frickin uber too good to their employees.

Well, yeah, that companies got They've got to start dogging these employees because my right over here, I just too

cushy. He doesn't have it hard enough.

You this guy, you could tell. He added a little too easy.

Well, made to say that. I mean, was he like wasteland?

Exactly. Whistling, giving me the like, High five on the way. And I was just like, Hey, maybe you should not just not get health insurance, but you should be given someone else. Health insurance to have to drive. Uber is too much and you know my opinion. Scabs and will scab. I will scare love this can. Yeah,

they let him drive their own cars and they're too nice. I don't want my driver's sit in a nice leather chair like that. No, I know that I'm in a leather chair as well, but I should be feel fancier.

Yeah, so you think that they should guess you have the back seat, but they should let

that's what's nice. Grab you can tell in a cab. It's nasty upfront in front of the plastic, but in the back, it's one smooth piece of leather.

I wouldn't say I've ever been to a in a cab that I would classify the backseat as nice

as compared to the front.

I guess that's true. I've never been in the front of a cabin.

Oh, it's that big long seat with no stitching in it, Uh, somehow totally flat front, you know, Outback back. Um, you got cop car vibes? Um, if

you're trapped, which is Yeah, there's no

indentation in the seating at all. So if we're taking a left turn your shooting over to the right, you're going forever.

You will slide its's. Yeah, it's a little slick.

It mimics what it's like at home for me. Which is I get to watch 32nd clips of the cooking segment from the Today show.

Yes, and you know, in an uber it's just too fancy in there. It's too fancy the drivers too comfortable. They feel entitled. I can't sandal the entitlement of

my most tired of the cars being like 2010 and above. Can

I get in like

a 74 Volvo? I

need something with 400,000 miles more.

Smell

like diesel when I

get out, Like I liked like there's uber uber X uber excel. How about uber last leg over its For On it It's It's free

now that I can afford

you pay, but it is.

Danger is very dangerous. You

pay in the years of your life. You give up just by breathing the air of the inside of the car, the fear of it. And obviously, if it's that type of car, we are blasting Judas Priest whole ride.

Maybe we got Dek Shepherd upfront, driving pedal. The metal here had settled the matter. Now that

uber driver, I would tip

pedal to the metal.

But he's also talking to you about your deepest, darkest secrets. Yeah, he's

recording is podcast.

Yeah, he's doing arm share

expert, but he's speeding you down the highway and were both crying.

There's a five point harness. He's one of those chunky seatbelts. Yeah, it takes 40 seconds to put on

your belt, singing, frozen on the passing, Your say that this is good.

Yeah. Do you like that? Cause I My biggest frustration in an uber is when they ask me what music I want to listen to those I want him to kind of put on a show for me. I want to get in there and I want one for us. Perform for me play But

you're That's what I'll say You give me your original Give me

your hits and give me a little white lifesavers Give me your hits and give me the white knight

Usually wrapped white like

Give me the hoods and little wide lifesavers I

want to get lost in your uber

eyes That original

Uncle cracker. I love that original argue cat Uncle Cracker

Way. I'm glad you made a school day, Todd, not you Not

know. Just be honest. I didn't do the assignment for my theater class today so that you desire Well, my assignment is to show up with something for the class to do every day, you know? And I just didn't do it last night, and I'm

worried that you have been winging it all the time. It's like you're pretty improvisational in your teaching Stein.

No, I like it to look that way, but it's a lesson plan. Yeah, there's always a lesson plan in there. So when you hear me Erman and Arman in there, that's playing. That's all playing

Berman and Arman.

Yeah, the It's like heaven and harm, but it's the padre Copyright. Okay,

you got a whole book of these phrases. Yeah, Autism's.

Yeah, Urban's and Armand's. It's called our ERM in an armchair expert. And yeah, it's also, if you can dio

tell Amit. Alright, everybody, welcome to another episode of the Teacher's Lounge. The first, best and only podcasts Jane issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community. I, of course. And Howard, get over here. Levis. So your biology teacher

is that scorpion from Mortal Kombat?

Yeah, that's my new nickname. The kids at the table have ah, again, Chris and me with a what? 4/14 nickname. Your

bonds. You were What was it? Heavy thighs. It

was heavy levy, heavy thighs. How

many of these nicknames were given to you and how many of them were proposed by you to the kids?

Uh, well, this one was given to me by the kids because we were playing Mortal Kombat. Ah, and ice plant Scorpion. And the only special move that I remember is to get over here, and it really, really made Ah, uh, Marco really pissed

market. When you do a get over here and you yank him to you, and then you got no move on.

And it's it's Get over here.

High mountains a upper.

Get over

here. Hi. Punch and then Oh, yeah Then they get the high kick low kick sweep on They do the little rate in Ah, back forward, Forward That hit you with your hands. Hate it when Hansel shooting lightning at you

on the kids are saying they want to kill you on spikes in real life as well.

Yeah. And they tried. Yeah. You guys know the big the big hole out by on the soccer pitch?

Oh, yeah, that they know the big

hole. That's what I pay my taxes to not fill that hole. Yeah, we're not feeling

well. I was out there the other day. I looked in there, and there is now a bad a spikes underneath their and I realized that we were were out there playing a little soccer in a brake on, and they kept trying to get me to go over there and yeah, there I finish me.

Yeah, they didn't have the heart to finish you because I saw you sort of days

so I was I was sort of going around. I was spending they had punched me a bunch

and I lied. I open my outdoor classroom door to make eye and finishes at. They didn't have

the heart to kick it out on the spikes, which

shows a little

bit of her more.

Yeah, I appreciate it. So they gave me a nickname instead. So now I'm Howard. Get over here. Levis on. Of course I teach biology.

Well, my name is Sam. Sexy Sam Silver. Sammy Weatherman. Hard to understand at this point what my real name is, uh, teach drivers at and also SP, which is student government. Just trying to teach the kids what they need to know to flourishes. Young adults that's a driving licences had to be leadership.

That's I mean, those are two very important that you

let him

be real. Those are the two things you need. You have a driver's license in the ability, ability to lead. You'll be fine.

