The Suggestion Tube with 'Drunk Mom' Marla Nuvaring (Jennie Pierson)

and Carl Thio. Let's start the show.

There's a You full bedroom said in here. Yeah, it looks like a Is that a mom? It's almost off. It's a full bedroom and actually use it gets guests Can Ipkiss. Yeah,

this is the I ke a Stanley Ipkiss. It was named after Jim Carrey's character in the Mask. Uh, you can see it's all designed very similar to

Todd. Are you living in here now? I mean, because you

are in a robe drinking. Ah, hot cup of coffee. Um, and it seems like you just rolled out of bed. You do have a shower cap on?

Yeah, Well, listen, I'm so

you know, he sleeps in the shower cap. Do you sleep in a shower cap?

Where are you heading to the shower soon. And you don't want to mess your hair up.

You guys come and sleep in the shower cap. You see, I tend thio at night. Sometimes we'll try to drink water, and, uh, in my days of sleepiness, I'll spill it all over myself. And I don't want to go back to sleep with wet hair. So I just wear the shower cap. So

but you are. You are pretty much soaked from the neck down.

Yeah, well, yeah. As you can see is an empty picture over there. That's my water pitcher that I keep next to my bed. And I tried to get a few drops every night, but I really drink that water in the days so I'll spill it all over myself.

You look dehydrated. Doesn't like getting any of the water in your mouth.

No. And I'll tell you what. I thought this company would help, but it's doing

no good grief, man. I'll tell you what I think you need to figure out something, man, because I'm worried for you. Honestly, I feel like every every time I see you look a little bit worse.

Well, I had a good thank you.

Know that a compliment? It's the opposite of a compliment. I'm worried about you.

I had a great lead on a place. It was a bachelor. Which is I guess what I am now. Uh, come on. You know, while you're accepting it, Well, I mean, at a certain point, once you it's either go to jail because of a restraining order or say the words we are divorced, you know, say the words. And

that was the ultimatum. It was gonna go to jail or just say, your

divorce. All. I broke the restraining order again. According to my wife and the law,

which was on a second date with me.

That's right. Um, I have fallen in love with your lunch lady Alter ego.

Bethany Hart Hart? Yes. And I very much While I am Bethany and very much in love with you.

Yeah, on. You know, we're really hitting it off. And for a second data tried to I know that this is not what you wanted, but I tried to get in to show you off to my ex wife, Andi. She said this is the last straw and she called the cops. And, you know, I think it's a It's unfortunate. Restraining order. How are you supposed to say 25 feet away from the woman you love? But

they're restraining Order is a 25 25 all. You could throw a rock

that far time, and I've tried.

You have a terrible and don't wear

that. I tried to pay him and we were both

throwing rocks at a favor. right way were used.

Well, I was publicly stoned by my ex wife, your boyfriend, 17 year old basketball,

biblical punishment out in the town square.

And people I thought they would come. When people started coming out. I thought they were gonna cut. They don't stop it. But they gathered around and they cheered and

they wanted a blood. It was chaos in the town.

There's some about that kid. When he's doing something, you just want to get behind it.

I refuse to remember his name.

He gave a couple people leprosy.

That's right. That's right. He did an opposite. Jesus.

That's what he was saying in the town square. Jesus, somehow guys, the hero I don't

understand. Honestly, Todd, I I mean, I I respect you more than more than a lot of recording. Oh, good God. Yeah. We've been recording this whole damn map. Shit. Well, hang on. Let me We'll get back to it. Hello, everyone. Welcome to the teacher's lounge. Uh, this is the first, best and only podcast relevant to Hamilton High school students. And the issues they experience. I have course. I'm your host, Mr Howard Levis. Joined by my three colleagues guys, Introduce yourselves.

Prime Todd Padre, theater teacher and director of the upcoming Student One Man Show Starring me

Hi, I'm previously Bill Crave E now Bethany Hart. Bill was the Spanish teacher and also the basketball coach. He was fired. I returned to the school dressed as a woman and was hired as the main lunch lady. Bethany Hart.

My name is Sam, Weatherman. I run crazy limousines, and I am the one stop shop. You got the name? You want a drink? Yeah. Crazy limousines. I would

assume that you would try to lead away from the fact that you're driving is crazy. And then there's people,

anything it should have been like straight down the middle of the road. Limousine? What do they say? Any publicity is good publicity. So, like a crazy man crashes in a crazy fashion. I said, Hey, that's one, too. And I'll make it Sam out of crazy limousines. We're taking you to the promised year. I also used to teach driver's Ed and SB.

