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mini-10
Rude Goldbird

With their van now stolen, the guys leave D.C. and record from Port Authority in New York City.

0:00:00
spk_2
 

change changing 100. Thank you. Get a change. Reality. $100

0:00:09
spk_0
 

that's for That's my business

0:00:11
spk_3
 

time business that we said. We're sharing everything from now on. Okay? Everything goes in the pot. You don't get to keep anything for yourself anymore. None of us do. We have to

0:00:20
spk_0
 

build back up. Yeah, I got $100. I stole

0:00:23
spk_1
 

it. Who did you steal it

0:00:24
spk_0
 

from? Who I still it from? Did you

0:00:26
spk_3
 

steal that $100 for me? Todd? No, Todd.

0:00:29
spk_0
 

Know you spent your 100.

0:00:30
spk_3
 

I did not spend

0:00:31
spk_2
 

his 100 was missing this morning. And you just ask for change for 100 Todd,

0:00:37
spk_1
 

Everyone you bet at your crisp 100 right on your head on your bedside

0:00:41
spk_3
 

later. They lay it out for me in the night for the next morning with my

0:00:44
spk_1
 

clothes. Todd, did you take my 100?

0:00:46
spk_0
 

No, look, why would I admit I stole it, but then lie about stealing it from you? I stole it from someone else.

0:00:52
spk_3
 

Todd, You know what? I'm not gonna forget this. That's it. I'm not gonna be Oh,

0:00:56
spk_0
 

forget it. You're not gonna forget it'll droll.

0:00:58
spk_3
 

I know why I'm not gonna for you stole my 100. We got a long road ahead of us where I can fuck you, son.

0:01:05
spk_1
 

It was a direct

0:01:07
spk_3
 

Hey, I'll tell you guys this now, Howard, Howard Levis had a real rebirth this morning.

0:01:12
spk_1
 

Has what, a rapist?

0:01:13
spk_3
 

No, as as a guy who's going to stand up for himself from now on. Okay, you went too far. Knows

0:01:20
spk_0
 

I honestly, I can't have a board again. Rapist in my

0:01:22
spk_3
 

hey, you know what you can put you can you can suck my ass

0:01:26
spk_0
 

way do need you to have this kind of harsh exterior cause for those roll you don't know. We should probably tell the listeners fucking homeless. Now we're homeless. Are Van was stolen. Howard is our guard dog, and Howard is our guard dog. He's been sleeping on the Mac.

0:01:48
spk_2
 

We ways. Last few nights, we slept in fence tenant structures, different structures on the way here. And Howard has been ravenous with a frothy mouthed.

0:02:01
spk_3
 

I want to point out that this is the second time that I have slept outside of the place where you guys get to sleep.

0:02:06
spk_1
 

Okay? Sleep. This time you were in

0:02:08
spk_3
 

your I've been awake. I've been awake for 48 straight hours and we were most stiff and other dogs. But other dogs not I'm not a dog, Bill. There's another other dollar.

0:02:19
spk_1
 

Why are you trying to sell it so hard? By sniffing. But what? You're really out of a bowl?

0:02:24
spk_0
 

Would you rather it? But you were sniffing other dogs butts, or you were human following dogs around sniffin there. But

0:02:29
spk_3
 

I would like to just be a human being who gets to live a normal fucking human being. Life

0:02:33
spk_1
 

Winter We How are we supposed

0:02:35
spk_2
 

to all three of us sleep the whole night? If you don't be a dog and roam around

0:02:41
spk_3
 

instead of stealing each other's money, we pool resource is and we find a car or something.

0:02:46
spk_1
 

I will take the day shift. Three of

0:02:51
spk_2
 

us will take a soft day shift will look around longer. Those shifts 8 a.m. In minutes.

0:02:58
spk_0
 

Sorry. Are you just got robbed while we're taking additional? What? Somebody

0:03:03
spk_1
 

way? No,

0:03:10
spk_3
 

Todd, you were standing behind me while I was talking for 50. Please, No. Todd Todd. Hatred for 50 please. I had $100 bill and a $50 bill and you take way

0:03:23
spk_2
 

are about 12 feet from a currency exchange booth in the Port Authority bus station in New York. Were about 40 feet from the album Poom. Oh, that's right. I'm porn. How? From a porn store? Yeah. They have little pieces of porn that you can reach in and get with tongs and put in a little bag and check out that it's album Born

0:03:54
spk_3
 

this morning. I got I got a couple of knees, a couple little knees, cut out knees. I just got the knees before I shake garlic knees. Yeah. Where did we say

0:04:07
spk_1
 

what happened

0:04:07
spk_0
 

at Port Authority are saying just ah, just let's get it all out right now and then we'll know it's out. Our van was stolen by some fucking fuckers. They got it chopped. I think we think can screwed. They trap. They got it screwed.

