dig it. I got my

coffee. I didn't even poured my coffee. I guess I'll do an episode without coffee. Um uh, wait. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of the Teacher's Lounge. The first, best and only podcast pertained issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community. I, of course am Howard, not my draws. Levis, your biology teacher. Uh, here are my buddies.

It was because, uh, you drew something pretty affection offensive and Pictionary. And then you tried to take it back.

I'll tell you right now, it was a

someone, your whole notebook. Know what? Not my draws. Who found that someone found your whole Pictionary notebook? How you're in trouble.

Well, everybody, when you play Pictionary, you bring your own pad and you put all your drawings and one because then at the end of it, you have sort of ah ah, collection of all your work. And you can you could maybe put it in a gallery or some like that. So I do have a notebook that I always use for Pictionary. Somebody found that? Yeah, denying. And I'll do it again. That's not mine. That is in mind.

Those going ago That's from our side gallery.

Yeah. Oh, fart side.

Okay, Yeah. I have issues of drawing people with proper proportions. Okay. Yeah, I put little heads to approach. Yeah.

So you are

trying it on them, rapper, but yes, yes, I'm trying

trying hard, and it's coming out like Gary Larson's farsighted. Here's the

thing. I know how to draw circles and rectangles. Those are the two shapes that I make. I can draw anything that is made up of those two shapes. Okay? And that's the That's just the way that I do things. And it's a bummer that you guys air put me on blast Well, on the podcast waken You can answer this after we finish up with your Pictionary notebook. But this was also your defense after there was a man found murdered with some underwear near him. Yeah, Neary's were These were not. Your draw

wears had your fingerprints all over

right. But while in my underwear would Mike draws as they say, Be so close to this committee. I

wasn't arrest. I was way. If

you're listening to go and play this back, Bill did not speak for the 1st 3 minutes, and then decided to change the thing that draws meant. But unfortunately he was doing for those three minutes later German,

I was thinking, Remember Sam, Weatherman, recent soy

boy. That's right. The soy farm is thriving. Nothing but say tan today breakfast, lunch and dinner Say tan fake chicken.

So no se tan tan, Uh,

not to be confused with the yells of up yells or what I say when somebody taking my picture say,

10. You always say tan with cheese because I don't like

cheese. I'm lactose intolerant. So

you like a big open mouth smile Because

even saying cheese, I'm so lactose intolerant. If

you're listening at home right now, take a picture of yourself a selfie or a mirror pick

saying tasing. Best say tan

plays actually choose not to send a Satan photos.

Well, send us your Satan

photo. Send us your say tan photos of you cooking meatless chicken, whatever. They intend us. You saying tan?

Yeah, three little video clip,

because I'm a soy boy.

We need two out of three for the soy boy. Just any two of the three se tan option.

Yeah, because of this soy boy thing. Really taking off I do have a calendar coming out this year. The 12 months of soy boys. That's right. If you'd like to be in that calendar again, submit your Ah, you're safe,

Tan. You say you have to be a vegetarian or

you have to look like a vegetarian. Okay, So thin. I don't have you. While I don't know whatever vegetarian looks like, we're gonna be

decided. Really? Making a weird face at me.

Well, a solitary and really

Okay, Yeah. Asking if there's anything else on the menu.

That's right. You have to be returning something on and saying that this has product in an animal, Of course. Animal. So, uh, yeah, soy boys really left to return and make difficulty.

Uh, what the counter is, it's people you pictures of you doing those things. 12

months of soy boys so you can be submitting right now. There is 12 placeholders of me, of course, working in the field.

You love to get 11 other

squeezing into a coffee. I would love to get 12 others. I don't want to be,

you know, want to be in I

know what I'm hideous. You don't wanna be in this thing But if nothing, if there's no other options, it's gonna be

me. Have you opened the submissions up for the students?

Not yet. No, this is the big announcement.

OK? Oh, wow. Your first guys says you can. You yourself can be a soy boy.

Oh, yeah. Wow. Yeah. And if you eat

enough soy or participate in the soy lifestyle Enough, you're a soy boy. Even if you're a girl.

Okay. So sorry, boys. Could be girls. Absolutely. Okay, You don't call

them soy girls. He's still a soy boy. That a boy? Well, yeah, it doesn't roll off eso a girl sounds bad. Yeah, not funny. No soar, boys. A lifestyle more than anything. I mean, you could be in a URL girl, which is a girl who drinks Earl Grey Tea sand, soy sand. So I because if

you put soy into a gray years, you're a soy boy. Also look up from an ex comedy special. You might be a soy boy. No Oiler. I hear it, leader.

