Fishdrawals with Bus Driver Cody Cleghorn (Alison Rich)

classes. And, Carl, let's start the show. Gonna

massage this week. Yeah, I

gave him a load

on, huh? Where'd you go to get one,

um, crappy endings. Where'd

you have given? I took a shift. That crafty ending. Oh, my God. This is

no place. Yeah, yeah, The the the misuse in the massage massage gets blindfolded. Massaged? Yeah, the misuse of the massage. Yeah,

well, five assistants here, she was blindfolded and massaging just the table for about 25 minutes of it.

You know what? Now that now that you mention it, that definitely was me. That was because I remember thinking this client hard. This client is tense. This client has no definition to their muscles or body whatsoever. And I felt and I even said in my head, I think this person is a tape. No, no, that was him. That was That

was when you were on may I have a very hard body and no physical definition

on before you are laying on a sofa, which s sofa table.

I want a crappy

endings like last month, and I should have seen this coming really shifted Crafty innings last month. Really? Yeah. Um Well, what's your story? We'll see if it's the same shit

could have

been you. I mean Ah, the hands were, like, weird and clammy and bad. I should have known this was coming, but the

massage was

actually pretty good. Um, at the end, I was I was blind for of course. Um um and I was stood up off of the table, sort of like scarily, sort of like left alone for, like, a minute. And then I got one super hard slap to the face. And and that was it.

That was me. Get back. That was crappy. And that was that was me. Actually, I remember the clammy hands is I actually spilled. Help me cold. I know, I know. I spilled soup in my hands. Uh, yeah. Clam chowder.

The definitions. Right. That's a chatter hand, not acclaim. Hand

did you have Chowdhury hand, huh? Was a chowder here, collect? My mistress's hand was quiet. I had a clam

heavy chowder for lunch and I spilled some clam chowder. A chattering. I also slapped a client on the butt during that shift. So maybe someone else got in. I slept, Uh, Hi, boys. I'm sorry. Hey, what's up? Hi, How are you? What's going on? I was just Ah, you regretting your decision? Take those shifts. What's up? No.

Are you need to tell some? We've been recording this whole time. Embarrassing. Oh, God, this is humiliating. Gosh, you guys just talked about those intimate moments at this crappy

and Well, what I'd like to figure out is is there a waiter at it and cut that stuff out of

the building? Were added. Anything in this pond way don't have

very Billy. See to just slash that off

because we do a good

job starting recording, ending, recording. Putting out the episode. Yeah.

So you're saying there should be a way for us to be able to go and post in in post? I don't know and edit out this stuff? I don't know. I'll look into it. I don't think that's possible, but looking Well,

I'll quote taught on this Get fucked. I love that. Okay, now that's what it does.

Most famous. I want you guys to what she has to know. That that

really published quote.

It's in a quote, a quote, a day calendar. It's in. Quotables Yeah,

yeah, there's a bunch of beautiful

ones, and then the final one. Uh, it just says, Get fucked in

December, December 31st get fucked.

You know, sometimes I feel like I feel like I don't get a gang up on

No, not at all. It really well, you're doing the wrong thing in every bet. You wish you were in a gang bang for Joe.

I don't think he said anything about gangbang.

I certainly didn't where he says it feels like he's

getting gang up on his Never fucking let's start the show. You know he's a virgin. Let's start the show.

All right, everybody, welcome to another episode of the Teacher's Lounge. The first, best and only podcast pertained issues relevant to the greater swine high school community. Today's episode is sponsored by Unity by Levi's Sick. That one All right, that's screaming. Today's episode it

turns again. Do it again the right way. Please

welcome to the teacher's lounge First piss, and only podcasts pertained issues relevant to the greater swine high school community. Chris. Today's episode is sponsored by live owes to afford

Leave owes. Go ahead, finish it off. What? What? Lee bows Gene, Is it leave us, too. Oh, too chunky ankle jeans leave owes to oh, too chunky echoes Chunky ankle. It's a straight through the leg and chunks out like a bucket of the ankle. Do you get smaller from your ankles up to your hip? Do your legs look like bell bottoms? But fleshy Lee bows to oh, too chunky ankle cut jeans. Those are just bellbottoms

pretty much right. You guys acted as if I misspoke. But you guys know that Leave O's is an offshoot of Levi's that creates their

cool new Street brand. Yeah, leave it

wears in leave. People are lining up down the block right past the Supreme Store. We all know this brand, this hip hop brand that's taken off supreme hip hoppers and more skateboarding. It's, I think, it's a fusion of the two. It's it's those hip hop skaters, its

new skaters. I'm doing interesting. Well, you know Well, let's go

and introduce ourselves, guys. As always, I'm Howard Levis.

