Godparrots with Class Pet Rep Greg LeSessions (Joel Jensen)

Okay, we're recording. I'll cut this. Let me just get levels Will cut this.

Luckily, Howard, you know, But you know how to do it better than Howard. Do you sing a song?

Or, uh, because we're not gonna be singing on air suggests talk, talk normally just, like, say, a secret Or some, like Sandy

bears. A great test 11. But look at this.

Yeah, we'll just start on

the intro. Great. Uh, does anybody have when they want to go first?

Yeah. Yeah. Um, yesterday, I hid behind the women's Panies in Walmart. I laid on my side in a display and watched women pick out there. Panies

what food these are. Groups of threes are groups of massage roving bands.

Foodies aren't. Besides, I I've

been instagramming discreet photos of women and top down photos of your hair for probably six months. Yeah, Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Your hair. Your hair is a is a big draw on. Yeah, but who else

is eating my hair? I'm unaware. I'm unaware of

two stars for $3 signs. I don't think who's charging

by the way? Atmosphere a little here also. I don't know. I wouldn't give me my money back. I found it here in my thighs. Look,

I'll tell you what. There is one positive review, and it's

smooth. Look. Oh, my God. Thing is

making me

uncomfortable. Okay? You ready?

Oh, I really got to pitch the hook in the way

we know the hook,

superstar. Hey, this guy's got one of the most trusted names on the help you with your

high school to be big on social media. You bring this Leamer, and it's going to take the next left.

I got a black bear problem. I can't control

what they celebrate. You can't control it. Actually brought in a bear you can't control

no second. He's doing a sort of a dance. I thought it was anger, but it looks like he's

like I said I can't control

the control thing is that you can't stop. There's

this guy has a case of the

rhythms I think doing a rain dance doing a rain dance or what? But those lips are really articulating is he's dancing around singing a song.

A black bear This is a polar bear that za seed He's just wearing all black polo

collar back

Many. I haven't seen many of these either. Kloiber proceeding. You know it,

Z, I think it is important to sort of bring in that kind of perspective. A little bit of diversity, you know. Ah, lot of kids in the Midwest aren't seeing a lot of Hasidic bear. And

I think a lot of bears keep their religion a secret. A

lot of them keep it, keep it to themselves. Very private about the

seeds are big. What? You know for sure, right. I bet this one love walks.

Okay, alright. Bears are Jewish. Maybe they're always hanging out. Well,

yeah, only juicy examine.

All right, get this guy out of here. It's

probably at least favorite. And

you next bring out your favorite? Just the crown jewel of your van thinks the crown jewels in the back of that long way

why don't

already has the long van that you drive around. Would you go?

It's a tightly packed the US Yes. Yeah. What's your crown Drool? The crown jewel. Now, this is a big one. Okay, this is Ah, fully grown. Full blown. Comodo dragon. Whoa! Hold was the king of lizards.

Oh, my God! Look at oh,

history. Wow. Now, these guys, if they were to bite you their mouths air so dirty and full of bacteria that it festers They follow you around for a week until you collapse from fever and then they eat you.

Wow, That's cool. I had night e.

You've got a pretty good arm hole. Was wondering

about a six day old are?

Yeah, he is kind of like the ring.

Seems like the third is saying, Take me to the doctor.

He's mouthing something about his Don't listen to her whole says it's

like I'm sick. My mouth isn't supposed to be this dirty,

but I think with the lizard is there is He needs a dentist.

Why did you frame the dentist? I think is what the lizard saying? No.

Don't you listen to a word this lizard to say,

Yeah, I think you probably don't know the language. I mean, we've got an animal.

All right. What's the lizard saying? It seems like it's mouthing English to us. Help! Is that help? What does that translate to? Lizard, fantasist? Tiny,

the dentist. Interesting. Interesting. That is he ever said anything like this before. Do you think he's just an unusual environment

saying it? Yeah, I kind of, ah, ascribed to the mutterings of a crazy lizard.

Thought it was just a bit of a raving lunatic.

I mean, his

Yeah,

mouth is essentially foaming.

Yeah, that's probably with it.

A That must be tough Jason for you, because I just slap that

right on his big. But I didn't

care. What is this? This is why

you must know what's happening here. Because it is very

seemed like this'll. This parent made a chicken noise and then said, Son at

I'm, uh, I need a break.