Absolutely. I always tell the kids, if you are not legally allowed to drive, life is gonna be tough taking for me. I am not legally allowed to drive and life is tough.

Yeah. You're a huge inconvenience for all your friends.

I need I'd every

You're constantly in that post d u I phase where we have to. Your friends have to drive you around.

Yeah. Yeah, it's terrible. Well, and the worst part was I never even earned it. I never even had a drunk Dear fun. The

fun night of a d u I get the good part. I didn't get to go

out and party and hit someone on the way home and trouble. I just got to get around

it. Well, hi, Bill. Crave e basketball coach and social studies teacher. Hot off of a big loss in both of those on court and in the

clear social studies lost this year, huh?

Big loss way

you want to do with the game? First of the social studies One.

Well, you know, it's it's tough to lose in a classroom. It is? Yeah. Um, against students. Contentious relationship.

I was up

at half time in the class. Um, yeah,

it was all You just lost your head in the second half, but all you had to do was not blood.

Yeah, I was reading the overhead.

That's all I had to Dio and I freaked out, Um, at the overhead with the dry erase marker Started a scribbling off some stuff. Forgot the for the 31st president. Ah, yeah. Yeah, well,

I'm the kids started dunking on you. I mean, the banking on you both verbally and physically. They came up, took the overhead projector slide, crumpled it up, dunked it on

you. Yeah, some kid, uh, set a pick on me when I was trying to get back to my desk for the lettuce implant. Lesson plan. Hit hard, right? Just ahead. Um, I went down, Could not get the lesson plan. And when I came back up, I could not get back on my feet. And they had taken over by the end of the class. They were not looking at the book. They were passing. No. I

heard you got a 54 on the test that day.

I did. They make you take the test? Yes. Before I know it, there's 24 kids behind the podium and I'm sitting by myself in one of the desks and I am humiliated. And

then it turned into a sex ed class. Yes. And you went way downhill for you there.

Way down here, Hill. Because as soon as it like, it's a sex ed class, I screamed out. What if you can't get it up? I screamed that out. It was it was in volunteer right from my gut. And they were like,

What do you mean,

Mr. Kray? B and I went down a long story about how I'm having e d. Um, Sorry, Kyle. Dysfunction. Yes, Yes. Uh, and, uh, yeah, it was It was a big loss. And also, um, on the court loss as well, against the much less interesting If we're the Gatewood Patriots went down hard. Yeah. Um and that was screamed out about my wrecked out earlier in the game. Teoh. Yeah,

tough week for you. Credit shot,

Two big losses, losses. But I like that you're taking pride in, um, something that a lot of men deal with, you know, and there's a lot of shame around it, and it's an issue. Ah, lot of men, it's mental. Some men, it's physical. On some men, it's insanity or both, or whatever.

And I think you're right. We need to take back the pride of way. Take

back the pride of our total dysfunction

way. Shame the shapes Gotta start going on

our partners A little more stuff because we're holding on to so much of the pain.

My direction is a two way street.

This shit is your fault. This shit is your fault. Get me up. But get my get me up Tonight you go to sleep

with your back to me crying about that Okay?

Have you ever noticed the unbalanced nature of this thing? I'm always crying, facing the wall and you're always sitting there looking at me. It's crazy because

I had my experiences that people have different partners. But for me it's women. Women are so emotional. I always end up crying with the soft

peters At the end of the night on it's like, you know, it is just it is ah, manner from

Mars. Women are soft Penis

which, by the way, you've been shopping that book around

have been are soft Phoenix This is all about women, Overmars Men are self fetus. Why is it that Okay? You know I will take first thing. Okay, First time for take constructive

criticism there. It's just I would have to do a big find and replace on the typewriter.

I could see how someone

would be so turned off by the title of this book. They don't even give you a note on the title like they

don't even they don't even just like you know what I was thinking

about the title there, Just like out. You out out.

Yeah, it's tough to read. Women are soft Penis. I think if that's ever publish, it will definitely be a worst seller.

Well, I'm hoping the cover

draws the eye before the title. The cover Our is ah,

sort of cartoon, right?

Yeah, it's a cartoonish, placid women, uh, and then a man with little Martian years on. So it's kind of funny, and

you're giving it to both Equally

Absolutely, absolutely. I'm an equal opportunity, but it's not about insulting anyone. You know, I I use a lot of what I've learned from Esther Perel. Um, you know, psychologist, therapist, whatever she might be, Um, and it's a lot about, you know, listening and exploring and accepting people's problems, and we're she and I differs. Then we start to point the finger in my book a little more. Uh, once

you have a problem and you know the answer. Might as well try to solve

absolute. Don't just sit there. Absolutely. Take some ownership, ladies. Todd Padre, Theater teacher. Feminist. Uh, and, uh, right now, of course, working on the performance for the global warming winter formal. Yeah. And working on the halftime show. And, um, preparing obviously the Hanukkah play for December. We're doing all Jewish theme plays this year to educate the students. A

lot of people think you've got too many sort of creative things on your plate right now that you can't give enough focus to any of them. I would say I'm one of them.

You didn't do your homework last week.

Yeah. No, it's true. I am spread a little thin, but that's okay, cause I'm trying to lose a few pounds, but actually, I am. I haven't been sleeping very well, and I'm very anxious, but I think I could pull these off. I do think that the Jewish play the hot winter formal show the hot halftime show Winter formal. And obviously, I did you guys know this? I've always been ah, huge fan of, um uh riding around in competitive uh, what is this thing called? Hoverboard races. So I used to do it now. Well, you

always been into that? Yes, I've heard of it whatsoever. Board

hoverboard. You know, it's hoverboards. I think the thing that you stand on and you kind of lean forward and back and it moves for you. Oh, a Segway Segway, but without the top part that you hold.

Oh, yes. Okay. One wheel. The one with

one wheel. You

a brand new interest

of yours? No, I've been into this for a long time, is what I'm saying. So I'm obviously still doing that, Uh, your scraped up bad. Oh, so the listeners know you're very Yeah, sure. I think I put my mosquito net a prawn.