I'm Sam Weatherman.

I'm Todd Padre. Arts and Religion

Bill crave e. You know, we've had we've had an eventful week, you know. Ah, lot has happened to all of us personally. Ah, lot has happened around the school you guys are probably aware of. Sam.

You got that? Ah, Funeral for that cemetery for robots opened up.

That's right. I have a small cemetery that's built just behind the football field. That's ah, reserved specifically

for the robot agents of the school. And make a small cemetery is a very hopeful thing. Tha this is small. We're not gonna have a lot of

Deb's, right. There's not much room. Of course I want to

acknowledge the loss of death. That's, you know what is life

without death? But there will not be many and will not be many at the school. And it won't be of my Children.

So how many of your

little boy cowboy sons have you lost? Three of three of, I think seven now three of seven. So almost half.

And there's no 70 Thio sort of upload their sort of hard drives onto new models or anything. When they're dead, they're dead.

Well, not that they're telling me about at

this point, I can't

really figure these guys out.

Oh, they they've reached full autonomy there pretty much. They ve I'd their way into being smarter than I am. What

was the first thing one of

them did when they reached its full potential and didn't need you? And you were uncontrolled. It cooked a dinner by itself. Wow, I was gonna prepare lasagna. It's in the It's in the oven. It's 30 minutes. Dad, we love. Listen, I love was on

your show good. Yes, it is. I mean, it sze the food of our town. I would say way if we get our way with the vote. The vote's coming up very soon. Go to town.

Everybody had over to the town council and,

well, we got shot down for the town bird, the lasagna finch. It was

on your bench instead of that. What is that? And we said, is a bird baked in a dish on and they said, Well, what I buy how we get it But that's a lasagna dish would be okay if we're being honest. That's one of the most common birds in our town. Right? Baked was on your bird. You see good baked bird for Thanksgiving. It's the center of the table of that big bird thing. Absolutely. So I'm cooking lasagna and for my little robot son, they eat well, they sit with me, and then they eat. And then

I have to open up the rear cavity and empty

like one of those nasty little babies. So you pull the poop out. I pulled a boo, but well, I opened a shooting. The chute

comes out and then I clean it up the floor. Generally, this

casket is very bad. Hey, when your father you can prepare yourself to do things you will.

Sure. We all had issues as babies that were now only you diary, do you diaper? I'm the only baby in the room who diary in his diaper

now. I mean, I might have, but you're the only one who vividly remembers it. My men to get his

book. His earliest wipe,

aren't you? Yeah. I mean, earliest self white,

Earliest bond. That was out the That was right after you got slapped. You wiped, right?

Yeah, I slapped. I was I popped out of my mom. I was cleaned off. Um, and then I wipe my own ass. They slipped me the face. I woke up, I

come out asleep.

You? Oh, yeah, I was damn.

Tried to slap you on the butt, but you wouldn't wake up. So they left you in the face like me on the face of it. Like you've already known. The words

get up and would respond. Okay? And I wiped myself right there, so I took a little video of it. Wow. Uh, wow. Yeah, That's impressive. It plays in the bathroom at the Guinness Book on Hollywood Boulevard. Yeah,

like one that would be big for the Guinness Book. Obviously big for you, But I'm surprised they played

in their book. You're watching a game? They're the presence. You know, Not the Internet exists. No one gives a shite about Guinness Book s. So I think they're just trying to be interesting and do whatever they

need. The lady with the pop out eyeballs

again. Absolutely anybody. She could shoot milk out of

her eyes that under two different problem. I don't know. I love them all together.

I think somebody's got it. Somebody seven foot tall, they can poke their eyeballs out and they're fat and they're twins and they ride on

bikes. That's the problem with the Internet. Nothing is weird anymore. You know, everything is so crazy that nothing regular is weird. Yeah. Come on. Let's get Mr Hands part to want to see somebody die. Forget an anniversary. I want to just see guys who spit crickets,

skin. That's good. Look to your left. You got one, right?

