Post-game Conference Pt. 2

All right, That's it. Where this is Shut down were Shut it down.

But he's grabbing his purse. Put sunglasses on.

I've seen King James do this. And this is the King James version, Of course. Dressed in the other King James outfit. Big logro Goodbye. Slam. We're gonna leave. Still make narrating way. Did you see that in there? I just let him have it. I gave him the forearm to the crease of the arm and I stormed out with my purse. I gave him the King James version. Uber for Bill. Yes, that's Bay. Thank you. Hey, what's up?

You get usually people sit in the back. You're taking the

right. Yeah. Now I forgot. I just

sit up here. I don't want you to make make you feel like you're, you know, driving me somewhere. Just that we're just friends.

That's actually my soda. That's 1/2 drink. So it's not for customers

about that. Sorry about that. I just instinctual. I just reached down to the cup holder. He had you get the address? Pretty good.

Yeah, I got the address. It's like 20 feet away. Is that right?

Pretty good. Pretty good.

Has it you've been driving for a while. Do you do live?

Yeah, I do. Uber lift ideo Postmates in between shifts. And

was that why they're all that? Seems like you

me of Postmates shift? If you don't mind, I gotta make a few quick stop before I dropped a

few way were at 11. 41 we're going to 11. 43. What do you wanna let

it wanted? 11. 42 which is a Quadra plex. All right, Postmates for Sam.

Yeah. Hey, where's my order? Sam? What? Sam, what's up? His bail. I'm in the front. Whoa, Bill, how's it going? You're doing post match now. I'm doing Cooper with this guy, but he does lift and Postmates to what else you do.

Um, Other car stuff. Car Vonna Car bombs are for sale curve on. Why do you come from where I sell Teavana out of my car and this car is for sale. Also,

car Vonna is selling tea. Teavana. I ordered seven salads four hours ago. What's going on?

Well, sir, um, the salads you ordered were pretty. There were a lot of what's the word changes a lot of occasions modification, so lattice extra onion ring on extra. They didn't understand the extra spicy on your Greek salad and canned. Sorry about the way. Here you go. And your two bananas also. Okay. Thank you. I

couldn't believe they had bananas. What you doing tonight? Uh, not much. Are just gonna eat all these healthy salad at home? I was. Should I have a diet? You're on a diet you're ordering. I think you're supposed to not just order and eat a lot of salads in one sitting, right? I think it's like, you know, do salads instead of Well, I'm not doing bread anymore. So I got what I got was the Cobb salad, you know, with ranch and of Kano. And and then I added a burger patty to avoid bun over there is not normally a bun. Yeah, to avoid the bun of the burger, added a burger patty to the top of a large cop salad. And then I got a second compass salad with no lettuce, all onion rings. That sounds like onion rings, ranch bacon bits. Oh, well, I just started a new diet, and I have to show my trainer every week, so I Technically, I can short the receipt and shield. You have Teoh receipts. Well, I have. Yeah. You either entered into a log or show your receipt. Technically, they don't want you eat out a lot. But I said, what if it's salads? So did you start with the log? And she said, This is bull. You gotta show. I haven't met with her yet. I'm going to see if his tricks. So you got

started. There wasn't that you started with the log, and she said, This is bull.

No. First she didn't say This is Bull

Ford Taurus for Howard.

Oh, yeah.

You have my car?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Howard, you hang out on this block,

so we gotta get out of the car making a car sale here. We're gonna have to transfer.

Get out. What? Sam say, what's up? What's up? I just nailed a press conference

and I'm waiting to read about it in the paper.

What was your name, sir?

Uh oh, You're talking about him?

Yeah. Okay. Sounds familiar. Why is that? It can't be because Todd was pretending to be somebody else in the press conference. I know that it can be questioning zippers or quick. Were you gonna say Lionel Richie?

No. Uh, now, Well, I mean,

I look in the app I can look in the app and see what his name is.

It's Lionel. Poor guy.

Yeah, actually, that's it says I hear

landline poor guys are the opposite of Richie. L poor guy. You've got Or is it or is that the plural for pork?

Plural for port. The port, the animal. What is a single Star Wars Star Wars over, guys. A little bug. I got animals.

Do you sing? Do you sing? And is it Lionel Richie? And also Star Wars pork? I slammed together type of stuff for enough, you know. Okay, wait. And youth are Let's once

you name a Lionel Richie saw

you know so much. Actually, I don't think that is one, but I know I got

Aaron Neville coming from over here. Okay?

Okay. So that's not It is there

in all night long dancing on the ceiling

You are

endless love. I mean, this guy is

program Blumberg Chumbawamba Hope Sam trying one and missing hard. Well, I don't know what everybody knows me.