These air road rash these are using road races. Makes you think it's a hoverboard.

Have one thick sort of rubber stripe down your body like your own hoverboard skidded over. Yes.

No, no. I think it might be the mosquito on that. Like I said, Oh, are tied. First

of all, why are you putting a mosquito net up every night? If that's really your excuse? What? Why are you putting a mosquito net? up every night. It's the winter. They're all dead. All the mosquitoes air dead.

Maybe in your house. They're driving in mind standing what they go. They go to Todd's house for the

winner. You can get hot enough. And there's standing water.

Yes, he lived in the south into town. It's really like a retirement community for mosquitoes. They're riding around little golf carts in there. They're fucking each.

They've also found that I'm whatever the opposite of Apex predator is. I don't have the strength to kill one with my smash.

Your in Apex host picks house you that you're the most viable option for a bunch of mosquitoes to live off.

That's right. And you know, it's Ah, my. It's obviously my areas, the malaria area. And so there's a lot of thriving will area there. Um, no, I've also

you're really scraped up and your butt bumpy as hell from mosquitoes.

Yeah, that's all the same thing. If you're suggesting that I fell off my hoverboard when I was racing a YouTube celebrity, uh, suggesting it, but I'm interested now. Then the hoverboard rolled over my body way.

Think dead body?

Yeah. Are you dead? Come clean

right now. You did. You guys were on the fence? No. Okay, wait to leave. Well, I guess we, uh Todd, look,

I don't go is if you can get away with something, huh? It's Todd Dad and said you're not Dad.

No, no, of course.

No. Okay. Hey, Todd, you know, we really do need you. You turned away and you pull your I could see you pulling your shirt collar. Looking at your reflection in the window.

Your How about being are you being

so animated that you're getting away with death when you're dead? Must gotta be alive.

I must not be dead. That's crazy. That's in here and talking when I would be legally considered dead because I rolled over myself with my own hoverboard while trying to raise Logan. Paul.

OK, ok, well tied. We really do need you at tip top shape.

So you got through that line, we're

going to just move on from that tied. But we do need you answer on fire, rip it

because you're a liar. Liar. I think that's why

I thought that was fake. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Taught you're hanging by a telephone wire right now. Don't step on. Don't step on that crack down there. Your mother's on her deathbed. Do not What is it?

Hello. No, no, no, I don't. I'm not their next of kin. So I can

pay for that. I

thank you for hes. So Tom is dead and lying about it. So is Todd dead? He's pants caught on fire. Then he was hung up from a telephone. Po came down, stepped on a crack, broke his mom's back. The doctor said, Can you pay for it? She's uninsured. He said no. Next of kin. Pants right back on fire. He's lying. Do not That's crazy. Todd's

not dad. He's just lying.

Listen, all right, So, you know, we do need you to be in tip top shape going into this week, Todd, Because as everybody knows, we are planning the winter formal. The warming trend in winter formal. It's we say, the winter formal because, as everybody knows, ah, sort of. Ah, secondary sort of offshoot. Yeah. Winter formal is starting to be planned by people who don't believe global warming is real here in town. Really? It's said to be the coldest Winter Board member

Israel. I think we know where the money is coming from going out.

It's said to be the coldest. It's gonna be the coldest formal ever. Ah, and and their pitching it as if it is sort of an event for anybody who knows the truth. It's sort of become this sort of hotbed for conspiracy theorist.

It's a competing for me. Yes, the opposite views

Cold Winter formal so they don't believe in our global warming winter formal. And therefore,

I just think it's kind of like another big change in the air there. They're saying It's like the I say

these people are hacks. I mean, they're hacks and they're losers. It's winter formal, and

you know what the theme should be. Snow

Frank's really original, right? You know,

it's a hacky idea, and I hate that they are making this thing about them instead of about the kids, right and the future.

And of

course I will. I will say this. A lot of people are saying they're not opposing the global, like the global warming's. I think they're just doing a normal winter formal where the theme is snowflakes, but it is very obvious to us that this is a counter programmed event with the formal with our formal to try to draw people away from ours and to indoctrinate them with this bullshit theory that global warming is just It's just sort of the natural sort of state and cycle of of the planet.

Yeah, they're saying its ebbs and flows years. Todd calls them,

uh oh. Uh, Krebs and woes

cabs and well, yeah,

kind of. I actually got a hold of the flyer for this winter formal, normal phone, the normal formal, which is what they're calling it, which is just a slap in our face, which

is another hat rip off has were norm

and I just want I just want

to list a few of the things that are going to be at this formal. And I want you guys to just give me your unfiltered reaction to these things, because, honestly, this makes me sick. So we

also want everyone at home to scream. Yes, please

scream. Bloody murder. Because this is just unbelievable. The first thing on this list photo booth, they're gonna have a photo booth at their at this formal. Okay? I

mean, that's a clear up office of us with guy with shattering lightbulb taking photos on the hot carpet. So, yeah, you gotta step in. Repeat, hot carpet. Guy taking photos like the 19 twenties is gonna have to change Is full of every time

explosion for every photo.

Yeah, that doesn't take any electricity. We don't draw any power

that they don't have any. They're not showcasing any polar bears that are getting skinnier and skinny.

No, In fact, they have actually a sort of, uh, mock up of their design. Looks like it's gonna have, uh, a few different little Blais shires. It's got some sort of falling snow in the sky. There's an ice sculpture that they're gonna have.

Yeah, get rial, huh? X x. You can't make a nice sculpture in 2020. Okay, it's too hot outside on, but once you make an ice sculpture, it's gone. It's melted. You're lying to the kids, and you're setting them up for failure.

That's right. So they've got a nice sculpture. We've got hot water. Uh, we got hot future water,

that's what Sorry. I was I

thought we were gonna have to compete with normal formal. I was a little nervous But as you're telling me all these things, I'm like, Oh, I'm not worry

and doesn't I've heard they've already sold 200 plates. Yes, that's true. 200 plate.

That's true. It's actually a thing in Styrofoam place. Yeah, there

are here yet everything there is ah is disposable unrealized.

