Is this all Hallow's Eve? Or is that

I think Halloween. The day is all Hallows Eve

today is not the evil. The

Halloween remember First is all Hallows

is All Hallows Day, I

think. Well, that's fallow.

We've So Halloween is the day All Hallows Eve must be night before I

think it's Ah either. I think it's an either or situation, though, where we're like because Because Christmas Eve is the day before. You see this is a tough pair before. Well, I wish we could get a Valentine's Dave so I could remember.

Oh yeah, you've been in that you been in the dog house a few times, forgetting Valentine's.

I mean, I am the king of running, stopping by

a CVS on February 14th and given what's rummaged through. I usually find a couple of loose flower had a women's what's Time February 14th but reporting about 6 p.m.

Six. Yeah, when I'm getting off the O.

J o b,

I've got ah, graduation teddy bear and a Valentine's Teddy bear that I just switch back and forth,

used you steal it back, you steal it back. Well, you haven't given anybody a Valentine's gift in a long time.

Oh, well, not solicited or not Consensual people. Valentine's gift.

Have you had a Valentine's Day gift returned or not accepted?

Well, I always give proceed a Valentine's Day gift that s so that they can return it. Not in front of me. But, you know, once a year I'll have a Valentine returned from, Ah, Bo or every every time, once a year. It doesn't three on Valentine's Day, but once a year and then obviously my whole class. You know what? There's

somebody gives you back a gift once a year. Yeah, Valentine's right, right? Used you. Specify balance.

Well, because a lot of people you know are aware of how, uh,

disgusting you are. Well, I saw you

last year on your Valentine's Day date, but I could only ever see one person at the table.

I see a man sitting at

the table. The woman was in the bathroom, and then the woman would come back sort of fixing her wig. And the man

was, and I know we do this a lot, but this was a Mrs Doubtfire situation.

No, no, I mean, I guess last year I did go on a date with my my daughter's new nanny. Um, on I don't know what a couple

of the details. Todd, just change a couple of the details. You don't video Doubtfire,

but Mr sure ice her name? Sure. Our name was Mr Sure. Ice,

Mr. Scher. I sow doubt her Doubtfire. Sure. Ice.

Oh, yeah, those air kind of opposites. Because I know you've always got synonym dot com up

on your computer so we know what's happened.

That's for my plays in my poetry.

Well, that's what that's because you plagiarized them dot com. You don't use it. The saurus you get. You know,

I don't know if you've read my new play the We haven't my new poem. I've got my new poem, The

You Dig Poems Now voices off

Shakespeare had a lot of poems. We've got some of your poetry. Oh, yeah. I mean, I would love to show you my poetry book. All

right, so this is going

to require us to know one poem, others you're

going to change

the person that is getting a phone call from the ringer.

Ok, good. So that is, uh, the man. It's on a ridge that, like Walt Whitman. What? What is the type Padre is trying to say? We don't actually know which one he's riffing off is what we're learning. We'll see on and you won't tell us the source material on that.

No. Why would I tell you? It's my own brain. I mean, there's way. Try my familiar with you. Familiar with why the pigeon in prison has makes mouth noises? I

know why the caged bird sings. Okay, I see. I saw one. You had written down a pigeon in prison,

barely a seven them. But that's pretty good that I saw

when I saw you working on one. And the title of it was Ah, the ST least walked on.

Yeah. Yeah, well, you know, because we all take different streets.

The road less traveled, tied its street, least walked on waste. Adam taught. I think you need this. I think you need to reassess your sort of commitment to art.

What about

the dog of floor Boulevard? Your movie? The dog of floor Boulevard?

Your move? A dog of a floor boulevard. My movie.

I did a couple. Antony. Yeah, you did a couple antonym.

That's right. Well,

well, I don't know this, but the dark cover

has Internet, and they don't make him clear enough.

So? So a lot of people don't know this, but the word plagiarized was invented about you.

Well, yeah, that was about me originally, because it was about my plays. I'm geriatric and they hurt your eyes. So plays,

right. Why, Jerry actor Kirk tries. Yeah, that makes sense. And that's what copying it

s. So that was really when her old man right to play that hurts arise because it is such a rip off that is based on me. That's based on my original play. Of course. Let's see. What was that? That was Italie. Oh, on And Ruby Liet.

So Romeo and Julia? Yes. Oh, I see what you did, Rome. You know, I say Juliet. Jewell. Ruby,

I got to say

it might be easier to just write original poems harder.

Okay, uh, tell that to my $500 subscription to sit in them, but calm.

And then at one point, he said at three. Brute A like, at that point, you were just like you just got That was

more of a sequel. You know, we've seen that too. But what about a three?

Where? What I haven't seen. I did see ET That's the original DDT brewed tea brewed. Gets fucking staff into that. Well,

Todd, these poems, I mean, they do sound unoriginal and pretty bad, but at least you're being creative again. That's really

cool. You were in a slump there.

You were saying? Yeah. Yeah, it was a force U s. Oh, yeah,

but I was gonna say, Should we actually start the episode before we get into what happened with your play? Kick it, You beat you give up. Why get lend the music right? And as we know Well, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another every side of the teacher's lounge. The first personally podcast pertaining to issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community. I, of course, empowered the Fonz Levis

Howard, the funds. Now why are you going by the funds? Is because

I'm not going by the funds guys, people have just started. It's it's a new nickname. I know. I've had a new nickname every week and this one sticking What? You've definitely

combed most of your hair out with

that with that comb. You Wow. I've been anxiety can. Here's the thing. The only comb I had for a while was a fleet home. So it's really, really thin. Bristles and my hair combs bull. Well, I Okay, let's not call it what it really is. Okay, Flee bald E.

I mean, he's both who's the guy. Doesn't need a comb.

Yeah, but he has a very thin, very, very thin space between the bristles and my hair follicles obviously are pretty fixed. So it was ripping them out as I was combing my hair because I thought I had to You have to

waken me up a lot in the morning, combing your hair and just screaming in the back.

It hurts, man.

Eso you guys are

We've been sort of bunking. I've been, uh I've been sort of between places.

Uh, yeah, yeah. What happened to your other place?

