We record the season finale live from the Subtle Shores Rocket Launch Zone, specifically inside the cockpit.
Welcome to last resort, the podcast where Bill air jetsetters, eat prey lovers in a family of five. Just looking for a nice getaway, can tune in to get the inside scoop. On the goings on, of the Who gives a shit about the rank because we're launching a spaceship, best off beach, Gulf Coast vacation spot in the beautiful USFA subtle shores, resort, buffet, offshore casino, underwater cemetery, and
now Bring them home.
Officially, a rocket launch pad. That's right, folks.
Maybe. Yes.
Hi. Of course, Sam. Scott Skip. Powell, one of your four hosts of the show last resort here with my cohorts and co conspirators.
That's right. That's my brother, and I'm his. My name is Sydney Powell, and I am the space captain. That's right. I've been officially given a plastic badge to fly to space.
Congratulations. And you got a lanyard. Congratulations.
Oh, the lanyard is long, baby. The lanyard is so long I have to wrap it twice.
And even still, it's it's kind of in tail mode at that point. Yeah.
I'm getting yeah. I snag it on some stuff occasionally. As I've been walking around the cockpit, I keep getting the lanyard snagged on switches, which as we all know was part of what happened earlier this week. But
yes. But
but hey, we're ready. We're ready.
We don't need to address yet. I mean people might know, might rid of the news. It's mayor Dwayne Croonan Neumann over here.
Dwayne's been forgetting some of his crudes recently. He gets started with something, but he's not sure what he meant to say.
He got very inspired by Garth Brooks' amazing grace.
At the inauguration and I
at the inauguration.
Everybody, you know, I I put out a video of my own and I said, I don't care if you're in the room with me or at home. Singalov. To the song. I'm packed in. I'm holding. She's smiling. She live in. She golden. She lives for me, says she lives for me, bitch, and everybody at home, her own motivation. She
goes around that.
She goes down on me.
Yeah. No. Me.
You think you smile. Look at to this part, but I know all the rest. The chorus. Baby. Baby. No. That words.
We don't know the part that everybody else apparently knows.
So they took they locked me up and they put me they put they threw away the key when I did that because people thought I was losing my mind. Turns out I had just taken a few too many Ambient that night and
few took few too many.
Okay. I took the city's supply of Ambion that night by accident. By accident.
The city only gets a certain amount.
Every six weeks.
Say by accident, but you did break into a pharmacy.
Yeah. I yes.
You kept saying you were looking for kosher salt.
I was looking for kosher salt. That's for how it works. I have four, kinda, four sea salt. Zero kosher salt to the house. I had a recipe that called for kosher salt. So
it's very close, Dwayne.
What is? Salt to Salt. Well, no. But I was serving Jewish people, and so I wanted to make sure the Salt is kosher. Unfortunately, I served a bunch of Jews and myself a lot of ambiance.
Pick him a
lay in.
What's that? Pick pick him a lay in an ambien. Crusted salmon.
There were so many sleeping rabbis at your house. I've never seen anything like it.
Yep. Yeah. It was But a
lot of people wanted the recipe. You said it was called sleepy salmon.
Yet the sleepy salmon. And so if people want those pizza, it's a very expensive dish and I don't want you to overdose on it. And make sure if you're serving rabbis that they don't have a service that night or God forbid g slash d. That one of them is a moil on their way to an appointment after the dinner if you understand my meaning.
Yeah. A couple of late night a late night circumcision really got botched.
Big bunch. But, yeah, Dwayne, Corinne Neumann, I'm the mayor of the town as you remember. And all is well. I'll say that.
Hello, everyone. Doctor GUI Nuj coming at you.
Keeping the same name.
Yeah. I just figured I'd stick to this one because there's no other words you could really make. I went down there I was, you know, messing around with a a what's that game? Scrabbel, Mhmm. I've got a scrabble of my name, and I was messing around. So I kept gooey nooj.
And, you know, I I believe that Scott Skip and and his son were at your place, and Dennis The lunatic rearranged all those little letters on your refrigerator that were you were using for names. And it threw you off. You know those letters, people write poems and stuff.
Little magnetic letters. Yeah. Refrigerator magnetic letters. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm saying that that I let them run wild.
Yeah. He put a bunch of dirty sayings, and I was having pastor resting over for a dinner, and he put fuck hole on the freezer
--
class -- a classic saying.
It's a fuck hole.
It's one of our favorite sayings.
And now I and well, I'm sure we'll get to all four by the end of the episode, but since the last episode, each one of us had a religious figure over for dinner and done something offensive or negative, the effects of the religious figure.
And not only
four of story well.
Not only were were these, this was a dinner to plead that I be let back into the church. This wasn't, like, come over. This I was already on thin ice. This is a thin ice religious figure dinner.
You were the first person to get kicked out because of a confession. Right? Yes.
That's right. I My confession was so bad. I was in the booth, and he he said, get the fuck out of here. I said, that's too far.
You Wow.
You think yeah. He said fuck. Wow. And he said, I don't normally say that, but he's like, get the fuck Out of here. You think I'm gonna tell God about that? No way. And I got they have a f sixteen ejector seat. In the in the confessional, they bombed me straight up through landed in the the the dunk tank.
I mean, the baptismal bull Babism.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Well, not what you're talking about. Is is a a reused dunk tank from a carnival. Because the original pull had a crack in it.
Well, the pastor has a mean fastball. Mhmm. And he likes to show off, so he will pitch one down the middle and dunk whoever is getting baptized, obviously.
And my son never ended up getting baptized because they called in a lefty that day, and he was just He was not throwing singers, and he missed four in a row, walked by the sun.
Your son your son ended up in hell because of that.
That's right, sadly.
Walked right off the baptismal seat.
Yeah. Yeah. It was a walk it was a walk off hell run. And so you got right off the seat and trotted straight to hell.
That's a shame. Now, gooey nudge, you must have really had to do some some groveling to get back in the good grace. Is it true that you promised the pastor something Did you promise him a trip to heaven on this patient?
Yes. I had I got drunk off of some box wine. I was keeping in the pantry, just taking little nips off of it throughout the dinner. And I said, hey, listen. I've got I can get you to heaven, and I can get you there quick. And he bought it. He bought it. This guy's gullible. You know pastor rustin. He is gullible. Right. Absolutely.
the most gullible guys in town.
One of
Wait. That was his superlative, most gullible. And he bought it. So I have to get him in here.
He is a pretty shameless trick, I gotta say. And I love it. I mean, I think it's gonna be really cool to have him in the cockpit. It's definitely correct. But but I I think he's gonna be displeased when he's
just He's he's he's wearing the get up gonna be great for photos. He's gonna be in the whole pasture outfit. He's gonna Oh,
why was you gonna hit were they able to get the the leash large enough to go around the helmet. Not the leash or collar.