0:04:25
spk_2
 

It was maybe t pain. They chapped instead of

0:04:28
spk_1
 

in the same thug. Could've been

0:04:30
spk_0
 

Mike Jones. Right now we do have an A p B out for T Pain, Slim thug and Mike Jones. Oh,

0:04:38
spk_2
 

yeah, it was It was Ah, we came in with three pictures to the police station were like It's these three rap

0:04:46
spk_0
 

way Know it for a fact. And so our vans gone. It had all of

0:04:51
spk_1
 

our precious possessions and wear selfies. All of our Sophie's are adviser Selfies floor, ballroom dance holer, bare skeleton. I find the road apology letter to my daughter and Masha can never get it. No, you didn't. Todo can take this opportunity to say you did that for poem by all of my stubs for donating to different charities where it s so sad. I wrote the whole origin story, but it was their in laws. Oh, yeah Keep an eye out for Sam's immaculate conception. Coming soon Coming soon TV You way doing right now? We are crying but also way together Would know what was lost on And it makes us look good Everything we lost I didn't have 10 you know what? I lost all of my free weights Oh, I lost Fells Barbeau Squat rack I lost all my undoing meal Pref and I lost all my prepared meals and official potatoes So I finally was gonna watch all of the American classics I lost Consul Blown go Really just couldn't remember how to talk about.

0:06:33
spk_0
 

So our stuff is gone and we So we said, Fuck D C. Everyone here is a thief. I mean, top to bottom, pork barrel, pork. It's pork barrel out. There's classic part. And so he said, All right, let's hit the road. How do we do that

0:06:51
spk_2
 

being eeny, meeny

0:06:54
spk_0
 

boys are back back town back, boys so are back. So now we've said, What's the nexus of the universe for travel? Port Authority.

0:07:07
spk_2
 

You can get anywhere you want to from New York's Port Authority, second State, Eighth Avenue, Gorgeous. You can't hit. You can throw a stone out of any angle of Port Authority and hit the Waris Pizza Place

0:07:24
spk_0
 

or you've ever seen. That's right. That is right. You could just to say that one more time, you could throw a stone out of any angle of Port Authority and hit the worst pizza place you ever seen. And you're right. Last night I had an extra large New York style Greece pie,

0:07:40
spk_1
 

Um, full for the extra large right away. Yes,

0:07:44
spk_0
 

I said, because New York has the best pizza by the extra large, so I always pop in and ah, first what I'll do that if there's a long line or not, I'll really think about it. And then I'll start asking these guys behind the counter a lot of questions about their What's your favorite.

0:08:02
spk_1
 

Anything more famous than taken home a big closed box of a full pizza down a busy street. Just fold that box in half and put it under your and taking it home, baby.

0:08:17
spk_2
 

Oh my God, I love holding up a box of pizza.

0:08:19
spk_0
 

I felt like I

0:08:21
spk_1
 

got a folded in New York.

0:08:22
spk_0
 

Yes, you got. That's the New York Way toe to take a pizza home. A large bunch.

0:08:27
spk_3
 

My thing about the New York pizza is how the cardboard just drips down your arm when you're holding. Yes, you know what

0:08:36
spk_2
 

I love is those little glass containers that have been kicked around the entire city and somehow make their way back up onto the counter there and they have the little ist bit of garlic in it, and you put it on. You put it on right on top of your box. You guys the box and you put it on top of the box. It's

0:08:54
spk_3
 

so humid that the garlic sauce stuck together a year ago. It's like a big clump. So

0:08:58
spk_2
 

you take it off and do what everybody does. Spit into the glass and put the lid back on and try

0:09:04
spk_1
 

what? I'm a real New Yorker. So why isn't crispy

0:09:07
spk_0
 

on the bottom? I haven't Cravy that. Are you guys? Do you to have the top of your box with paper towels and napkins? Or do you or do you just eat it

0:09:18
spk_2
 

way? What makes New York pizza good. The water in the box?

0:09:24
spk_1
 

Yeah, it's the water that makes the boxes. So

0:09:30
spk_2
 

eso get cardboard like you can in Brooklyn, New York,

0:09:34
spk_0
 

as you could tell, were a few Brooklyn boys in New York, so even sleeping in Port Authority for three days now. Yeah, and we're just waiting for the right bus to come along

0:09:45
spk_1
 

about a watch out for that cab. Last

0:09:48
spk_2
 

night, I coiled up in the warmer at a crispy cream donuts here in Port Authority. And I had the best night's sleep. Yeah, they glazed you Wait

0:10:02
spk_0
 

with the window.