Infestation, infestation? Rats, Vermin station. I forget to take out the trash, you know, every for months on end sometimes. And the vermin will. When the trash is away, the vermin will play. When

you say

berman, vermin is such a you're he said what I would assume. All the vermin are bugs. Rats. What other vermin could possibly exist.

Possums. Wildcats, Wildcats. Averman, Bobcat. Small cows. Small cows. Yeah. Have Shetland ponies. Okay, I have a Shetland pony investigation right now. There's just destroying my

pillow. Does that start? No. What do water Shetland ponies attracted to?

Well, just all the other track. I mean, once once bugs come in, then sort of wildlife gets the

message. So it's the food chain.

It's the food

chain feeding fish, right? Breathing trout, oxygen breathing, fish, walking fish, walking fish. That's right. You are in the middle of the dawn of man in there, right?

Because the dar I actually coming to my house to study? I

thought I saw. I think that is a guy with the big beat white beard that certain star

with. Sure start it might B. M. Yeah. I was over

your house the other day. End

up having a blast with the Missing link. We went out and got a couple of years. Yeah, he wanted a mixture between ah, wheat, just plain wheat. He

wanted whatever is in between wheat and beer. He's also on it

worked. He wanted the work. Yeah,

he wanted, like, half cooked like unpermitted, But

He's cool. He's hot. So you're partying with him?

Yeah, Yeah. No,

we got fucked up.

Really? Yeah.

Oh, that's awesome. The missing link now, is

he scary? Not too May e. I guess some people in the

restaurant we like

What is the restaurant cleared out? Yeah, like I'm losing my biblical faith. Oh, I should watch Israel head expose. That was you at

the old Garden Awakening? Yes. Oh, my God. Wait.

Getting a lot of atheists in the town now

because I've been running around with missing

link. It's really, like a lot lost a lot of the

faith. Church attendance is down. A couple of churches have already been, ah, been shut down and then reopened as Halloween stores. Yes, that's right. There's three different Halloween stores that popped up in church, which is Halloween.

That's great, kids. Now you could go to the Halloween stores to get your costume, stay out of my house, stay out of my closet. I don't know what it is about my house and the stuff I aware that makes you think it's scary.

You one of the most popular mass

this year around town was your face.

That's right, So

kids came in and sort of like a

plaster repair restaurant in

Paris. Your face one night with some SNL, uh, staff

members. That's right. But they got non union people. So they're getting that. I'm not getting any, like tubes in my nose to breathe out of. I'm not getting food or pee Break

right. You're part of your brain. Died when

they made that. Still got some brain in there. You wouldn't be functional,

but it's dead.

It's dead. It's

like you can

still have a tooth but need a root canal. That's a dead tooth. And it's still occupying the space you

are hearing from the ghost of my brain right now.

Yes. And I gotta say, it's the same. It's almost the exact same. I feel like you're here with us.

Thank you. A lot of kids. They're saying that the your classes are haven't changed it all either. So

yeah, I guess I'm just that good. So

how did you meet the missing? We go way were telling me that

we were on. Uh I went to chilling in the mess kind of chilled in the trash. And after in the beginning, I was like I really got to take this out. I really gotta take this out. And, you know, I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I'm gonna do it tomorrow. And it kept being tomorrow, and I'd say tomorrow again, Right? And

then you're like, Well, it's kind of

developing a certain different flavor

in here, you know what I mean? Have you called 1 800? Got junk, That number. They bring a big dumpster and they just take everything and you call 1 800 Want Joe? Yeah. What I

want junk is what I call now what has got You took it away

and come and clean up for you. But you gotta service. They

bring more try told a want junk once it started to get full. I was like,

Hey, this feels this feels like hanging out,

and then they cut your lights. And now you got some bioluminescent animals in there, right? They had a They had bigger fish underwater. Yeah. Little ships going through your trash.

Fucking I'm that guy who wrote Titanic.

James Cameron?

Yeah, which was in your living room, but around pointing at our ass. Yeah, we're shooting the next avatar in my living room just because of you know, a lot of the nature that's popping up in there is like nothing that's seen anywhere else on. Oh, so he's basing the new avatar sort of world. Yeah, it's Contra avatar.

Trash ocean, Right? And he pulled your pants down to sell your little tail,

right? That's absolutely right. And then you're not gonna believe this. Our hair touched each other, and me and James Cameron bonded. Hey was riding on my

back, and I understood everything he wanted. Well, shit, Sam, I

was think this was actually it could set,

right? Sorry. Sometimes used, I

still owe those will care about Cameron. So he's on set. But I'm

still so tied to him from

my hair's bonds, saying you did say that you staying with me was gonna be temporary, but it's sounding like you're sort of giving over more and more of your life and property to you people.

Well, yeah, the film crew is pretty much moved in there. I mean, shooting a new avatar movie is a full time job. So Guy place is pretty much a set for

Sanders, the always hearty at your new house. Still going down this week. Tonight.

Oh, yeah, right s. So there's

not space for people in my house.

Um, well, I don't know. The invite said, you know, come filthy. I don't know that me, I'm healthy. Do

you have the house urge? Is

it a haunted house, Will

you? My

Well, it seems

to be a haunted house.

It seems to be. Well, you've changed it quite a bit. And I'll be honest. I'm tired of sleeping on my couch. I would love it if I were a rager tonight at

your place. Every guys. Ah, young, every young adult. Everyone down. Uh, who? Every single adult.

We don't like this. You'll love this. A lot of the cool adults will be there. And how you've been impressing someone means well, there maybe could show the adults they got that quote unquote couch loveseat.

I wish I'd frickin known that you guys were gonna have an adult party at my house cause I'm hanging out with some kids tonight. Ah, there's like like Marco is throwing a party at his parents place. Yeah.

You ever do that with

Yeah, my nose last night, Teoh? No, there's just Mark. You Marco Polo?

Yeah. Marco Polo. He's the one that discovered the gym.

Yeah, that's right. That's right. Way added here for

a while.

That old underwear, he definitely kicked all the

people out of there and claim to this is It's right. I mean, our Jim is like, a little bit. I mean, the other day, Mother Monday was Jim Day. Was it was Marco Polo Jim Day. Yeah, and it needs to be called Indigenous Jim, you

fucked up thing. This is great on a to sell now.