Collar. Call. Yeah. Yeah. No.
He he does have his leash too. He's having loose leash.
Well, because he Every pastor has a metaphorical leash from God. Yes.
And his yeah. He actually goes the extra mile. He has it's a spike sort of dog collar looking kinda thing. And he has a leash that runs
up into the up into the attic of the other
off the truck
shirt.
Yeah. He's Jesus' sub
that's yeah. It's part of the story of their church, of course.
Well, everybody know or not everybody knows that Jesus was a dom.
New New Testament, check it out. Yeah.
Why do you think he's getting so buff? He had to intimidate. He had to dominate.
Jesus was a dom in his final Switch over to sub was getting crucified.
Check the new testament. Check in to Settle Shores. It is in your bathrooms. It is in the bed. It is in the pillows. We've got the new new testament everywhere.
And there's a lot of The book of Quioteen, the book of of The book of amino acid? Of course. BCAs.
Oh, go ahead.
No. You go.
Oh, I was just gonna say the the book of oh, what's it called? Oh, Eugenics total t?
All you gotta do is text. So
so yeah.
At at that's just a few we might think of more throughout the episode, and we'll let you know if we do. Sure. Yeah.
If it comes up against We'll
let you know. We will let you know, folks.
Say, yeah, folks, we should probably explain to you why the the episode didn't didn't make it to air on Wednesday. Unfortunately, due to some pretty serious mechanical
and sort of
technological It wasn't just it was a lot of snafus and a lot of different sort of facets of the process. The launch on Wednesday was a they're calling it a a total loss.
Yeah. Was it the general
the the general got back to us on that?
Yeah. The general came and appraised the the situation.
General, by the way.
And just so everyone knows, the cartoon of the general was created by the general to be a better, more pleasant likeness than the actual general. The actual general is shorter, wider, meaner
--
must dash here.
--
rougher, rust mustache here.
Little less expressive in the face.
He is me. That that thing for a great low rate and to save some time, that's all. He says something to you in that cadence, but it's much crueler.
Yes. Yes. He'll come up to you and he'll eat you. Oh, you like eating food. Do you, man? Well, I tell you what? Try this ham and he'll slam it in your face. He will throw ham in your face. It always it it's not as stunted as when I did it, but He'll just throw out the problem.
He definitely nails the rhythm. He got the rhythm down.
He was really pissed because when he was meeting with us, it was for a huge insurance payout. I mean, we had a fat fat policy on that chip.
Yeah. And as you all know, you know, we are we added the launch zone. We lost some of our sponsors, but we had Arizona T and some others coming in to help us. Yeah. Turn several shores, not into just a resort and offshore casino run by pirates and resort filled with wolves. But also a spaceship the first of its kind to launch from a resort. We had sold that standing room only launch planned, and some stuff happened.
And we're not and let I've you guys know I'm I try to be optimistic about things, so I'm choosing to look at this Now now that we've lost sponsors, we've lost the original crew. We've lost a a portion of our guests and the revenue that were was tied to those guests. We're we're on our own. And we have spent the last, however, many years of our lives, being on our own, and getting by on our own, and this is a chance for us, we're redoing it. We call the mulligan, and we're redoing it. We luckily had a backup ship. It's not as good, but it it's going to get us to space and allow of people don't trust it, but we decided, you know what better way to get people to trust that this is gonna work than anything else? We're gonna live in the thing. We're gonna be inside of it we're gonna test it out on our own. We're owning this whole thing, and we next week, we'll be launching a second time and the four of us will be headed to space along with GUI Newge's pastor.
And you know this ship works because they had to make it work. Because it's -- Yes.
you know, it's a few different ships put together into one. This is an old Sessna. Right? Old Sesame with the rocket silos from
--
it's the What
were they again?
The rocket silos are just general like water and grain silos from Nebraska. So thank you to Nebraska. We're very excited about that. We are expecting that it won't make popcorn as they shoot off. We've cleared out most of the kernels.
Yes. Yes. I got these silos. They're used for my buddy tank man. He really came through. Yes. But they do have some They do have some kernels in there, which I don't think is gonna be that bad if there are a few popping out.
Honestly, and if and if the kernels pop yeah. If they pop out, that's a that's a snack for all the the onlookers. Mhmm. And maybe a distraction
i just saw the general running over. No. No. No. Popcorn kernels. We didn't call the colonel, dude. Do not mess -- Dude. -- kernel around the job.
Dude. Dude.
Dude. Dude.
Dude. Dude. Enough. No.
It has such a huge beef with the colonel. It's so frustrating. It's almost all he thinks about.
Well, he's jealous. He's got little man's. He's got Little Man's Comcast. He's got Little Man's got Little Manic.
Yeah. We gotta shoot him over to the island of Elba for a few days instead of getting a ham shoved in our face every time he's in a bad mood.
Hey, buddy. You're an insurance provider. Get over it. Get over it. But anyway, we are really excited for the big launch, and we are ready. We are in the cockpit. You heard the computer beeping and booping. Because we are firing it up, we are running our tests and boy, are we ready? I have my hair up in a bun right now because I am serious.
Yes. The public looks great.
Thank you.
We do also And it's not We wanna reassure people also though that we're not going we're not gonna repeat repeat the mistakes of earlier this this week. No. This is not gonna result in any more property damage. No. Anyone who who decides to come is not going to be singed.
And this recording is definitely coming out because we have backed up to a drop box.
Yes. We obviously had the whole recording of the last one and it was an epic. It I I would say it would have put all the humanity to shame as far as
--
oh.
--
on mic recordings of disasters.
Yes.
But it got burned in the brown box And so we're going we're going authentic this time. We got a black box.
Oh, yeah. We painted it black.
Brown box? We yeah.
Brown boxes are much cheaper. But they burn up immediately. You cannot get that
the brand is kid like
we found out.
Yeah. I was gonna say a lot of people are gonna online, they're gonna be like, guys, brown box is just a wooden box. It's it's brown wood.
Yeah. It was just a a a thing from crate and barrel called a brown box.
But we put it in And we and we had a camera
Yeah.
in it.
Yeah. Love box.
Yeah. By barks in the glove box and all this
--
it was a
--
gloves on her.
Farmhouse, chic, brown box from crate barrel with a couple of CD drives in it.
We got it half off, and we also got some nice little funny little candy flavors on the way out for a pretty affordable price too.
Well, man, such such good deals on those individual chair that we went ahead and replaced a couple of the main cockpit chairs with two nice supple leather chairs.
Two supple leather chairs.
Two supple
leather recliners up here. And that says, no. That's gonna be really nice. I want one of those for Pastor Rusted.
And I'll say this. You guys know I'm a sucker for for for aesthetic and stuff like this, and you're not gonna see us go into space without something nice on the walls. So we we were lucky enough to get a good deal on some sort of abstract wall sculptures that are on the walls in here that Yeah.