Uh oh, yeah, that is right. You are. You were relieved of duties?

Yes, I wasn't fired. I'll still be getting paid, but I was relieved of my doing, But you work that out. What? How did you work that? Because it turns out I'm a I'm a pretty big deal, and I think it

well. You're tenured here,

right? I'm tenured here. Became tenure. Yeah, They said that everybody feels bad for me, so they can't fire me or something. I didn't really get it, but I'm happy anyway. I'm driving and crashing limousines full time

now. Yeah, well, your first ride was, ah, local country celebrity. Kenny Flip Mint. Yeah. And you didn't even get He didn't even get into the car before you crashed it.

That's right. That's right. I was backing up. In his cold is Zach. He's got a beautiful house. Beautiful house over on Stanford Ranch Road. And I was backing into his colder sack. Now wait. What? Were you just starting to back up,

or did you make your way to his house? In reverse?

Itself is a big problem. I accidentally went their nose in, realized there's no way I

out of here. I'm backing out of his cold a sack and I clip three cars and so I make the turn and then I'm backing in, and I clipped the other three you just

would be able to get back

counted on your hand. It looked like you counted more than three. But then you decided to say three.

Oh, sorry. I hit three sets of three cars. Nine. First, side 12 on the second. Anyway, crazy limousines come and get him. We have popcorn in the back. And I saw you driving

by the other day very scarily in reverse. And there's no, um,

was there wearing a mask wearing a mask. Okay, you were wearing Oh, this is Thursday, then? Yeah, yeah. What was that mask of? Huh? Oh, it's It's like a human face, But it's bigger. Yeah, so it looks really crazy. Looks like a guy with the head that wears like a size 12 had.

It's upsetting. It's like a Ron Perlman kind of

way, but there's no

receptacles for this popcorn in the back. It's just loose in the back of the limousine.

Like I said, we have popcorn in the back. Bring your own tub. That'll be good for anybody who gives it

a shot on prom night this year. Uh, you know, uh, we say stay safe. And in this case. I think that means don't drive drunk and also maybe choose a different means of transportation. But

our ticket sales for the prom

sold out, sold out. Miss Holloway, though, is currently in a coma. From what I understand stampede it was a stampede because they had to re issue tickets due to some mistakes that were made in the first round on. Everybody was going to get their new tickets. Mistake was an address mistake that was addressed to Todd's. Todd's play, right? Todd has fine strips,

eyes that So you know, this dies. All these

problems take it. Well, as you all know for some idiot schedule prom and the same night as the opening night of my one man show, The Story of my life Todd, Padre Colon, a one man show and then close Colon, which is starting, is also co

starring your your class right where it should be for them. Yeah,

that's right. The ah lot of theater students and parents were a little upset that the students were not able to act in the place. I made them trees and that was upsetting everybody. So I said all 45 of them could open for more than five minutes Now combined E. Okay. A lot of people are saying, you know what? That stand up, not theater. So I said, Well, what the hell do you want from me? So I'm letting these kids write up a show, and they can do it. They get five minutes before my play there, my opening act, and they can write a one act and do whatever the hell they want with their words. It's ah, I'm really getting out a lot of stuff about my marriage. Ah, a lot of things I'm going through. It's all based on truth and reality. And I really hold up a mirror

I read in the paper. There was, Ah, in the crime reports, it looks like your your daughter, uh, uh reported to the police that you tortured her for information about your play.

Well, that's right. As you know, as you know, my daughter is cash poor.

She has a lot of assets that she's trying to sell around town. That's right.

And I ended up, uh, we got a Diet Coke spill, uh,

all over your new bad. At least it didn't get

on your hair.

Oh, yeah, I see it now. If you all have been wearing shower caps is wouldn't be an issue. I could help you there. What's your flannel? Oh, Jesus.

Now that the planet was already soaked with

a lot of Diet Coke already, it looks like Is that something you regularly do? Powered all of the time, All the time. I'm a spiller.

Oh, no, that's not a flannel. That's a Levi's. That's a Levi's denim. Yeah, he was made to look like a flannel. Different shades of denim. And we're wiping this up

way. Gonna let the cat on cat out of the booth. Craig, how are you? Thank you for bringing in those paper towels. It's just a Bethany. It's Lady.

