas.

0:07:36 Unknown Speaker #5

a kid.

0:07:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, new ideas. They come home asking for the tuition check, and you're just like, listen. All the money's tied up right now. I'll do my best.

0:07:48 Unknown Speaker #3

So you didn't have a plan to pay for your sons.

0:07:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, I did. But it's a longer term plan than what it ended up

0:07:56 Unknown Speaker #5

i had totally expected when you said you don't want them you won't love him as much when they got to college that his personality changed but the issue is expensive.

0:08:03 Unknown Speaker #1

It's that very expensive.

0:08:04 Unknown Speaker #3

So they they hound him for the money

0:08:07 Unknown Speaker #2

-- Yeah. --

0:08:08 Unknown Speaker #3

in class?

0:08:09 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I told him to not put my name on any of the paperwork. So he's sort of going, and I'm sort of shadow shadow spending to

0:08:18 Unknown Speaker #3

and this is landlord University.

0:08:22 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. My son got

0:08:22 Unknown Speaker #5

What it's called?

0:08:24 Unknown Speaker #3

so they knocked

0:08:24 Unknown Speaker #1

on the door.

0:08:25 Unknown Speaker #5

Hey, congrats on him getting in.

0:08:27 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:08:27 Unknown Speaker #4

It's That's impact Yeah. Yeah.

0:08:29 Unknown Speaker #1

It's pretty great.

0:08:30 Unknown Speaker #3

It's cool.

0:08:30 Unknown Speaker #1

The wait list is apparently

0:08:32 Unknown Speaker #3

he got it in the early decision. Right?

0:08:34 Unknown Speaker #5

Who did he get for finding the cheapest dishwasher one zero one?

0:08:42 Unknown Speaker #4

because you because you went there. You're pretty familiar with most of

0:08:42 Unknown Speaker #1

You gotta

0:08:45 Unknown Speaker #5

the Yeah.

0:08:46 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Well And there's is there still fluorescent lighting throughout the college there?

0:08:50 Unknown Speaker #1

There is.

0:08:51 Unknown Speaker #5

There

0:08:51 Unknown Speaker #1

is. And and and the funny, the craziest thing is every fixture in the whole place. You can't find a bulb to to replace if they go out because it was the cheapest thing. The bulbs come from a different country or something. Yeah. They don't have the right inputs.

0:09:04 Unknown Speaker #5

That sounds about right.

0:09:06 Unknown Speaker #4

remember when you were in low flow four zero one.

0:09:06 Unknown Speaker #3

Now I

0:09:09 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. God,

0:09:10 Unknown Speaker #4

you almost didn't make it out

0:09:11 Unknown Speaker #5

of it. It's a tough class. It's so hard to find a, the low flow, shower heads, that flow, that low. And then b, the little, you know, the handles that can never get the temperature where you want.

0:09:24 Unknown Speaker #4

Right. Right.

0:09:25 Unknown Speaker #5

But, you know, that's that's why that's how the masters do.

0:09:28 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Now is he taking garage full of landlords junk eleven o one?

0:09:33 Unknown Speaker #5

Eleven or one.

0:09:34 Unknown Speaker #4

He's That's a very advanced

0:09:35 Unknown Speaker #1

he started it.

0:09:36 Unknown Speaker #4

For college.

0:09:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. He started it, but it was a little too tough, and he dropped it out for the first couple says a little too tough.

0:09:41 Unknown Speaker #5

Because you have to learn to be so rude for that one. You have to learn to

0:09:45 Unknown Speaker #1

know You know, my my son's a sweetie.

0:09:47 Unknown Speaker #4

I'll tell you what, this new watch, I'm loving Yeah. That's nice. I'm loving it.

0:09:50 Unknown Speaker #1

How's your a few times today, it sort of set off an alarm while we've been walking around the mall. Like, Is it like counting steps

0:09:58 Unknown Speaker #4

or Oh, I have a ton of alarms now. I have a ton of alarms because I never have to check my phone

0:10:04 Unknown Speaker #1

oh, nice.