Pretty self deprecating. So if you prefer food

out of a pod, you might be a soy

boy. Bills hurt zone lack. That's eyes One of my favorite eso

No more spoilers. No more spoilers. But there's a whole bunch more. It'll be a 15 special

coming up. You okay? Are our If you would also see what we've seen utterly cut. And this one,

Honestly, I think you should cut it out because it's sort of it's a different thing. But he states, if you

will use with

yeah, yeah, you are referring to yourself in Spanish. You might be a soy boy.

That's right. That's right. That one is wrong, but it's still funny. Is

it wrong? What's out

about the right soy? Oh, that That was not the right one. Howard fucked that up. That one is a I think

you should broaden out the game. You're special because I

think I

might be too hard.

Oh, it's too hard

to come up with. I think it's

too. It's just it be to repay

it. Yeah, that's the most

important part of the joke right there, By the way,

you can figure it out after they say, If you delete it, it s so if you are a product is mostly subsidized by the US government,

you might be a soy

born after the product if

your product That's right. Well, don't waste the whole special. Now they've got to pay for Howard. Do one rial went

do one rial. One. Okay. Hit the If you

if you,

uh, get, uh, get beat up by, uh, people who, like, uh,

Karas. Um, you might be a soy boy. Wait. That was the closer That way, with all the arms and boiler lets you know it's natural. He company verbatim from on your if

you were

obviously out 20 minutes before the you

were out of

it is a lot of having a high, you

know? Well, the rift

is what it is. What makes you know that it's fresh, right? Right. You know

who else is here? Bill? Crave ease here. Um, I am coaching the basketball

team. Things were going good. Um, what What else is happening

with you? Yeah. You're running for your running for the coach. Is that what it is?

That why you're running for basketball, coach? Assistant coach Sulamani? That's right. I assassinated assisted Kinsella. Money had to be dealt with. You're on the verge of pulling me into the race for basketball coach, even though I've never had any experience do well. You're a billionaire, and you care, and you can afford you've been blanketing the town with ads

was German. If you want to know what's gonna happen in our next four episodes, go back a few seasons. Listen to the lunatic in the White House season. We're doing the same thing with different specific thing, but it's basketball instead of White House. Yes, you know where we're going, but we're doing it anyway. The

slobs will

be happy that they can take their foot off the gas lies on. We are doing a story line again, but with slightly new size needed. Needed to know that.

Yeah, and it feels slightly heightened because we ourselves are

possibly at war. Thes the source material feels more heightened. And

where your two later and things air year to Worse?

Yes, exactly. So of course, Howard has been blanketing the town with ads that he pays for with his family's money. And And I have a question for you, Howard. Do you think it

should just be because you have money? You get to run for basketball? Coach eyes, that privilege. I mean, you could say that it's privilege that I was able to jump into the race. But that doesn't mean that my ideas should be disqualified.

But do you have never had a basketball bought for you by

a private interest? No, not once. Building. Nobody's ever gifted me a basketball. Not ever.

What? You're fucking basketball rack Looks like. Held those balls air. Beat the fuck up. I got the nicest balls. And yes, I'm gonna give rolling a kickback. If I get coach again, I'm gonna be like, Yes, you can supply the team. We will need balls. Me? I don't understand. What? My balls.

Air grassroots. My brat. My, I've found everything. Every every dollar I've ever made.

You don't have those beautiful Rawlings basket.

And by the way, I think it's interesting that Wilson refuses to endorse you.

Very interesting. You had to get a baseball brand to make your basketballs.

Yeah, So what? Listen, I have actual Gatorade. You have salt water. You just give people sailing

salute with natural flavoring. You squeeze a lemon in there,

you pay. It is I've tasted it. I don't know if you

noticed I've infiltrated your campaign. I am. Of course I've noticed. You did not notice that was May. I took pictures

of you, Bill.

There's times of black and white photos

of you breaking into my campaign offices,

you

long lens coaching, coaching me todo you from the top of the grocery store. But don't be the photos right here. Play me the sound, Jeanne. That's going about their normal day. Long limbs could change change in black and white.

Oh, you got me. You didn't Even you got me at my daughter's recital.

Had no idea when you were going to break the law Bill. I followed you for a full week.

Just because I sat next to

big paper. Who supplies the thing? We were ripped through the beginning of the game. Literally. Big paper. Yeah, the lined paper.

How did you know? Why, Bishop, how did you not get suspicious of all these photos in these? Someone is always doing something to notify. They're putting a flower in your pocket. Putting a big hat on your head, saying they're marking is who to take the photo of. It's It's an obvious photo center.