Right now, it all makes sense to me. I think Marco's parents are going to be at the party at my freakin house. And I'm gonna be a Marcos house for these kids, not

Sounds like they may be invited you to chaperone or by the alcohol. I know. Like what? Postmates bringing alcohol now, But you need to show them your idea.

Yeah, I'm doing that.

Okay. Uh, what are they drinking?

Uh, the bottles and James the lentils and James bottles of James. I don't know, bottle bottles of James. They told me the code at the grocery store and get get him a 40 pack of bottles of James.

Have you done that yet? What happened?

I went to the store this morning. And that's

like Mrs Butters worth type alcohol?

I don't know. The guy laughed in my Mrs

Butterworth type ago. Yeah, like, isn't that the body look like a man named James?

Look like a man named James,

I must say, I

looked up on from a man named James and their bottles ill. Excuse me. Where's the bottles? I'll

I'll have to go back to the ABC store. Where? In Hawaii. They said I could only find it in Hawaii. So I got 1/2 a plane. Why

you were going to Hawaii to find our coffee.

I get bottles of James in Honolulu for this kid.

Couldn't find bottles of James locally, so you figured you'd fly to Hawaii. Goto

kids said they haven't and

wife like Marco said. He went on vacation and he got bottles of James in Hawaii and he told me to head back out. There have been some or

much like, the funds you tried to surf over a shark in Hawaii, and the kids kind of stopped talking to you

was that

you tried to serve over a shark in Hawaii and the kids stopped talking to you.

Yeah, you jump the shark.

That's when they started calling me the Fonds after the fact. Yeah,

so they're calling you the funds from the The thing that may famously is reference for the worst part of Happy Days.

Do you think that's the worst part of happy to its reference

for when a TV show dies? And I'm happy? That is

based on a thing. The

Fonz Day Literally jump of the chest Episode Happy days. I didn't know that was in and he jumps over a big shark. It's

the best episode people think that that that phrase is negative. What are your other

favorite episodes of TV shows my favorite ever showed? I said Shepherd. Sh age Woody, I love I love the last two episodes of Lost I Love. Um, let's see what it is like the thinking of how I met your mother. Love the ending of how I met your mother. I thought it, but I thought it button. This season, the Siri's up perfectly.

Third season of Battlestar Galactica. The

third season Battlestar Best one first two. Terrible.

Yeah, you're a big fan of everything around 2008 Writersstrike, right?

Oh, I thought it was so much such a more

digestible thing when shows only had, like, 89 episodes. And they ended abruptly like they just, like, tacked on ending onto. That's the

stuff I was writing because, you know, I was on Hollywood scabbing around that you like my work, Which again? I'm an artist. Poet a TV.

I'll be honest with you, if that's true. Yeah, right. I scab

by Angelou. I remember she went on strike when she was the poet laureate. My scab and I went in there. Um,

you take her, Roger and scabbing. I've seen you sort of been like, Oh, if they don't want are they too good for this job? I'll take

Who do these

union pricks think they are?

Because you shifted around your C. I have never seen you with so much potential to see trusted you live that I'm awake for this. What you hate about unions there. They're classically I feel like pretty good, uh, organization.

Oh, they're corrupt. They're taking the money out of big Walmarts mouth. You know, the teachers unions. Have you seen these selfish teachers trying to get living wages. It's enough that make you could make you spit in their face, which I dio, you know,

I want teacher living wages.

When Hamilton tried to unionize, I'm the one that blocked it. I was scabbing. I was teaching every class and all the teachers walked out.

Yeah, you motherfucker, You were teaching my class for me?

Yeah, and I showed that I could do it as good as anybody for half the money. I'm scabbing for uber lift thing. These guys are trying to get $30 an hour trying to get rights upset. Come on. Yeah, are honest days work an honest day's work?

I don't know what you mean. An honest day's work. That doesn't really mean anything.

We're all gonna be CEOs one day, you know, God. And when we're CEOs, we're not gonna want to pay these union losers. So you got to think like a CEO even before you are.

What? That's how I always vote. Even though I

have no money, my life is in shambles. I could use some government

steering right on the

right. On the age I vote, assuming that one day I will be rich.

You vote like sexually

satisfied Richmond with a full head of hair.

But I couldn't be more the for the life like that. Except had a

hair. Will you have you got to give up. On the whole, your hairs were. No one knows that

you're not. You're not going to vote your way into having hair, Bill, you admit it on on. I mean, when I'm worst around, of course, open with you guys, but nobody in

the world. Mississippi. Everybody, first of all, knows that several pieces they

can win. It was This is many pieces to make one sort of

your head keeper piece. Your head looks like it looks like a soccer ball.

Like a bunch of hexagons of hair. No, you can't see the lexicon of all balled up top. Yes, chicken. You cannot. Bill. I'm told her than you. Every time now I'm wearing a piece, but I still have a comb over. You can't tell that. Let's let let's just leave

it at this. We're not leaving this, but maybe there's a piece of evidence. Mia Hamm kicked your head,

and then Brandi Chastain took out for sure that celebrated in the middle of Ah,

name Megan. Rapinoe said she wasn't going to visit the White House after all. That happened

a little water. They didn't want their one of their first. Yeah, they never wanted her. No, My Listen, my head does not look like a soccer ball. Nobody kicks it into goals. Relies. I'm fooling everybody with this piece. I

saw a little 13 year old grab your head and do a front flip through.

Yeah, and all his friends, like, Wow, cool. Throw in now. Yeah, You flew in the air. You flipped. Well, well, I've been one of the best soccer balls they've ever had. I don't want to brag. I don't

want Teoh get too into this because I don't were close friends. And I don't know anything about your dating or relationships situation right now. Um, but, uh um what

do you

tell people when you go out on dates? Or what do they say when they see your hair or you married? Or what is your situation,

Dio There you They do assume I married.

Of course, seeing the had hair, they seem you're comfortable. Stay

ball. You could be trying. So with that haircut or Well,

I'm

single, okay? And I have a daughter, and I have an ex wife. Okay? I'm single and I date Okay,

So you're on. You're on the dating your about your in the world right now.

I think we're all

dating right now, right? We're all swing in Singler Singler bachelors, right? I'm open to find a spooky little love connection tonight at the haunted house.

Well, I think there's all single people gonna be there. I really Yes. It's a mixer.