0:10:05
spk_1
 

I was actually shocked that I went through that whole assembly line and it was warmer. It was warm at the beginning, but then it gets really high. Get really hot. I got crisp up in here we go again with the eating our own bodies e honestly

0:10:23
spk_3
 

was so shocked that they altered their sign just for this one thing. And it said, uh, hot bills,

0:10:29
spk_2
 

hot bills and that what makes all the contraptions that knocking to the Rube Bumi I was I didn't I didn't know. I wanted you to say, uh, it is This Port Authority is crispy cream is particularly Rube Goldberg. I mean, I was getting strange. Goldberg's getting ruled Gobert

0:10:50
spk_1
 

Rude gold birds. Yeah, Goldenberg. Yes, is the meanest burn, and it is rich. It's like you lower class

0:11:05
spk_0
 

effort stepped on my foot and then looked at me like I was in the way. Yeah, that rule or old a bird.

0:11:12
spk_1
 

I do love his contraption Where, John Sleep

0:11:15
spk_0
 

way All kind of went our separate ways last night. That way Well, you know, may if I'm in New York, I'm gonna be sleeping on Broadway. Uh, so I had the track. What's that? I made the trek

0:11:27
spk_3
 

miss thing for actors to do to sleep on Brahch sleep on

0:11:30
spk_2
 

this year. I mean, you've been trying to make it to Broadway for a long

0:11:34
spk_0
 

time. On this was my first time. Actually.

0:11:37
spk_1
 

You were on Broadway.

0:11:38
spk_0
 

I was on Broadway. Are you sure? I am positive. The bright lights s so

0:11:46
spk_2
 

far. This could be a dentist chair. Way

0:11:50
spk_0
 

Broadway. We've got the bright life. She believes that way We've got the tongue depressors I mean, the beautiful Broadway mouthwash station had everything. Ah,

0:12:05
spk_1
 

beautiful Broadway assistant. Who gives you the X ray at the beginning?

0:12:08
spk_0
 

That's right. I got my X ray on the way. You refuse the

0:12:10
spk_2
 

lead best, right? You always

0:12:12
spk_0
 

dio well, yeah. If you want an authentic theater experience, you refuse the lead best.

0:12:16
spk_1
 

How could you? How could you watch something for that long? With a big heavy That's

0:12:21
spk_3
 

exactly were definitely at the dentist, you know. Look, Manuel

0:12:24
spk_1
 

Miranda, he was there. Well, he cream my teeth. Quite honestly. Im pays. You got a dentist appointment so quick? We just got into town. There's anything less likely It's you at the dentist. Because here's the thing,

0:12:38
spk_0
 

though. The good news is I wasn't at the dentist. I was abroad. Well,

0:12:42
spk_3
 

everybody knows that The thing about getting into Broadway shows is that it's easy and you never have to wait,

0:12:46
spk_0
 

Wait, show up. What

0:12:48
spk_2
 

happened at the end of the show at the very end of the show? Was there a diagnosis or was there like a standing evaded

0:12:55
spk_3
 

my spit?

0:12:55
spk_0
 

A. To the end of the show, There was a lot of talk about what my insurance did or didn't cover from the show insurance. Well, emphasis on didn't cover, Uh, but now I I am in the I do's. I do still get sag insurance. I'm in the saggy actors guilt.

0:13:17
spk_1
 

That's for actors who are over a certain age.

0:13:22
spk_0
 

I've been in it since the baby, so it's skin type. It's skin type of saggy skin. Any actor pagodas in it? Uh, he's the only one. I think that's well, it's me of a goat and Finkel right now, Uh, but we're striking at the moment.

0:13:40
spk_1
 

Really? Think strength power for Is that a pretty powerful union voice? We'll see. We'll

0:13:46
spk_0
 

see. We've had a few scabs come in that will from scat from seven year on Sam Stand way have kept from our own skin.

0:13:54
spk_1
 

They've coming because your stuff sticking out of work.

0:13:57
spk_0
 

They crossed the picket line in the sense of they've blown up of us on the other side. Wow, that's really sad news. So, anyway, it's been beautiful to be on Broadway. I mean, it's just been a real treat for me. Where'd you guys

0:14:09
spk_1
 

sleep? Oh, my gosh. Boy, I had a pretty good night of sleep. I slept in the booth at McDonald's.

0:14:18
spk_0
 

Oh, that's okay. I've seen that in a lot of those ones. Did you Did you get the nice breakfast when you woke up?