They're sort of, like, sharp mid century metal
yeah. I believe these are made from old mailboxes. They're reclaimed metal
from old
old mailboxes from the Paul Revere era of mail.
Of course, we have a beautiful tin bread box. Beautiful tin bread box in the kitchen of the Sessna.
Yeah. We've had to remove some stuff to fit this other stuff, but I think it's all non Sairy stuff. You don't need that many windows in a spaceship. We'll look out the east window. The west windows are pretty sealed shut by by the art, I would say.
A lot of people were saying that we lost the first shuttle because it was dark side of the moon themed and it was very haphazard dorm themed.
Right.
There were loose lamps.
This one is much more adult.
This is grown up. It's adult. Mhmm.
Yeah. So grown up. We actually had Chip and Joanna Gaines from fixer upper come in and do a shiplap interior, full shiplap. Yep. This should be
hidden from El Paso. This is an old plane from El Paso where stuff is cheap.
And was it I'm sorry. I thought we couldn't get chipped. I thought it was Chris and Joy in a game. Right?
That is right. We we had to get her new assistant. Chip was unavailable.
So Chris is quiet. But he's got quite the eye for decor, but it is it does have some darker elements.
Well, every once in a
while, he'll start noodling in the corner and you're like, god, this guy can really play.
This guy looks like my aunt and I love it.
I'd also I'd also really just like to go ahead and thank them because they did supply us with some sort of fixer upper tools that we sort of created a little closet in here that sorta has loose screwdrivers, nails -- Yes. -- small, like wood. Yeah. Anything that we might need to repair the shape?
A rake, but one of those old ones that's really sharp and heavy.
And hard. Yeah. That's not reliable at all.
A little pocket c's.
I think we got double a's that I think we're from my working drawer, but sometimes they get mixed up. But there's at least a couple workings in there
--
uh-huh.
--
if we need them up there. But I I don't wanna you know, we're not burying the lead because we've said it out loud, but I am excited to go to space. I'm excited again to kroon from the moon. I mean -- Yes.
i I don't know you guys are nervous after the last one, but I have I have this resolve and I don't know if it's because things on earth have gotten a little unmanageable for me. That this moon trip seems like a nice new beginning for Dwayne, Croonan Moonman.
--
Yes. I think your social life is really gonna pop on the moon. I think it's been tough for you socially here, but I think there there's gonna it's just gonna be a little easier for
can I tell you something? I had a dream last night that I was went to a moon dinner party with a bunch of aliens and none of them spit in my face when I walk to the door, and it was
oh my god. That's right.
That's through
Well, that is a low low bar. I wonder how many aliens
my bad.
we're gonna see on the moon. Oh, boy. Oh, baby.
There's so many hot aliens up there, and there's it's not gonna be, like, barren and like a desert. No. It's gonna be like That
was the seventies. That was the seventies.
Well, you gotta think about it
like Remember New York in the seventies? That was the moon in the seventies. New York is awesome now. Times Square's got big, huge plants, and pots, and it's awesome.
Well, because Everybody knows that when we originally stepped foot on the moon, some people stayed. Not the main guys.
Of course.
Neil Armstrong came back, buzz Aldron came back. I almost said, Buzzlight, you're okay back. I don't think he did. I think Bud You still went to Infinity.
I think he's either in Infinity or Beyond right now.
He's on his way. Yeah. That's for
So so they've been up there, and they've been they've been having a blast since the seventies or whenever we landed sixty nine. They've been having a blast up there getting it ready for us warming up the party.
sure.
That's right.
So I think we're gonna fit right in because we're those types of guys also. We're we're we're very similar to your Neil Armstrong and your Rose Aldrons. And those guys. I hope they
haven't closed down ETGB yet. I would love to go see a show ETGB.
Yes. I heard those aliens can rock. I heard they
can rock. Yeah. Where cool just ripped teas and
ripped jeans and I cannot explain to cigarettes.
Yeah. The remote oh, the remote zones? The remote zones
--
yes.
--
the remote zones are gonna be gonna rock out so long.
I wanna have in ten us.
It's gonna be you guys, the moon is gonna be freaking awesome. And also, it's just gonna be the first step for mankind, and the even bigger step for our new resort.
And is that
because that's right. We're bringing a flag, and we are planting that shit on the moon with the Elite's permission, of course.
We're bringing a flag and we're bringing some of our moderately priced appetizers that we serve by the pool. We got the tater skins. We got the
cripple Buffalo The buffalo cauliflower.
No. A lot of people we we put we had a whole contest and we put our flag online to get some feedback. And a lot of people are saying too busy. I don't know about that, you know. And I mean,
is our resort too busy? Do we have too many things going on at the resort? Because the flag is split up into nineteen simple quadrants
that's right.
--
with each one -- Quadrants.
--
yeah. Nineteen quadrants. We we kept the square motif.
representing
So that's nineteen times four. Number nineteen.
Nineteen of nineteen quadrants of four. That's right. Representing each piece of the resort.
Oh. And
each of them were filled up with the first nineteen things we said. Yes. Open kidding. No. Yeah. Like, no thought, no nothing thing gets said no to.
It's cool. We wanna bring our culture to space. We wanna bring our culture to space of blind support.
That's right. Yes.
You know
what I mean? No more judgment on the moon or in space, like people judge here. You know, there's not gonna be any any I don't know. Judges. You know what
i mean? Good.
Yeah. Yeah. There's not gonna be any any policeman, you know. Yeah.
Jurries and the juries. Thank god.
No juries. There would be executioners.
Oh, there will be.
There will be.
There will be.
Well, because there's not any judges or anything. So we gotta have a couple of to make all of
my life. Everybody.
Yeah. There's no courts, but there will be executioners roaming around to make all the rules and kill people if they want.
But I made like seventy hoods to kind of ingratiate ourselves. So if you run through an an executioner, just give them one of our nice hoods that we bring and up there.
Yeah.
But, yeah, folks, we're going to space. And while we're out there, I would say, subtle shores between the pirates the aliens. Yeah. I mean, the wolves. Wolf. Sorry.
And him, he means the wolves.
We don't know aliens. But between the pirates and the wolves and and kinda the the, you know, we've got Erega, yes, kinda running the business a little more. It's running
it yourself.
It's running it so fast here.
In the Alpha Wolf. Are gonna run the business while we're gone.
And I'm
gonna can I can I just get out of front get out in front of something? I've been hearing a grumblings. The the Scruit troop has published a a long expose about our business and the potential indictments for tax evasion
mhmm. -- and for building code violations and all this kind of stuff saying, that we are are leaving the planet to try to avoid prosecution. And I'm gonna tell you this right now. We're not afraid of these fuckers, so there's no way that that's the reason that we're leaving. I'm not afraid of of a I'm not afraid of a law man. I'm not afraid of a politician. I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid of anyone or anything. So so these people out here spreading these rumors
--
you're not afraid of your son or your wife?