Yeah, you

also could you bring home a towel? The couch in your living room that you're sleeping on is the is the bloodbath. Tonight

I need to bring home a towel. Yeah,

And while you're at it, maybe some crackers in the juice, because I'm losing a lot of blood for the couch thing. Just like the war in Iraq are

suing to my house. I

do it for real. It's supposed to

be joke stuff like you go to a store and you get crappy fake stuff. You don't do it for real. You pass it

around. Everybody is kind of like a bomb.

If if this isn't necessarily

a sex party,

but if it's if a sex party had

a, um, mankind time he kind of goes off the top. It loses teeth. Yes, yes, yes, Yeah.

Cargo hard core as faras the what this part is gonna be, um it's all, really, You know, it's all authentic for the fun. Yes, And I got a sock on

my hand that I'm shoving into people's mouths like, uh, yeah, big batch of blue choose going up right before the

Oh, yeah, Blue True is sponsoring the party. Um uh,

necessarily a sex party. But we will have Blue Chu will have callous who have. Right, but

But none of those companies

have licensed us, right? So we've got gin air, and when I say gin air, I mean, we can't generic cause the generic companies didn't also wouldn't let us happen. Exactly what

we are. Blue chewing on the Casper mattress tonight. Um, And Howard, we sent you an email. Didn't you get the email? Is what did you get the email in by

Howard, Did you get a male? I just did get one before Teoh rate in there. What is this? Make sure that he's all the same. I

don't read them. It's their

open it. Nothing happens in the open

it. Nothing happens if I open it.

Oh, that z your ass.

That's not an invite. That was just a freaking It's a video of a serene lake, and then a ghost lady flies out of it out of nowhere.

That was Todd's. Check out my forward. My

mind was a joke.

It was a joke. Okay. Is this the real ones on?

That's just be how we'd loser.

Okay, that's that feels edited it that feels that way added. Yeah, I've seen that. That was just into the booth. That was a crackling fireplace. And then a ghost man paid two

100 an hour to go to the booth.

All right. I'm not opening this 3rd 1 It's gonna be a freaky joking.

No, it's, uh you got to, baby.

Should I do the first winner of the night? But not that. Here it is. Welcome back to Dr Field today.

We're gonna be talking to Aaron Carter.

By God. That was just a clip

of Aaron Carter on Dr Phil and he screamed at the camp. Yes, that was Aaron Carter out of his damn mind

show the hard. The scariest part was the reality of someone getting famous too young and losing their grasp of of sanity.

I wasn't I wasn't judging him.

Sounds like you, fonds. Excuse

me. Sounds a lot like I'm not losing my grip. You can come to

one of the coolest sort of sex parties at your own house tonight. But no. Instead, you're hanging out with high school. Kids will have doors.

If I can get back from Hawaii and deliver the bottles of James and time, maybe I'll stop by. All right. Stop by late. Keep it going late now.

What? For? You? Yeah.

Is it hard alcohol or is it like a mixer? You don't

know, But you do. What do you think?

You're looking for? A bottle of James James.

James, I think if James is is a drink, I think it's probably got some my kind of guy on the label. Maybe it's a dark bottle on

something brown like

a wishful thinking looking, maybe a rum or some

ground with maybe a soda. You know,

maybe these kids

don't need alcohol. Maybe they're just getting a specific soda

soda called Call it Love. James Soda. bottles. It's the plural in the soda name Or the alcohol?

Yeah. Lot ALS of James.

Let's take a break. I gotta pee Pee.

Whoa! What a break! What a break! What a great deal!

That was one of the

best breaks we've

ever. I wish the audience could have heard it. Sufficient. Sufficient! Break. Enough. Yeah. Efficient And sufficient. Yeah,

well, we went from break Teoh Something that rhymes with break. We got our Yeah, Another guest in the studio. Uh, we're happy to have her here. She choked on something on water while I was talking, you could listen to her new podcast with Joel Kim Booster Urgent care. Mitre Djuhari. Thanks for being here.

You. I was joking cause

I liked the idea of something not rhyming not being able to find a word that rhymes with breaks

and breaks A pretty easy word to find a rhyme for I could think of five. Yeah,

you're basically

take fake rake make

Wow those he humiliated You talk well because you're you're one of the worst freestyles in the world When I say that is a man who can barely even say the word freestyle. Look, I've watched it. A lot of

people do Call me the, uh I wish I could remember this guy's name now. The Hamilton. Yeah, a lot of people call me Lin Manuel Miranda when I go into a cipher.

Does everybody laughed when they say

that? Because you're old people thinking, Like, how old is Alexander Hamilton? It

is because I keep shooting people. Uh, but Meacher Thanks for being here.

Thank you.

So, uh, welcome to Hamilton High School. Are you familiar with the high school? You Have you been in the town of Hamilton before?

First time.

First time thought. This is a great experience then. For you, it is. You get to see everything for the first time. Virgin eyes. Yes.

We like to tell

someone. Way always like this. Save somebody has virgin or a virgin. You know, if there's a

young woman in the

room, you should definitely say virgin. Yeah, absolutely. Man one. Everybody's thinking about it. You just got to get it out there. Get out there

like my eyes. A virgin ized.

We're old buddies working.

Use a virgin. Pure innocent. In the 1st 3 minutes of meeting in a room, I'm comfortable.

Well, we'd like to put you at ease and way.

I would say Also bring up a gun. Alright. Right before that. Right. Good, too. Oh, yeah.

Well, yeah. I'd let everyone know when they're working, rumored to have a

car. You sue people. Yeah. I'm, uh you have a temper? No. Well, I just

think the only person who's ever said that about Todd that you dressed in

Well, because I'm innocent. Virgin pure.

That is a virginal opinion toe have to trust May, uh, s urgent Care that's coming out on tomorrow, Network Tomorrow

on tomorrow, Tomorrow. And every day you're listening is our podcast is premiering

tomorrow. So no matter which day is a day before the permit will be the premier for that person that they've never heard your podcast before. Exactly. Uh and, um, it's you and Jo Kim booster. And you do advice?

Yes. Largely calling, but also online submission. If you don't want us to hear your voice

or no, in persons, though

no one person yet,

so we just think Ok, that's fine.