Thanks for bringing in the paper towels. Craig, Lunch Lady Bethany is doing the podcast now instead of Bill Craig.

Yes. I'm not him. Goodbye.

That was close. Close call.

I'm pretty good at this character. It's pretty seamless now. Yeah. Now

you went into it very quickly. Uh,

Todd, thank you

so much for writing me into your play. Will you talk about how he tortured his daughter? Yes. I'm sorry. I forgot about that.

it's We almost got out of it. So yeah. My Well, here's the thing. Is the Geneva Difficult convention really have strange and definitions of torture. And I don't think what I did was torture her. I put her in a well lit room and I filled it with smoke, and I and I blasted.

You mean you mean like, uh, fog like fog

machine? No, no, I was smoking packs of cigarettes and fill in the room up with the tobacco smoke. And you, uh, your lung cancer survivor? Well, so far, I'm a survivor. Who knows? Uh,

it's a pretty bleak Alec.

Well, you know, you don't smoke your whole life and then get cocky. Uh, So anyway, I filled the room with smoke, and as you said, everyone knows about this. But then I blasted for 10 hours straight. The song toxicity by system of it down full volume because I think everyone's gonna side with me on here in a divorce, the child has to choose a parent. You have to choose which one they're siding with. Because things were as quickly as Boston. Yes. And, you know, like my daughter was leaning towards deciding on her mother. And for me, that seems like the wrong decision. So

I was proceeding. She said, I'm living with Mom. Please, please, please. I'm living with my

God. Those proceedings for real embarrassing for me. I gave her a microphone to Well, they give her a microphone and she ended up doing about a 10 minute roast on a

really good deeds. Absolute. She's she's live close to you. We heard some stuff about you that were deep Psyche.

Yeah, my daughter. I see my daughter.

Most of it

was how you sit down when you pee,

which was really killing, which is not true. I lay down,

you lay down and

you make a puddle in the bathroom. She had photos, videos. That's right. I don't think that's emasculating women sit down to pee. The fact that I lay down means I'm not like a woman. Well,

I get up is high as I can. You know about me. You have a ladder in your bathroom.

Just add on top of the seating, pee straight down.

I sure do. I used that ladder that I used to cut down the state championship net with and I p Hi

stole that night, didn't you? I did. You could that net down after losing the state? That dripping

and it did not long doing in the state championship. Yeah, your team that season, I zero wins. Or when, Um uh When the fighting Bibles were accepting the state championship on and I I cut down the net.

Now, Mr Levis, my hope is that when you were elected mayor will loosen the terms of what torture is for more leniency, More torture available? Well, no, it's just you can't torture someone you love. It's impossible. And I love my daughter and I was trying to help her, and I think that that is what's getting lost.

I don't understand why you were torturing her information about your play, but you don't have the script.

That's right. It doesn't make a ton of sense. It

does not. But what I was under the

impression of was that you were trying to get information about your ex wife's motivation for the divorce

is what I was expecting. I would have made more sense, but no, I want her. I tortured her and I wanted her to read my play, I say, and tell me what was what what's going

on in it? What am I? What am I

saying? Because I am just stream of consciousness

that you wanted

to be an acting coach for you. So you tortured her. That's right.

Way saying Yes,

you tortured her. You I'm saying Tortured by your definition

is your your If I understand your philosophy, it's sort of like the way that farm farm owners can have their Children work before they're 15. You can have your 12 year old son work on your farm, even though it's illegal for people under age of 15 to work. If they're family, it's not. The rules are a little more lenience. You're saying you can't torture somebody if you love

him, and I think going a little further with that, it would be like if that farm owner had their kid read a play that they wrote and then tell them what was in the play but tortured the kid. Really? Yeah,

I think it's hard to see

your own flaws sometimes, you know. I mean, it's hard to see when you're doing something wrong,

which Mr Loves you are

up in the polls, right. Despite the Anthonys Wiener scandal at the moment. Yeah, it's looking. I have a theory. Really? Let the incumbent mayor have it in that. In that debate, that was a great debate. Congratulate. Thank you so much. You guys screamed at her a

great debate. You screamed at her and she politely responded with good point salient points. And you lost

it. And the her we're referring to is actually the mayor's wife, Right? Because our incumbent mayor is a man. That sure, but his his wife. He let his sweet wife have it

demanded to debate his wife and

his strategy. You demanded. It is like that. And he he tried to show up to the debate. But you made sure security would not allow him on sight.