Don't don't go to a big hit of that opium.

No, no, she's don't get yourself overhead. This is a Duplass parrot. I doubt that. It's actually your parent

cracker crackers. Quackers.

Is he asking for ducks

a day for ducks or is he insulted? God, I mean, if you got ducks.

I know this parent

boy. Sam. Who is this? Sam is very high. Getting undressed. He's putting on it. Come on, my

dragon. Not a dragon

way. Hit! Play on the record player. Sure. This parrot is good, man. Velvet underground. Nice. This parrot is my uncle man. Thistles! Uncle Day. Uncle ta Dave. I haven't seen you since court When you didn't say anything, Okay.

He's either having an opium induced hallucination here or this parents is uncle

on the top of a mounted. Okay, that's realization. Walk us through this. I was still in the teachers lounge, okay? Not a hallucination. You are. I love you, Dave. You're my uncle, and I've never felt more connected to you. I don't care about that thing that happened. So we're getting something here. It's

This is better than all those years of therapy just doing opium and seeing a parent. It's fine.

Black Nike cars off. Whoa! Oh, my God.

It's Wow, It's fine. You criticized my art when I was a kid and impressionable

God, you hear it? Talk shit to him and never had self confidence ever since

you made me take my clothes off while I painted.

Oh, shit. Uh, it was both eyes that dark. If it's apparent, Uncle that made him repairing

itself is very colorful and vivid.

I can't tell if

it's visually the parents.

Not if you replace human dark human activity with one animal. Doesn't make it funny, Or is it still just dark? And so I

feel better. Let's not talk about

get this and get out of here. Get out of here. You

feel for your slapping? Absolute

God, I love a nice

little permission. Good old slapping period.

Well, um, when

that was that was crazy.

That was a realtor trip we just went through. That was unintended, Sam. Yeah, no pun intended sale. Who was tripping? A bit of a safari. Yeah, well, judging by the silence, I feel like we don't have a four to talk about what's going on?

Well, I don't know. I mean, we got a big week coming up this week.

Yeah, we should talk about the week. Uh, let's Dio let's do a little segment. Okay? This is Amy called. We got a big week way but yeah, I was talking about the big thing, that coming up they're excited about. So this way we'll go throw the nuclear Utkan top us off the Yeah, Let's

make the guest go last. Yes. Uh,

this week is, of course, spirit in activity week at school, which is a big chance for us to show what our contribution is and how we're grounding it this year. We're gonna show our spirit, so I'm gonna be in the office as usual. Uh, I'm gonna be looking at the phones, and I'm going to be inviting every child who wants to come into the office and meditate with me. 21 free crystal. Okay. And one free hug. Wow. Wow. Just let everyone know I'm centered and grounded. Okay?

Just like all good street art says all

you need is hugs. That's right. I let we

love street for the kids to bring cash. House will be selling some of my glasswork as well as

you do in a cash only glassblowing business. That's right. That's

very dangerous, cause that gets hot as hell in boiling. Glad

I have. I have my friends. I have my forge set up in the bullpen right behind where I sit on the thin carpet and it's going wonderfully.

Keep all that loose cash just in one big dry pile next to the fire,

right? That's right. That's what you really dry up Teoh leaves? Yeah, well, yeah, I think, uh,

come get spirited. Get lifted.

I'm very excited this week. Coming up activity week. Obviously, I have entered my home ec students into a banana bread bake off a day nearby festival. So I'm I haven't got competition out of my blood completely. We are learning how to bake this week, and I want Oh, give it some real stakes. You

had them to have been in a bread suicides the other day, right? They would have to run from edges attached to the court with each ingredient.

Exactly. Yes. So they run with smashed up bananas. They run with flour. Tom, a 10 10 on.

You said you wanted to give the banana bread competition some steaks. How do you think those flavors going to mix?

Yeah, s E A. K s stakes. I think it's something new in banana bread. Banana steak, bread. You could

say putting the meat in a bread is kind of a new thing, not just for banana bread. It's for any

way. It's a sandwiches. Typical sandwich. It's just a sandwich with banana bread bun, and it's really all it is. But yeah, we're we're We're planning on going to the banana, the local fair and doing the banana bread bake off eso. We'll see how that goes. Obviously, I've got the uniforms. We've all seen the uniforms that I made for the home team.