Do people not know that they can eat crickets with their hands? That are? Yeah,

yeah, because

that that's a green protein. Crickets have a lot of protein

crickets approach into the future,

and they don't provide farts like cows do. And we all know for funniest fact of all because provide parts of their own.

You're acting like there's a demand their parts provide. Yes,

it's part of the ecosystem

thick with cows. Death provided for a while. It was

good. And it's the funniest fact. They know who they provide

farts for

the U, the world, the global. And it used to be, you know, you wanted a counter fart. Funny, it's what cow chip it's all about you tip him over

the kids, the ground, some of the air. She's not there, asshole.

That's a moving Apu. It's

what was a moon boot. I thought it was just about tipping them over. But it's mostly about the far to the end. Yeah,

although they provide

well, if you're funny, it's biblical. The cow stuff

provide bill. And so and again, it's the funniest fact. Everyone that says it. It's because they know it's hilarious. Cows farts are one of the biggest causes of global warming. It's hilarious.

Yeah, it is true. And I think I think

they call it method because they don't want to say cab far.

It's Kevin and a lot of it. We're gonna have a lot of count fats that are at ours. Yeah, People got to know People need to know.

We will have the impossible burger to We will have will have impossible meat tacos. Well, but it's a v impossible.

No. Is there hides right rip off. It's, um it's beef.

Just be kill us. Way Couldn't find its way over the fucking cold, for we do what we can't do. Everything way. Got the impossible burger. It's beef. Some are I have not found enough

non plastic straws, so there will be a buffer of ah, plastic straw.

Kill us, Drag us. Why don't you

walk up to us at the dance will be standing right in the middle with our grenade. And why

don't you

come up to us and talk to us?

That's right, Sam. What, around the dance with a hot grenade. Live for security? Le

Pen holding the button still? Well, the pain will be behind my ear like a little flower.

What? A little hippie. A grenade? Hippie. And what? Let me guess. Normal formal won't have a live grenade to remind everyone of the impending doom of the future.

No, it actually says it will be a weapons free zone.

Yeah, right there. You're not secure.

Now when I show up,

you're going? Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna go to art. Just

say there's an active threat of the normal.

Lets you stay here for Ty

did shopping this weekend. Hi. Todd and I did some shopping, and we have four costumes and some other equipment. Ready to go, right? This seems dark. If

you know if you see four Thanksgiving turkeys with knives, it's not.

Let's just say the turkeys aren't getting carved it this one. Okay, Turkey's air doing the carving. OK,

so we're going to dress up like turkeys and then stabbed these kids. But the planners

of the normal plan,

which, according to this flyer, is oh, it's

actually a D and B events is live nation.

It's D m B event.

Ah, hey, did it guilty as charged. Dave Matthews has gotta quit planning events. Just keep playing. Here's

what we want. I want to go to a stadium and spend four hours. Listen to you, noodle on the end of ants marching. Yeah, Furious. Don't want you planning high school dances.

Know someday we know what you're doing there Way. No way. You're a pervert. You know, you like high school.

But I'm sure DnB Events is shaking in their boots because,

you know, there's gonna be

some huge buff guy with the violence. He always brings that core some huge guy and a vest with a violin will be there.

So good luck settling that guy

down. He's gonna be, you know, breaking off horse hairs on his violin, right? Nadiya

putting ding ding. Think right now you're here. Yeah. What a

weird what a weird formal. Their

habits. God, it says discussing and actually rather said you love in the special sauce. Come our way

way. Actually, Sarriegi levels because, Well, I will I will say our biggest. The biggest event of the night will be milk and cereal cereal in. We will have that.

But full disclosure, as was just mentioned, G love actually had to cancel, but the sauce will be there.

And let's just say it's no Couldn't get this exercise. We got 1000. Yes, everybody does she love in the special sauce is the special sauce is 1000

island. So g it she left by himself covered in 1000 island. Um,

yes. So we couldn't get that we could not get that. So we have a bottle of 1000.

Um oh, man, you know, So it really does. It fucking pisses us off doing this, but our event is going to stand on its own. Ah, and people are gonna come. We haven't pre sold tickets because we're not pussy's

way. We're not scared that no one's coming. We

know people are gonna come because ours is exciting and cool

and weigh like it, so

people will definitely be there.

I mean, speaking of fear, if your weather 200 people that already bought a ticket to normal formal and you just heard there's likely gonna be a turkey stabbing. You go ahead and refund that ticket and come to our form.

Yes, it's only twice the price and it's twice as long

and twice by that. We mean four times for both of those who we apologize.

And it's nowhere near the beach that you want to go to afterwards.

Oh, yeah. Uh, this just in. We are holding hot, formal far from the beach to signify the raising. Sea water is not getting there is yet.

That's right. That's right. We're signifying how far inland we're all gonna have to move moving the formal in.

I bet you do want to go down to the beach and finger each other

by just so you know it's not gonna be there in 20 years. So where you're going to get fingered now

by the cactuses will be having the after pro after formal at the cactus rain.

That's right. We're planning the after formal, uh, to a teacher sponsored after for

normal at the cactuses, and we'd right, Listen, we don't want you to drink, but if you're going to do it, we'd rather have you do it with us. Dr. Yeah. Strike with us in Dr Hall? Yes. We wanna watch all the drinking and we'll give you keys right back. As soon as you finish. Your drink is

long as you beg for your keys. You can have about Aziz long as you go. Come

on. I'm fine.

Ever in the bag. Has to have a compliment to whoever you have to come. You

have to compliment us. One compliment and you get you here. I'll say for May.

It's one compliment. Three bags and then a quick eat a slice of pizza to soak it up. Yes, if I see you finish that slice of pizza. All right. You serve

pizza. It's covered in grease.

You should be good to go and just promises You'll take the back roads provinces, But immediately get on the free or or take the freeway. Either one is actually really good idea which everyone is

way faster If you're drunk, you want

todo Well, there's no cops. The cops can't catch it.