0:10:04 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:10:04 Unknown Speaker #4

to get them off. So I'll do an alarm for go upstairs. I'll do an alarm for don't forget to eat in one hour. So you probably heard this tomorrow. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

0:10:14 Unknown Speaker #1

It was about an hour ago. That's awesome. Yeah.

0:10:16 Unknown Speaker #4

It was awesome.

0:10:17 Unknown Speaker #1

Do you ever find it's tough to have your family just so close? Like, it feels like on your watch, you can't get away from it.

0:10:24 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, it's boundaries. You gotta you gotta say, hey, I answer the text when I'm ready.

0:10:27 Unknown Speaker #3

We've been together most of the day working on our little side hustle.

0:10:32 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. How and how is that? So you get chargers from warehouses and then you resell them on Amazon, phone charges.

0:10:40 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. We get the little charts. Cheat ones.

0:10:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Cheat. They're seventy five cents a piece.

0:10:44 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. And

0:10:45 Unknown Speaker #3

we and we I mean, that's an expensive one. That's the one that you plug in and it lights up the lights in your van

0:10:51 Unknown Speaker #1

when the beats play.

0:10:51 Unknown Speaker #5

yeah.

0:10:51 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:10:52 Unknown Speaker #5

That seems not necessary for almost everyone on earth. Yeah. Yeah.

0:10:56 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, we sell a beat fucking idiots for twelve ninety nine.

0:10:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. And that's at the lowest. That's at the lowest.

0:11:02 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. How many do you sell a week? Depends

0:11:05 Unknown Speaker #4

could be ten, could be thousand.

0:11:05 Unknown Speaker #3

you know

0:11:07 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. I mean, we try to go to people where we we go to where, you know, people really need their charger, and they've left it, and we jack the price.

0:11:17 Unknown Speaker #4

Airports -- Airports. -- places. We wholesale. We scour the city for just cheap merch.

0:11:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. It's it's called inside the airport law. You can you can profile people based on their desperation

0:11:31 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:11:31 Unknown Speaker #5

yeah.

0:11:32 Unknown Speaker #3

and then just charge them I mean, we charge Gouging

0:11:32 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:11:34 Unknown Speaker #1

price scalps.

0:11:35 Unknown Speaker #4

As soon as I see someone hurriedly feeling the pockets of their bag, I know. It's a sales order.

0:11:40 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We charge

0:11:41 Unknown Speaker #1

someone in on

0:11:41 Unknown Speaker #3

this thousand dollars for a charger Where were they? Where were they?

0:11:47 Unknown Speaker #4

This was Dallas Fort Worth, I think.

0:11:49 Unknown Speaker #1

They're you I feel like you've told me this story. They were they were in the midst of a of a catastrophic natural disaster, and their phone was dead, and they were being crushed by

0:12:02 Unknown Speaker #3

a a landslide. Yeah. It was a landslide.

0:12:05 Unknown Speaker #3

So we skate down landslides on skimmerbush. We

0:12:05 Unknown Speaker #5

Wow.

0:12:12 Unknown Speaker #4

it's actually really sick.

0:12:14 Unknown Speaker #3

It's awesome. People take pictures of us and post them in the little coffee table

0:12:18 Unknown Speaker #3

seen us on Skinboard weekly? Yeah. He says. Yeah.

0:12:18 Unknown Speaker #4

have you

0:12:20 Unknown Speaker #5

I don't We get bored weekly.

0:12:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, my god.

0:12:23 Unknown Speaker #5

list of antennas. For a weekly magazine.

0:12:23 Unknown Speaker #4

There's a

0:12:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Enough time to Yeah. It's the thinnest paper. You can throw it down while you're running and slide all the way home.

0:12:31 Unknown Speaker #5

So Skimboard magazine is

0:12:32 Unknown Speaker #1

itself a Skimboard.

0:12:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes.

0:12:34 Unknown Speaker #3

And it is a paper, not a magazine.

0:12:34 Unknown Speaker #5

That's awesome.

0:12:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. So Man, man.

0:12:38 Unknown Speaker #3

But, yeah, we

0:12:39 Unknown Speaker #4

at the Subaro, Come over whenever you're done at Charlotte Ruth.

0:12:44 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Bria, bring the girls over. I haven't seen them in a while.