Right? What? What were you screaming? He she doesn't need his strength.

Uh What? You heard it. You heard it, right? She doesn't need his strength, you know. I

know. See, I'm the kind

of person who I believe that regardless of gender, everyone is equal in terms of their capacity to progressive, right? I listen to women the same way I listen to men Okay on. Everybody knows the mayor's points of view, right? Everybody knows that. But if he dies, who becomes mayor? His wife? That's the way it works. A rule that s o I want. She dies. It's It's with Children. It's sort of Ah, you know, aggressive away. Yeah, the way it works in our city, it's It's sort of like a monarchy. So

I just wanted to get her philosophies

out there on the table. You know what I mean? And it's not my fault that she couldn't. Defender said there was a while where there was a, uh, docks in who was our mayor for about six years. About 10 years after family died in a plane crash. Yeah, and their pet had to take over.

Thank God they left someone at home, huh? Someone you don't want to travel with. Your family, that town, the town could have really gotten under there, but thank God we had the wise leadership of Perry the docks.

That Doc son was the first mayor to get us back into the black. Absolutely, uh,

here losing money, hand over fist with all these humans

and the docks and came in and invested in pets dot com. This was 10 years ago after pets dot com and gone down, but a new one head. Yeah, well, we all know the story,

and you're gonna have,

uh, Sadie the doc sins, son, as your running mate, is that correct? Yeah, that's a huge. A lot of people say it's a bad idea to have the runt dots and be your running mate. But I said, you know what? That Dotson has had the hardest life of anybody. It is his intestines are outside of it. Has it has an inguinal hernia?

Oh, yeah, E. I don't think it's gonna make it through the

campaign, but I love that you're dragging it. Our symbol, though it's a symbol

that doctors in the Bob Dole of dogs run for election.

It is, Yeah, I think it's a symbol, you know, if that dog can fight each day, we can all fight each day, and that's the reason I think I'm ahead in the polls. Is preaching a message of continuing to fight to make our town better than when it was yesterday. I think

a lot of your success is that you come from money and people like that. People like someone rich, and they like that. You're willing to yell at anybody. I mean politics, not about who's the best it's about Who's the richest in the loudest Donald. Yeah, yeah, I think you're really doing that. And you're really showing this town that what we deserve tohave is our mayor and I for I, for one, am excited for all the new life

because you're yelling and screaming your kind of man of the people. You know what I mean? Voices were so important. So not only is

this town filthy and horny, it is angry. Yeah, and I'll be honest. You know, a lot of people come through the school and they say

How, Mr Mr Levis, he's, uh he's a pretty mild mannered fella. Has he get up

there on stage and just turned into this sort of dictatorial kind of, uh, you know,

I've heard you with the switch. I do, I do. And I've got to

flip a switch to flip. And I do. Yeah. And maybe that's from, you know, the years of competition that were bred in my family up on the years of sort of fighting against who I am t live a meager lifestyle. I did finally buy a new house. I got rid of the tiny house, and it is huge on. And it's what I would like to call. And what Guinness Book of World Records has decided is the largest house in America. Wow. Thank you very much, love. Yeah, Guinness, I said. And you know the email you were sending things to. It's the right one. It is.

And is it true that

while they were there measuring your house, you also you also won for stinkiest

bathroom? You want three? Forget. So, where's that day, didn't you?

Yeah. Yeah. Stinking bathroom. Stinking bathroom was one shortest backyard grass was number two and

meanest to the Guinness. Important?

Yes, Yes. Uh, yeah. So what? They were they given you awards And you were what? Just screaming out of Savage. G said They

said, Listen, we get those fat twins on bikes really gave it to us, But you be a beating them on this one, right?

Yeah. And so is it true? Now, this may be embarrassing. Is it true that you tried to also in fattest twins on bikes and build a doll?

Uh, you build a bad paper shade all of yourself. I did, you know, And a lot of people would say, Wow, your artistic creativity is pretty incredible. Mr. Levis.

A lot of people if you had seen the process. I sat in

my living room and I covered myself and paste. I sliced up a newspaper, but

we saw the live stream. Yeah. Thank you. Oh, thank you so much. You didn't hit any other. You didn't hit any likes

or anything like that on Facebook live. I just caught in the town square where it was up on the big screen. That's good that

I saw it. I just didn't like it.

