The Nurse's Office

Okay. Uh, existing testing. This is November 6. 2019. Nurse Gabriel Zell's log of the day make All right. Um all right, who's first? Ah, the sign in sheet. Everybody kind of signing next to each other instead of in order.

I think we argument the same way you

came in the same time. That sounds like everybody is pretty sick out here. We have

to prove who's the sickest

GOPers? Um, I think that's a pretty good system. Actually, I, uh because I don't want to be rude to anybody, So let me just roll across and see everybody. Seems pretty sick. Pretty

for proving. Let me take off my long sleeve

your long sleeve.

I have a couple different things I have, like, cock up. So also have

Let's start with Jarrett. Jarrett. Um yeah, go ahead. Jeff Jarrett. You're kind of wheezing over there. Um, do you? Is it related to your asthma?

E think so? I, uh, after gym class, I changed out of gym clothes and I I went back to the bleachers away for the bell, and I started wheezing. Jerk,

Shut up. Your as you tell the story, you were kind of getting a little more nervous and into it. And so you're making. You're wheezing worse.

No, it's the wheezing. It's It's just the way that I have to breathe, because I could only get enough breath to say a few words.

Hey, I don't want to spoil anything. Oh, our shoes too soon. But you're it. It's looking like you're going to be last just squeezing it, giving me anxiety. Wheezing gives me anxiety. Let me at least I'm gonna lie. I'm gonna light some tramp over here. I mean, a big log. Think that's that? You know, it stinks because you're used to your perfumes and colognes. This is what we're supposed to smell like. And it's the biggest log possible. I log out of our budget, and so now it's gonna smell

so hazy. Okay? And also, I don't know if that loose to Shiki is a good is a proper medical garment for the school nurse.

I know it's cut like a medical coat, but clearly

it's cut like a coat, and it's it fits to my body. Do you know what I mean? Now there's no secret. There's no secret here. So you could diagnose me and Aiken diagnosis you so, Jared, let's hear. Just suck on this inhaler for a second. Empty. Well, so suck. There's always a little at the end. It's cash, but you can always get a little bit to thread at the end. There. Okay, let's provide.

I ate something bad.

Okay, big fat turn over there. So let's see. Uh,

I think I ate coming.

All right, Well, and this is, um I

don't just got a lot fatter.

I don't recognize you. You are your stepson. Oh, Jiminy Christmas. Okay, Germany. I just didn't recognize you with that big, fat tongue. And you're wearing your, um What are you wearing there? Is that someone else is No, that's your face. Okay. And then did you draw a bunch of white dots on your face?

No, I'm sick. I think I ate something bad.

Game. I got stung by a bee or something. You're so

Okay, Alright.

well, I ate something bad. I think shellfish and then a bee stung me on the tongue.

Okay, well, let's talk about what? Do you have any allergies? Shellfish. Okay, Pino. Okay.

Used. You don't know about

the allergies steps?

Emphasis on step okay? It's not like I don't know, my son's allergies, I know has allergies. He's allergic to shrimp. And I know that now because he died of a shrimp Overdosed. Okay, well, lets up. Let's see Here, um, and give me your name one more time and I won't forget it again. Jiminy Christmas! So easy to remember. It's so odd. I should remember it. So Jiminy, I want to dio You seem like you might be priority here. Um uh, let's do something just a little bit. Well, we'll see. Uh, I do want to give you an Eastern solution here, so I'm just gonna

like I need my MP pan Bad that I lived it in my other book bag.

Okay, well, that and what do we say at home find? Take to book bags. I'll pay $100 for this Swedish put brand book. One

albums more neutral and Williams A fun color.

Okay, well, you like to switch it up. You know, it's not a fun color all red from not being able to breathe anymore. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna acupuncture you, just

like I would go white, not

red. Who's Who's the unregistered nurse? All of us. Okay, Who is paid to be a nurse? Are you really a u r n? Yes. I'm unearned. Okay. And you're gonna be in one. If you guys don't know what the Eastern solution, it's gonna be just a little acupuncture. So lay on down.

You wait. Those

Aaron acupuncture needles, those air kebabs, it's does her wooden kebab is

not the type of meal you use is if you hit the pressure point or not. Thing is, I run. Yes, I soak them, I soak them in water. So they're nice and wet and soggy. Okay? And the nice thing is, I dip some of the use in some barb. Asshole. We got ourselves a kebab later tonight, so they're nice and refresh.

Okay. Where you gonna put it O

time. There you

go, you punk. You just go on the sort of fancy Oh,

now is gonna give the best blowjobs. Good. Okay, fine. You know, you look pretty burst for the where. Well, if it isn't little Steven. Margaret. Margaret, how you doing? I haven't seen you in five or six years. How the hell your parents

there. Okay. Waiting so folksy.

Ahead shape. Here you go. Oh,

sorry. Shook you too hard. Move. The Naga went out one second. Emulate that. And who here likes Enya? Immunization? No, no. The soup. Yes, the musician

I would take. I really hungry.

There is no such things in your soup. Oh, you're hungry. OK, so first symptom hungry. Ah, What else are you symptoms over here.

Well, I just have a really bad cough, and I have a sore throat, but it feels worse than a normal sort. Yeah. Don't selected me. No, I don't want that.

Well, I think we're gonna do an emergency council

that No, I think I just might have strap or something.

Yeah. Yeah. And you know what? Strip comes from bad tonsils. So, um, let me You

want me to put your handing me of a mask?

All right. Here, you put this on. Okay.

I'm sorry. Assistant Christmas. Would

you like to do inpatient or outpatient here? Would you like to go under?