0:14:27
spk_1
 

Well, yeah, I felt like breakfast in bed. It felt like breakfast in bed. I I yelled at them what I wanted. They brought it over to me. I flashed a little cash. They brought it to me, gave it to me right where I was sitting. But some And they found out the cash wasn't really Oh,

0:14:41
spk_2
 

So you flashed the monopoly money, or was it actually anything that even looked remotely like money?

0:14:45
spk_1
 

Well, it was receipts that I had blown my nose into green green. Interesting. Slimy green receipt printed, I think is why they fell for it. So it was good. I got the Grand Slam, McDonald. And, uh, how do you know

0:15:00
spk_0
 

where you were? Way Great. Slam McDonald

0:15:09
spk_1
 

giving a grandson, McDonald. I have money, and I flashed it really fast, and then they brought it over.

0:15:16
spk_2
 

Well, I saw you. I mean, uh, after I got cooked up and glazed, um, I did. I saw you just

0:15:26
spk_3
 

kind of having a nightmare. Well, over near

0:15:29
spk_2
 

the turnstile. So I think maybe you were just over near the turnstile having a nightmare standing

0:15:34
spk_1
 

up in one of those terms. You could be, like, cut through like an egg. Yes. Whoa. That would explain the night terrors, for sure.

0:15:43
spk_2
 

Yeah. I mean, at one point, I saw you being completely shocked. Just getting lit up by the third rail. This subway? No. Yes. Whoa, my

0:15:55
spk_1
 

dream. Zeus had thrown a lightning bolt and it sent me. It made me fall onto the third rail of the subway. Right. Pretty. There was something from

0:16:09
spk_0
 

that. Was pretty close. A big old bearded man through his came at

0:16:15
spk_1
 

IHS. Well, I think Zeus out of McDonald's.

0:16:20
spk_0
 

No, I think that old bearded a man you were in his way. He threw his came here. You fell in the third rail, and this was interesting. A bunch of people jumped on there to push you harder on. I've never seen that before.

0:16:35
spk_3
 

People sacrifice themselves. Just the shock transferred through three.

0:16:39
spk_1
 

Or I will say this. My hair has never stood straight up.

0:16:42
spk_2
 

Yeah. I mean, I I actually I got a peek of internet this morning. I got some LTTE service on the phone. We're sharing. And I did the gateway phone that Well Yeah, We yeah, way hooked up to the gate way. And I did see a viral video of your shocking grim And it was titled Man finally gets what he deserves. And it had gone

0:17:09
spk_1
 

viral. Really? Yeah. Wow. And why did I deserve it? Did they say? Because it hurt me where there was some

0:17:15
spk_2
 

speculation in the comments of why you deserved it. Um

0:17:20
spk_1
 

uh, any comments on the hair? I was pretty excited about the hair.

0:17:24
spk_0
 

Well, a lot of people were saying like, Oh, you know, that hair is stuck so up he deserved Hey did deserve to die. But his hair looks good now. Stuff like that

0:17:34
spk_1
 

I'll take this

0:17:35
spk_3
 

week. Does the Internet think that same is dead. Is that video being passed around with the like the caption that the man died?

0:17:42
spk_2
 

Yeah. I mean, it's it's

0:17:44
spk_1
 

in the snuff section of Red Tube. I look right now on the part of your time in the room with you guys.

0:17:50
spk_0
 

You're a feature. Your years on the featured page or faces of death dot com. Right. You're the the death of the month

0:17:57
spk_2
 

Jazz. The scumbags who made those tapes faces to death. Uh, they're actually coming out of retirement to put you on one of the limited edition.

0:18:06
spk_1
 

Maybe I'm bad.

0:18:08
spk_0
 

You're back. Where do you sleep? Oh, you You

0:18:11
spk_3
 

guys know where I fucking slept? Rub it into my fucking notes. Okay. Well,

0:18:15
spk_1
 

I saw it because in it again, if you do what you that way, we're

0:18:19
spk_2
 

sleeping for a minute. And then I kept getting the scruff of your neck and the back of your belt loop and throwing you into some active ah, break dancing things. And you were just getting whipped up and kicked around.

0:18:35
spk_3
 

Yeah, Yeah, I e got beat to death by some b boys. It was ridiculous. Did you sleep well? Of course. not I didn't sleep a wink. Oh, yeah, I got I woke up both black eyes. I got some my mother back of my head. I got a big old bump on it. Just

0:18:51
spk_2
 

you guys throw him into any

0:18:53
spk_1
 

performers? Well, a rendition of Stomp that was going on in an alley, I think. Uh, do you think it was an apple? You think it was a stop? It was a stomp routine. It was people screaming in an alley and throwing trash cans

0:19:07
spk_3
 

on. It wasn't Those were some people who had just come out of a real happened happening nightclub. And they're having a fight that carried over from the Yeah, so I got and I ended up getting used as a weapon in the way that you would started. Used a trash can or or a stick or something. I got swung around and buy beat one guy up.