That's right. Um yeah, well, you know, you heard it. Here come Dar's don't go to their

video here,

but anyway, we're gonna take a quick little break when we come back, we're gonna have a real special guests in the lounge. Stick around. Alright, guys. Thank you so much for sticking it out through that break there. I know that's always tough, but thank

you. Long and arduous. Yeah,

but we're really excited. Say it every time when we come back from break that we're really excited. But it's true today because we've got a great guest. She's your ah, your chorus teacher. You know where you lover Miss Carol Grodsky. How you doing? Mr Wright's

Me, Me, Me, me, me. You have to

excuse me. My voice is a little bit horse. No, it's a beautiful. I've

been writing the songs for the musical numbers of the Jewish play and, uh oh, I'm just some rock

numbers in there. And so my voice is a little bit of horseshit.

There's some rock and roll members.

It's Ah, it's a

rock cycle. A lot of people say it's out of your range. Maybe bring somebody else and don't strain your voice. You see mill, Your voice is a little strange. Are you taking

a K bill? Well, who's the choir teacher here? I'll tell you what's Adam okay? all right, I'll tell you what's in my range, and I'll tell

you what's out of my range. Really. It's just overuse, okay? You know, I've been putting in 24 26 hours that they working on this rock cycle because originally, it was a Jessica Will. Yeah, it

was. It was a jazz sickle. And just through talking and a little bit learned a little

bit about Carroll's history, she toured with Janis Joplin on I

thought, Well, let's bring that rock and roll in.

Ah, yeah, right. They would let you

loose Teoh to kind of distract the crowds and have the crowds follow you instead of Janice after a show. Yeah, you're kind of a decoy.

That's right. If they're a little too hot on on a job so they would have me take my tits out on the field

So it wasn't like, Oh, that's Janis Joplin doing that. It was just

I would buy it and kind of like, Just run after you push you down, they would rip the mask off of you and go.

It's not her. But you were pretty jostled up. Yeah, I was where Janis

jostled I was fully just That's right. And, uh, yeah, we're a dog mask. You seen 101 Dalmatians? Yes. Spotted dog mask. And I'd be like,

Hey, it's May. You know the concert. He just saw its may. I was here, And

people are just going in the dog. Master

dog. You know, people like jobs. They're like

dogs. I'm gonna tell you this. It was a shock to us when we found out that Todd was actually willing to collaborate with someone on a play because it's unusual for us to see tied. Sort of give up. Any

creative famously cannot work with other people.

I haven't collapsed. I haven't had a good collaboration since marriage. It's been tough for May

and even that one. Pretty questionable. Not very good.

Yeah, he's been burned for sure. Quite a bit of convincing.

When your

vows, you said it's my way or the highway, right? That's

right. Uh, well, I did. Durst vows. Um uh, Fred me, Fred Dirt. I did double Durst duty in my house. So

did you Are you burn A lot

Went into the other room, but I went to the other room. Murder? Yeah, I went mutant dressed as a woman for the first dance, you know, and just like both thirsts, Uh,

it's almost your exact frequents.

Carol and I work on the same frequency, and it's like a Bob Fosse for 32.

That's an actual frequency.

Yeah, the frequency of the years.

That's right. We're on Earth frequency here, and she's taught me a lot about some metaphysical bullshit the night it

needs to be into. But

now she's really put me in touch with the frequency of the earth. You know, we've been we've been kind of having conversations late, late into the morning. We're

having a good time way

really are. We really are. And, uh, she pushes me as much as I pushed her. So I said, She said, I've been working 24 hours deaths that can we go 26

and it doesn't make

any sense to me and for Todd. I put in those extra tears in my day.

That's right. That's right. She obviously is putting in you said two towers. What did you say?

Extra thio? Thio was having a lot of trouble dressed. If I 10 I put in a 10 Todd,

not really. We see each other. He sees me. Us in art.

Recognize art is what I would say, right? And Carol Carol did something that I really appreciate is that you were trying to train the students to sing, and it wasn't working. They just worry on your frequency. So what did you dio?

I said, you

gotta listen up, everybody

and I corralled. Um, and I brought him in to see Todd. And I said, Todd is gonna bring a fresh perspective, one that I can't bring on how to sing, and he's gonna visualize through me. What? I'm not visualizing for these kids.

So Todd source taught them to sing through an interpretive sort of dance.

I didn't interpretive dance because Carol really access my delusions of grandeur. Said I can't do something. Todd will be able to fix it. And I said, that sounds like me. And you brought all this crowd students in and I did a little bit of a dance, which was how long would you say I was? So in it

it was like 40.

That wasn't that long. And a lot

of it was you panting. I just got so lost in it. It's been 45 years.

And what? It wasn't even a minute. How could you get lost? The moment was almost just one moment.

That and that's the thing. When you're working on such a deep level, you go somewhere else. It's like you ever have You ever fainted and passed out on lost consciousness? Yeah, yeah, yeah, me too. Me too. So people say you were just out for 10 seconds and say it felt like inception it for, like, 10 years.

Well, I'm excited to hear some of these. What you calling him Rock Sickles?

Rock sickle Is is what we're going

for. A stroll Tunes, rock cycle tracks. Actually, the lyrics to one of the songs is ah, directly derived from the Durst. Uh, vow. Yeah, Yeah, I said it at your wedding.

That's right. I We I thought it would be nice to put some of my vows in my

I don't know. I heard I heard that one song just called Iraqi. It's so neat you're dropping directly and devout. And now it's a song and it's for a Jewish play. Well, directly we all know druggies, Jewish dancy. I

must be I I think durst might be. His brother looks like Jon Lovett, so that's foolish enough to May. And so you know it's got some. But Carol said to me, she broke down my lyrics. I wrote, I wrote the book and you wrote I wrote the lyrics and you wrote the book. What is that? And you saw my lyrics. He said, There's no heart in these meaning. Isn't the book the script? I don't know which is

the whole requires Later teachers just I'm just I think

the book is the actual script and

the words go your basketball, Carol. Fuck, yeah. Okay. I think this is honestly taught. I've never

seen you feel so warm

towards a person. I'm lit up for this relationship.