No. I've never been afraid of my son. Okay? I've never been afraid of him. And he's I hope he's not listening. I've I've never been afraid of my son. I'd
because if he hears you talk talk back, he sort of gets really mad. Right?
He he I I'm not afraid of my son. He's
what about when you were coaching your son's baseball team and you were third base coaching, you had you waved a guy home and you got thrown out. It was a bad wave home. The ball was at second base and your son came out and spanked you in front of everybody.
You weren't afraid of him. You took it like a
i'm not afraid of him. No. I'm not afraid of him.
Second base, and you gave him a go ahead home.
I thought he could beat it. I thought he could beat it.
He's so attractive to his kids.
Too much crazy kids to be a third base coach.
little bit freaky or closer together. You got every single kid throw down at about third and a quarter base.
But it's
At his a certain point, though. And then they moved You
had the first base coach.
And you And I waved him over.
To get down. You told him was to slide in deferred. Get down. Get down.
Yeah. You you are the most kids on a team with scratched up faces and tummies of any team.
Lot of broken teeth Okay.
Well, I'll tell somebody
to get down on a wall.
Don't. Because
well, then you got some flack for that. And then you started waving them through.
already went through, like, in the other direction.
Yes. It
And I'm gonna tell you this.
I spent my get the most kids into a pickle
well, it's less learn. There what I'm saying is
you got it sponsored by Vlasic.
Yeah. Great. That's a good thing. I'm gonna say this. I don't think there's another person on the face of this God forsaken planet. Who has been put in tougher spots than Scott skip Powell. I I think I have spent my entire life, and damned if you do -- First -- damn, you
go to the lead, very tough spot.
Yes. What's not just that? It's been every drink every hair for all
my sodas in the in the cooler after the game.
Those kids on the sodas.
Juice that Vlasic had said?
You exhausted all the sodas. Get all the pickle juice.
You exhausted the soda supply.
And then your son wouldn't let you pee on the way home, so you peed your pants.
Well, but you're not scared of him, you did it with pride.
Oh, I did it. I made the choice. I'm just oh, man. I get And
it was crazy to watch because they accidentally shipped to you kids little league pants. Right? So you're wearing those white pants?
No. Actually, those are the pants that I chose to Those actually were
the wear that goes to wear.
Yeah. Yeah. I don't like the way
cartoon that day. Tell me why pants in a big hanging shirt.
Can I be honest with you guys? I was trying to look like a cartoon. I was I was trying to look like a cartoon. Because I felt like
well, it worked.
--
--
it was the easiest way for me to avoid being Why were you trying
to look like a cartoon?
I was trying to make
you stop being It doesn't
hurt to hear more seriously.
I talked I talked to They
were definitely looking at you with a little more seriousness. That's for sure.
It was the wrong choice.
Well, I think
i thought they'd be like, this guy
is not this is
not as a a threat.
You were the first person to get thrown out by an Empire we're just walking up to the field. Yeah.
And then you were the first person to get thrown out by an umpire at second. He helped the defense.
Yeah. Yeah.
And I'm also now back first.
Caught up in the pitching machine. Right? And got slung over slung over and knocked out of the it was the first little Ring home run. Right?
I did get I did get knocked out of the park.
Yeah. You you got stuck on the wheel just long enough that you went over the top and under and back out towards the fence.
And this is why I I choose not to wear a lanyard, like, you do, Sydney, because I had my coaches lanyard on. With my keys to the this the the the field house on it. They got caught in the in the the
rotate of the
pit the mechanisms. Mechanism. And I got sucked through the chute, and through thrown as as a heater. It was set
really high for a little
later, we'll say. The best batter on the other team. And he creamed me out of the park.
That was can can Griffin the fourth. Right?
Yes. Yes. Wow. No relation.
No relation.
No relation whatsoever. That's simply so a different groupie family, but it was the fourth one.
And I don't wanna keep harping on the baseball stuff but then you got so nervous about that that you just tried to stand still and they thought you were a tea and you were the most pummeled tea in history. Right? For a t bowl leak.
Yes.
Yeah. Well, and lastly, baby. Swinging off your head.
I was too tall. They said if you wanted to pretend to be a t, you should've gotten on your knees. And I said, I wasn't trying to look like a t. I was trying to look like a the umpires ball holder.
Oh, god. Well
i think we're gonna thrive on the moon.
It was a nightmare.
We're gonna thrive in space I'll tell you, for me personally, I can't wait to captain this ship in space, because I got a feeling that without the gravity holding on to me, Oh, baby, it's gonna be a whole different experience behind the wheel,
reverend. Yeah.
I mean, you think about you think about riding around on the ocean. This is like the ocean time of
the hunt.
My whole life. Yeah.
You can't crash in space. Right?
That that's exactly what I think. Exactly what I think. NIO. Oon is soft. So I think we can just pull right in like it's pulling up to sand on the beach, baby.
And I got us a couple I don't know if you guys noticed, but I put us a couple of dune buggies
--
yes. -- lunar lunar modular Lunarer buggies.
Yes.
Back there. I don't know if you guys noticed. I don't know if they're gonna work, I bought them pretty quickly.
On gas. Right? They're they're two stroke. So they may not work in space in a in a air air vacuum.
Right. Yes. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm hoping I'm I I mean, this this nine point nine engine, I got on it. I mean, it this thing will run anywhere. I'm assuming it can run on the boat.
I mean,
i had it I've had these things out in the mud for months
well, you know what we ought to do, just bring a couple of scuba tanks we got down in the locker, and then we can do a little siphon, little air from the scuba tank into your mouth right into the engine.
Yeah. Okay. So we'll just kinda we'll feed the engines like we're mother birds.
Yeah. With oxygen.
Okay. Alright.
Alright. I've got I've got a ton of oxygen from my singing lungs, so I should be able to hold that for a long.
Uh-oh.
A long time, baby.
Were you inhaling while you were singing right then?
I'm trying to learn how to circular sing like Kenny G with the saxophone so that I can sing the longest uninterrupted song of all time. So I I'm working on that, but I'll be fine on the moon. And I'm feeling good. I I talked to my powder guy and he got he got me turned to my tie into my tang. I've got that powdered. So I'm gonna be sipping on my my tangs once we're up in space. I've had a I've sucked down a few before this episode and I had a good
buzz on. My tang. That sounds delicious.
It's great. It's really great. I I I've I've tanked up everything. I I got and dried food. I'm kinda gonna be the moon chef if y'all don't mind. And
--
sure. -- you know you could see all the dried stuff we have here. I'm very excited about picking may.
Yeah. I just see some some Ben and Jerry's wrapped in tinfoil.
Yep. That's a dried hopefully, dried Ben and Jerry's pretty soon.