Yes, you do. I would say it's a shoddy job.

Yeah, yeah, it's a woman in a It's a woman in a, um, apron, and it says, Get in the kitchen. Uh, what what is that? You know, you're what is that bad?

Hey, if you want, you want that to be what it is. That's what it is. I think

if you if, like someone comes up, that's kind of offensive. The person who's offended has to be around to bring it up. There's no women around themselves, so I think it's for

male only team bacon, bread, computation, bacon, bread or steak, bacon, bacon, bacon, bread making bacon. We're

really excited for you to show off your spirit in that bacon competition you

do, Really? Oh, and as you guys know this week, the yearly wrapping paper fund raiser for the band is happening where we sell wrapping paper, uh, a

lot around Christmas at all. It's wrong. Taming

Christmas thistles this weird part of the year word No. One's birthday is for the next two months,

but you know, but you never You can never have enough wrapping paper. So if you see one of the six members of the marching band asked them about the wrapping paper fundraiser because we're going to be using those funds. Teoh take us to band camp later this year,

levels on that. How was that? Uh, levels were good. Do

and we're not too big schools, about 3500 students. But if you see one of the six members of the marching band like should ask You About

yet and buy

from them last year, they used told about one or two roles that you guys only ended up with 150 $160.

Since, uh, it was it was a really bad year last year, were hoping, and then you could say That's why we only have six members in the marching band this year, So we're trying. We're trying to make The marching band didn't do a thing, guys, I'm sick of having only six members. I'm trying to get people excited about it. And to do that, you have to be able to take him to cool events, take him toe camps and retreats and humiliate them and trying really, really them trying not to humiliate them at competition. So again, if you could just, you know, by a couple rolls of paper Michael Rolls, you can wrap your school books in them. Or you can wrap presence in 68 months.

Yep, and come to the spirit play that we're putting on Starting pod, tawdry and written by part Adre. Yeah, he's exciting. New talents got a lot going on.

So the Lion King is canceled.

Was that? No, no, no. The fighting is still happening. That first mayor, we're doing a spirit play kind of quick turnaround. It's like, What is it about? Do you know what Padraig right about Yeah, it's about his relationship with my ex wife

pods relationship with. How does that How does he taking a

lot of creative liberties? I think you kind of imagine studying. You do you like studying May. And this kid has an eye for art drama. It seems I shall starting him. None of the other kids are good enough for the play on. I think this 10 year olds really got what it takes.

You're sticking with the fact that he is 10

young guys, and

I just believe what they tell me. All right? I didn't sign this kid up. He's a 10 year old who is wonderful. A theater. Onda has a similar name to May

the animals you're bringing up for Spirit week. Yeah, actually, uh, I'm going on a little vacation. Really looking for. I'm going on vacation with my number one family, which is Steve Irwin's former wife and his two Children.

It is a it really is a cut throat business.

Where you guys going? Borneo. Okay, okay. That's fun.

More neo in the USA is

right. Is Borneo in the U. S. A. A so

far as I know, yes.

Borneo? It's deep South et sound These

Where is

deep South Florida, Florida.

There's a lot of Aqaba bears around there. What? Aqua Bears, Manatees.

Thanks for being here. Uh, it was great to learn about all these animals getting the hell out of here on until next week. Thanks for joining us. Please stay.

you need more?

Uh, no more. The secret. Uh, just the part of why you're turned on by women picking panties out. Yeah, yeah. D of them making the

well. It's really more I found. When I was there, I was more turned on bike, the confined space than really even the women picking out their panties it anywhere. So Yeah. So I found that out. I didn't even really need to be in the women's section, so I ended up bawling myself up behind a bunch of basketball's over in the sport. Well yourself. Oh, I was show turned on.

Okay, levels of good

today. I know why I go for it. Uh uh. Last week I pretended to work at a Burger King and stole the money out of the

till. Okay. We'll cut that. You stole the

No, it's obviously you're dressed like a dead gorilla. Yeah, it's It's a dead gorilla. Got a bleeding wound that is somehow being reanimated. I

cannot believe that the zoo was profiteering off of that. Can you believe they produce these? Costume

it all this constant is that official Harambe merch. Everything I'm in is official Haram bay. Yeah, and so these air Harambe glasses I'm in right now. So Harambe top hat

and the proceeds do go to his estate.