Let's do our handshake.

All right. Rare e normal Normal. Normal

way. She couldn't have squeezed you. That was like to limp. And she's got a fluttering Neary. Why did you call that? Our leadership? There's nothing specific to it. Wasn't like a slab by five. Nothing was going

to be like, you know, you know all the n b A. Guys have a very special

or even just like sort of slap fist bump explosion like something like that.

Look, if you first brought me, there will be an explosion That will be all the bones in my hand. Okay.

That's why I know as your best friend to not pounds you

like that. And I

agree we are best friends. Wow. That Carol, You been at the school for how long now?

Oh, God.

Oh,

that takes me back. I'd say maybe 56 years. That's

right. You really went somewhere, Very. With

not as long as one of the kids.

That's right. Yeah.

Before you required Teacher. Obviously you did. Ah, dog Mass. Joplin in the sixties. But you have a lot of singing and teaching experience. Ah, and I'm honored to be in the presence of someone like you. You toured with a lot of a lot of grades. You were a vocal teacher for a lot of the greats. What was that like going from on the road to being at a school?

Well, we're teacher, and when you're touring, you know, it's two different animals, but everybody is great, you know. It's like you're teaching the musicians famous musicians, their stars. They're great, but also was beautiful about thes kids. Is They got the passion of every every superstar Eesti up there on the stage and there are also great. So what? What I gonna learn is that everybody's great.

Wow. Well, what a message. There

are other musicians that you consulted along the way. I know you recently sort of more recently, you consulted? Are you helped Fergie sing the national anthem? I'm not a big national anthem can I saw basketball went viral for it being not that good. Not day in Seoul to you, but like Oh,

you should have heard

Fergie before Miss Kratz. You got ahold of her.

Teach, very for my tower is part of me. Did

you teach Fergie all those unnecessary flourishes?

Uh, miss history? I'm not sure about that. But flourishes. Yes, Um,

every study

music like I have you you'll come to see the flourishes is what makes music listenable. You know, if you listen to a song that's like I that's a doubt like a child Music is all flourishes. That's what makes a song. No.

And you also if I'm currently if I'm wrong. But I did do a little bit of research. But you also did consult with Roseanne when she sang the national anthem at that baseball game.

Yeah, I'm I'm a big national anthem consultant. That's one of my main gigs yet.

And it feels like the national anthem. There's not so many ways to do it. The words kind of say the same, but you keep finding a new one.

Yeah, the reason

why the greats come to me for national anthems because I give a spin teach person, I let them find their own spin on and bankers and I take

it That's fun. Uh, you has No. I like to sing a little bit in my free time. I don't get a chance to do it publicly every now and then. But I also do fancy myself a bit of a national anthem fan.

Yeah, I saw you. You signed up to audition for the Jewish play rock

cycle. I did, because I'm trying to prove to Todd that I'm not anti Semitic. Uh,

the audition didn't help. Okay, waiting with pretty well.

I mean, I saw you

getting into character all week. Uh, I

was walking by right before you went into your audition. You said, Look, I look just like one of them.

Yeah, You try to cut off my foreskin is a preparation for the You try you sniffing at my dick on the way other

Jewish people besides Moyle.

That's not true. That's not what I was specifically auditioning for. The Moyle part. I didn't want to go in there looking like You know something?

Oh, no, I think you think they're only boil.

No, I know that. There's other things. There's rabbis. There's Baker

Bay Astronomy. Cool thing is Mailer war fiddlers. There's good, of course. Fiddlers. You were fiddling around. I have You were fiddling around on my back in the basement? Yeah, I think you got too

hard on the boil, Fiddler. And you played a Jewish devil Went down to Georgia. Honestly, I think offended everyone.

Everybody that couldn't with double came out, came up propel

and said he would sell it. He would sell you his soul to never play that song.

Okay, there was a real reverse Garth Brooks. Well, I was gonna ask

for some. Devil went down through draw draw. He was looking for a sold through

steel. I thought

that's how the song went. But anyway, never mind. I was gonna ask for some tips on singing, but I think

I think the question still stands probably the solution for you. I shouldn't. Your solution with you The answer for you is, uh maybe just do is yourself and not in a character of someone of a different race color creed. But as's faras, any normal singer, what would you say? Carol is a good piece of advice for So we're working on their singing charms.

All right, well, the first thing I tell everyone is Teoh find like, a little kind of dippy thing to do at the end of your note.

So flourish again.

You know a lot about flourishes. So what I like to do at the end of my son What? That at the end of my on notice go. How is that A little A

to end of your nose?

Yes, for example of out did the national anthem. I do something like Oh, say, can you

see? I like that. That's nice. Five don zehr How your minutes

words You do change your last available to

you find it You know your fire And if it's coming really

go in the middle of Ah I've seen you put him in the middle of lyrics in the national anthem.

That's right. It can come in the middle. But you gotta hit your teas in your days and eso if it does come in the middle of light, for example, I didn't get to finish. It would go Ed dons early, lout. In other words, over. Yeah, that's right. Hit addiction.

What? So brow

Loud day we

Hey, wait. Because when you're seeing especially for stage, you gotta nuncio, have trust for staying. You got two big makeup, rosy cheeks white out the face, Big states Baker. That's right. You like to

be able from far away, and they had to be able to hear far ways, right? Just for men

up there. Not that I need it. But if you did, have you did which you don't, Which I don't Thank you. You don't adult, Thank you very much. Carol, I I got to say

I was just listening to that version. If I just had my eyes closed, they would kind of sound like, ah, woman who lived above me was trying to remember the lyrics. National anthem all stepping on her cats. Uh, are like stepping on attack every few seconds, which I like. I like that kind of flourish. I don't know if that's what you're going for.

That feels right. That is like, Yeah,

and your voice Is it always been this way, or do you smoke too many cigarettes? Because conversationally, it's not a singers voice, necessarily.

Not conversationally, no. But as I mentioned at the top, you know, I've been working night and day 26 hours a day and on this musical.