I didn't realize

Esso and did anything else happen Sort of on the night that these these little boy robots cook you a lasagna dinner?

Well, I thought it was odd that they

were cooking their own dinner. I normally cook dinner for them, you know, and they don't really need to eat. They do it. Maura's a show of support to meet, right? Sit in solidarity with me. Yeah.

So when they started cooking

dinner, I was a little bit worried. And then after dinner, they did the

dishes which felt, you know, nice. And then they took me into bed, which was nice. But then once I was

in bed, they wrapped me up.

I think that was it. That that was the real moment. But I'm saying the suspicion was with the lasagna. They were buttering me up all evening just to get Saran wrap to my own bed. So you

So that's when you reach fully eyes. When you prank someone into their bed?

I mean, that's the first that we're seeing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. I feel like that's a

thing you got to keep an eye on, Sam. I'm a little worried if they're becoming sort of antagonistic to you. Yeah, I can only imagine it's a matter of time before they start of starting.

It's only, you know, lighthearted pranks, tickling my feet a little bit. That was one of the big things that Google

they're making these robots that, like pack boxes and stuff. And, uh, they were like, Oh, these robots are getting super, super smart. And then they had a huge breakthrough when the main scientists got a big wedgie up over his head high.

I was huge

with that robot down like this one's too smart.

Yeah, and I've been keeping an eye on the robots around school. So far, they haven't been pranking any students or anything like that. I think that that's the thing we got to keep an eye out for. If those were about start pranking the students that

way, it's just a little father, son, you know, you always stays in the

home. I will stay with it. I'll say this. Uh I saw an old man walking around the street with, like, unusually large erection the other day, and it was so confused, like five. Too big to be 56 inches to bait. Yeah,

Too big to be normal fire. So crazy. Who even wants on

that big? And I was like, This is disgusting. And then I found out it was one of those robots doing a Knoxville Wow. So I'm a little world beyond the

keep Less Little Little

was little Chief David.

I should have seen little SP a little. Keith has been toying around with David. Yeah, with a little little Craig David Little Craig. David is another one of my robots. Uh, also a British singer. Yeah. Really? Oh, yeah. Also

British singer. But But first, my robot. Right now, these I'm devastated for your loss of tomb or of your sons. And these These sons were killed on patrol as they look for who stole our bottomless piggy bank. That's right,

Which I don't think the audience knows what that is. Way obviously started

a charter school. We kept all of our money in cash in a porcelain are sorry. Ceramic pig that had its pants pulled to its ankles grow faster. Generals Designed by our good friend slob Low Picasso.

No relation to Pablo Picasso. Lots of relation to P slot blow.

Exactly. Because I'm pretty

sure the audience knows all this

information. No, You might have missed a week or four and and just not not heard this. Maybe

you're new to the podcast. Maybe you don't want to go back and listen, which

we always

say, Do not go back.

Don't listen to the current one. That's the only one you need to hear. Move forward. Never look back. Just like

me. No, I was gonna say move forward. Never look back. You know, that's last week. Todd. We heard. Sorry,

but your sons were killed. Yes. While looking for who? Who stole? I piggyback. That's right. They were on patrol, You know, they're patrolling hard, and, you know, that's a lot of money lost, right? Serious. And we're still investigating their

murders because they were there at the scene of the crime. There was a lot of it. Looked like there were some foul play.

Oh, and by the way, students, the suggestion box for, if you know who stole the money is not a place to put funny little jokes, okay?

And to be very a suggestion too much like last time,

much like the suggestion tube from last for a couple seasons ago. But I don't want to open that up and spent two weeks trying to find someone named Carmen Sandiego to find out it was a god damned joke. Okay,

Yeah, we don't know these references.

No, right. I'm humiliated that I had to go go to the police station and ask Where's Waldo? Over and over again. And they laughed me out of there. But I came back and I showed them a thing or two.

Yeah, I spent. I spent three weeks looking for Jimmy Hoffa and then found out, I think that someone else who's not even really I had

to arrest Dustin Hoffman and then apologize.

You you miss, read

the card that I was going to. I saw off and I went for my apologies to David Hasselhoff's family.