0:19:25
spk_0
 

Oh, you're the weapon. You didn't pick him up. Someone else. You

0:19:28
spk_3
 

know, I will take ownership of that. I beat a man up.

0:19:32
spk_0
 

Okay, let's see. What did I throw you into? I know I did. What's popular, Hayes, since I've gotten here, I

0:19:40
spk_1
 

mean, this city never sleeps What wasn't there at one

0:19:44
spk_2
 

point I actually heard. And I think you did this, Todd. I actually heard a really awesome beat. It sounded really cool. It sounded like almost like it was being done on buckets. I was like, Who is this drummer with a series of buckets and little pans and stuff that he would pull up with this foot to make it sound hollow. And I walked around the corner and it was you. I had

0:20:07
spk_0
 

just fallen into some trash, so I was not. But then people started throwing me money like he was performance art. But I had just, you know, in New York when ah ah hottie walks by you. You know, you pull your sunglasses down to peak, but then back up because you remember that their prescription sunglasses

0:20:27
spk_2
 

you you're a duress smack dab into a light

0:20:31
spk_0
 

pole. So, yes, I pulled them down, ran into a light pole, then fell into a scrapyard on you know, I was doing my weekly glue tan where I go tanning. But I lather up with Elmer's because I try, the SPF will give you cancer. The sun tan lotion. Uh, What does glue dio gloves? It reflects the sun off of you, but it does not give you cancer. And

0:20:59
spk_1
 

it doesn't give you skin cancer again. He gives you sell you Look,

0:21:02
spk_0
 

here's your cellular cancer. But I have what doctors call zero sells

0:21:08
spk_1
 

theory The immaculate Life.

0:21:12
spk_0
 

Yes. Yeah, yeah, I am. Put I and put together on a quantum level by I'm non cellular. So

0:21:19
spk_2
 

every time you go to the doctor, multiple doctors run down the hall just to get a looking you.

0:21:25
spk_0
 

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm always like a take it in, fellas. Uh, but but they're like, No, no, it's because it's so unbelieving.

0:21:33
spk_1
 

And what are some of the words they're saying? Look, you could just go. I've never seen anything like this. Impossible.

0:21:39
spk_0
 

Impossible Stuff of nightmares, uh, bad. Uh, no, I think cool. Dad is what they're saying. Uh, you get confused. Really, really cool, Dad, I think I think they're saying that they dropped out the cool part of a little bit like it's a little lower cause a kind of whispering, but anyway, so, yeah, that wasn't a performance. That was me. Just trying to get all those cans off of my body. Um,

0:22:07
spk_1
 

And you accidentally used our friend here as one of the sticks

0:22:11
spk_0
 

to get the cans off my Yes. And so for about 20 hours, Howard was stuck to my hand because I got all the sticks out. I got all the trash out

0:22:20
spk_3
 

at this point. Yeah, last night was very think I was unconscious for the majority of it. And isn't that nice? No. Oh, I want to live my life.

0:22:30
spk_0
 

Well, it's day time now. So you do you think it will

0:22:33
spk_1
 

take a little nap and we'll take a little nap and it'll be fine?

0:22:36
spk_3
 

Yes. Oh, wait. You look out for us. Okay, so I don't know. No, You know what? This is an unfair arrangement. Guys.

0:22:45
spk_0
 

Change for a photo of my friend Howard's wife. What? I've just tried

0:22:51
spk_3
 

todo the wallet size photo ahead of my wife.

0:22:56
spk_0
 

OK, I stole a photo of your wife, but not from you. Don't worry. Don't worry. Stole from

0:23:03
spk_3
 

house. Being married is a huge deal. Okay, maybe married is a huge deal that we haven't ever talked about. Was him unimportant to the podcast

0:23:13
spk_0
 

right now let's talk about it we're in New York, it's so

0:23:16
spk_1
 

are Do we wait for the

0:23:18
spk_2
 

episode? Howard's wife explain.

0:23:24
spk_0
 

Keep an eye out for our explanation. Siris of Cinnamon episodes He

0:23:29
spk_1
 

is loud explains this summer. Coming up the super duper Lor Encyclopedia of Special Episodes. $35,000 per episode. Yes, if you want this info about how I was born and who Howard's wife is.