Okay, You need some water up to

to my hey as your hurts. Sorry about that. Was that your tooth? It was one of them. Yeah, OK, Yeah. I usually keep

a couple spares in my

kind of lady. This is great news.

Yeah, but, you know, usually I think my voice,

but would be described as something of ah, smooth talker. Something you guys ever heard. Like Jessica Rabbit near She talks. That's how ye easily sound

Pretty sultry. I've heard this

song three and smooth and boys, Now you see me around the school when I haven't been working night and day talking.

Just grab it. Dressing like er

yeah, I taste just like a little lot tag of damn real

smooth. That's how my boys usually tastes. Your voice is like a little boy. You're you're one of

the only people I have ever heard. Compare your voice to a taste.

Yeah, well, you haven't really been experiencing the professional music

world as much as I have heard.

No, that is true. And I don't have any experience

when you're a professional, is you? All the sort of mediums and creativity sort of blend together, right, cause you'll say, take a sniff of this because, well,

exactly. You know, I enter the world of being a perfume, Mr of Chef. Are, you know, or a painter? You know, when here in the world of music it they kind of embraces all of the arts.

I thought that was an interesting thing. We did when we share working on the play with you and the musical is we haven't even gotten to the scene yet. Day one went through full cooking course. Day two was a sniffing class. Eso You're kind of giving us experience of all the senses before you ever even do voice.

That means that's why you have to invoke every single

sense now. You made the, uh, the dial tone noise earlier. Pretty, pretty good. You consulted on that noise right back over Said it is early on. You brought your old bell company. Is it true that you also consulted on random noises in the first Diallo modem?

It's right. Yeah, that was actually I collaborated with some people, but let's see if you recognize this.

Oh, well, yeah.

Perfect. You guys, computers, mouth, toe are years. That's right. A little bit different when you get there. Computer like that. You know the time.

It sounds like you also consulted in the moving of a metal file cabinet on a concrete floor. Very heavy cabinet. You noticed that you consulted on that sound. That

was That's right. Um, I don't know. Have you ever heard of sound effects? Yeah. Yeah, Foley.

Exactly. Wasn't sure if you boys would do with that

man. Oh, yeah. We lived in Hollywood for a while,

Right? Right. Sure. East teach

Hollywood high. That right, Todd?

That's right. Yeah, that's right. I always try to find the high school that's nearest to the dirtiest Jack in the box. I'll see if there are

but you don't work a jack

in the box. Never have never will. Okay, time is that I have a shift for something going pants. Uh, but yeah, I used to teach a Hollywood high, but you did fully You what? You did some polling high. Wouldn't you? Were a teacher. Hollywood high, right?

That's right. I mean, that's con aware. Got discovered for my

fully skills. Was doing the sound effects for the high school place. Wow,

you live sound effect.

I did live sound effect because the students, they didn't really know what they're doing in terms of science. Yeah, So I did all the signs, like for Dracula? Did the bats on

They could? No, no additional. Additional. Yeah,

I dreaded the brothers. Other noises from a place that I might know that you would have done, I guess. The drinking of the poison And Romeo and Julia.

Yeah. Yeah, that was me.

Eyes. You dipped into his moan as well. That's

right. Well, actually, our late actor he lost his voice completely during our final three shows. So I don't

You don't go

from behind stage. He mouth the whole thing. And I did his lines for

the whole Romeo. Juliet.

It's right. Check this out. Oh, we're that all. I think not on my father. And these great tears grace his. Remember? It's more than those I shed for him. What was he lack? I have forgot him. My imagination care is no favor. And but Juliette's, um,

undone your crying. There is no living. None. Todd's Melanie If

Juliet Be Away, doesn't it? We're all one that I

should love. One bright particular star, Todd, is nodding in agreement but has no idea what's happening

and think toe wet it. She is so above me. It was pretty, though, a plague to see in its brightness a ladder or a lot. That's that's

pretty much on U

Dub. That whole thing over that is amazing.

Tied. You did not know why.

Yeah, the whole thing

you don't the whole thing play well, no time,

even read the lines. I just had the whole thing. And

that was really And of course, that we both know what scene that is. That is Ah, good sneeze bythe.

That's just another one of my skills. Sneezing E.

I was in stereo for May.

Yeah, well, I could throw my voice. Wow.

Yeah, Just one of my many skills.

Well, it's important that nobody is more skilled than anyone else that's directing the big musical. You know, I think we're equally skilled, which is nice.

I recited a passage for many Shakespeare Play out from memory.

Oh, absolutely, absolutely. Name a Shakespeare Play The Tempest Another one,

uh, taming of the Shrew No. A Midsummer Night's dream

Try, think again. Bad Keep going, fellow. No, don't know.

Romeo and Juliet.

Modern Romeo and

Julie. Okay, there we go. Take now on Romeo and Juliet. Thank you.

So, you know, a passage

from Modern does is improv show, By the way, it's a lot of suggestions until he wants to do something. No, no,

but no one wants to hear me do that. You say that was here that No, no. I mean, you know what's here? We do modern romance, Juliet. So

it's so fascinating. So you guys were doing the Jewish play together? Are you guys, uh, sharing equal credit? Like you guys co writing, co directing, co starring?

We've

talked about it. It's pretty

heated. Discussions about it got heated fast on one. And

that's just

contract that I'm seeing on the table in front of you. Todd.

Oh, um, it's It's a standard co directing contract.

It's as prenuptial agreement across that written an ugly pen is, uh, playthings.

Wait, Play an ugly pins ugly past.

Well, you know, I figured since the pre nup fucked me so hard, it must be a good contract for somebody. So I could kind of rework it for our deal. And I was thinking, I mean, I don't know if you want discussed this on Mike or off because we got into such a fight over before.

I mean, I feel like

I could be cool about it now. You know, we already had the heat.

Great, because it's just there's some issues with the deejay about co directors, so I think it just makes the most sense if I'm the director,

right? You know, I have put in a lot of input Directorial li like, you know, I feel like I should get some sort of credit, but I'm I'm happy taken like associate producers. I'm like,

26 hour days

toe for six hours.