Yes, they do go to the Harambee family in the bomb Bay estate.

And what is that? Is that gorillas somewhere? Is that a family to the family? Like sponsor him. Do they own him?

Well, it's you know how Michael Jackson But the Beatles, all the Beatles music. Yes, yes. Oh, it So this is my projection. Did that with her arm

basis Hall was mad at him for that. You believe that? Yeah. That's a normal thing to Dio Michael Jackson

should on the Beatles music. Courtney love should on Nirvana's music. What? You create something that's not yours, That you go to the highest bidder? Yeah, everyone, but yeah, these are my harambe a ah crocks. Um

Harambe gorilla. I love gorilla Chest T shirt?

Yes. Yeah, gorilla chest T shirt. But thank you again for noticing that I've been better on campus. I have a positive I'm at my office hours when the students come in, which has been very hard. Uh, I'm letting the students act in the school. Play the Lion King right now. Yes,

yeah, good job. It's very good. It seems like the rehearsals are on

track to open rehearsals on. People can come and go as they please.

We've been hearing the sound track has just been booming across campus, and it has been fantastic.

You can hear,

though it's

been it's been great. It's pretty disruptive, Yes, but it's

now. I saw I I walked by, you know, there's a little window in the classrooms the other day, and I walked by when you're holding auditions for Scar, Um,

and those the best idea we ever had was putting one little window and all the

little rectangular window When you gotta have it, that a, uh um and I did see a very obvious scarecrow in your seat behind your desk and then a student question mark auditioning that let the light like either time.

Oh, well, I don't know what you saw. I know there was a promising new student pod. Todd Raiders, whose do it was a cannon, was cast. Well, a scar

has been cast. Padre

Padre. And he's also he just joined my marching band as well. Yes.

Yeah, he's a real jack of all trades. So much

that you may be is overextending himself already on the first week of school.

I mean, I definitely was in my home at class.

Yeah, and I heard he's doing well in there.

Yeah, he's doing pretty well. Good.

Um and I don't know this whole scarecrow business because there were crows all over the theater. So obviously that's not what you saw.

Well, it seemed like you packed the theater with crows to throw off the fact that it was a scarecrow. Because if the crows weren't there, everybody would be like, Well, that's a scarecrow, of course, but it seems crazier. There were been packed with crows. Your ah, Padres auditioning.

Okay, So what? What are two choices here? That I was watching the auditions in a promising new student auditioned with a similar name to May? Or that I bought a scarecrow to watch the additions. I came in an audition, is a young child and then thought to myself Well, people are gonna know it's a scarecrow. How do I convince him it's not I by 3000 scare crows and I filled the theater with

President. It's even crazier things scared. Those clothes were fighting were frightened. And the crazy thing is like you said, Padre is a young child. This isn't even a student whose past puberty but tawdry is passing himself off as a young virtuoso like he's pretty best 10 year old is 10

years old, and he's a senior.

You wanted to be on The reason this is hard for me to believe is because I've never heard you talk about a student. The way you talk about Padre, I've never heard you have such glowing review. Usually, you say you hate your stupid Do you think he allegedly killed students in the

past 11? Allegedly, Waverly. If anybody sees the way Amber lays, let us know where it just be. Right. What's this? Right with the rim relays again?

Releases. Ah, well, my documentaries on Netflix. You can check it out, release, uh, finding the Web release on. And it's about 6 to 8 sets of twins and the Wimberley family who were all I allegedly killed in my theater classes on a pair that were hit allegedly by Sam. And I am saying about the weather because

he thought they were a stop sign.

They were fire hydrant, right? And that is not alleged. That's proven. I did hit the kids. I do not know

they didn't die. They disappeared. And so the documentary is about how these 12 kids, all twins living in Cuba, are living in Cuba on, and I am not Bonnie Simo. And so there's a lot of edited photos of what I think they look like now when Cuban had smoking cigars of

what you think they look like

right, because we haven't found them. But it's kind of like if you're in Cuba and you see this kid and I take a photo and it's a kid in a hat wearing all linens, Uh,

it's not living close.

No, on scientifically. That's called the hypothesis, right? You know what

you do? It's a scientific hypothesis, and I'm waiting for it to be proven. So anyway, Padre, I mean, you should see this kid. Most students just infuriating their hot is they're not as adult as I am. They're going through these changes and they don't know what it is and they're asking for help.