So that's outside the dried is
freeze dried. So, you know, ice stuff that you've then left let out long enough that it dries. Stuff that's normally frozen that dries in the sun. Smart. So I left a lot of frozen goods.
You got a bunch of freeze dried burritos, I see.
Yeah. Those should last.
Those are five out burritos
right now.
I'm assuming
all that shit over there was ice.
Yeah. See, that's what I flipped on. I came in all the all the freeze dried ice?
Yeah. You slept at well, yeah. You slept at freeze dried water is what I would call it. Okay. And it's a you know, so we'll have to wipe our feet and probably wear a non I bought everyone non slip shoes from the restaurant supply shops shoes.
Oh, nice.
Oh, okay.
Chris, we could do butt shoes too.
I was just gonna wear my sperrys.
Yeah. Top siders?
Yeah. Great. What to everybody listening at home who's still definitely planning on coming to subtle shores, a for the resort or for the rocket launch. We just wanna let you know the resort is also humming. I mean, at this point, it is being run like a top. The pirates are in almost all high level positions and they don't really steal that much anymore.
No, they have everything they need by now.
That's right. They have three chocolate fountains because they've been stealing from us. That's right. The pirates are really living high on the hog as it were.
Yeah. If you're not an early adapter, be happy because the early adopters got either got stuff stolen or were killed trying to defend their stuff Now the pirates have everything they need, and it's time for everyone else to come in. We've tested beta mode. Right. And the
pirates made a deal. Yeah. No more murders. No more murder. They promised. They said thank you -- Yes.
for the jobs, we're we don't need it anymore.
--
And how is that not in the news? They put all this other stuff in the news, but when you convince the pirates to stop murdering people at your resort. It's not even a top lead story.
We're
huge. This treaty of Argue that we sat down and we signed with them.
We had shot pretty quick. I will say.
Yeah. We did it. We went to camp red beard and sat down and did a quick little treaty of art with them. Mhmm. I will say we signed Do
you guys think we got everything we wanted or nothing we wanted?
I think it's gonna be fine, you know. I
few more securities from them. But not killing us was was the number one on the list for me, so I'm glad we got that one.
do want a
I'll say the deal was better for them than it was for us, but I don't think anybody left the table unhappy.
us being able to keep our lives, them getting
I I
remember how bad that deals used to be with us and them?
Really bad. This
they used to take whatever they wanted.
Feel like me giving up my children to get a couple more roast beefs?
We're sorry. Yeah.
Was maybe we got caught up in that roast beef, and I'll I'll -- Yeah.
--
i'll put myself in there too. I mean, I offered up because I wanted it's only in about about be about two pounds of roast beef. I don't know if that was worth it. Yeah. I mean I'm used by children.
I am not great in a poker table. I do not have a great poker face. When you we when we were kinda pitching and building and there was that energy. When you said let me throw my kids in there. Of my eyes, gave it away, I think, that that was a bad deal for us, I gave you a real look. You miss him a lot?
I miss my children a lot.
I'm sorry.
But, you know, I I who's to say that?
What a great guy.
What a great guy?
Thank you.
One of the wenches isn't a better better parrot than me.
Yes. I'd I'd say they probably are, and the parrots were pretty nice as far as deal making and instead of taking my ears and my tongue because I need those for my career. They just took my two feet and so I'm on double peg by stuff.
That was nice of them.
Double peglegs, because they left your legs they'd left your legs and still gave you gave you peglegs.
Yes. Yes.
But you're also kind of ingratiated with them. You know, I feel like they've been treating you a lot more sort of one of the crew, you know.
I I was wondering that was just me if No.
That is true.
Yeah. Okay. I don't wanna, you know, make you guys jealous of the pirates like me more now just because I gave up both feet and they put Well,
i've been hearing you sing some of those sea shanties. And, you know, I guess we were kinda hoping we'd get the invite to sing along with you, but I know that's sort of a crooner pirate thing. I I don't know if you could teach us one for the ship or something.
One of the shanties?
Yeah. You know.
Yeah. Maybe a little appreciate you guys. But if you sing a shanty wrong, they will cut out your tongue. Their pronunciation. So I didn't wanna warn you that if you do that that is the downside.
Right. Okay.
Alright. The so let's see what's one of the shanties we're saying. Which title did you all like the best? I like
i fell in love with a mermaid.
I fell in love with a mermaid?
Yeah.
Yeah. I fell in love with a mermaid.
That's also Sydney's favorite one as well. I I heard him sing it.
Alright. Well, yeah. Just follow along, I guess, and we'll try we'll try this one. Okay. Sailed one day on the lonesome sea, a woman popped up high.
I went the woman, and I said hello. And then she said back hi.
These women we see are beautiful to me to the lonesome. I
so, I went to the woman and I told her, hello, and then she said, back hi.
Hello from me and hi from her back to Harrison Hey.
She said, how are you? I said not bad. And then I said, how are you back?
Not bad. She said, Hi, hey ho. That's the stuff we said. My name by the way did I introduce myself and also good day.
She said, hey, dude, do you have anything? Or else will you leave me alone? I'm sitting here on the front of
the ship, and I want to be alone.
Alone alone, alone. And again, I am alone.
I think it took a minute in the song
to find
excuse me?
It just I might the song's sort of finding its feet here. It feels like It feels like I like Well,
you guys know it. You can jump in and harmonize it.
Finding its feet. Oh my god. What a choice of words. To a man who just want -- Dwayne.
--
his two favorite feet.
Dwayne, he didn't mean anything. He's stupid. My brother says stuff like that all times, Storm. Stupid.
I didn't mean it.
No. That's a tough rebuke.
Don't I didn't mean it, Dwayne. I didn't mean it. Oh, no. Oh, no.
Oh, that's right. And they also took my hand and replaced it with a parrot. Do you wanna say something about that?
Scott skipped. I And the
parent talks about your situation?
Yeah. They they to add insult to injury, they had trained a parent to insult specifically me. And then replace my hand with the parrot.
Sure. No need. I'll say
i was trying to be nice. We got butt fucked on this deal with the pirates.
But they are they are Yes. We did, but the consumer at the resort
yes.
--
--
loved the experience. Yes. You'll never make time down.
See what we gave up for you. And
--
yeah. -- you know, now we're in the cockpit of spaceship recording the podcast. And we are come watch us go to space. Please.
Four. I think that's
what are you guys most excited about for space? I mean, I'm most excited that we're doing it right this time. And then the family will work.
I hope I can somehow figure out the to pull off the ruse for pastor Weston. And take him to heaven.
But I really say what his expectations were? What he's what he's looking for from you or What
because most it's pretty mad
do you
that you saw a fuck hole on your fridge. You it took you a lot to even get them back to get on the trip to heaven after you saw your fridge said fuck hole on it.