That's upstanding. Uh, hey, I sat in my living room and created a paper mache a version of myself to try to rival the fattest twins. Some Plexico ALS. And And they found you out. Or did you get it? I was not big enough, is what they said, Okay. Leo was made myself. Anyway, this guy's way.

Want to do a quick segment?

Er, this week, everybody. We actually have had a suggestion box out on the front lawn of the school trying to get suggestions of things we get just a loose box laying out on the lawn with a little sign attached to it that says suggestions, comments, concerns Andi,

Hold on the top and the bottom of the box. So it's been a wild actually get a suggestion to stick. We keep getting suggestions and find them. Another place is more of a tube, but this is the car kids have been defeating out. They call it the wind tunnel. So nothing stayed in that thing. But luckily, we did

have a few things wind up in there. We're just going to take a take a moment to address these comments. Very drafty in the

wait to put one in there, and it was immediately whipped out.

Well, I can address that. I was asked to make it, and I made it out of one of those tornado money machines. I just I cut the bottom out of one of those that'll D'oh!

It's honestly, the worst thing you could make you say Wow, sorry, sorry. Paper out of itself.

Okay. Be careful, Ugo. You're getting cut from my play with that kind of time.

Wait, wait. This is a segment

we're just gonna call very simply

the suggestion buns. Eso this. This segment is called tube. All

right, well, I got one right here. Here's one. This one is addressed to lunch. Lady Heart. That's May. It says, uh, lunch lady Heart. I've noticed lately there's been a lot of beard hairs in the pizza. Is there a way to not do that on? Then It says, sincerely, a concerned pizza eater. Well,

um, I as you guys know, my beard grows very quickly, and I don't have, you know, it's it's back at a stubble by the time lunch happened. So I do have to shave back there where we make the food, right? And I I Honestly, I try to, um

You know, I

try to blend the hairs into the pizza, um, and really smash them down once they get in it. So I am

trying. That seems like a good enough answer

for me. Yeah, well, and you know, if you were one of those Costco beard, beard nets would know you were a man

way. Really Don't like the hair and the pizza. This is a ridiculous question. Me? If you really don't like to hear in the pizza than wear a hair net

over your That's a great solar.

Siphon the pizza through a hair net. That's that's very good. Also, I don't mean

thio cause any stink here, but Well, you

are. Yeah, it seems like you brought some of the bathroom stinky

bathroom. But this is what I'll say to this. Okay? People there too. Freaking concerned with public health, You know what I mean? Like like

it's in this in this day and age, like medicine is

enough. All right, we got we got plenty of good medicine, a little hair, whatever weird disease you're gonna get for me in the man's hair. You're gonna be able to cure simply by just going to the dang on, doctor. Okay, So

complain about eating hair. Y'all.

don't

You're lucky you even have food. You know, there's people

around this world who haven't had dinner,

all right? Someone's on their political. So by this was a huge part of

the day. I mean, his his debate everybody to deserve dinner. I honestly don't know how how you quantify this information. How you found so many people that don't have dinner. I simply I sent out a in email blast Thio, All of our constituents. Everyone here and said Ask all your family who ate dinner tonight and then they got about You

gotta get a bunch of people and I learned a lot. Now, uh, one of the suggestions

that one here, I got one. This one is for Todd. Padre says, Todd, that's me. I owe anonymous tip. Interesting. I think I've seen the Wimberley is in the creek also. Did you know that they've been chipped? Local vet has their location.

Okay, well, as your anonymous, as you all know, I'm producing a documentary called Finding The Member Leaves About So the twins of the Wimberley family that supposedly died in my theater class and I think they faked their deaths. And recently, Maur twins from the family have died. I think they're all faking their deaths, and this is a hot tip. So the wen believes they're chipped like a dog on. All I got to do is go to the vet. This is good. I'm going to get my my director, and then I'm gonna get a camera and I'm gonna go. And where they say, the quarry.

They said they agreed scene in the creek.

Okay, Well, time to get my floaties on and I'm gonna go in there and find the thing.

And that Greeks, pretty shallow. I don't think you need floaties. Well,

we'll see if I have to pee in there. I've got something to hold me up on. Land down, I Anybody else? Let's let's keep using suggestion to for hot tips on finding the Wimberley. So I think that's very helpful for May. And also any tips on how to get my wife back. Let's go ahead and throw those in the tube. Thank you very much.