Why? You want

Teoh, right? You want to get right into advice, huh? You got a big piece right away Yeah,

all right. I'll take that. No

way might be able, Teoh, maybe not to put you on the spot right now, But by the end of episode, maybe we will ask you for some advice

that you give me some time to figure out what I think you need.

What makes you cause we're

all qualified. We're all really sweet.

Yes, and we all have very obvious deals. They don't run into each other, Their classic art type of, you know,

deal. Yeah,

we got to

say, I can't wait. Now,

being back at a high school, Do you like the do you get like a ah, nostalgic feeling being in a high school?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because it's so

recent. Yeah, you're astrologist when

you think about something that happened recently.

Well, I'm sorry. I don't want I don't like to guess a woman's age, but you avoid 52. Uh,

just turn

just turned while you look it. Um, but yes. Oh, look,

it don't sound it. Which is kind of my deal.

That's if you could work on your voice. You will always be young to radio audience.

This is my real voice. Oh, that's that's quite a skill. I'm sick can. Now, Can you only

say this is my real voice in your real voice that you say I

can also pretty much

just that. But I can also go.

That's okay. So you've worked on your new

voice so much, you've almost forgotten your old place. Exactly. OK, there's

a lot of there was a lot of age behind that high More than anything else. That was a good hope.

I'm not gonna weigh in at all for the rest of the

I know, it's quiet.

Comfortable enough with what is inside of your mind and heart that just talking won't hurt anyone's feelings or make them uncomfortable.

Yeah, and whatever I say after is my choice.

Yeah, yes, it iss. But So, um, because I

walked into high school and you know, the freewheeling joy of the students, you know, with the world gets you down after some time. So I do get nostalgic to see kids just not knowing what's ahead of them.

By now, they're about to get hit by a truck and they don't even see the headlights. They're looking in the other direction.

That's exactly how we feel about life. And Sam has done that, uh, hits the one with the truck. Yeah.

Yeah. And been hit by a truck. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not safe on the road at all. That's his

deal. Thinking data. That's the deal. That's radio clear. Specific. What would you say

is your deal? You have this podcast that we use Give advice. What qualifies you to give advice?

Nothing. But I think that is what makes it fun. Right. Okay. Because you could go somewhere where it makes sense to get good advice. But then if you're calling in yeah, you know, you are entertaining advice, right? You want you want to loud people screaming about themselves and then eventually remembering that there's a question that way

Give advice the same way. Yeah, because I get my advice. Growing up on my sex advice was Adam Corolla based, um, and now still Adam Corolla based advice. So,

you see, get you sick at his vice cell.

Oh, absolutely. I love what the eighth man's got dish. Uh, so I'm interested what other people's advice would be. Do you think most people will be calling in with, like, relationship advice?

A lot of relationships that

you've recorded Someone

reported a few. Joel is very physically fit. Um, I hope I don't get crucified for saying that. Uh, and that's

what that's what The Jesus down. Oh, yes. It was too hot for the Jews.

That's less jealous.

Ellis crucified Jesus and sexy body We all know. So make it up on the cross

And that tan

Oh, my God, They're jealous.

They're gel us.

It's sad,

but you will get crucified for Central has a sexy body.

Yeah, he has a sexy body. And he I would say the two of us get a lot of fitness questions. How spoiled little bit and say that I do personally handle all fitness questions on the podcast because, like, you know, you can look up a good workout, but I can tell you what I think. A good workout iss. OK,

Do you have ah, a lot of experience with different types of workouts?

No, no. I

mean, I've been working out on I typically lift. Yes, Todd. Uh, e I don't know if you could tell, but I usually lift heavy and with the back eyes that straight legs very straight legs and then pull your breath. Yes. Hold your breath.

Your last physical when you turn And Kaufer Hernia. You blew your doctors handoff right out. What is your, ah, workout routine?

I will occasionally play soccer, and I will occasionally do a spin class. And then, um, the other 362 days of the year.

So you get advice from someone who has heard of two workouts to start with an s on. Then you chill for the rest and kind of let your muscles regrow.

Yeah, because I'm you know what I'm doing That stuff. I'm like, I'm at it all day, and then you're supposed to have a break, Period.

You say recovery is the most important part of fitness. You have to let your body recover, because if you beat yourself down into the ground, you you won't want to do it again the next day you will be able to do it the next day.

And I find myself often not able to do it the next day

because you've gone so hard for 24 straight hours on soccer. Or or spend spin. Which spin? Is that what it sounds like?

You're on a bike No, no,

no, no. You're just that you're on a bike and you're riding around the track, or

I do a stationary bike. That's like a for example, Like the Soulcycle class or flywheel class or something. So you've got sort of like a woman who looks a lot better than you screaming at you in the dark for you to work hard.

Oh, we're

in a diverse

crowd. My marriage.

Yeah, that's good motivation. The dark work hard.

Yeah, but I find that I don't do either. Well, be in the dark or work hard. Both

make you cry. Well,

we'll put that down on

the thing that is that this man has been hit

by a car and also hits

people with his car. And he does bad in the dark.

And we've definitely hinted at my thing. And someone

just shown itself

so I know

it's on you already. Don't worry.

Here in our high school, P e is mandatory. Was that a situation in your high school?

Yes, but if you were a nerd, you could do summer, Jim. Summer, Jim. Yeah. So I took gym in the summer so I could take more a p classes.

Wow, that is nerdy.

Doesn't that you tell Jim during the year

I did not take Jim during the year. I did it over the summer. Um, And fun fact, my math teacher 11 of my years of school came and visited my summer gym class to say hi. Familiar,

actually. Does that you was my deal. Guys, you check

in on students years later.

Yeah, I I

got lunch with a student of mine from six

years

ago last week. Wow. That's

nice to keep those relationships. Did he come in? Could you tell you? Kind of prepared himself, like, showered that morning, Put on his best outfit?

Yeah. This is a guy who would play with my hair in the hallways. So nothing but intention.

It's time to play fake first or fake. Third

person. We've tried to play this with everyone's refused. We're talking about a real person Now, this math teacher, would you like to say his full name? But But what? Either the first or last can be fake. Now, So far, no one has. Darcy Garden has said no, thank you. Askgreta title men big. Would you like to be the first person to play fake first or fake last and out part of this teacher's

name. I actually don't know the first name, so I don't think I can play.