He was pretty pissed, but as soon as I offer it up, I can get you to heaven. He's gullible as hell. So I think he just wants He wants to see it. He wants to see the pearly gates, he wants to walk down the streets of gold. It's gonna be tough. It has
been really hard to see him get excited for this. Yeah. I've seen a couple of his drawings of him arriving,
you know,
flowery coloring he's really geared up for this thing. And I I gotta be honest. I feel bad that I know we're just sort of popping by
the movie
coming back.
His his sermon this past Sunday, I'm different now.
It was really helpful.
It was so hopeful. So I don't know. He's gonna be devastated. We might have to kill his ass when we get up there.
Oh, don't sit on the air, but If he disappears up there or something that happened that not us killing him.
It's probably a pirate.
And he's I he sent me a pretty late voice mail the other night too that was like oh, God. This guy is exciter. He he said he couldn't sleep and he was so busy figuring out what to pack for heaven and I just broke my heart.
Yeah.
It's silly. This man is dumb.
How do you do that? You are really able to get people to trust you. There's something about your salt of the earth energy that people would just they don't think you're taking them for a ride. I mean, we are putting you in the front of house,
to be honest.
I think if people think you can fix a carburetor, they just assume you're telling them the truth when, in fact, nothing could be further from the truth. Like, usually, if you know how to change a tire bearing, you'll lie straight to somebody's face.
Yeah. You're a rich man with pretty, pretty poor skills.
Yeah. Of course, I'm a liar. Well, I I But unskilled rich man.
I think if you tell people to their face, hey, I'm gonna be upfront with you. And they buy it. That's all it is, you know. It's a it's it's the it's and then if they don't wanna do business with you again, that's how the world used to work. Handshake deals face to face. Now you're getting processed served by every Tom dick and Harry you run into. You're getting sued by everybody. For lying over email or starting a crooning college and then never actually fulfilling that and only having one semester of classes.
I don't know exactly what you're talking about. You're getting made to walk the plank by guys you used to trust
--
that's right.
just because they like to see you get wet. And then they let you back on the boat and you're shivering all day, and you can't work, and your lips are blue.
--
know exactly what you're talking about.
That feels I
But, yeah, I think that that I I could I I relate to that metaphorically. I've I've been
yeah.
I've had so many people lie to me and walk me to plank just to see me get wet metaphorically boooble. I mean every time I see the guy he's practically just peeing on me just to see today, I can get wet.
Well, not one time.
Wait. He's on water sports tour. His water sports tour heavily featured you night in and night out at the end of the catwalk.
That's right. At the in the catwalk, I was kind of the toilet and the water sports tour.
He puts you out there in a big beautiful coat walking the catwalk And then right at the end, he soaks you on a wave runner, and you look like a wet cat.
And what and the whole lead up is he's replacing his just have him wet you yet and everyone knows he's singing this, singing this song to be and they're waiting for the and then he does the reprieve. Which is And Now you are super wet. Everyone is
he ever
and does
be on you? Then he hits you the second time with the wave runner.
So he's hitting you with the way you're dressed tonight.
You look like You're kind of in full liberal action here.
You're you're dressed to the nice He's going around in
the world.
A lot of fur.
Wedding. It's a lot like the Batman show or the
show. In the park.
water World
And you're the button, Trevor.
Yeah. If you follow-up, you have Far too many pounds of clothing on. It definitely pulls you down. So you really have to make sure you stay on the catwalk that goes out into the water.
It was a really tough show. And after the first one, I had I had to call my lawyer and say, am I am I contractually obliged to do this and he said, yeah, you're pretty locked in contractually. We should get you out of it, but it's gonna cost you a lot of money. And also, you won't be able to live in his back house any more while he's married to your wife. And so I said, I need to live somewhere. And so we did we toured the country and we did we did most of Asia and most of Europe, and then we and the Antarctica ones were cold.
Those were tough. That was then those were done on snowmobiles. Is that right?
Yeah. Yeah. Those were freezing cold for me.
And he was, and you had sort of more of a toboggan, you had to say, mush, mush, and then he still will be up to you in Roosterdale.
You have the whole idea was I had I was going, I had gone across the world to see Michael buble live and I had finally gotten there with my dogs and I was saying much much very excited to see him. And then he rolls in with the snowmobile and
you know.
So he still says red.
Well, and then the audience goes, but the snow's not wet and he goes, I guess I gotta pee on him and everybody gets up start screaming pee on Dwayne. And, you know yeah. Well, they
didn't say Dwayne. Right? They weren't sure who it was.
No. By the end, my makeup, it kind of run off in my a lot of my plastic surgery is water soluble. And so they could tell it was me for this.
Because you have external plastic surgery. Right? That's right.
Is it paper?
Well, here's I think
it's like body surgery.
Here's a little trick. When you go in there and they do all the drawing on you? Just don't go back and don't wash off.
Well, that explains why I added purple lines.
Thank you. Yeah. But we are space boys. We're and why I wanna go to space. I had no more Michael buble contractually obligating me to go around the world twice getting getting hypothermia, getting peed on, getting humiliated. So I am excited to go to space and croon from the moon, something he will never do.
We should be honest with you guys. Yes. Part of me is really scared to go to space. And part of me thinks that there's nothing on the moon And it's just a barren wasteland with no oxygen.
We don't know that.
And we've worked really hard on this resort, and we've just given it to pirates, and there's wolves in the room. And part of me kinda wants to get off this ship and go and reclaim.
Regarding all that.
Well, let me tell you something.
I'm not terrible. I do.
Let me let me tell you something. Look at this moon situation, wait. What'd you say, Sydney?
We did get our beef license back. I
mean, we did get our beef license back. We She has
to leave the beef license at home.
But got but but just
don't don't lose your resolve yet, Phyllis. Let me let me let me take you back to when when Settle Shores was just a glimmer in all of our eyes. We didn't know what Settle Shores was gonna be. We could have moved down here, opened this resort, and it could have ended up being a barren wasteland with nothing and no opportunities, and nothing to keep us happy But we moved down here. We took a chance. We brought our families. We completely relocated, and we took this chance. We let and and I'll be damned if the net didn't appear, you know?
don't be
We put every egg in this basket.
Yeah. We put every single egg in this one basket, and it wasn't a bad idea, and it and we are not stupid. So
and it
only exploded once.
Yes. We've had one bad thing. We've had a few We Schimmer is a bad thing. The wolves are bad. But we've made the
best upside down and flooding
what we made the best
of it.
Mister Friends.
Now it's part of the appeal.
Losing We're
an underwater cemetery. How many other resorts can say they're also underwater cemetery.
That's right. Zero.
That's a great point.
I tell you
So when
you go to the
where to go.
moon, what? You this was a very motivational speech.
Thank you.
All you've done is motivate me to not wanna leave this place behind that I worked so hard to make as great it is. And and it is and it is. It's great and it is.