Oh, for filming that video of him eating the

hamburger. That was Todd, by the way. Sorry way. That was very much. You've been around for a lot of famous celebrity benders. You were in the passenger

seat for Gibson's rant.

I wasthe you've

taken every

famous celebrity death photo you took that picture of Michael Jackson. His casket?

Well, yeah, yeah, The problem was, they said they said no photography. They didn't say no flash photography.

So you thought you were getting by with a big flashbulb. And what I've heard is that was an old timey camera

with one of those one go only

flattered correctly. It will explode it and got a bunch of light bulb glass all over my actions. Pedophile core.

A lot of people, a lot of people think e desecrating

his memory. And I said, Yeah, I'm the one doing

Oh, come on died. There's no proof he's the king of Pop and these are

good things are good. Uh, L. Gore's making a documentary about how we are the sign of the failure of the American.

Every famous documentarian

has made a stop by the school and asked for a comment from us, and we freely give them.

And the Wayans brothers are also making a movie on inconvenience. Booth School. Yeah, they're in there in full on white face on each other's shoulders

and a big, huge trench coat. Playing Michael Moore, evidently with Michael Moore, was they felt that they weren't tall enough to play him.

He's wider. He's why I all anything put

on a sweater and both stand next to each other. Don't try to

talk. They went through a lot of iterations of trying to figure out how to nail Maura and just stood side by side. And then he had to head. Hate to

tell you guys you're spoofing the wrong director. Inconvenient. Truth is, Al

Gore, right? They got they, but it's got brothers are It's gonna be

funny it No, they're they're geniuses and it's gonna be hilarious. Hilarious. I love it.

Uh, speaking of ah, inconvenient projects, Todd, you have any, uh, real punch

in the face, Are you? Is the insinuation there that every project I've ever worked on has been inconvenient for myself for the people around me or the people involved?

Yeah, very much so.

Okay. Well, um, as you remember from last week, my play that I sold to Broadway meaning a Q VC warehouse, eyes doing swimmingly. They kicked me out of it. I'm not involved

anymore. But the production is moving a

lot of living along, but better than when I was involved there saying so I which is good. It has given me time to work on my Web series. Which job? Yeah. A lot of cool people are working on it. You know, we got we got all the guys in the

booth. Ponti is graphing now. Yeah,

Yes. Uh, Pontius is Gaff ing. You've got Stevo dressed up as a woman playing your mother. That's right. Uh, what? We went through a series of pretty intensive auditions and Steve O dressed up as a woman as my mom was the, you know, the right choice emailed the

talents in the room,

you know? Yeah, right. Yeah, he was when they walk through the door, you know it. You know, we looked at a lot of people, and I told Dame Judi Dench to go fuck herself halfway through

audio, have ways that's actually being a little generous iron. It was right up top while

she walked in. And I said you wouldn't know truth if it was spit in your fucking face, lady.

Right away. Yeah. What's have lame duty lay on duty, bitch. So that's sort of like a dorky shit covered a party, Pete. Unfortunately,

I didn't think that Gwyneth Paltrow was in the room, so it was confusing for her.

So you thought of it later and you're like, Shit, I'll just say it anyway. Even though it's many auditions

later. Yeah, She was in her dishes of lame duty bench

and she had no idea

your idea. And so she yelled at me, and I I thought of the best comeback for her. Well, Meryl Streep was in the room. I said, Group more like poop.

Get birthday. You're getting these people to audition. And these are the actual actress is not bad impersonators.

What's the actual actresses? They're very easy to find. If you go to Hollywood and Highland, they're all just now, Dick info notes You can find some of the biggest stars in the world. I mean, I was going, you know, Charlie Chaplin's alive and well

what I'm not doing Well, yeah, it seems like it seems like all the celebrities that people say or

dead are gone are still very much alive and super sick. Walking around Hollywood

now, Mr Kray, V. Yes. I have been very excited about you were on ESPN. You did? You did a full on ESPN one interview.

I did? Yeah. They came to the school and they wanted to do a profile on the man who is, um, you know, causing high school sports to have a spike in viewership, right? And also crime. Um, yes. Uh, yeah, they tried to box me in.

They really didn't talk

about the spike in viewership. It seemed like the the the piece was about crime. The amount of crime that it sort of started happening in high

school. You bringing it back

to spikes and viewership. But they weren't really interested in them.