So wait every time you don't even tell the the photographer who I am your like I'm gonna put a big hat on here. Is

that why I got that all

some big, huge hat? I send somebody else to pay a street

game with you every single time I need to take a picture. So when you're doing three card Monte, that's when the guy puts his head on your hat. That's because he's showing a photographer that it's you.

Oh, so I was wondering why

I keep getting these big, huge jackets that mark me clearly. Well, it's long lens coaching Gucci. You thought

it You thought it was crazy that somebody walked up to you with a jacket that said, This is the guy

Bill Gravy on the back. I thought it was like

a new G Q thing. You know, like the style Was that Go? It's not. It's me, Bill, and I'll tell you this. I think this is a much more intriguing story that Mueller to thicken the lighthouse.

It's got better legs, really. I think it's got better legs and lose, but slobs feel free to compare and contrast. Let's get side by sides of the story lines and see where they break up on where they are similar.

Well, this is very dramatic. This is I mean, it's the new Watergate, for sure. With these coaching Guccis of use

catching a long lead. You guys,

Now you know exactly what I'm talking about. You a little bit more. Someone takes

a picture and it sounds like someone enters an old business.

Yeah, Or open the cash register.

Yeah, I think. Yeah, way Don't even talk about this anymore. Now let's happen for you this week. Todd

Todd, Padre Theater teacher, director, writer, feminist Ah, Big week for May, Obviously. Well, it's been a tough month. I got snubbed at the Oscars, Um, snubbed with SAG awards. Um, I swept the Razzies yet again. Um,

every category, every category. When you also where pain

was the janitor threats as I swept there. As is, Let's not forget, I'll tell you, there's nothing more humiliating sweeping your own. Fill your awards seeing your own films up on the screen as people are booing and Thrones.

Well, there were people there to heckle you about your sleeping as well. You got the Razzie for sleep.

I got the reservoir sweeping, created the award during

or the Janney. What do they call it?

You know you awarded. He got the Janney.

I got the Janet. Well, I got a lifetime achievement award. Our lifetime Nana treatment award. Wow. Dirtiest mop bucket hurt his mop bucket. Uh uh.

And I say it's interesting, though. Todd, you can dispute this that I know you're going to, but they can't say that they included previous work at Burger

King and correct on the dirty is my bucket's correct big you. How

did you go? It just how did

you win? Both dirtiest mop bucket and least square footage mopped in career

I use on Leetmaa. You mopped what was smaller than the head of the mob, which means you, which is, like, different on top of the senior

saying had the bucket gets so dirty if I'm not being such a small amount of space,

exactly what I'm asking type

and we know the answer is you wash your hair.

You had a clean bucket. Well,

I've seen you

washing your hair, dipping upside down, doing a headstand, sticking your head in that squeeze. Just squeeze in your head and to clean it out.

Yeah, it's a quick dry. If you need to watch your hair and I have time to blow dry and all that stuff. Just thing is when he what? When

he when he puts the big caution went head, um, sign on top of his

head yet somehow bythe piece of that. But, you

know, you put up the signs on I want This is a public service announcement for everybody. It does not make you free from litigation on old lady. Slipped on my head and broke her hip. And now I'm in court.

I start counter suing her for jumping on your right. Yeah, I've got

to share with it for a head jumping, so it's gonna be a lot

of thistles.

Might be a too close to call here. They're calling this a too close to call because she definitely did ahead jump. Well, there, actually

the judges bringing in a ref. Yes, it's the church isn't sure how to litigate, so they're looking to call it.

Well, I heard that Tide

is going to try to stick his neck out at the very end to win

photo, finish ge long lens, but finish of the court and I don't you know we're talking about I don't know. I don't either. But you swept the

Razzies. You what? You swept the Janney's or you lost everything in the Jenny.

I got the lifetime dis Achievement award on Achievement Award of the Chinese, then lost everything else last night. Lost cleanest floor lost, least upsetting for Children to be around. You won that loose upsetting for Children. Baron Mustache. Oh, just get spent. One man mustache like Madonna is the Madonna of the Bonneau. But, I mean, he is a rock star. He played the Janney

Oh, mustache Jenny Well played. We, of course, mean clean.

He came in the out

in that tiny Zamboni that doesn't big

floor wax and wane talkies and body. I always thought it was a Waxer. No sign of eyes. It Zamboni is that

came off the end of the line. Wrong

gets cheap and he rides him around. The crystal mustache is he's a lot like CIA. His mustache covers his whole face that no one knows who looks. That's

gorge. And it starts up around for a little rings. Forehand Just below the hairline, the mustache begins.