Oh, my long ditch on Soon

I fit in number one boat. What? But it's plural. Poor ye pork. Okay, Related a

lot of these pores. Poor guy. Oh, these poor people in the street dancing with one poke. If anymore, it's all these pores.

Poor guy. Wow. Actually, that's pretty good. That what you said you dio all these pork, so I don't know how you sing that without getting multiple lawsuits from D. C. And

kids to ago doesn't exist.

Sure. What's all this Burger King stuff in the taxi Postmates

Bill left back there.

I didn't get it here with shit, man. I nailed the conference and I got out here

and And also, by the way, this is supposed to be a transaction. I ordered a tourist off

of car Vonna. Okay, that'll be Let's see what it would you would curve on a quote you.

Ah, Let me see. Let me get the receipt here. Uh, you gotta show your seats to your dietitian to

If you don't show it, it's

I'm buying this car to show my position in your account. Yeah, it's Ah, I got a quote for $13,000. Okay, Seems a little high.

bowl.

30,000 from I 95 4 Tourists Get yourself

car. Podd does not sell cars that old. It's like, classically like three years old. And typically you got to go pick him up out of the vending machine. That's sort of the

whole the whole

deal. Yeah, the vending machine. The car vending machine outside of a 7 11

Why do you think this is curve on of the is? It's a little misspelled. It's like the Nirvana album cover, but it's me naked on the front. Uh,

well, that being that, it seems like the Penis is the same size as they definitely nailed the Penis on this parody. This is good. Wait. Did they keep the original Penis from the baby or is that yours? Yeah. This is supposed to be a parody, right? Grown man, baby Penis disparity. This is safe under parody law. Is that what you're saying?

That's its real deal, baby. That's my real peters. That's the really small Podd back there. Those are both mind. Come on, the

bus, not yours. Be serious about the but it's bull. We're calling

Bowl

Lewis are taking a focal

way. Was up. Was that where you're at? She started five minutes ago.

Okay. Well, look, um, I'll be there in just a little bit. Can you just cover for me for 30 minutes?

Don't call Todd. And things were always so much worse when he's here. Was everybody knew said that somebody needs to make the waters. Someone who wants to open. So do offer. Dear Todd. That's what needs Todd. Who keeps saying that. Okay, well, I'll bring him in and I'll fire him. Okay. Rock, Paper. Scissors for firing, Todd. OK, OK. 123 Shoot. Hold on. You don't say Burger King. We just do rock paper, scissors, and we do it on shoot. Okay, Sorry. 1123 Shoot. You did it late. And you change. You change to scissors. When she signed, they understood that I would avoid Okay for real this time. Rials to find No, it's defy fire. Todd. Nine. No. Burger King's. Okay, No Burger King's no die knees and no policies. Okay. And change us. Deal. All right. Wong Kei Paper scissors. Shoot. I should have thrown Burger King. Okay, you can tell Todd. Dina bait beats Burger King. I know. He said no dynamites and no burger Kings, but If we each do one, it's state. We both cheated. So it's fair. You're right. You would think a Burger King beats dynamite. Hey, hey, Hey, Todd, are you still in line?

Yes, I I don't know. I'm

so I need you in thing. I need you in first thing in the morning.

So not right now.

Not today, not today, but first thing in the morning and come with Kleenexes Base, Go with Kleenex. Okay, maybe some drive you block of the day. So I have someone else drive You getting in the inpatient? Fiery. Make sure you don't eat too much. Come empty stomached Block out the day. Bring Kleenexes come early in the morning and wear something comfortable. Sorry, I'm up to the I'm up to the mouth of the phone now. That's Raj Rogers here We did rock, paper, scissors, Burger King Dynamite to call you for no reason on commit first thing in the morning. Okay. Good bye,

you guys, I'm still in the dark through

Oh, we have a customer.

Yeah, I mean, I placed an order a second ago. You still haven't told me my total.

All right. You want Finke's BK Figis Do you want? BK Finke's? Is that what you said? That a large crunchy

I'm gonna take BK fifties? A large crunchy I'll take

You want that crunchy with sauce? Uh, currency sauced so famously crunchy with sauce. Crunchies the

sauce on. Then let me slave Flakes, flakes, flakes or trump

about the turn. What's that? A smooth and turn.

I'll take a smooth and turn with flakes on the

top. Less choke. That's junk. Okay, well, that's chunk. We both are taking your order smooth and turn less chunk flakes we

want. And don't forget beef dippers. We want beef dippers

will also take a beef dipper

with something. I say that from the back

Guys. Hang on, honey. Did you want starting Kipper? Large beef dipper, Medium beef

Dipper will be dipper. Let's do four smalls or sure, just do one excel. Will

you one excel Beef Dipper

Separate Smalls? No, no. Separated up into small chemistry.