Yeah.

Okay. So are many. Jude, I'm gonna need you to monitor the Anestis monitor his levels here. We're just gonna

hold his wrist and do audible beefs.

Okay, That's perfect. people who's gonna s. So you know, we're

gonna play the music, You sing it. I can't afford the royalties for it. Okay. Uh, great. It sounds like you're doing great. So open wide. Why does a house wide is a house here and turn your head and cough? Someone's got a hernia to Okay, We're going to need a hernia. Active. Me. So, uh, okay. Emergency or any active me, Doctor? Dr. Too easy, You doctor. Dr. Easy. All right, I'm gonna need another. I mean, uh, give me some Vicodin and let's just do it. Push this up. Crush up the Viking, and we're going procedure. We're going to make you a t here. We're gonna make your Vicodin T o. Someone started it already. Okay. All right. I feel like we're kind of losing the room here. So everybody, let's focus here. And we're just gonna take these tonsils out and also push the hernia backup. Eso a slice and dice both at once. Okay. What blood type? Are you okay? What blood type are you? Easy to know. We're gonna connect you guys because you're losing a lot of blood over here. Yeah, we're gonna have to do? Needle, toe, arm. Don't worry that who Here? All right, let's raise their hands If we saw Mad Max the new Mad Max the Thunder Road, all right. And that hands up was just a trick to get those needles right in the Oh, alright. But what are they? I use those for a group for a grilled pineapple last night. So it might be that, um are they Are they in there? They're

going to inject. And mine is just a reusable metal straw behinds. One of those things

that you put icing on a cake.

Ok, well, uh, secrets out. I'm a

bit of food. Amateur chef home. It's kind of the way I

unwind at night, so I kind of cross over. So I got this job to get some supplies for my chef ing eso. It's open wide, and let's get a Popsicle stick in there. Yes, it's a spatula because chefs don't cook popsicles. All right. It sounds like you're your hernia problems making you stupid, cause there's some brain swelling in there.

Hello? You seem like one of our other teachers.

Well, I'm not, um okay. Looks like the choppers out again. So I need someone on Ciampa moderate. Let's So let's get you off the pole. Sit on the champ. Which picture? Because of the champ. Because that the energy goes away. What is with the wheezing? Does anyone here that?

Where is that coming from? It's going a little bit like overcook. Do you want us preparing things? I don't know, OK, I don't know. I got it. I got I got so much still for you chopping

the tonsils. You trumpet the Todd. There's no chopped lettuce needed for the order. Do you see that

job? Tomato? Where is the

wheezing noise coming from? Is there a balloon? Loosen. He okay? Scared that out of you. You're scared. It's worse than

I. I'm gonna I guess I'll wash the just

wash the plates, please watch the plates because we're gonna have to use the plates on your eyes if you die. Okay.

Wait. I think I'm okay. Can we just stop doing so much stuff?

Oh, yeah. Let me just give this weezy mouth to mouth. I think we gotta get out to about them here. So what? Or a war girl Oh, has that we use now You just words in you and just breathed in yet. See what a lot of Eastern medicine. A lot of your pains or psychosomatic

and way Israel, Theo.

And you turned him right into his cheek cheese.

Out of real parents, straight up to the teaching teacher. I told you

guys, it's all about your mind body. I bet the doctor told you you'd never Cheech onto a moonwalk.

Told me I'd never moonwalk ago. Bridges walked in. And Martin? Bashir? They're doing it area.

What are they doing? Oprah? And one Bashir. Is this a from her but same

store interview? G? He Okay.

What? So you're healed? Your we's has your he's going. Oh, double breath. That's double Todd. Todo

Keep that going. You remember? Way, Way. Okay. All right. I'm looking for a special Well, look at this. So now you, too. Okay. Okay. All right. Way. All right, Miss, your cooking is making us all. Well,

don't get too my head. Don't tell you. Okay, let's just

start with on the cake. Odd. I look again

Now, I remember when you came in here and I took away, though. You see your legs? Yeah. And now you're saying we're the cake like Michael Jackson, where the world and you can walk again. OK, so this

is your the best nurse ever.

Hi. This is the nurse from the beginning. Back on my tape. Uh, and the try, this is trial number 282 to prove that even though Michael Jackson did some bad things, his music can heal. Okay. And so people are complicated, right? Give me a big nod, Students that he'll be a So when he when it when he's playing at my parties. I don't want to be shamed by people anymore. Or if I'm singing along to his music a jersey Mike's I don't want people to say they shouldn't even be playing this anymore. Okay, if someone is as weird and ridiculous eyes that you can't just forget about him all of a sudden and I am sorry to his victims, and I'm really my thoughts go out to you and I believe you put the guys weird, and I think we can't forget that stuff. Okay, so I

better now eyes meeting peanut butter. I think I'm gonna p o anymore. Oh, you know what? He gets really Lows me high and low way here looking here. Really? This is just wouldn't my normal voice

Sounds like

Oh, my God. You just sound like MJ. So let me hear it now.

You. I love you, Lisa. Hey,

M j. From The Simpsons over

their way. You re Presley. It's Maggie. Oh, renders Don't have a job now, man. What is your creepy? Thank you for healing us, Nurse. Yes, Thank you. He

You're very welcome. And, uh uh, on the way out, I think the best way to kind of seal the hell is just a

quick I feel that is a little

MJ sign off. So just sign off how you would but his m jail together now. So 567 Okay. Was that good or do we not like that? And we want to try a different one

that works for me.

I hope I can just stay healthy. Yeah. And also stay Flippy.

You should see everybody stay for