But no. But I get it. This is a great place. Okay? We've we've built our lives here. Our families have rooted here. And but we have a we have a greater calling away from this place, away from the people. That we we we love. A way a a a different a different future, guys. It's a different future.
I think we're all just hungry. Okay? I'm gonna get up walk to the galley and grab a little snack.
Oh, yes, please. If you wanna grab me maybe some of the freeze dried popsicles, Take care.
There's the little pouch
just to pop.
Yes. The little part thing with the little liquid inside and kinda colors, sticky colors -- Yes.
--
all over.
I'm sorry. My language snagged on something there.
Watching. Spaceha.
What? Ten.
Brain, your voice, you just said launching spaceship.
Oh, yeah. I did all the v o for this stuff.
Seven. Wait. What's this countdown? Six.
Ready to go to space. No. No. No.
Hang on. Wait. That's my
voice. That's my space. Tortana, stopwatch. Here. Portana, stopwatch.
Just kidding. Oh, got all my stuff.
Those are just kidding. Okay.
That was
yeah. Oh, wait. Oh.
Just kidding. Again, a double kidding.
A double kidding.
No. I'm in the galley.
Okay, folks.
We passed her
us down.
Oh, press the rest in. Oh, no. Perfect will tell me what to have him. So that's Wait.
Host just outside the door. He got Look at him.
Look at him.
He's on fire.
He's He's burnt to a crisp.
Wait. So does the any cereal?
This isn't
especially I'm actually in hell. Hold on, my gosh. Pull the recliner up.
Wait a minute. Well, at least we have
an open recliner, Dwayne, I see you've already taken.
Wait. We're really bad.
We're we're getting really tired
of here. We're we're about to take off. Wow. And and and we're sure Dennis Dennis isn't on here. Right? Dennis isn't on here?
Oh, that's the shit. Wait. I get it.
You never know where I am, but you will wish, feel my presence.
Oh my god. He's piped in somewhere.
Where are you, Dennis? Are you at are you at our makeshift Houston?
That's right. It's me. Dennis the lunatic running your Houston.
Dennis get nothing.
Her dad,
mom, and I hate Oh, no. Oh, jeez.
Oh, okay. Sorry. Okay.
Don't you dare bring up any of skips? Misgivings and bad baseball playing, Dennis, the lunatic.
Alright. I'm sorry gooey nooch. I've always loved you. You've always been my crazy uncle that I wanted to hang out with.
Oh, I appreciate that, Dennis. Yay.
That's another time. Don't do it. You can do this another time, Dennis.
I wish you were my dad, gooey nudge.
Oh, shit. I'm sorry
to you. Too, Dwayne. I wish you were too, Sydney. You're family. I'll keep you as an uncle.
Oh, okay. Jesus,
it seems like we're about that lived off.
And the cat said the cradle and the silver spoon. Really?
It's funny.
Send his dad to the moon. When's he coming home? Son. Dennis doesn't care. Dennis wants a different dad.
He really That score.
Dwayne. Dwayne, when did you write this And it it it fends me that it's so specific.
It's been percolating for a couple of months now, and
--
jesus. -- I've got different versions.
Look how high up we are.
Wow.
Wait. We're off the ground already.
We are.
Yeah. And the moon's over there. Where are we going?
Oh, yeah. We're
we're going perpendicular. What are you talking about? We go. We're going around the world, not up and out of it.
Oh, no. Is that fucking Mars?
No. Prud.
We know they can't go to Mars.
If you go to Mars, it's a life mission. You do not return.
You die there. Okay. Well, let me just turn left. I think we can turn this thing No problem.
Okay. Turn it off.
Turn off the gas.
Hold on.
Are those rings?
Oh, no. That's it. Grunt. That's
saturn? Caught, Rayness.
Sorry, you're anus. No.
We can't go to Saturn.
Neptune also might have a ring.
Turn it. Turn it.
Okay. Let me just come off the gas a little bit. Turn
it here. Well, I really, Sydney. I really hope you can control this a little better than the boats on the sea. I mean, it's just space out here. There's no
oh, now is the time to bring up that I can't drive a boat.
Just alright. Cut it a little bit. Bring it left? Okay.
Turning left. You know what? Maybe let me gas it. Maybe I came off the gas and we lost the steer.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa. Wow. The thing sounds shit, man. It's gonna
be a bitch.
Think out the second. Think out the second.
Oh, hell yeah. Look at me, he's got a v eight. I can keep us rolling. Wait. Just
alright. Look look outside look outside the window. A couple other spaceships pulled up next to us.
Oh, my god. Hey. Hey.
Everything got a heavy.
Hey. He has to fit
a heavy. Hey.
Hey, raise.
That's raise.
That's raise. Alright. You ready? Get them. Get them. Get them, Sid. Hell, yeah.
Oh, we left him in the dust.
Deborah. They got
burned.
Where were they from?
I think those were Russians,
man. Those damn Russians.
Those they they looked otherworldly to me. I don't know that Russians have that many heads.
Yeah. They see I
think we just smoke some aliens, some redneck aliens pulled up next week.
Yes, baby. US earth. US earth. Earth.
You and Earth. Well, guys, I gotta be honest, as the captain of the ship, I owe you an apology. I have no idea how to steer this thing, and we are not pointed towards the moon.
I think it says I think that's Jupiter up in front of us.
Yeah. That day day six hundred and thirty one, day six hundred and thirty one. We're continuing to record this in case our ship ever finds Earth As you know, we've set up a little bit of a confessional here. We've run pretty low on food. We've started eating our own hair.
Yeah.
Let's just say some of us? Are not rashing the hair, because it turned out they liked it a little more than others, I'm a It's a kid. And I'm I I'll say I'm kind of losing my mind up here. A crooner without an audience is is not a crooner. It's like a tree fallen in the woods.
Sydney, can you pass me some of the blonde?
Hang on. Blonde's dessert. Those are the blondies.
Is anybody at home? I'm craving a perv. Are you gonna grate some? Yeah. I'll grate some.
Will you grate some perm on my pasta? My hair pasta.
You want some perms on?
Well, yeah. I'm eating Angel hair. And if you could do some perm on there, that'd be great.
Yeah. Here we go.
We found about three.
By Angel hair, Dwayne, Thank you so much, my angel.
Yeah. You about done with your
confessional, Dwayne. I think you've you've taken
a you've taken up some time. I think
all love to use the confessional
yeah. Yeah. So We
go ahead. Go ahead. Past the confessional there. I'm actually pretty hungry. So
okay. Great. This is Scott skip, Powell, like Dwayne said, it's day six hundred and something. We're still out here in uncharted space. Yep. We haven't seen any sort of planet or star or asteroid in in weeks. I gotta say this. I never expected to enjoy the taste of hair as much as I do. It wasn't necessarily something that I wanted to do. And if in the future this log gets discovered and you cut open our bellies because our fossilized bodies are encased in rocks and you see hair in there. Just wanna say, it's not weird. And we did it we did it by our own free will.