You expect the kids to be sort of your equal, and if they're not, it's a free old

struggle so hard to teach them how to be an adult. Just be that where Padre kid. I'm not having issues with, um so I mean,

what you say. It's not year. Wait

a question from We're not going to sit here and roast you for a whole day. Look, And and I mean, honestly, it Otherwise, if this is all true, this sounds like you are You really are about as normal as you've ever been.

Time normal or not normal. Back to basics, baby. Sam, I really enjoyed the the weekly barbecues. You've been having a really good for morale.

Thank you so much. Yeah, those have been really, really good for morale. Uh, we haven't

had nearly enough. Al on campus.

Where is our

Hewlett shows up

T o on. And that's what I That's what I noticed that the school was missing.

Try to trick out, to kill. Come around.

That's right. That's right. I know he had been pretty offended when Al and our previous principal have gotten in a big, big, big

fight between Al In the print I

saw Prince I with right. It was a

house of fat man, you know,

way. Love

it. I mean Rovio. He's fat, He's funny. He bumps into things. Sometimes they stick.

He's always in real movies. Is really fatties overweight way

really, really, really chunky. Exactly. And

talk to him. And not only is he smart, but he's fat

thes. He's very complimentary of you and checks in with things that you are have been working on A remembers things about you. And he's fact

exactly, exactly, treats that he normally used to treat the kids really wonderfully like the kids all really loved him. He was super fat and they always like he did. They all did good on his his test

just a classic example of a good communicator where only as happy as we are fat as we are fat? No, not just fat as we are. We're only as happy as we can Let others in right. And he kills gives you exactly what he needs. I need food and companionship because I'm alone and hungry. And so what? I invite him to a barbecue. I you know, we knock them both out there. He's having a blast.

Is that the only thing that so these barbecues obviously have been having our for more. Our great former and but but also

for morale really boosts everybody's feeling. Yeah,

yes, yeah, everybody's had better feelings. It was better feelings

had morale, and and I'm really proud of that. It's my first assignment this year. I haven't having barbecues for yourself. It's my first assignment that I've been able to tackle because of my emotional re centering. I was in a pretty heightened space last year. I'm just silly talking about it. Um, for last couple years actually blew the school were balloon, you little robots. Little cowboys. It's It's been an emotional journey, and I feel like I'm finally getting back to myself. Yeah, So barbecues have been a nice way to avoid any of my work at school. Yeah, and do something that we all actually enjoy instead of like, picking up the phones

or which have literally run off the hook now direct.

Yeah, they're broken, which is wonderful. Which is wonderful, because now that pesky sound is gone. What

they say, You know, if you have a line outside, it makes people want to come in. And a lot of people say, Like, That's not how schools work. No, we don't join. In the middle of the year,

money out of the till.

Yeah, I needed a little bit of walking around money, and I was having a lunch at Burger King. Eso I just don't

love walking around money.

Yeah, I need

different. Another month,

My nose gun. You take it out of the A T m. You know, it's already going

t o from 5 to 200.

Yeah, depending on where you are. If you're in Vegas, you need what, 3 $400 walking around money. If you're

walking around the table, money

table table money is different. Natural

table money's 333 52. Maybe 1000. Right? Right. Hey, on your you know what? Your highest.

I still 33. 50 from Burger King.

Sense that's walking around money

popping 33

33 33 cent eats.

Yes. Jesus was 33 when he died. Jesus was a 33 year old man when he was crucified. By

we've had show up on height furiously trying to get in touch with school. And I think that's because of the line. I mean, because of the line of them not being able to get through. They want to reach us even more. There some scheduling problem in some delivery problems we've had, we have

a right to their students. Measles, mumps and rubella Vaccinations were postponed because we never heard from the reps, even though they left multiple.

Yes, measles. Measles is coming back in America. Yeah,

students, the measles, mumps and rubella. Immunizations or postponed. So stay away from all three of those things until further notice.

I actually I have mumps, right? Monster back mumps are honestly not that bad. You guys see him? No, no, no. Just bump. Well, let me show you my months. See those

those air mumps. So those, let's let's describe these numbers, look like for

our audience what you're seeing

readers, Our readers and listeners at

home. But again, if you're reading the transcript of this for a deaf students, was I

thes mumps? Look about like fist size growths on her

mom is drawn on him.