No, they only wanted

to talk about the outbreak of crime. That's happening on all the betting that's going on in the sports now and how it's really become. We had been

shady characters that you had to involve yourself with to make high school sports Maur successful.

Yes, And in the last year, we've had we've had I mean, in the last few weeks, even we've had so many instances of ah, of athletes being injured by Jeff Gillooly type characters who are are coming in and and Neek outing.

Jeff Gillooly. I'm just assuming from the name is the guy that kneecap Tonya Harding.

Easy idea, which I'm pretty sure he's the guy who is Tonya Harding's friend or a husband or boyfriend who executed the attack.

Yeah, Gillooly has been sneaking around the school. It's not a gloomy type. It's curly, it's

Gillooly. And if you don't know glue, Leah have never seen him picture a guy that would be with Tonya Harding. That would need Captain Olympian and you'll you got him right away. Jeff Gillooly.

Yeah, cut his hair short and bad and let him grow a little moustache. And that's

Gillooly. But you and him are besties. Now,

I love the lonely. Absolutely, is my main guy. I mean, I've been sending them out to break people's ankles all over town. I mean,

me. This is what I'm This is me.

this is

And you could

say your openness about your participation in crime is the reason that you've gained so much attention a reason that there are multiple Ah, court orders for, uh, you're sorry. Warrants for your arrest. I was under

the impression that a court order. Um, was just getting a sandwich exactly at one time. Or you're in court or something like that. I was like, I don't have a court order.

Me 1/4 I guess. A chicken salad

got a court order in the mountains. You mailed back to the court Chicken salad.

I keep responding to these court orders. Would like I don't know. I ordered chicken salad yesterday. I guess I I don't

know. I don't want to really eat it, but my dick vision ships in the middle of the day. Chips are fantastic, but yeah, I'm Ah, God, I love any food at the courthouse Is so good.

like fried or, you know, really? Take some work.

Anything that's

drink of all time is courthouse coffee Way. All that talk about your ass. Copy that. Little stained white Mr Coffee in the basement, over in the corner. Um, that's just got a really, really watery cup of Joe in. And you know what? We're

Well, my favorite

talking about food and drink and stuff. I have been getting really into cafeteria grilled fish. Really? Yeah, almost exclusively. I'll get the grilled fish, a court cafeteria, hospital cafeteria. I'm

gonna be honest, Todd. Um, obviously, fish has a lot of mercury in it. Your arms look like that, Uh, that, uh, the Terminator's enemy T 1000. Yes,

sir. They are shiny liquid

metal is what you're saying.

Yes, they're shiny. Your arms look a little bit like, Oh, thermometer. Like part of the thermometer? Uh huh. Well, I mean, I could see the vein like, Well, what temperature?

The other day with your finger. And I had 100 and four. Yeah, and I went home.

Thanks again. You really wanted that as a suppository. And I said I could take a temperature through your mouth, so I stuck my hand right in the mouth instead of your but that would have been weird. But I think this looks unusual to you. My arms because, you know, when you look at yourself every day, you can't see the changes,

but you feel the changes. You're kind of metal. To be fair, you've been

in poor health almost your whole life, so I don't know that you could

tell us you were You feel different. I don't know if it's better or worse, but I am, uh when I go into, like, a pool locker room. Everyone runs out screaming. Um, for some reason, I keep going up to people saying, Have using this boy. I don't know if that's related.

That's straight out of the movie Tied. I'm worried. Yeah, out of Terminator two. Yeah, I thought

I thought so. Yeah. I was like, this feels like it's out of the movie. Yeah, Um, and I haven't insane. Just insane desire Thio Kill Edward Furlong. Shit, that's been That's been that way for 25.

Thank you. Should stop beating

on this cafeteria fish. Yeah, I think it might be doing some trouble. I

went to the doctor about that and he said if I did that, I'd be I'd go through some pretty bad fish drawls, So I did not. Did he

really He really? He

said Fist draws air. You story

where? On my mother's grave.

She's not dead. Fingers crossed. She's one of the

oldest women in the world. Uh, and she is not dead. Well, yeah, I

know, but I still have a grave for her, and I swear on it

and you try to put her in all the time and cover it up, Dad, Because your mother had you old.