0:12:47 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I'm sorry. I think they're just they're getting out of hand, so I gotta corral them over.

0:12:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. You guys ever I I have

0:12:53 Unknown Speaker #5

to you. Heaven daughters, you know.

0:12:55 Unknown Speaker #4

It's that daddy daughter love there's nothing like it.

0:12:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. You've got a house full of boys

0:12:59 Unknown Speaker #3

and your house is is it's smoking.

0:13:03 Unknown Speaker #1

It's not possible.

0:13:04 Unknown Speaker #3

It's rumbling at all.

0:13:05 Unknown Speaker #4

There's always ember.

0:13:06 Unknown Speaker #5

They say nature versus nurture, but I think boys just are crazy. I think there's nothing you you could do about it. Certainly, nothing I can do about it.

0:13:12 Unknown Speaker #3

I see you guys out in the yard sometimes in a tent, you and your wife just trying to get some shut eye

0:13:17 Unknown Speaker #5

yeah well it's the only way we can catch forty winks because inside the house it is you got Fortnite in one room You got I I mean Michael is doing TikTok indoor skateboarding.

0:13:29 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh my gosh.

0:13:30 Unknown Speaker #5

Sam just discovered Ben Margera, so I'm red all

0:13:33 Unknown Speaker #4

over. Sucks.

0:13:35 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, yeah. He's spaking you on the toilet all the time.

0:13:37 Unknown Speaker #5

Jack, I can't get a free moment. My wife is crying all day.

0:13:41 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, at least they're creative. Lisa are

0:13:44 Unknown Speaker #5

very good. I just want them to use it for something a little more you know I mean Sean is a science genius And the only thing he does is little rockets on the backs of my shoes that I don't know about until I walk out the door.

0:13:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh my god. I'm just getting a notice from Bloomberg saying that Sabar is introducing Bruschetta? No way. Canning the garlic roast yeah.

0:14:08 Unknown Speaker #4

You better get out now, my man.

0:14:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Hang on.

0:14:11 Unknown Speaker #3

That's a tough thing. He better get out now. A shillingate, a tomato mixture.

0:14:16 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh my god. Down into the right.

0:14:19 Unknown Speaker #1

No. No.

0:14:20 Unknown Speaker #3

Down into the right, much like, your penis after My

0:14:24 Unknown Speaker #5

little penis. Yeah. My little tube.

0:14:26 Unknown Speaker #3

After your beset.

0:14:28 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, hey, fellas. I really appreciate we can all carve out this time when we're all shopping at the mall Yeah.

0:14:33 Unknown Speaker #3

This is nice when we all see each other here at the

0:14:36 Unknown Speaker #5

it's so important. Well, by you know, I I don't know. We were gonna do the I fly later, but with the Subhash news, could you still afford it?

0:14:43 Unknown Speaker #1

It's looking like it's it's sort of tanking through in my my brother.

0:14:46 Unknown Speaker #3

Come on. Get in the outdoor skydiving with us and let it blow your eyelids.

0:14:50 Unknown Speaker #4

And you gotta buy the damon.

0:14:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Buy the dip buy the dip. It's pretty dope.

0:14:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Why to do it.

0:14:56 Unknown Speaker #4

What else do they have

0:14:57 Unknown Speaker #3

on the docket? Other than brachetta. Is that only announcement? I just give them the headline.

0:15:01 Unknown Speaker #1

They're gonna start selling napkin's outfit for

0:15:04 Unknown Speaker #4

okay. Okay. Well, that's napkins.

0:15:08 Unknown Speaker #3

They They're selling napkins. They're out there

0:15:11 Unknown Speaker #4

at an all time Greece high.

0:15:13 Unknown Speaker #3

Hold on. Gree oh, more grease? More sitting in Greece? On this on the pep

0:15:19 Unknown Speaker #5

what city? Oh, I'm sitting here. Fresh parada. They're trying fresh parada as a sign in an appetizer. Oh, my god.

0:15:26 Unknown Speaker #4

So You gotta sell yesterday.

0:15:28 Unknown Speaker #1

I I wish I could, but my broker's out of town.

0:15:31 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, my

0:15:32 Unknown Speaker #5

god. He travels too much. Yeah. She's gotta keep his phone off.