Uh, be no another pass. I will tell

you later, but right, you're looking up

mascot Summer, Jim, Is this the whole summer school thing, or would you come in the morning for life Chinese history and then come in for Jim? After that,

you could come for let you do for, like, two weeks, and you do, like, four hours a day or something. You do the morning chunk of the afternoon chunk

and you get it done in two weeks.

You get it done in two weeks and you want to

take a school that this is an ad for some Very interesting because the whole thing

with physical education in schools is they want to keep kids moving. They know they don't get. They think when kids are in school, they need to stay healthy by moving sort of consistently daily. This sort of philosophy is not just do it all in two weeks. Good for the year.

Yeah, which explains your current workout plan.

Yes. Put it all? Yeah. So I learned a lot of really valuable lessons in high school.

That's what it is. It's not the classes, necessarily. But it's the lessons in the habits we learned. That's what's important about high

school foundation time. Exactly. Yeah,

well, I would like to maybe get some advice from you. I mean, if that is the podcast and you feel not good at it, but that you're gonna do it in the future, maybe we could roll around and I'll take a piece of advice. Yeah. So mine. I can't seem to hold down or relationship with the wife. Um,

many. There have been many.

Yes. Yeah. It seems that once marriage happens, I, uh, some that she does something and becomes less interesting. Um, and I'm I start getting wandering eye, which you've heard about and stand up and stuff. Let's get the wandering on,

fellas. It the wondering eye. It's hard to meet, Understand? Because I just don't like not seeing the world from that

perspective. Total is. But

I dio

So what would you say is good piece of advice to deal with that wandering deal with

the wondering eye. Well, what initially attracts you to your various partner.

Um uh, Let's see. I think that they you know that I feel like I, um they will you have an answer for this? They like me at first, Which feels really nice

that Okay,

someone liking you feels really nice.

And do you like them before they like you?

Well, you know them. They're you. They're attract, sweating and, uh,

getting really read. Look

at me when you talk to me.

You know, I contacts never been one of my strong suits on, you know, as an actor. That's the thing I'm working on. But, uh, what was the question?

My question was, what attracts you to your wives?

Guilty. Guilty?

Be what you e I

don't I feel like I've been grilled right now.

You are being

You know what attracts me to my wife?

Guilty as being attracted to your wives

job may, uh,

been caught. So you are attracted

to your wife? Yes. What one traveler said

they're nice to merely on which feels really good,

you know?

And sometimes when I when I'm talking there like that, you know, they're there listening. And would they?

So it's sort of about your experience of them and nothing to do with them.

Well, no. But there's also, you know, you know, it's nice to have someone to see a film with a flick.

Okay, So there next to you and

they hear you

good does from And, uh,

it's really important that someone could hear you in a relationship.

Uh um, I think I'm getting a

in the light. I get a call. You

know, the way the light back there. You've been great, truh. Now, where do we not done? I guess

I wanted advice where I didn't have to reveal anything about myself.

Right now.

This is like therapy Again.

I got like,

I want you to tell me about me.

And like, How long do you normally a stick with a therapist? Do you think you

know it's so hard? It's really hard.

It is hard. It's really Do you tell the truth to therapists?

I don't talk a lot in therapy. You let

them talk of their time.

It's their time. And I kind of say, like, What do you think about me? What? You know, I always

want to

know what other people think about me.

that's that's a

bummer, because because because you can't always be thinking about that I mean therapies your time you're paying for it. Uh, use it.

Well, I'm kind of paying to know why people, Because if I talk too much about myself, I'll be I'll kill myself.

Now that I understand, I get it. I have both eyes with that.

All right, That's empathy, right?

Empathy Dio, I don't know. OK, so I think that we've made a real

breakthrough. Time to move on, move on.

I feel like I really, really got somewhere. Thank

you. So from so

many of

what Todd said, could you give him a piece of advice?

What I would say is make a list of things that would attract you to another person that actually have things to do with their personality and even their physical attributes, and have nothing to do with the way that they interact with you on Lee based on your performance for them,

that's interesting. That's interesting.

But also, I would say, keep doing exactly what you're doing is it seems

like it's gonna be Oh,

you sound a lot like my therapist.

Let me ask

you a question. So I feel like most of my life is involved. I like what I do. I like being a teacher and a coach. So

a lot of my life, What do you teach?

So you coach any coaches, basketball,

coach, basketball? So ah, lot. I feel like a lot of my social life or I have fun at work. So most of the things I do our work or it's a work function, or it's like I feel like I'm getting out of my house because I'm doing work things. But I really I think I need some type of hobby Should I don't love going outside. I'm frustrated by musical instruments. Frustrated? Yeah, they I don't get good at them fast enough.

How long do you give yourself to get good at them?

Couple hours until my back hearts like I usually play an instrument

like my back hurts. My back hurts now from playing guitar on, but it also feels like, Why am I doing this? If I'm not gonna play it somewhere and then I'm like back toe work again, I'm like, Oh, with this, I can use this for work, so I'm not doing it for fun, right? You know what I mean? And I feel like this in every aspect of my life, I'm wasting time. Unless it leads to work.

I get that. I I'm just crying

eyes. Is

there a way to maybe do activities strictly for inspiration? But

see, now I'm back

to work. I'm looking for inspiration just simply for doing that.

I think there is that something that I really struggle with. Yeah, I'm taking a class next month. Okay? Taking a pottery class so cool. And I know that I'm going to be bad at it. I'm historically very bad at art. Uh, historic in my life. The things that I try to make look really bad visually right? I have no sort of understanding of Like if I do this, it's gonna look like this. Or wouldn't it be interesting if the thing was shaped like this Have no imagination in that sense. So excited to take a pottery class and be ok with being bad? You try something that you know you're gonna be badda I would like

to be able to cook better.

Okay, So take a cooking class or get recipe book. You don't have to go outside. That's true. Followed the recipe. Yeah, And then if they're bad

Oh, well, no, I don't get humiliated. Nobody's coming over their bank unless Nasty. Yeah, no one. And then you can order pizza if you don't like it,

right? That's sure

if you like pizza. It seems like you might be, because if I'm bad at

something, I will kill myself.

So now we're two for two.