I got one here. It's for you. Mr. Weatherman says Mr Weatherman crashed a limo into my restaurant. Just left it there. Can you tell him to call me and then as a number?

No, don't tell me. Just let's not deal with

that. You're sorry?

I wish I had more information here. I wish I knew which restaurant it was. We could maybe help a little bit more.

All right. I know. I just said, you know, put some direct help for me, which is not a suggestion, but that's not a damn suggestion right now. Don't just tell me what you want me to dio.

What's the sooner suggestion is? They want me to call them and apologize. I believe that

that suggestion would be Can you come get the limousine that you left crashed into their restaurant out of there

s K. Don't they want business? Do they not want business? There's already a limo there. Now we're just waiting for the date.

It did cause a bit. There was a lot of news coverage on this crash and they gave the owners of the restaurant a lot of sympathy. Thank you.

What is this? The Sabara? It's a borrow on 12th

number. What's the phone? I can't say it out loud.

Or is this the food writers on

13? Based on the number, I think it might be the Fuddruckers.

Oh, was that the Allies become? Was it the road fuckers? Fuckers. I love that themed restaurant. All about hating Paul run in his family, Dad. So specifically themed. But it's very fun. I like when you fart on the clueless poster. Yeah, that's my favorite, but what a

great activity to do at a restaurant. It's like Cracker Barrels, little Peg game. Except there's this fart on Paul Rhodes. Hold on. What have you been doing it, Cracker barrel? I've been playing a little peg game where you try to get one peg left. And that's when the oldest waitress in the restaurant pegs you in the bathroom. Uh, that's

what you've been doing.

Uh, you gotta go for it. That's

what I play. Move on. I'm always an ignoramus.

That's right. Afterwards, they give you a rating for how good you were getting, Peg. And if you

do, you always get paid very poorly.

Like getting your Amos. And then you come back and you gotta stand for the rest of the meal. You eat your corn bread because that's all I order. There's all right. So anybody rod fuckers, we love your business, but we're not going to call you and apologize. And weatherman's not gonna come get

you. I don't know if I

have a suggestion here. It says Mr Levis

in your biology class, could you

stop showing us body parts of yours when you talk about them in

the textbook? Oh, come on.

What do you own? I mean,

you're doing that

core. I mean, yes. What? Which body parts. That they have a

problem with? I mean, I show him my show him everything. It's not

like I'm just I'm guessing Dick. And it says here these air bullet points, your dick, your bottle. That's it. What would they rather see? A picture? Just some random person. I'm gonna show

him a picture of a dick and a but

I don't think they want to see a picture either. I think they want to see maybe just like a got a text from Amir. Let him look at their own dicks and butt holes, huh? I'm sure they've seen him.

Now, we all know this is non sexual because it's public information that you can't get aroused anymore. But I still think you should now have this could be perceived that you're showing kids your body parts like that. I mean, I'm all about breaking down boundaries, but if my if my lovely daughter was in that class, II would be real peeved that she had to look at your dear your b hole,

even knowing that

I can't get sexually aroused anymore that I had my libido chemically killed, even knowing that that's right. And I think that

you drinking that cocktail? Of course I

am. That's the right thing because you sent too many pictures of Anthony's wiener toe. Dont young way.

It's the only way that I can stay sane last. What is, uh, drink chemical cocktail that gets rid of his libido? Yeah, It was part of his campaign manager's idea. Get matters. You Listen, listen, You can't be all horny. All major and save. Yeah, He said you can't be all horny. You know how many people in this town

saw a picture of Anthony's wiener? You were. You're something to a lot of PM. Yeah, you were during ah, basketball game this past week doing what the students were calling the dirty dog out in the middle of the floor. Yeah, that was filthy. It was you on your stomach. Um, I'm sorry. It was called The Cry Baby was you later did the dirty dog. It started out with a cry, baby. Was you sucking your thumb Wang going wang Well, and then just kind of humping the ground, huh? I didn't like that one bit. Well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone, but it sounds like people like like the my point of view around here. I'm up three points in the polls, and that's, uh, that's more than the margin of error. So what I'll say is, I think the thing is everybody was distracted from your cry, baby because we won the first basketball game of the season. Coached by yours truly. Whoa.