0:15:36 Unknown Speaker #3

He out all last week. He's been

0:15:38 Unknown Speaker #1

out actually since January. It sucks.

0:15:40 Unknown Speaker #4

Just going up for Scott.

0:15:42 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. I know it's you know?

0:15:44 Unknown Speaker #5

I said to get a new broker. I think your broker has broke in.

0:15:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, you know, I wish that I had read the contract before I signed it. I didn't know you had to.

0:15:51 Unknown Speaker #4

Lifetime? Yeah.

0:15:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Lifetime

0:15:53 Unknown Speaker #5

that sucks I've signed a few of those.

0:15:55 Unknown Speaker #1

It really sucks.

0:15:56 Unknown Speaker #5

Well I I tell you I am so sorry that's a lot of money you just lost too or

0:16:00 Unknown Speaker #1

oh, it's alright. My son's gonna make it back when he becomes a landlord. I'm just

0:16:03 Unknown Speaker #5

that's tough.

0:16:03 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:16:04 Unknown Speaker #3

starts Lucky. We're trying Lucky.

0:16:04 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:16:07 Unknown Speaker #5

I felt yeah. I just couldn't get that last credit for having a friend who can do everything. And doesn't do anything right now.

0:16:19 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, it's hard. My guy, there's no uniform will show up.

0:16:23 Unknown Speaker #4

This quote Philip's coming

0:16:24 Unknown Speaker #5

over and he he doesn't know how to text.

0:16:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, the last test yeah. The last test on looking looking just weird enough that the tenant is afraid to open the door when you knock. It's it's I passed

0:16:37 Unknown Speaker #5

that with fine color.

0:16:39 Unknown Speaker #3

I took fixing your fridge Friday at nine PM, two zero one, and I flunked.

0:16:46 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, that's

0:16:47 Unknown Speaker #5

tough. Well, because you always wanna do something Friday, and I it's hard for you to be free.

0:16:51 Unknown Speaker #3

But I have to stay there because the fridge.

0:16:54 Unknown Speaker #4

My How'd you do with lying to your tenants

0:16:56 Unknown Speaker #5

to be aware?

0:16:58 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, that one I could I didn't just sign up for. My son my son showed me showed me a report that he did on ignoring a termite diagnosis Oh. And oh, diagnosis. I was I was four.

0:17:10 Unknown Speaker #3

You got diagnosed with that, right,

0:17:12 Unknown Speaker #5

at the doctor's office. Doctor fulfillment.

0:17:14 Unknown Speaker #3

You're the first you need to get Right?

0:17:16 Unknown Speaker #4

You said doctor Philbin. Right?

0:17:19 Unknown Speaker #3

Regus diagnosed you with termites?

0:17:22 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, and I said Regus, I'd love to ask the audience. I'm Yeah.

0:17:26 Unknown Speaker #1

And you did.

0:17:27 Unknown Speaker #3

I did. And it's Well, you phoned me, and I was like, make sense to me. Your whole your legs are full of holes.

0:17:33 Unknown Speaker #5

First, you typed one letter at the time at at a time into your computer. I was like, I only have thirty seconds for this photo and then you're like, I got it on Google it. Yeah. But yeah. I got termites.

0:17:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:17:44 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, all my problems will be solved once the sun gets out of school. So it'll next Christmas maybe Here

0:17:50 Unknown Speaker #5

comes the son out of school.

0:17:53 Unknown Speaker #4

That's not a rhyme, but it's artistic.

0:17:56 Unknown Speaker #5

It's artistic. I'm very inspired by some of the old artists.

0:17:58 Unknown Speaker #4

That's cool. Yeah.

0:17:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. That. That's really cool. Yeah. Now What you call the Beatles. Right? Old artist?

0:18:04 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. I thought those guys are the oldest artists.

0:18:06 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, shit.

0:18:07 Unknown Speaker #3

Look at that lady. She's digging around in her purse. Excuse me.

0:18:10 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, hey.

0:18:11 Unknown Speaker #3

Excuse me. Is your phone

0:18:13 Unknown Speaker #3

Your phone dead? Well, we happen to have a UCBC right here for forty thousand.