Well, I'm inspiration. I send a lot of emails checking in and following up, I would say right. Uh,

right. I mean, we talked about it, you know, I'm getting the credit for Ah, you know the book, right? I mean, am I

just talk about that? Yeah, go ahead. It

says here that if it bombs, she did

it.

That's right. And that is straight from my pre nup and vows, actually, in my wedding monologue. Uh, but yeah, that bombs. Obviously you'll take

I just don't want

to contribute to some of the erasure of male directors. That's happening right now.

I feel like that's happening a lot in Hollywood trying Teoh take you all down. But I don't

want to be a part of that

system either. No

way,

Miss Grantski. I appreciate that. But I want to make sure you feel heard. And I do know that the students have been kind of listening to you more and taking your notes more so I'm sure that is enough.

Credit is. And you know what

I

feel like? I don't really know what I'm doing anyway. I mean, I kind of need Todd there. He's kind of mentoring me, you know? So, you know, I don't really mind. I

don't get credit. It's

kind of like

a faucet virgin thing where I'm sure in 40 years they'll make a show about you.

I think so.

That will be nice. And maybe they'll touch on my womanizing a little bit. But I'll also look like a G.

But I don't even see. It is like womanizing, you know? I see it like we're kind of

like we have a like, a little thing going, you know, it's it's firing its passionate and

that's Are you two dating to artists? Fast

of what would you call it?

We're working together. Yeah, things happen. You know, when two people work so closely and you know, I don't want to get too sticky. So I'm not going to try to

Good luck with Todd. Sticky person. Somehow he always feels like he wiped honey off fresh

out of the shower. Todd is 60

I believe. May I know what it's like.

Oh, my God. I'm disgusted.

So I don't know. I think this could be really nice. Is you guys keep it

professional, though, Todd, you know, like, take yourself out it be respectful.

Way have been pretty respectful. Will break up if you ever don't like my notes or anything like that, But we'll end up getting it out afterwards.

Yeah, and if you do break up with

me cause I don't like your notes, I'm going to keep fine

for you. No matter how much you disrespect me, treat me poorly and make me feel like I'm fucking piece of garbage.

Which you're not, You're not. And I'm here to show you that

That's a sign of a good artist. You never quit. You never quit,

you know, And it's about the R. And whenever I say that I love Todd, what I'm really saying is

like, I'm passion about our rock cycle. That's

right. There's a lot of passion to the rocks going. I think it's showing in the songs. I don't know if because it would be crazy to do a song right now. I am almost regretting suggesting it.

I would love to

hear one. Yeah. I mean, what? I don't want to

put you on the spot, Carol, since it's mostly you. And then

I heard I heard the guitar parts, so I can I can pretend to be. They could

tell you could do you some some So we're gonna do the Iraqi that I'm not gonna

track. Actually day.

Um, I mean, I think the closing number is pretty good. Uh, plenty of oil. Plenty of oil. Yeah, it's kind of saying that the no pun intended that the story of Monica was actually gas sliding and they had enough oil the whole time.

I love that piece. Shall we do

it? I feel like

I heard the drumbeat before, so I could probably maybe a little something. It'll be very simple,

and I can do wild triangles. All

right, Donna, Then I'm way oil. Last long way. Wait. Some crackers. Cold way. Wayne Andre. Holes so much A lot way. I had more oil than with

educating people on how hard it was. A

lie. Hurtful. It seems hard for to the heritage. Well, I like that they're owning it, saying we that to me, it's ownership like

we always talk about, take responsibility, be proud of what you did and just own it and move forward.

Yeah, that's right. And that's kind of what we're saying. And I think like I'm Jewish. Mrs. Grodsky, you are

I I think my

23 may had, like, a 1% or something like that.

Great. Um and you know, 1% in 23. And me, as the Torah says, is enough to make you do it. So I think that we could speak for our people in that way. Way just kind of sell them out. Almost.

I feel like if you if you do have Howard in it, you're gonna You've reached a tipping point.

Song is pretty offensive. I feel like you have if you do cast in which I know I know. Still haven't found

the part. We're still You're still well, boil

working progress for sure it's a work in progress. I that song Oil, oil, oil,

oil six. The song. It's kind of like the candy man can in Willy Wonka, but its oil Moyle kind of introducing.

I keep looking, but you always do have Howard. We

do have our to be the circumcision guy that they buy oil from.

He's in our top three picks

is in our top three d there, Howard, Carol or myself. So we're trying to figure out

Wow, I can't wait for the play. I can't wait for the for the winter formal. The good one.

Yeah. And honestly, Carol, it was such

a pleasure to have you in the past, so

thank you so much.

Next time I'm on my voice sounds a little bit

smoother. It's beautiful, even like this

year. Are you going to, Ah, winter formals. Anyone? Um well,

nobody's asked.

I mean, it's stupid, but it's gonna be pretty. Tom.

Todd, What's

this poster board

to it? It's gonna be done. But maybe is friends, like, just his friends or whatever. It's like we could even wear stupid close to show that we don't care about.

How are you? Oh,

my God. Thank you. Yeah.

This is a drawing of, uh, you and me taking a photo together.

I you made that. You drew that? Yeah. Okay. Just looks like a cartoon are like a kindergartener. His crayon drawing. I wouldn't even get put

all really with a kindergarten. Took nine hours. Todo so obviously.

Um yes.

Wow. Coupled with you weren't friends. Just friends, you know, know know that time is gonna come down. God is holding his chest. 00 no. He's your okay with every friends with France Outlined. Francis. Hot

man. We gotta deal with Todd's flaming pants right now, but we really appreciate you being in a lounge. Caroline, Uh, we know. I hope you guys have fun at the winter formal. It's gonna be interesting to see how that goes, but we really appreciate you being on the show today.

Thank you so much for having me and come on out to the rock

cycle. Yeah, absolutely. And

maybe I Look, do you want to get a pick? You up, or did you want to meet there?

Maybe. Let's just meet

stiff, stiff body straight. Fall back on his back. Ouch. Landed right on a crack. Uh oh. Step by step. Oh, no, it's not. Todd. Padre can afford that way.