And I would say we're

about to be three for three

on people in this podcast. Right playing. I

will say my therapists have all told me that I'm too narcissistic. 10. My own life. Um, so I wouldn't worry if I were you.

Okay, so I guess for you, I would say Don't go to therapy so you can stay as bad as you are. So how about you stay alive?

Oh, yeah. I'm like, early Marc Maron,

Baby, that's great advice. That's great advice. Thank

eso. Once again, people hosting my podcast are not qualified to dispense

real advice. E feel

like I'm urgent care right now Like I feel this is the experience of it is I was panicked a couple minutes ago. Now I feel like I got a little salve. You know better than these other losers. An urgent care.

People like saying, like, Stop coming back. We're not going to give you pain pills.

Come on. I would get shot like this fucking guy.

It does feel great to go spend a little time in the urgent care lobby. You pretty strong by comparison. Oh, you go there to brag. Yeah, well,

not brag, but you're sort of go. Yeah, I'm doing pretty good. Okay. Air sucks. Yes. Near. I don't want them

to feel bad. I just want to feel good sneer sneers

here that I like. What, Like Brad? Smoggy like the sneer is fun. Scott, Stopping

the words about looking at people funny is great. Yeah, a lot of good words. Any advice needed over here? Should we move on?

I don't think so. You know, I'd love some advice. Like my father is not well who I am sweating. But I am stressed.

Yes. Hot room.

Um, no, don't be

a fool. A sad people. I do think they will

read transcripts of this podcast at one of our trials. Yes, I do genuinely believe that

your character witness. Yeah, I mean, I think it is looking like theater on what? Everybody here, I'll

jump in here and I'll tell you this. I have never been suicidal a day in my life. So let's start at the Dauth. I know there's not been a single day

I ever seen a sneer in

my life. I'm I I like to call

myself a very happy person. Okay, I'm very excited. I like talking

to you. Make e like talking to

people, like spending time with people. I think sometimes my personality is a little bit too in your face to Maybe you could call it clingy. I get I get people excited. And then and then they're like, Oh, this is too much. This is like a dog that won't stop licking my face like, Get out! Get away from me. What? What? Maybe you have some advice for somebody who maybe sometimes comes on a little bit too strong with new friendships, new relationships, something like that. Like, because I'm not gonna I don't know how to stop it.

And to be clear, he is saying he does lick people's face. It's not That's not a we're gonna kiss. It's Yeah. What your

gonna kiss? So this is before the

kiss. You like The fate of Second are clean with the first castle would be nice. It has to be clean

tonight. I always ask, Can I like your face before we kiss?

And what did they say? Yeah, eso I would say, um, you can You can maybe spend more time looking people's body language. Really? Listen and see if they see if you feel like they mean what they're saying,

that's a good thing. So it's

like you're so far back from further back your arms or cross your

right. This means you want to stay this body language.

Yeah, I want I want to turn. And unfortunately, the listeners won't be able to hear this, But I just want to show the hosts what I've been doing to the back of a chair,

huh?

Okay. Gripping it very tightly, holding it so hard as if she's on a roller coaster. Also take also taking

time to just get a little further away from us and show us her back. Just make sure that we're not close.

Yeah. A lot of people won't show me their back because they feel threatened or challenged by me. That was nice. That was trusted.

Yeah, I have enough trust to know that I will probably not get attacked from behind

while I'm in this room. Well, thank you. It's nice to throw a nice compliment. I

was really nice. Thank you.

I think that the first time anyone's ever said

that to me. Yeah, it's really nice.

So you're cleaning read people's body language better now. What is that? What is like So what are some

signs? I can look for that besides the ones you showed me, cause I've never seen exactly this exact thing you just showed us. I've never seen that before. So

but think

about like what you do when you're uncomfortable. Uh, if you see somebody doing that, maybe take stock in that slow,

right? So if they if they airport in their cup of coffee and they're kind of responding with just hugs and okay, it's like, Oh, wow is not really engaging in conversation. That probably means they don't want to talk to him anymore.

Or you could just

ask him a question about themselves or what they're interested in or what they want to do or something like eso

instead of coming at him with. I have had a crazy week Come out with a Have you had a

crazy week? Exactly. Oh, that's

simple. That's like two different words.

That's a great starter question.

Hey, if you had a crazy were they and have fun, So let's try it. Okay? Me?

True. Do you think your outfit looks really cool?

No. Okay, I love my office. I picked

out this outfit at the, uh, J crew

now the jaker D J

crew. What's up? D j Crew,

D J crew?

Oh, D J crew Crew? Yeah, lots of techie. Sort of turntable. Easton.

Yeah. As you can see, the top is kind of Ah, see through fishnet. Sure. It's like a neon green mesh. You

going somewhere after this?

Um, you know, you never know if you're gonna end up at a party or a rave or where they're blasting your

pants. A Calvin hair Harris on

Calvin Hairless

Calvin Hairless s. So this is, like, sort of a parody. This is like Spencer's gifts. I thee often deejay

my body laser er gives the pants to you afterwards. Is kind of an advertisement.

That's really nice. Thank you.

I love free stuff.

Thank you. Yeah.

Thank you. What would you like to ask us for some advice. Also, I would Is there

something you've been working on or thinking about? That you that you're curious what our perspective would be.

Well, I feel like I'm a huge workaholic, and I'm trying to slow down, and I am having trouble doing so because I like work a lot. So similar toe bills set up. But that's my thing right now.

Yeah, I have no advice because I'm in the same and yeah, I think it's gonna be a struggle for May, because I I do, I guess. Um yeah, it work does feel like I do feel calm when I'm at work or doing work. Yeah, And when I'm not, I feel anxious. Like I teach just like Dio. Yeah, I go to the beach and I'm like, Why don't we do and like, we should do this? What is What is this?

What's it's It's beach. So it's like, stand, It's

water. Fish. Yeah. Maybe doubling down on relationships

totally focus the

work stuff on another person

s so keeping, keeping it all external.

Yeah. Don't look in one way, Okay. Doubling down on relationships. Even if they're good or not, just double

down on him.

Okay, great. This sound good or unhealthy? Definitely Good and unhealthy. I would say it sounds it more attractive to me than rebuilding the foundation. Right. So

have you write sabotaging your work opportunities, then you can't go to them anyway. Oh, and then you have sabotaged self sabotage. Other people sabotage.