Yeah, they're pictures of my British mother.

Little bumps with pictures of your British mother there

months. And you did just have bumps.

Yeah, you're not officially, These are not what people know. They in the doctor community, giant doctor, community. These are things that I've called mumps. They're not actual mumps. These are not official months. You know, like the merchant wearing These are not official

member. You were an unofficial month,

right? Exactly. Um but I'm hoping that some of the Scottish you will go down. Um, you know, as I you guys all know I was once an ostrich. Um, I was younger. I was once a bear, so I've got a lot of stuff going on inside,

but strong immunity. I mean, you're not You've got immunity from both those animals. That really makes you absolutely

your immune to ostriches and bears. It's pretty. And

you you got really rocked by a bear thrown around. Ah, torn up. And you're totally into

it. Yeah, No, I go camping all the time and I get, like, tough just tossed around and thrown up against trees with their jaws. That's

not one bear. Try to eat you like a human eating lobster. Put a little bit, bond, but break you up in Depew.

You crack me up and break me the butter and get me but

trying to turn you into butter while

you're trying to show me the butter. It almost seemed like now, obviously the crazy thing it seems like the crazy thing is that I a man is and being eaten like a fancy meal by a bear. Right? But what was weirder to me is that the pair was obviously celebrating something like a bear.

That bear does not always have a nice lobster.

It was There was rare that he was there having a lot of these people are Other bears were congratulating him and felt like, Yeah, you.

That is the weird thing. You think that is the weird thing

you want eating up Ray Lewis because he was trying to do a surf and turf?

That's right. That's right. And unfortunately, he couldn't get it. Surf you could get it because you were sopping wet, right? You would just come out of your

story. Yes, I was. When you

were surfing up in the mountains,

it was in Big Sur. I was a Big Sur. Beautiful, uh, which is guarded HBO. Take out a big surf. California. It's not nice. Uh, it's southeast, southeast,

deep south east.

Um, anyway, yeah, I know. I was immune to that. I made it through that. I survived. That's good. Bear attack.

Bear's birthday. Maybe that wasn't it.

I mean, I ended up being attacked, but it was a bear celebration. Survive that spare

celebration. That's really nice. Let's do, um you had the big marching being competition against Ah Drumline. Featuring who was the person that they had featured there they featured

was the Neptunes. It was it was the Neptune.

It was It was it was

It was our six person sitting ban against a drum line with the Neptune Perot.

And I saw

that the whole stadium show with the smog

snow that that's among machine they It's been a lot of money on getting getting the stadium really dirty. Ah, and they you know, when I saw their, uh, their show. I was, um I was scared. You know, I I went I was as prepared as a guy with a six person marching band. Could be OK. And I we watched there. We watched their show, and it was just like I mean, smog is everywhere. They had, like, trash trucks coming in from both sides, sinking to the beeps. Why, uh, there was the whole theme of their show eyes. The theme of their shows. Uh,

theme was about global climate change is changing. Climate change is real. Filling with smoke and being like, Is anyone warmer, Colder Second, people talking about climate change in what way you think about that?

The earth it warms, it cools. There was an ice age like it's gonna be fine.

Yes, it's not. I mean, what, you want us to stop burning coal and oil because you think it's bad for us all. Sit in a room with Colin oil burning and prove to you it's fine for us. Sort of enclosed space.

Yeah, you're going to do a, um, a Morgan Spurlock like with McDonald's. But with coal and oil burning in a room

room for a month, uh, with coal and oil, and it's gonna show that just like super size me showed that McDonald's is fine. Yeah, this is gonna show that global warming doesn't exist. And I'm gonna be more smug and more annoying than Morgan Spurlock.

I don't know. I don't know. Good luck.

Yeah. The other thing they can I have in common is we both hosted a crappy nineties and TV reality show.

Really? Oh, yeah. You hosted,

um, Sprung. Broke, right? Yeah, I hosted MTV. Sprung, broke. And so these were people who had just been gotten off a bail out of prison. They just got sprung and had no money. It was not sexy. Yes.

You took him to South Beach to rob everybody who was on spring break.

Yeah. Yeah. So we robbed we Rob Bill Bellamy. We're updating Cortez. Rob. Vitamin C. I

t. V really set up their own employees there.