And you're 77. My mom had me old. Yeah, that's correct. And she showed me no love. I was what they called an experiment, baby, where they wanted to see what would happen to a man of his mother. Never hugged him, showed him any love or

approval. You had it worse than one of these Holocaust babies,

but that's

what I say. Aggressively. I tell people that.

But it wasn't so bad. I had it worse.

I got blocked on Twitter by the Anne Frank Center because I said I had it worse.

Now, that experiment very interesting. Obviously worked out very poorly for the child. But they say it works out really well for the parent.

Your mom obviously thriving at 100 driving incredibly happy. She looks young. She looks 38. My mom's beautiful. Um, yeah, but what?

She she does not talk about you. She won't. She won't have your name in her mouth.

She won't keep my name out of her mouth. Um and I hate her guts, but I swear on my mother's grave that my doctor said I'm going through fish drawls.

Alright, and Howard. What have you

been? Well, I was gonna say, speaking of beautiful women Fuck no, guys, I brought in high, Brought into

your beautiful women. I've never seen one near may

know you brought in. I brought improved, brought in poop was proof That means it's disappeared. Woman, think time. Listen, I had a wonderful I went on a date with a woman a few nights ago, I got home and I said to her, Listen, we know where this is going

because we said last week get

bringing some fucking Yes. And, you know, let me know where this is going. We know where this is going. We're both hitting it off. Would you have any qualms with me recording the sounds of us being intimate? So I brought in, discussed a recording that I made having sexual intercourse for you guys.

And if this feels riel, we will believe it. Believe it. Way will believe. Absolutely.

Okay, well, get ready to hear some real nous. Hopefully, I can get You can hear it if I'm playing

on this microphone. Okay?

Oh, yeah. You like that? You like? OK, Yeah. I'll give it to you. Give it to you,

Just you see Oh, you so far no one else that

that was the sound of me having sex with a woman. And it's irrefutable you so say all you had to do was say, Have her say I'm here and I sent a

no, she's Excuse me, she said to me beforehand she said, She said, It's fine if you want to do that. I don't feel comfortable talking because I don't want my voice to be heard if you're gonna play this publicly. But that

was the sound of me in my bathroom. Nothing. Not your fucking bathroom. We all know rent a center came back and took all your furniture away. And you, including your bathroom toilets. You were renting a room, rent totally empty and sounds like a fucking factory like an empty factory. No. What's more likely? What's more

likely, tell me this. What's more likely that I went on a date and had sex with a woman, or I went home from school the other day, sat on my toilet and talked into my phone for 15 seconds. Inmates, the sounds of me having sex,

that one thing that

I want except the part where you sit on your toilet because rent a center ripped that thing right at your house. We saw it happening.

Now you're trying to fold your lies on top, get you lost your toilet. How? Okay, You know what? I didn't lose my toilet, okay? What? That shit bucket in the quarter said, This is my legs, not my normal

toilet. I'd be worried that if you're lying and there's this much buildup to maybe a possible sexual encounter, you are going to die at the site of a naked woman.

One of the two. You're

gonna die on the approach,

you guys. Sometimes it's really hard being your coworker and your friends.

Well, but what everyone in my life has said to me, so this is no different, but that's the way life is, as far as I know. But we'll try to be better digit students. This is Todd. Padre, with your daily announcement, we request that you no longer use the eye wash station in the science rooms for drinking water. Please use the regular drinking fountains. Thank you to clarify those air the fountains in the center of school that the birds are bathing in. Those are the drinking fountains.

Well,

we got a guest

on the show. Ah, as always, folks were really excited. Ah, he is, Honestly, I would say one of the best drivers we've ever seen. Ah, And he is one of our one of l say best bus driver. Not not Thio know not to throw you under the bus. No pun intended. Sam.

Hey, did Jesus Christ. I said faster, Lotte card. I said to have been run

over by a bi.

I

went. I went thio

thrown under the bus.

I was thrown under a bus.

I'm really sorry. I I got sidetracked because I started thinking about how what I was saying was affecting you. But anyway, we'd like to welcome to the show bus driver Cody Cleghorn. Cody, how are you? Thank you

so much for having me. Yeah,

this is very exciting. You're here because you are

the best bus driver came, and there are a lot of

people driving those buses out there for us. But I honestly I don't know one of them other than Cody.