0:23:45
spk_2
 

Ponyo? Yes, emphasis on

0:23:47
spk_0
 

do pillar. So guys were in New York we've got We've got a few more days before the were doing us. We're doing bus roulette right now. Way

0:24:01
spk_2
 

get a gun. We put one bullet in it and we stand outside of buses and see if we can

0:24:07
spk_3
 

shoot. Well, I think the actual rule want Russian roulette. I think the rule that I have pitched that got immediately shot down was that we should we shoot the gun and if the bullet shoots the bus, that's the bus we take. But if the bullet doesn't shoot the bus, that's not right. We tend

0:24:24
spk_0
 

then we're like, Well, let's make it interesting, right? Let's put our heads between the gun and the bus on. So far, so good. Yeah, we're so bad There was a bullet in mind, but my hand was so weak it blew my hand backwards.

0:24:40
spk_1
 

The bullet stayed in one place going back. Physicists are studying

0:24:46
spk_3
 

your weakness. Yeah, the missing seems

0:24:48
spk_1
 

to have broken what we knew about certain long and physicists. The mythbuster supposed Mythbusters

0:24:55
spk_3
 

heard about it and they showed up to New York like this Levi's Did

0:24:58
spk_2
 

you know that in 200 years, uh, Newton will be synonymous with mythbusters? Does that make sense

0:25:07
spk_3
 

of the original that the kids, instead of talking about, you know, talking about the myth

0:25:12
spk_0
 

because the way they discovered gravity was that a beret fell on Jamie's head and he said, How did they get there? And they're like, Oh, this must be gravity. So kids are going to talk about that.

0:25:23
spk_2
 

Okay. Won't be Thomas Edison in the school books. It will be the one with red hair.

0:25:29
spk_1
 

Let's also not forget gimmicks. Was there? Yeah, screeched to a halt and said, Slowest

0:25:37
spk_2
 

bullet. Guinness showed up, beat the shit out of the Mythbusters, threw him out into the street. And then Guinness

0:25:43
spk_3
 

got the record. Also, Guinness beat the shit out of me, which felt like it wasn't. They got out

0:25:49
spk_2
 

of control.

0:25:49
spk_0
 

Yeah, that was big on

0:25:51
spk_1
 

it. Set the record for weirdest record recording.

0:25:54
spk_2
 

Yeah, yeah. Did they set their own record? Their records are becoming about themselves. How fast they screeched to a halt.

0:26:01
spk_0
 

Things does bring up the big Guinness Mythbusters rivalry is creating records, and Mythbusters is busting them on their mythbusters. That's following Guinness around. And these guys are going at it. Yeah,

0:26:14
spk_1
 

Guinness's new catchphrases, these air not myths, thes air, not myths. These air records not

0:26:22
spk_0
 

bust them. But because a lot of the records and myths involved what my body can and can't do now they're dropping me off buildings, right? Put me in car crash. They

0:26:34
spk_2
 

tried to make you fat and twins and put you on little motorcycle.

0:26:37
spk_0
 

Yeah, yeah, which worked for a day. I was too fat twins on motorcycles,

0:26:41
spk_1
 

and I miss bod.

0:26:44
spk_0
 

Oh, yeah. Whose body? Podd was my twin Todd thrust up like station. He was amazing.

0:26:52
spk_2
 

They took a piece of your femur and built bod and bade was awesome.

0:27:00
spk_0
 

Well, thank you. I'll take that as a company. You guys really like hanging out with that part of that twin version.

0:27:06
spk_1
 

So you're funny. And he was an

0:27:10
spk_2
 

actor, and he signed his headshot for me

0:27:14
spk_0
 

back. Practically assigned had tried to me because we look so similar. What? I decided to have both of them.

0:27:19
spk_1
 

No, don't tax my picture of five. Todd Body was so cool. Remember when he went into that Burger King with us and made fun of all the employees? Oh, my God. I mean, really nailed one of them seem to be swamped. And all you do is drop fries and fryer always find an idiot. I don't

0:27:40
spk_0
 

know who the guy was that he roasted. I think you guys were doing that. Well, I

0:27:44
spk_1
 

looked similar. It was like a mirror image thing. It was wild.

0:27:48
spk_0
 

Well, I didn't immediately get a job at Burger King when we got out here. Um, I'll say maybe some understanding, because dropping fries, I imagine into a fryer can be hard, overwhelming work. It's hot in there. You want to eat that oil all the time and you're holding back. You know,

0:28:08
spk_1
 

I was

0:28:10
spk_3
 

a frank a long time as a kid, and, uh,

0:28:15
spk_1
 

it was a three d o

0:28:20
spk_3
 

street. 1/2 when I got my job and I did until I was 13 and 14. Youngest record. It's easiest job anyone has ever had.