Yeah. Yeah. Kurt Loder way tried to rob him. Um,

US murdered loaders. Oh, yeah. Yes. Yeah, It was while

I wasn't. And that was a hologram. For the last seven years of his career,

when they invented the hologram technology, they wanted to use it on someone, Important said, Let's try it with load or first. This is the guy.

This is the guy for sure.

And then if this works, we'll take a step down to Two Park or someone like that. So no less of an effect on the cultural atmosphere.

Loader, who lived to about 65 mildly read news to people who weren't interested, opposed to, you know, to pack who only lived to 25 changed music forever.

Well, you know what? Loader made a deal with the devil. This is true. You could have no talent but somehow continued to do a job that nobody wanted or needed. Reading news on MTV.

That's the deal. That's the best deal I've ever.

God, I love that.

And what did you What did he give up?

What did he give up? Attractive missing personality.

He was handsome. He was Fabio. Fabio asked and give it

up. Never after work. Yeah, he had. Did Cortez's body. Yeah, that was the trade. And Cortez had to be famous for four years, and then nothing.

We're normal now,

So, uh, band is playing against the Neptunes. It's filled with far

warming isn't really small.

Their prominence Margon And I mean, when their performance was done, the judges stood up and clapped. They gave him a standing ovation. They actually they actually asked if they could just cancel the cancel the whole competition. And I said, Please, just let us go. Uh, I begged them to please let us go. I know it was bad, but then, you know, I decided to make a huge choice, all right? And and I got found out mid performance

way were all there. We also I was so humiliated.

It was it was maybe the most humiliating day of my entire life. I had my six, my six marching band members go out on the stage, and I had him all have those, uh, you know, those old gags where you'd have, like, a pole with mannequins attached to it and make one so one person can control five or six very t to make a 30. I tried to make a 30 person band out of six people. Ah, and you know, to fill out that sound, I took a page out of the old Milli Vanilli handbook and

and you win a little we'll even Ili way because you were trying to make a 30 person. You took six people and you put ah five

on each of the person was 6 64 person

band, which is a Lego way.

You went well, even Ellie with

on. And so anyway, mid mid track, their plan, their plan attacks and it's getting hot in here, The Nelly song. So you're playing that track with Nellie's voice, his voice So? But I thought it was within theme. It was within the theme. They were doing global warming and I was like,

now, I know. I've you know, I've been really calm and normal lately, and so my lower registers might not be picking up. Should I tell a secret in my Yeah, one of register. You'll be speaking out. Okay. To get money for heroin, I killed a young dog for a horny man. Christ,

that's dark, but is tough. Sam, are you

happy? You cannot. Happy for a man with a boner is a puppy. What?

It was a It was Ah, Well, it was a homeless man who couldn't afford to support his animals,

So corniness was unrelated. Hey, just also happened to be horny. I just needed money

Way that's gonna have questions.

I know we've all said that we will enable you by not telling you to stop, but we will not financially enable you. But if you're gonna kill a dog, I'll throw a few bucks your way.

Yeah, Come on.

I just want to say so. That wasn't true secret. That was.

It is getting hot

in here.

You're kind of doing a rebuttal. This was almost the debate.

Yeah, yeah, I tried to make it that, but then

then, of course, the CD skipped. It was just It's getting it. It's getting it's getting in. And use any

of that is because you had kept the CD on the ground in your car. Three months

I fished around in

my car for something, and all I could find was a CD that honestly looked like I'd scraped it on concrete for a few days. Well, the

bottom of your car is concrete, right? because my car car was dragging,

I I lowered it. I lowered a lot. Too much of my came. I

lowered it because I thought it was cool. But then the sort of bottom burned out as I drove it for a little

while that all your tires pop. So you had to put that large tusk as one big front wheel across the front.

Yes. So it's now more of a sled that I pushed with my feet and whoever is the passenger keep

denying that. That is elephant tusk. But we know it. ISS Uh, no, it is.

It's not an elephant tusk. It's artificial elephant. Uh,

okay, then where's how? Right When you got that in your car, the elephant at the zoo lost its test. Coincidentally,

Yeah, You're gonna have asked the zookeepers. Okay, I don't know. What are you saying? That I would give you know what's funny? That footage was doctored. The man on the man in that footage is is way more pale than me. Uh, before you

say you have cartoonishly 10 you've obviously gone to attending. But a

judge today before you say that I paid myself with with wood stain every morning to make me not look as pale as I actually am. Yeah,

well, when you say more

pale, you mean more like a bucket? Yes, the guy. I mean, listen, the guy in the video, the guy in the video was didn't look anything like a bucket and look at me.