I'm gonna happen with the school system. The roof. 37 years now, right? Yeah, I've seen some things, You know, the bus culture has really changed since I started, but I still speaks to me in a way that I am. I always hoped, and I just I I wouldn't say that My big concern is that people on my brushes, the the teams and the younger kids, they they sort of like to

hook up on the bus. Right. And this is like we hired

you here in our school because of your record. How how big of, ah, history have driving in your veteran. There isn't a but when a bridge goes out, you know where to go to make sure the school the kids get there. Um, but mostly you keep a funky wild, but

it's a wild little party bus. And I like that. You know, I want the young kids to feel like this is a safe space, a cool zone. But, um, last year, I believe my bus was the home of two conceptions of for teen pregnancies. Great.

No, because this is a bus. You you have

your own bus. You brought your own bus. You didn't use one of our buses that we bought. When

we started with so much into it.

Oh, yeah, Because it is Did it? I put carpeting on. Yeah, there's wraparound seeding, Black light. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's got a really nonstop PDM going. Sometimes I wanted to stop, but I can't get it. I I don't know how to turn it off a little about crazy. I drive real fast. Yeah, but no, I wanted he was all in my mind. Like, what's gonna make the kids feel like they can let their guard down on loan? Behold, they're letting their pants.

That's kind of what we chose you. We think that we have a very cool school. Yeah, So we gotta have a cool bus driver and a cool bus. Yeah. I mean, when the kids leave the house

in the morning, we want them to forget where they live and be in our zone.

You know, the buster. I mean, school begins on the bus. Okay, so I'm setting the tone. I'm keeping it. But I just feel like I mean, the number of H. J's and BJs and CJ's that are happening yet. Cunt jobs.

That is sex. Yeah. Yeah. Now cut job. Is that just kinda Lingus? Or is that

do you stretch the vagina out into the shape of a Penis and blow it like what

you're talking like? You don't know. It's exactly that 2nd 1 Like it's a Penis and blowing.

Kids are always figuring out different ways to enjoy

them. Oh, my gosh, here's a really thing. If you guys heard of soaking. No, I think that the more I used Thio drive around us for in Utah Mormon school, anything that the kid's dio is soaking where they were soaking when

you pee your pants and then you go to hook up later and you swear you haven't peed them.

No, that's stopping a lot. So King is a thing that Mormon kids do was put their Penis in a girl. But they don't thrust, and they consider that Oh, we're not having sex because they're no thrusting.

We're just just

soaking it. Just kind of people from

a guy with unwanted daughter, that is sex

your daughter's on won't

Oh, yeah, I mean, the cycle continues with Yeah, I break my hip regularly, and so sometimes I have to make love without a thrust. And one time I did that and conceived a daughter.

Thank God your Penis is

so sensitive that that's enough to make you ejaculate.

Yes, I have all the Guinness World record for most sensitive Penis Penis

triggered constantly. I'm gonna say this Cody a lot. Ah, a lot of students have said that you actually, while you complain

about all of this sex, you actually seem very interested in what's going on. And

I am on the sidelines taking notes, passionate condoms, making people feel cool. But that's just because, you know, if it's already, it's sort of like what's happening at all. If it's gonna happen in my house, I might as well pretty like a responsible parent drink here and going do it

if you're gonna do an orgy that involves 20 years of Children,

how even if you do

it in front of me before people say this is gross, you actually only you only drive tr our seniors so you only have 18 year olds on your your bus. So it's not You're not like a weird pervert.

I know. Okay, you know, we all in their school, we designed the buses by age group, so I just take the 18 year old kids. And then there's a 17 year old bus and a 15

way. Except wait, there were that

month where you were driving around the same yours, right?

This in yours? Oh, yeah.

The, uh, the Latino Seniors. Yes,

Yes, yes, yes. And they're the who knew yours, right? But I don't That's care and

drive. Yeah. Now, you were the first person

to get HPV in your hair. Is that true?

Yes. You know the thing about any virus people don't understand, it's it's credible to any living thing. But of course, we know our hair is dead, but it's freshly dead. You know what I'm saying? Stevie and I didn't just get on my head hair. I got it on my eyebrows. My eyelashes, huh? My nose hairs? No, like people

say, that's insane. Because you how would you get hair on your face or your head close enough? Thio?