0:28:30
spk_0
 

Well, yeah, maybe for like some. I've always said about you. You're some sort of MacArthur genius. You know, you

0:28:37
spk_3
 

never said that. You said the opposite. You called me worse names.

0:28:40
spk_1
 

We say nice things about you when you're not around all the time. Really? Your way should tell Howard some of the nice

0:28:46
spk_3
 

thing. I would love it if for just for even two seconds, you guys would all say something. Not

0:28:51
spk_1
 

so much A. There's so many. You are. It's unbelievable. But every

0:28:58
spk_2
 

time I walk by someone and I go, there they are. That's the ugliest person on earth. You show up and you haven't beat.

0:29:07
spk_1
 

It's unbelievable.

0:29:09
spk_3
 

Not a nice ring,

0:29:10
spk_0
 

Bill. Let's see how that could be taken as an insult.

0:29:13
spk_1
 

Sure, I guess I'm sorry you felt that

0:29:15
spk_3
 

way. That's not an apology, Bill. I'll

0:29:18
spk_0
 

say I'll say this, Howard, you're faster than anybody. I know you in a foot race. You could beat me seven out of 10 times. You are a fast dude. What is

0:29:31
spk_2
 

running to usually what's at the end?

0:29:35
spk_0
 

What's at the end of the foot race? Yeah, when he's beating me. Yeah. I don't know. Do you have something?

0:29:41
spk_1
 

There's a nice compliment that things about you. You know what I was thinking about? Admiration

0:29:47
spk_0
 

To doughnuts your fat ass.

0:29:48
spk_1
 

I don't mind about you. The other day, and I and I really was thinking like, man, I just don't appreciate Howard as much. Hey, isn't as stupid as he is? What, e I don't think

0:30:06
spk_3
 

you guys know what nice things. Or I could say a very nice thing about all three of you. Like this. It was Sam. I appreciate your entrepreneurial spirit, Bill. I appreciate your enthusiasm, your enthusiasm in almost every context. Todd, I admire your perseverance. You've had the toughest life of anybody I've ever met,

0:30:22
spk_1
 

and I don't know we love that hat, Todd, that you t o

0:30:32
spk_0
 

like to exchange this This man this Howard Half Howard University

0:30:38
spk_1
 

way that we could do that.

0:30:40
spk_0
 

Thank you.

0:30:41
spk_3
 

Wow. I just had a nice thing about all three. You guys just grazed past.

0:30:45
spk_0
 

Look, I paid right now. I'll pay you 20 conference in a row, please. Right off the top of my dare. You wait a

0:30:53
spk_1
 

normal This is so normal.

0:30:55
spk_0
 

Count him out for me. Okay? All right. You are so supportive. One, uh, you're the fastest guy. No, I'm using that video. So when we're splitting a bill in a restaurant and you cover it, you immediately request me for the money on, so I don't. When we go to movies together, you, uh you never sit on me. You don't think

0:31:24
spk_1
 

that way,

0:31:27
spk_0
 

That's what That's what Um uh uh Oh, you, uh you have you once had all your teeth.

0:31:34
spk_1
 

Oh, my God. You

0:31:35
spk_0
 

Now you still dio government. Even though even though your parents never loved you, you still find a way. Skip. Pass

0:31:45
spk_1
 

on. That's 20. That was gorgeous. Time. Wow, 20 sweet

0:31:50
spk_3
 

things. You know what? Some of those are really? No time.

0:31:54
spk_0
 

They cheated me. They treated me. I'm gonna try to get to 20 for real. When you when you goto? Uh,

0:32:01
spk_3
 

he's that we're not playing the left. Bill.

0:32:04
spk_0
 

All right. Uh, OK,

0:32:07
spk_1
 

celebrities, names and

0:32:08
spk_0
 

them. Um, you OK? Your You did Captain Eo, You did Captain Eo at Disneyland. That was your show. What? You did Captain

0:32:18
spk_1
 

me. You put out Flacco. Why? I know you're you're he high the brain behind your his creative

0:32:28
spk_3
 

director. So I'm not anywhere in any way connected to Michael.

0:32:35
spk_1
 

You know what learned we have been talking

0:32:37
spk_2
 

about him. And so long you're is creative director. No. All right, that's eight.

0:32:42
spk_0
 

You're Michael Jackson's creative director. Big. That's such a good complement. Nine, When you make a grilled cheese, you finish it. You've never not finished a grilled cheese. Oh, I know you. You're you do a podcast with

0:32:58
spk_1
 

may in where they did.