But you were out that night, right? Well, for most of the game,

you were not know I was the coach that took over. Um, year old Rego took over, right? That's correct. Uh, Bethany took over halfway through the game because the coach got sick and we won. Unbelievably, we won by 60 points. Being coached by me as a woman was a woman is a great coach. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, I was hoisted out of there on everyone's shoulders. It was a really highlight. My wig came off. Everybody said, What's that? And I said nothing and put it back on. Well, that's great. That's really truly great. Now I thinkit's time for us to introduce our guest for for today. Uh, we're glad to have a parent on the show today. Everybody, a new perspective. We haven't had a perspective of apparent law, actually, ever s O. Today we'd love to take a moment to welcome Ah, parent of one of our students. Mrs Marlon Maneuvering. Marla, how are you?

Good morning. 7 11 cup full. Oh, boy. Yeah. I got my salty Greyhound.

What is that?

Oh, it's, um Let's see. We got vodka. We got Epsom salt. Uh, it's a little drop of grapefruit juice and my secret ingredient. A touch of saline solution.

Okay, so more and more.

I got news for you. Salt makes me tick, You know what I mean?

So you are. Your intention is completely dehydrate yourself.

If I drink a lot of salt, then that makes him allowed me allowed to drink more. Do you know what I mean? And what else is fun?

No. Marla, I recognize you now seeing you. And I saw that. I thought I don't know this person's name. You kind of all No, You on campus. And I hope this isn't offensive to

you. Nothing gets what? Life's too short.

That's a great attitude. Because we all know you was drunk. Mom on

campus. Hey, fun mom. Drunk. Mom. Well, fun drunk, right? I don't get sad sometimes, but I love a

lot of time,

but I'm only alone when I get sad. When I'm in public drunk, I'm having fun. That's right.

You you like to throw a lot of parties?

Oh, I love a party. Uh, because you know, my husband just let me redo the kitchen and now and let you Well, you know what I mean. You know how it goes in the marriage. You know, I don't I have sex with them once a year, and he lets me remodel something. That

of a one for one trade.

I don't understand numbers. Well, good. Okay. So anyway, I remodeled. What are those called? An open

open floor plan?

Floor plan. Kitchen for parties.

And what you did was you took everything out of the kitchen and you just made it a big bar.

Yeah, uh, it's a bar with one toaster oven because I gotta have my pigs in a blanket. I'll tell you what you

are. You are just a ball of fun. You're a blast. Have

a big ball of fun. I just got my husband one big ball because he only has one ball. D'oh! My husband has one ball. Well, yeah, Huh?

Go ahead. That's why.

That's why I only, um, look at it once a year. You kind

of famous for telling some pretty, pretty slow, deep family secrets to anybody on

campus. Give me one salty greyhound, and I'll tell you, it's a secret revealed.

Will you have the most Children at this school? Correct.

I have 18 Children. Uh, then I have seven new Barings currently wedged inside of my six. But your run of them work.

Your last name is New Marina's. Well, did you decide to change your last name? Started

that correct guilty accusation. Okay, Well, you know, it's funny, though when I say guilty. Does that make sense?

Oh, yes.

You know, it's funny.

Sorry I missed the joke.

Okay, that's fine. I have more. Do you want to hear him?

Favorite joke. So, Seo, that's good.

Yeah, that's good. Right? This is good. Okay,

so gets OK. So if I were to say to you Hey. Hey. How you doing? What would you What's your favorite joke back?

Uh, two sheets to the wind. Todo mi Ah,

joke is something with a set up in a punch line. It's like Yume or just say ce whatever. Asteroid. Someone asked you a question catchphrase.

Well, I got news for you. There's no way I'm gonna do what you want.

Was that a joke?

Yeah,

I don't think I got it, but it was funny.

Thank you, Wayne. He's the nice one, I think.

Yeah. Yeah. So what do you driving these days?

Oh, let's see. I got my previous, you know, but I don't drive it because I like to waste gasoline. Thes days. I made

you pouring it out in your front

yard big time these days. I'm riding around on the back of my kid. Uh, Juan Carlos. Whoa, no, He was named after the bachelor. Correct? Yeah. You know, a 1008

right around on your eight year old son's back.

Oh, you mean what year did he come out? Sure. I don't

know. You ride around on your son's back. You have so many vehicles at your house just constantly running to burn. You could use any of these vehicles. I saw you have a boat out in front of your house just running on Leo.

Oh, I have one vote, and it's always on and I also have seven horses and one very big dawg. What did those called those Harry Big dogs

know you have a bear.