Set it up in a small canister

phone with it. Todd. Any their whole please. We take in order. Okay. Again. Ah, smooth and turn less chunk with flake. Yeah. Beating your sauce. Separated for small cannister. Ticked over eyes.

Exercise separated in the smalls. Um,

crunchy with sauce. Cranberry sauce, Pinkies with

fingers with sauces. Well, uh,

okay, boss. Toy pick of us toy,

baby, Do you want a boss toy? Yes. Okay. Thank you for my baby.

Would you like any Java coffee trippers?

Uh, Hu, I'll take a job. A copy? No drip a job.

Shoot. How do we do Job a copy or

job? Yeah. Ah, also, if you guys have any pork or pork, these poor guys, uh,

we don't store Well,

okay, then that'll be it.

Okay, I get a job, but I get ahead again. Now you're never gonna keep me saying I get job. I get ahead again because I'm always gonna be Drogba

okay? Huh? I mean, Bligh. L poor guy. You're on the phone?

Yeah, this is Lionel about

what's your name? If you're seeing job of the hut Chumbawamba mash ups Are you l poor guy? Or are you chumba job? Are you a job job? Jumbo? Our jumbo job.

I'm job something

job. What? You haven't done a no in a while. Is that you? Tried? Who? Who? All right, We're outside the house. Sell the damn car.

Yeah, I'll take I'll just take it, You know, just take it off your hands.

You know who's gonna salads here

ground? Yeah, I don't appreciate. I don't wanna negotiate. Okay, So

on the

you are, Sir, You owe me $400 for that fat suit. My sold. You effects it for $400. Guys. We got to step off.

Todd. Did you steal guys? I was just in a press conference, which I nailed. And Todd was in a fat suit pretending to be, uh, Mike. Mike,

Mike, the security guard. I don't know the facts of this, but ah,

pretend to be Mike. And he obviously stole the suit, sir. What? Where did you advertise the suit? That Todd would have seen it. Ah, Craig's Craigs Craigslist. Okay, Todd, but can't come clean. A guy came clean earlier in the press conference. It's time to come

clean. Just come clean. It's easy. It's It will make you feel so good. Todd, if you salads did not come clean these air, messy as heck, They just for once in your life tell the truth, Todd,

If I would say it was me, would you say it was one of the greatest performances of all time. Or if I would say it was Todd where the greatest performances of all time played three different characters wrote some music. A hot dog.

Hey, have I mean the most. The truest performance from Utah was you as

yourself on hold. Whatever that call was seemed you

seemed devastated. I don't know who was on the other end of it.

Well, the hardest thing to do is to play yourself, so I guess, Ah, in a way, that's a compliment. The hardest role of my life was myself. Who was on the phone? Um, it was Burger King. They want toe Make me the face of the company. I think, for their campaign.

Wow. Congratulations, Todd. Would you be so distraught?

Yeah, we could read it on your face, Todd. They were fired. Afraid of success. Hey,

guys. Is the press conference over his mike Still on it? But can we leave? You've been listening to his

mike. I don't know. It's pretty juicy stuff. This is stuff. Uh, this is stuff that I couldn't even get for my sources. And they're starving.

Sources are obsessed with juicy stuff. For sure.

I mean when they started talking about beef dippers and crunchies with sauce? I mean, all I could think about was how my sources air. Probably salivating. But then I realized my sources aren't even there, so they don't even know.

Well, what are we gonna dio? Um I mean, are we gonna wait for the players to come out?

Because the players, I think the players might already bounced. Yeah.

What do you guys going to write about this? I mean, but I know a lot happened, but what's the story? I think Rebecca's broken leg is definitely how to be the top of the sports column tomorrow. A mistake? Yeah,

that was the lead. That's what I was gonna write to. That's the good idea. Yeah. Jonathan, what were you can basketball still round as ever, Jonathan,

you gotta look, You gotta do better.

You got to do better. Jonathan. Basketball is still round as ever was gonna be your story.

Well, I mean, do you disagree?

Yes. I mean, I can't argue with the fact that those balls were around today. I mean, yeah, it So it's a factually accurate story, but I don't think your fear of publishing fake news should make you write the safest stories ever. Jonathan

never publish a lie. I will never publish a lie.

Will you just fire off your top five stories as fast as you can?

All right. Yeah. Easy. Basketball still around Has ever cheer Hurt my back today. Really specific story. Really? Revving Figured out a better way than five on five

basketball. Ju one was a sneeze sound. Your fourth story was I chew. This guy really writes from the hip. Yeah, yeah. In the last story is Gazoontite.