0:33:00
spk_2
 

Yeah, he's fast.

0:33:02
spk_0
 

Uh oh. You make women. Uh, if I want to be in a room with no women in it, you walk in and it'll clear

0:33:08
spk_3
 

out really good. I don't have a great summer. Have a great summer. Okay, that's not a compliment. That z essentially telling me, Larry,

0:33:23
spk_0
 

you're super cool in Miss Davis's Class s so long ago. Thank you. All right, well, so I'm Howard's nicest friend.

0:33:34
spk_3
 

I mean, it is. I agree, Todd. Way you

0:33:37
spk_0
 

are, gentleman. If you didn't know already, you've been listening to the Teachers lounge, the first, best and only podcast about issues pertaining to the Hamilton.

0:33:44
spk_2
 

Yes. Now we are lying on our backs in port authority with microphone.

0:33:49
spk_0
 

It's that time of night. We're about to go to bed. Howard, uh, wake up. Our, uh

0:33:59
spk_1
 

Yeah, it's just going to close out the episode nice and tight.

0:34:02
spk_0
 

Um, and what we're excited for now is we're in New York and we're waiting for the bus. And who knows where we could go

0:34:10
spk_1
 

Excited that we're waiting for the but who knows

0:34:12
spk_0
 

where we could go?

0:34:13
spk_2
 

You guys got no fuckin idea.

0:34:16
spk_0
 

You have no idea where we're gonna go or how excited we are. And as we know in podcasting, you always endure episode. Always find me a podcast for so they don't end the episode and I'll find you a podcast that doesn't exist. And that's what we're doing right now. Me, I'm gonna say good night, and I'm

0:34:41
spk_3
 

gonna say good luck. I'm gonna say, um Ah, good God. Speed. Okay. And I'm going to say and that's our time. Am I? Can I say or is that are wanting her? Yeah, I'm going to say stay Flippy. Okay.

0:35:08
spk_1
 

Okay. Teachers Pat,

0:35:12
spk_0
 

stay Flippy Everybody's data that we've got to be quiet because the we're not letting

0:35:17
spk_1
 

you quite quite the rats or sleeping night rats. Come on, you reds. Good. It's stomping. Excuse me. Red. Yes, Me, you to is the movie. Is that true? Oh, yeah, it is X dodged in Paris for a while now. I'm making the hard work that LeBron are. Then fish restrict and ride working in a fish restaurant. And what about story? You know? Yeah, the mouse. And I know you don't have a little morning Ram. What do you think about pizza? We don't own their We kill me because I rad ist Bill. You are. So you always been rad ist Oh, come on. It was my upbringing mixing person. Thank you for I'm gonna do better way. I really appreciate that in the community. Do

0:36:35
spk_0
 

you know of the Mafia rats that tried to kill us a few seasons ago?

0:36:38
spk_1
 

Yeah. Doesn't like new, are they this hungry? Very hungry. Tell them to eat. Are fucking shorts? Yeah, Tell him. Tell him to do their worst. Because we're here in New York and we know you motherfuckers talk to each other. Well, I'm bringing the whole bunch of rats down on your ass is gonna be here. My

0:37:06
spk_0
 

Weightman We get the strongest girl dug in the biz, Nick on every single one

0:37:13
spk_1
 

of out. Oh, yeah, Go ahead, Play them all you want. Here's a care home once you got him outside his hands. How? Oh, God, just smash that. You just killed gratitude. You killed Bradley. Just about to head back and eat some cheese anyway.

0:37:29
spk_0
 

Bill! Bill! Bill! Rats! Bill! Bill,

0:37:34
spk_3
 

It's just come, Bill, you have to be. You can't say that. Well, you don't be

0:37:41
spk_1
 

radisys. Nobody wants a rabbi outcast or bunch of rats trying to kill our ass. He's

0:37:48
spk_0
 

got him. Uh huh. And M O U s 13 tattoo Podd

0:38:00
spk_1
 

amounts. We're fucked. You're fucked. If mass there. Steen is after us. We're fucked. The

0:38:06
spk_0
 

South American gangster. Okay, no is associate with

0:38:10
spk_3
 

We got to get on the next bus out of here. Guys, we have to We can't play busters anymore. But what

0:38:15
spk_1
 

do you think he's connected? L cheese.

0:38:20
spk_0
 

If he's gonna master t handle cheese. Oh, my God. Our fingerprints are all over this situation. We

0:38:30
spk_1
 

can't get rid of the body, especially if you hide the body. You voted for second season Flippy returning with

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