Have you have you guys ever accidentally called that banks to his face?

Oh, no. You didn't know that we we were chipped. I said, like your banks and he

beat my ass. Yes. Yeah, I got killed. No, I mean,

I heard he swept you

up into a dust pan dumped in the trash. Yeah. Yeah. My biggest fear. Getting stuck in a trash can happened along

you put you into one of those trash skins that's open only outside open only.

Yeah. Yeah, that sucked. Damn. Well, not

as much as the vacuum that sucked you up out of the trash can.

Yeah, that was tough. It every second. That was tough.

It was weird that they couldn't

just use hands or a claw or some sort of lifting. They had to vacuum you out.

Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people they said, don't want to touch him.

Well, they had to use one of those sort of warehouse vacuums. Suck up shopping, shot. I was thinking bigger. Like a packing peanuts. Yeah, It looks like a big elephant elephant trunk that they go out. You went straight up into the roof like one type of

end light. Yeah, like the kid from Wonka Augustus Group. Look, just like going to shoot Well, yeah, That's a bummer. You should have never You should have never said Nice bang. That's no. Last night I said I want. When I first met him, I said, Hey, mustache must bangs. Um and I actually got diluted into a bottle of Lysol and then split up between multiple spray bottles to make it go for about last long.

That explains a lot about yes,

I was that

you were really lemony and

clean. Yes, yes, I was so clean. And everybody while that that same time everywhere said,

I just saw you

at the grocery store two minutes ago, but you're also here.

But I also see you with the automotive on the floor of the house.

And they were right. I was split up all around town,

everywhere my gender's Did

I just see

where my dog pee, Pete.

You did. You did

Well, you know, I

think we're

kind of burying the lead here, you know, were going into the New Year and we kind of is a group decided we're gonna get on the dating APS way. We've been on the APS the past week. This is the big news on. And that's the big big news we all got. I don't know if we got in the same home for different maps. I

don't know which dad did you get on top?

Obviously. Bagel meats, Coffee. Uh uh.

Oh. So is this for retreats or dating?

What do you mean,

no? If you have coffee you

want you want to get Baykal, you swipe side five, Bigot. A bagel?

No, no, no, no. This is

if you have a cup of coffee and you want to be able to go with that, you keep swipe until you find the baby you want.

So I got a what? It's a metaphorical

earth, literal. I Well, I think I got honestly, I think I got bigger fish. I swiped and found a beautiful pop receive

wear. You were telling us You're like, I'm going to my car. You know, you rolled like that, Todd, you said I'm eating at this public parking. A concrete picnic tape. Yeah,

yeah, we're the concrete table. Kim, with my coffee piping hot. And I don't know, I don't want to be rude or I don't want to be rude. I I think I got two ends of a whole week no whole wheat loaf.

You got way. You have two ends of

a loaf of whole wheat bagel. Wow. So what had clearly baked a whole wheat loaf and cut off the ends, or like, this isn't even a

last little little ovals like, wow,

little ovals. And I think it said it was gonna be slanted and cream cheese. I think that was Crisco.

Ends up a Crisco sandwich with the ends of a

wheat loaf. Yeah, and I don't think it was locks. I think it was catfish. So I got

that is no bigger than

a big rock. Chunky white fish? I think so. But, you know, you don't want to be rude

on the first day

you came in your

injury, your big insult that a bagel fish would put catfish on your body. Oh, wow. I'm sure you came in with a big

stung lip swole up lip and we realized, Is that a hickey? That's right. And I said

Yes.

Yes. That was one of those really sexy lip Hickey's

Jonathan Lepic. Everybody knows Jonathan living, If

you would lift weighs £8.

Yes. We're not talking about lip. Nikki. Jonathan Litt. Vicky's a famous man around town. Biggest, biggest top lip because it

gets a hickey's wife Always getting big top.

Picky. Yes, I came baiting. You guys said looking live picky Walking a said Yes. Yes, yes. I gotta live picky from my lips. Suck down by my date But I'm coming clean now I think I ate a end of a whole wheat with Crisco into the rock happen.

Now, is this the only day you've been on? Or have you had other experience? Yeah, you're looking for for mates,

for love or something casual. Anyway, way in the market

for I think I'm looking for I think I at the end of the day, I'm looking for you know, im nearing the ladder. I would say 3/4 of my

life. You

think you're finished with 1/4?