Does anyone have any more of that male pattern t bone? No. I think It's just the the kinda end u of the t bone.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's some stuff in there.
It's the
Thank you.
Yeah. Yep.
fridge. Yeah.
Hey, Scott Skip. Do you mind if I do a little confession over at work?
Yeah. Yeah. You can jump in. You just stinks.
I wanna start off by saying I'm haunted daily by pastor Weston getting burnt up. On our launch. He was such a sweet man, and he was there dressed to the nines trying to make it to heaven and I just feel terrible. And but then again, I would have never been able to be up here and understand how much I enjoy eating hair. With my friends.
Did anyone make I was thinking maybe for breakfast we could do Denver Mullets?
That's a great idea.
Denver on bullets?
idea. In rambalets?
That's a great
Yeah. Yeah.
Young.
Yeah. I might do a bowl I might do a bowl cut of cereal.
Okay. I'm We need a rash. We do need a rash. It took us a long time to get all those styles. We did meet for four months. But there's still no to be Good.
Okay. Let me get in now.
Does anybody need want to eat some bird and get some mohawk? Yeah.
I I love a That
sounds pretty good.
We should take a bird out of the oven pretty soon. Yeah.
Okay. Here you go, Sydney.
Thank you. Thank you. Well, I'm loving the hair. I gotta say, being in space is not all bad. I mean, eating hair is surprisingly good. We all know that I came with a lot of it. And I must say the hot crossed buns are have been delicious. Definitely been enjoying the flavor saver I don't know. I'm liking it up here. I gotta say, I have it lost my mind. And if you're still listening, come to last resort, we would love to have you. I think it's still going on. And, you know,
know, well, Scott Scott's Scott's getting on my nerves a little up here. I'll say that.
but, you
If anybody wants some of this pigtails in a blanket, I've
got I
don't think I'm gonna deal with
bullshit. We need to ration God that
sounds good. I feel like I stuffed myself on happy trail mix before this, but But I do want a little bite of pigtails in a blanket. So we'll keep captains Captain's log.
Yeah.
Prunner's log. We'll keep recording these every day and hopefully you'll hear it back on earth. I don't know if we've said this yet, but there is there was life on Mars. There was life on Mars.
Yes. We've been past Mars. But they were they were
really, bro.
They were really ying.
But they were they were very hairy. Thank you. So
i'd rather be very hairy, so I really don't know. And keep on going.
You know that book better from Mars, women are from Venus? If it's all fact, it was a sausage party on it was all due, so they were unknowingly. Yeah. So we're headed to Vegas.
Down. We opened the door, and they all went
single speck of hair.
They all went, hey, howdy, bros, and we were like, no. Thank you. We looking for the puss. And we roam. So we're headed to Venus.
We're heading to Venus for the ladies. We're all
looking pretty
fun here. So If you're on Earth and you hear this, we're gonna shoot this into space. Come find us probably on Venus. Again, avoid Mars at all costs and And if
you can either bring us home or send out a hair delivery
yeah. Honestly, don't come looking for us. Just send us a -- Send there.
--
a hair delivery. Rose rash. If Road doors rash. Door.
Door rash?
Space door. Space dash. Space dash is some hair.
I also wanna say now that I'm what I assume is thousands of hundreds of thousands maybe millions of miles away, To my son, Dennis, fucking hate you. Mhmm. I hate you, and you made my life harder. And if I never see you again, it'll be too soon. And I mean that. With all of my heart.
That must have been cathartic, Scott. I know you've been waiting to tell your son that for a long time.
Yes, Scott. I think I got a little verbal. I throw it here also. Excuse me. Yeah.
I mean, it's terrible.
I guess I'm a little inspired also. To send a message to my family? If you get this. I miss so much graduations. T ball games?
That was before
before necessary. You did miss so
much graduation.
I missed all I missed every graduation. And that was before going off into space and I would have gone to those. If I had known, I would be launched into space forever.
That's right.
But I didn't go because I fucking hate all of you in my family, and that's my message to all my quote, loved ones at home. New men out, bitch, and that's for my son.
I just wanna give a quick shout out to all the patrons that we've had at subtle shores. Who've made this whole thing possible, given your lives literally, been killed by wolves, flipped over in the casino. Lost all your money in the casino. Become a pirate on accident because they wouldn't let you go, and they needed more people for their ship. Thank you all so much for floating us this whole time. And again, please send a hair package if you can.
Space order.
We're getting really hungry out here for some dessert. Ideally, some you know, ice cream hair or
harry cake would be good. I'd take a haircut cake.
Harry cake would be fantastic. Yes.
Yeah. I'd like to echo that. I'd like to say thanks to all the last resort. Patrons, I'd also like to give a special fuck you to Chevrolet trucks. The worst like a rock yeah. You are like a rock. You sink quickly, and you barely move, and you got no value to me at all.
go to hell, Chevrolet trucks, only buy Ford. And, yeah, if somebody could send me a pair p h a I r. That'd be great. Alright.
Yeah. So
I'm gonna seal this up and send it out to earth?
Wait. Hang
on one more thing. Oh. Actually, if anybody if anybody out there happens by a nice little bushel of shrub, Harry's. I would take some of those as well. Mhmm. Possible.
What about some raspberries? Black Beharries.
Yeah. Yeah.
Beharanos, Sam. Thank you Take some bitterness.
Are you gonna send it out, Dwayne?
Water Heron. Again, here we go. We're gonna send it out.
Some cajarries.
Also, some herringes would be good too.
Alright, sealing it up and sending it out with a little croon. She's my cherry pie. Pie full of hair such a sweet soup.
Sweet to hair reply.
Sweet to hair reply. Start spreading the hair.
Like butter on hair.
We're not crazy. We I can't
wait to stay
out here. We are crazy.
It's only been a year.
We aren't great.
Oh, we're not nuts out here.
No. Oh, we're
good. We're good. Alright. We're good.
And if anyone else on earth does get this, let me just say, release it. Release whatever
it is.
Don't edit this. We are crazy. Say this, I've ever been,
i told the man. Whoa. I'm done. I stole his pickle, and I shoved it in my pocket And I walked down to the bank. And I said, one pickle deposit, please.
Oh, just a pickle. That's all you hear to deposit, sir. Well, go right ahead. Could you use a lollipop on your way out? I would Excuse
me, Bella. Doctor.
Scouse me, fellas.
Not a problem, buddy.
Yeah. Stick them up. Okay. Yeah. And he's ate my fingers. These are guns, and they'll shoot you. Give me all your money and pickles.
We're same as hell. We're not nuts up here.
Nobody's lost
their mind.
Better now than a year ago.
So until next time.