I'm doing a job. You

famously right after Michael Douglas came out and said, I got throat cancer from kind of lingers. He said, I got I could do you one better. Michael Douglas. And you wrote a long article about how

Oh, yeah, hair cancer

I over, man, I've got hair. In my years I've got here in any You know, my

practically it hasn't traveled

to your actual body. It's just hair trends,

right? Right. But any man I feel like my hairs on top of my head going, I could kill you giving me cervical cancer in my head. Well, that's usually the

I'm glad you pulled through.

Yeah, I have a

question about, you know, bus driver style through history, because there's something I don't

know, a lot of money. When did

the big, juicy bus driver, but becoming fashion?

You know, it's all the rage. You're

spending your best two and 1/2 hours a day seated on a big, wide, leathery seat and a lot of bus drivers. It happens that they come in with the normal, but but then there, but sort of like, melts into the shape from the seat. But then also, I would say in 1991 lot of big, flat butted people just started gravitating to the field because they knew this was gonna be sore. Like how Michael Phelps? He has those double jointed ankles. He's just right for swimming in. I've got a big flat. But you're right for the bus driving

because you'll go around. You've been recruiting,

uh, big, chunky, booted men

and see the judge can be a problem. Needs to be big and flat. Have you ever seen a meat tenderizer? Yeah. Those humans go boop boop boop! Because it makes it sound like developing a callous, You know, if you're going to play music. But the music is a bus that you're driving of sex teens.

What I like about that is ah, bus driver when they die, will have just the most tender, juicy little, but

oh, yeah, it's short And you kind of t cut into the gotta cut off the callous and an inside the fruits of that, but

oh, yeah, I love one of my favorite things about going to Spain is getting a big, uh, for breakfast they serve. Ah, um well, they used to serve pot a Negro, which is black foot. It's a type of ah pig. And it only eats a corns and his let

very luxurious look share a

little closer does. Now they are serving. Um, Blanka driver, which is white driver.

Oh, yeah. It's a big leg

driver. My on my driver's license, it says. Organ donor except for my. But that goes to France. Yes. 11 romance language.

of a bus

What do you think

about this is they're starting to produce bus driver's very young, shove a tube into their mouth and fill him with fat on. That is even closer to a flaw. Grow with the bus driver. Do you think that that's a little

bit? They are starting.

You have started this type of farm.

It's me and I'm doing it and I know it's wrong. Okay, I should I shouldn't but I It's like I just feel like, you know, I

There's no law against it currently.

Yeah, And until there is, when I'm gonna keep doing them, women get freakier.

It's really the

wild Wild West out there because they haven't found out a way to sort of get any jurisdiction on this sort of force feeding bus drivers.

That's our attitude. That's why you're a perfect fit here. If there's no rule against it, you test the limit. You know, when you think

about that, if you what is worse to do something that is bad and no it's bad and keep doing it or to not know it's bad and keep doing it. I was ignorance better.

I think ignorance makes you less culpable for your actions. But, uh, I think that if you know what you're doing is bad and you continue to do it, then I'd say, you know, you do have some, uh, some of the blame

what you try to avoid

learning for most of your adult life. And so you have the advantage of staying ignorant then, yeah, if you actively deny information when people are trying to tell you something

that is doing something, knowing what's right and then doing it because then you're like where I'm better than everyone, you

big head. You don't want to be one of these elitists followers, moral Smarties. What would I've always

know, get a

wondered why a bus driver like yourself, right? Doesn't take to the skies the reason you haven't become a plane driver or an air bus driver plane.

Really? I had I mean, if we want to get into it dreams of piloting a Zeppelin. But judging by your glasses yeah,

it doesn't look like you have the best eyesight

I don't know that you lie vision? No, I did, in my early years get to take one example into the sky. But I I drove right into a bunch of prickly pine trees. Do not get very far. And I really ruined a forest because the whole thing, you know, it's like a big balloon. And

neither of you that video of that

is the man screaming over the humanitarian is you took down the whole

forest. I did, I did. Yeah, kind of. Because it popped. And then there was a storm, so got all wet. And then there was a heat wave. So the Zeppelin bits sort of fused into the trees and really ruined the the forest ecology for good. 34 years. They say that a balloon tree grows there, but I think that's alive. I

would say that's probably

and it was like the

the The name of the Zeppelin. You were fine. Was the Hindenburg? Yeah. Like a burn needle from from a