That's why you tried to scrape my face of Yes. Oh, my God. Yesterday, my daughter,

My eyes. Are you walking your bear the other day? That's a more fire inside and down.

It's funny,

you know? It's a bear.

Well, you told me just now

it's a very funny is funny you If it was just a big dog

now, funny and up sometimes that bear punches my daughter lovey dovey in the face,

lovey Bea was after the bachelorette. Direct.

Yeah, the teacher.

So I wish I knew more about that show.

I Well, I wish I could tell you, but I fall asleep most times.

So you have 18 kids. You're very active in the school. You've obviously been around many times. You know, most of the

teachers, you know, campaign to be the Pete, the president of P. T. A. Every year for the past 10 years.

Well, I think that the p t. A could use a little fun and charm, and I have both

I don't disagree with

you. I think p T. A. Meetings are pretty dry, which is why parents don't want to get involved.

Thank you. I'm glad you brought that up.

You did run a P t a meeting once they let you run it. Um, and most of it was just you cooking bacon wrapped hot dogs

in one of those things outside of a

club. Cut. You hear any complete?

Yes. The thing is that place of birth. Well, you burnt down the common room here. The school.

We can't believe any. You can't believe anything you read way. Saw it. Anything you see? And what? The only thing you can believe me. I made bacon wrapped hot dogs. I made bacon wrapped crescent rolls. You know, those I wrapped my This was fun. I wrapped my head in bacon and tried to put it in the oven. And everyone's going now, please. After

the bear attack, and also you baked your

head very scraped up.

I was going to say you're beautiful. I mean, if you ever need, I just think, you know, I just felt the thing here. I

don't know. Sam's

eating bacon off of the back of her neck.

Sexually. Not doesn't taste very good. It's pretty raw still.

I've had it drive myself wrapped up

for seven days. You smelled elicit a biblical thing Are

seven days wrapping yourself

up for seven days?

No, the Bible. I read one Bible one time

way, Dru. Literature bombed

the Bible, but you read a buy

one time in a hotel room in Wisconsin. Wait, no, wasn't Wisconsin. It was I was in Napa Valley. I was on a diet.

Did that Bible just have a lot of suggestions for what? To eat in the neighborhood

way gave me the WiFi password on DDE. Well, that's all I can remember. I think it did have some very pretty pictures of the bathroom. Well, my husband is Andy CAPP. So we have to get the big room when

we go to a hotel. That's right. That's nice. You get the big room.

Yeah, but you know, I

mean, were you mad when Mr

Levis tipped your husband over at the basketball game?

No. Mad. I wish he would have. You would have killed him. I don't want him. Thank you.

I got to live outside. Neither one have the keys.

I can't tell me something. Is there popcorn in the limo?

Oh, absolutely. Bring on top.

Then I consider me

pops. I usually don't get this kind of

response from women. Not at all.

Well, you gotta get out more, I think. Really? Yeah. I

have been saying in why lately You

know where you should go. T g I Friday's

These two are getting very close to each other.

Well, hey, come on. Hey, guys,

come on. Still like us? They're not very close. Very close to making kissing sounds at each other. She's eating some bacon off of her neck there. Turned back to back. Now just meeting now. They're squatting down using each other's bag. Scratch

it. Oh, boy, That's satisfying.

Really have a secret. What's this? Sex?

I think I'm pregnant. I know my I'm

pregnant with emotion right now. I've never been.

Thank you.

Wow. Okay, we're trying to keep a podcast going, and some of us are sad and single and don't wanna watch this

single here. You single Believe it.

I am single. Unfortunately, I think we all are

single. You're single, but

you're dating. I am dating. I am.

And I am currently in love with Mr Craigie's alter ego, Miss? Uh,

yeah, Dating your ex? Yes.

I thought that was a different person.

No, no, no. I'm

Bill. I'm just dressed as a woman. I'm now the basketball coach as Bethany Hart. I'm the lunch lady slash basketball coach.

Great wig work and one to my bear. I want to trick people into what thinking is G.

Just you want to put a human wig on a male bear, so people think it's a female bear. I don't think that you could just tell them it's a

female bear. A lot of people are not familiar with their genitalia.

I have a

question for you, Miss New Marine.

Uh, ask away. I haven't opened.

But how did you

get your bear?

Oh, well, I went. You want the long or the short story

further apart now. Come here. Come over here