0:18:13 Unknown Speaker #5

dead, ma'am?

0:18:20 Unknown Speaker #4

No. For

0:18:20 Unknown Speaker #3

that Jan. Yes. Jan.

0:18:25 Unknown Speaker #4

fifty dollars.

0:18:25 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:18:25 Unknown Speaker #1

Or -- Now

0:18:28 Unknown Speaker #3

Get out of here. I go.

0:18:30 Unknown Speaker #4

You gotta let everyone else know you're serious. They just saw that. We don't wait around.

0:18:35 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right. That's good.

0:18:36 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We did a classic barter. Yeah. And then we shoot You

0:18:43 Unknown Speaker #1

say a number, let them assume that it's American. So if they say yes, you make forty. Exactly. If they are shocked, she

0:18:49 Unknown Speaker #4

said, yeah. We're not crazy.

0:18:52 Unknown Speaker #1

And then when they say no, you say, shit. Yeah.

0:18:56 Unknown Speaker #3

It was a classic negotiation.

0:18:58 Unknown Speaker #4

This was all YouTube tutorials.

0:19:00 Unknown Speaker #3

You guys have seen me at the auction.

0:19:02 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm. Mhmm. Well, the video went viral.

0:19:05 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh my god.

0:19:06 Unknown Speaker #4

That was the that was the auction that actually sold the least amount of things.

0:19:11 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. I was at CEMA. I was at CEMA.

0:19:14 Unknown Speaker #4

CEMA a big car auction.

0:19:15 Unknown Speaker #3

Exactly. Yes. And I I I was bitten on a z twenty eight. Wow. I raised up, I said, forty thousand.

0:19:26 Unknown Speaker #5

Wait a job. Wait a job. You said, well, yeah.

0:19:29 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, yeah.

0:19:30 Unknown Speaker #5

It's sold right away.

0:19:32 Unknown Speaker #3

They didn't give us a going once twice three times.

0:19:35 Unknown Speaker #5

Forty thousand sold, then you know it was gonna be you. Was so mad. Yeah.

0:19:38 Unknown Speaker #3

And it's too late to say, yen. So I got that bad ass car, but I did have to get a I had to Unfortunately, move out of my place. Yeah. But luckily, my landlord helped me.

0:19:50 Unknown Speaker #5

That's very nice.

0:19:51 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, you didn't have to move out of your I mean, your wife kicked you out.

0:19:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Right? Well, after I quickly bought the z twenty one eight, my wife kicked me out and started dating the landlord.

0:20:01 Unknown Speaker #5

Oh, that's -- Wow.

0:20:02 Unknown Speaker #4

tale as old as Tom.

0:20:02 Unknown Speaker #2

--

0:20:06 Unknown Speaker #5

Who amongst us?

0:20:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Can I see a show of hands here in the food court of dads waiting for their wife shopping of who whose wife broke the landlord? See you.

0:20:22 Unknown Speaker #4

I think that's every man in the food

0:20:23 Unknown Speaker #3

court. Wow.

0:20:27 Unknown Speaker #5

I fly. Four thirty two. Your fly is up.

0:20:31 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, that's us. That's us.

0:20:33 Unknown Speaker #5

Go ahead and drink a lot of water because you're about to be dried the fuck out.

0:20:38 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, we actually got the reverse I fly that sucked to the floor.

0:20:41 Unknown Speaker #3

all get that? It's true. I didn't

0:20:41 Unknown Speaker #5

Did you

0:20:43 Unknown Speaker #5

know they did that anymore.

0:20:44 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. They're you know how they'll turn the the coasters around backwards? They're sucking people to the floor.

0:20:58 Unknown Speaker #1

I don't know if I wanna get in there, guys. These people are trapped in my class.

0:21:08 Unknown Speaker #5

Will that fly?

0:21:09 Unknown Speaker #1

No. We can't do this.

0:21:12 Unknown Speaker #4

I think I'm gonna get another zedie.

0:21:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Alright. Hi, sir. Would you like

0:21:18 Unknown Speaker #4

let me get another let me get a zedie.

0:21:21 Unknown Speaker #5

Sorry we're out of business actually. What? What?