Yeah, you look exactly

like a bucket. Eso eso I mean, either either I put on a costume that made me look nothing like a bucket. Right? And I went in there and I and I used a new electric saw to cut the tusk off of an elephant.

You know,

I think we

need to know a little more about you hear the band teacher, and you're pathetic because your band sucks. But what's your boss? What's your ethos? I mean, you drive a Flintstone's car, you're working with almost nothing.

My my ethos, and I mean that I would say my ethos in general is to just make do with what you have. OK? Don't push. And of the land, you're resourceful. I'm resourceful, guy. I mean, and you gotta be, you know, working, working as a teacher. You know, for the past 15 years, I've been a teacher, and every time a problem comes to my face, you know, you could either stop and say, Well, I can't fix this. So there's no there's no path forward. Or you can say I'm gonna cut a few corners, a lot of corners and I'm going to solve this problem in the best way that I can. Usually that means, uh, doing a bad job. T get the same result,

but it But that's a job that no one else is doing, right? So if I finish it, you can't tell me that you're not satisfied with how it got done. I'm on your same page.

Yeah, yeah, yes, the job. If the job gets done, it doesn't matter if you cheat Steel break laws a song as the job gets done, and that's what it always what, always the way that I've operate

that's going a little far. I used to agree with you, but I'm normal now, and I think that that is that's a little too much for I think, what we're trying to do this year. Am I right? I mean, lounge world. We all got to support each other, right and I don't want to go any crazier than anyone else I know.

We've been to hell and back and were normal. Now,

um well, uh, we do want to say, take a pic quick break, but we need to get some materials in the lounge, you know, because Howard paid for everything before. Now he's dead. So we've had to get some sponsorships today. Way Got a new sponsor for our headphones eso were wearing on. We recommend this to anyone for any of your headphone needs. We're wearing audio slave way audio slave here, but

yeah, you've all heard of beats by Dre. These airhead bones by audio slated,

there's no pun. They're just called headphones by audio slave.

And let me let me tell you something. I got these headphones home right now, and I have never heard so much travel. Hi, Just what you want.

Honestly, I can't tell if what I'm hearing is my tinnitus or you Tinnitus. Tinnitus?

Teoh Correct with production. So if that's the right way, it's tentative.

What does that mean?

What's tonight? Us. Then

tonight it's or tinnitus is ear ringing. It's permanent earrings.

Wake up and you never feel like It's morning. That's when you have tonight. Us. You, You, you and you always think it's nighttime. You always think it's time for dinner. Yes, I had tonight us for a while. It was so sure tough

because I woke up this morning. Eight. A big, big roast beef was like, I get a college. Everybody

I area you get a big roast beef slather on some horseradish in a few glasses of wine. You're back to bed by 10 a.m. You think it's

B? Wait, you're suffering from tonight s Go ahead and come on down to the lounge will help you out with that. We've all been there, so I just

laid earbuds. Sponsor today's podcast. We'll be right back with more

attention, Hamilton Students, If you see Dana Carvey wandering around campus, let us know. I repeat, if you see Dana Carvey walking around campus, let us know submissions are open for church lady class on Friday. Well,

we got a guest in the lounge today. More normal now, So we're trying to bring in Ah, guests. That air is normal. Is us on dso this gentleman we've known for a while. We're excited. Teoh have him on here to talk about his life. He is a class pet rep, and his name is Greg List sessions A. Greg,

It's really nice to be here around a bunch of normal guys.

You man, you really keep us stocked with class pads

for not the first time we've met. Obviously

love your family.

Love your family.

They're a great family. Been around for centuries.

Now you have multiple families. You have your human family, right. But also your family that you call your animal,

right? Well, I have three human families. I don't want to give short shrift to the other two. They rank second and third behind the first place family, of course. But animal kind is I kind of hold as another family. Right?

So you deal with animals, is your family, But also, you got a wife and kids, another wife and kids and then a husband and adopted kids, and you rate them against each other and the share your time between all

of them. Correct. And again, it's nice to be around a bunch of normal guys

again. I think this is really a big love.