Any suggestions on how to go about that?

Um, find what your employer doesn't like and then do that thing. Okay, mean tweets? Um, garbage

is your lawyer dislike mean tweets?

Yeah, Well, no, they're actually huge fan admit mean tweets, cause they love that segment on Jimmy Kimmel.

Oh, yeah.

Jimmy Kimmel. You're

looking to come and read the tweets about themselves, Hopefully, like, they're hoping right around

my my produced. My my boss does not work at Kimmel, but they love that segment. And they love the idea of mean tweet.

My boss loves when you take little kids Halloween candy away and make them cry.

That bit is classic,

classic camel.

My boss loves going to war with the speaker of the

House Ways, I think laughing. I

think I think for me is I was a big workaholic when I was the most trying to avoid my wife and daughter on. I don't know if those were related, but is there something in your life? You know, my wife, my daughter, that you're trying todo around

my daughter? I don't know. Your wife and honor.

I mean, either anymore. Yeah. On

how far back are we talking with this particular wife and daughter? How many wives ago?

This is three wives ago. One daughter. So the only daughter. Uh oh, everybody. Oh, well, sympathy. But it's okay. I really love my daughter. I think about her all the all the time. I was like, Mary, I think that's her name. I miss you and you know so. But maybe that's what it is. Or sometimes work, you know, is a way to express anxiety. Do you think it might be that? Are you anxious person? Definitely. I

know. I seem like so laid back. Uh, yeah, very anxious.

So maybe it's about but

now I feel bad about damn work. Now I feel damn bad about damn word

like you're anxious about

it. Yeah, like work doesn't

even make me feel good now because I'm like, Oh, I'm just working to escape other things

You could be. You like it and you're doing it

right. Okay, that's true. That's true.

Yeah, they're not mutually exclusive. Wouldn't you

find yourselves reaching results at work? Do you get happy or do you want to do the next day? Like do you? Are you ever

happy with work? At last? It lasts about the same time is like, you know, like some some burnt toast. Yes. You know, it's like that Rest thanks. And air. And there's, like, 30 minutes late. Like I don't even think Rosie burnt toast in here.

I would say my happiness lasts for one minute and then the And when I feel like I've done a bad thing at last for much longer doesn't matter how. Yeah,

the bad thing that lingers, the bad thing linger. Bad feeling really linger.

So I might suggest Teoh to find ways to be less results oriented in your work. Like once I accepted that all my players were gonna be panned, um, and walked out of canceled early never funded called crap called crap. Put t

reviewer someone just calling it crab. That battery out

to pasture. That was a

bad reviewer. Thank you. Unfortunately, the review after that was very thorough in specific. All the ways it was crap. I agree. Better use a better word. Use a synonym dot com, but maybe finding a way to make it about the joy of doing the drive the peace. Really? That's good and less about what is gonna happen when the work is done. On what? The result of it feels really good in.

That is great. A

pretty sage moment from Todd.

Yeah, they had to be a man literally crumbling. That was pretty good. Physically, Mentally spiritually. Hair, skin.

Oh, yeah. They say your body matches your inner life, and I do have that garnaut. But yeah, I'm just saying that cause the therapist told me that right before I inspired him Mitre, Thanks for being here through the advice.

Thank you for the advice. We're excited. Virgin care. Thank you.

Any emails from our email addresses? We'd love to hear real advice. We just sent you. We just sent you an email. That was the email says Emails being sent.

Okay, someone's had a future. And Foley, thank you

so much for being here. Really? Appreciate. Again. Urgent care premieres. It'll be tomorrow. Yeah,

October 30 for over 30. Berkey released way

more police on the creepiest days

way sending over while I was thinking

and sexualized and you are covered head to toe in the night before Christmas gear

s very huge,

Tim Burton. I'm mostly I like to think of myself as steampunk first comedians.

That's so cool. And you

do think those things go together?

Yeah. You wrote in here on

a really tall bike and could not get off fell just sideways.

And I'll say these guys had some

pretty mean shit to

say about my monocle. And look who's laughing now. I see the best at everybody in here.

I guess I just don't know how a monocle can also be playing goggles.

Why? Oh, sorry. I guess I don't lack imagination.

Oh, my God. Roasted. He's an artist.

Shot your ass, Todd.

Eso and my boots each way. 20

e Also, I guess I do

work out. I work. I have £40 of boots on it all times. right. Leather coats

on everywhere I walk, floor length. So that's a great piece

of advice. The steampunk workout.

Yes. Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah. Looks like a heads really meant putting your head to work.

Yeah. I mean, I have, I would say, a swell rods in my neck That's so

steampunk. Just like pit working

there, Assistant, there, there, there, sort of steam powered pistons.

And while you're dressing the way to do is everyone doing that work after? Listen to crap you're listening

to. That's just a bonus. It is just a

bonus. Mostly people request that I don't force that for Is my religion on other people?

Okay, I see. It's a real really You're doing kind of Your body is like a

big old cloth, and then all the disciples are a little bat. Still live inside the clock. Cool. Yeah, Communion

is you eat the dust from inside the clock. It's modeled after Christianity, but it is worse.

Well, im glad to get that

little piece of your personality out there.

Forgot to mention that that at the

beginning is played

immediately to us in the room.

You don't have because people see you and it has to come up. They have to

talk, which is so

fucked up like I don't do that when you're wearing a T shirt,

but it's true. It feels a little different. Your feels a little

more like a something. You put a lot of choice and effort into.

Oh, so you don't put any choice, No effort when you wear

Look at him. I

mean, I wasn't thinking anything. That's why it took them so long to see my back. Because I don't lift up all the

jacket, right? Yeah.

I felt like it was like Morpheus going into a chiropractor.

Let's do another

20 minutes. Now that we found this steampunk

theme stuff

is better. Thank you for being here.

Thank you.

Have a wonderful life

thing. Obviously, if you guys are free after this, I am screening Tim Burton's entire catalog in the Hollywood Forever cemetery.

Wow, that sounds like, uh,

thing. Everybody. Thank you so much for tuning into the teachers lounge. As always, we're efficient where we were appreciate it way really appreciate it. And until next time, say lippy