That's right. Yes, your hair. I think it's going to be honest. You're in this bad

shape as old as you are, and you're still alive. So

maybe you're right. If you're a

quarter of the way through your planning to live to 250 Well, you know, Sorry. 300 with modern

technology. I'm just hearing

they just built you a bunch of new hearts out of stem cells. It is the first thing, and you warm all out in a week. You wore brand new hearts all out. You know, you were in sick for

a while. And you can't have coffee and, you know, on then the first day back, you have the biggest part of Joe you've ever had. You drink a pint of West. A

lot of people said you got rid of those hearts too early, though. Is like you took out fresh batteries and threw in the trash. I

know. I mean, those things once you use them once, they're no good. So, yeah, I rode through those hearts and what's you know, they can make him for your Italian blasting. I'm on. I'm on Obama care. And so the countries paying for it, uh, you know, that's all your taxes going into my Newhart's.

What about you guys? Because we've all been on the APs enticing.

Ah, let's see. All right. Why? I mean, I I have I can tell you guys, my experience has been honestly pretty fun for me. Uh,

because I know you have been talking about hinge, which is like friends of friends,

you know? Yeah. No, I don't do any of the classic ones felling industry. And it feels like it doesn't sort of speak to me in the way that coffee coffee meets bagel speaks todo eso. I actually got ah, got on one called Let's save it and it's a It's a dating app specifically for guys who have tons of sex to find virgins for them to be with

explaining the O

time with. At least that's a mission says that's what That's what I after I

heard everybody on There's a version. So obviously they mean the women. So I of course not a virgin anymore. So I got on there. Ah, and I'm looking for ah, pure woman.

No, I think you subconsciously ended up on one where you everyone was, what you are, which is a virgin.

I

don't know. I think I think I'm looking for somebody who can sort of just have the same values as me and obviously like virgin. Okay.

Yeah. I don't know. You always talk

about values. You blame your virginity on your values, but I've never seen you

go losers. Not about

yeah, like you've never held any

type of, you know, societal.

The only 2000 value that I've seen are your lawn and your cast iron.

Yeah, because I've seen you

have a couple sprinters and say, I'll do anything

way Obviously saying you fucked up off a spritzers and say you will do any valueless is what I heard.

You know, we went when you go and you gotta taste the spritzer in Italy, I mean, you lost all value. All

those

guys in Italy make those spritzers way too strong.

You lose your

values when you drink a spritzer.

They were literally. Hey, I hate to use the word play, but they were virgin spritz.

Too many bubbles. It's too. Too much of

a bite. You can't swallow it. It's too spicy.

Yeah, I did notice you spitting out in that Italian restaurant.

We found you behind the window at the red light district in Amsterdam. Way in Italy.

You had a map when it ah face Fela

lipstick behind the glass in the red light district. I was relaxing.

Okay, that's what it's the lack thinks that's what those windows are did look, you were crammed into a a viewing booth. Yeah, that's those

windows air for just the people who have been working a lot. They go in there, relax. That's what those ladies in there are. People wanted their quarters back, everybody. But it was also a peep show on the other side. You could see it for free, out the window in the front. But if you go inside, you get a little peep show. Uh, and yet people did did ask for major refunds when I was like, I don't care. I need this money on. I gave it back to him. I don't care. I see.

You know, I think the big thing, if we're all going into dating, I think a big thing is just a meeting. Some stuff about yourself to yourself. I admit your virgin and it will make your relationships a lot easier. Have

you

seen what happens when you tell people you're a virgin, guys? Uh, no. Other than the times we film your first states. Now, listen, I'm gonna turn the mic off really quick and okay, I started going to come clean with you guys. Let's turn it off, private. Okay, Pops, I guys, I am a virgin. I'm a virgin. I'm a virgin. And it's tough for me because I feel like all the kids here, this podcast, the kids all here, this podcast, and then they're going to be like, Oh, Mr Levis is a virgin. I have more sex than misled. Mr Loomis. You know, there

was another secrets, huh? Another secret that just came in.

No, that's not a secret about I I just think, you know, I just want you guys to know I am a virgin. But on the podcast, from now on, I'm gonna pie big that I'm not a virgin. OK, well back. Yeah, Yeah. Just please do it convincingly. Were in. Okay. All right. Just do whatever you think. A soon as we're back on air, do whatever you think is the most concern. A convincing person who's had a lot of sex. Just lead with it. Big, loud sentence, okay? And recording live. I dated a girl. Put my dick in her pussy.

Wow. Oh, God, bleep. That whole sentence.

Okay, I got Howard's back. He's

am. That was, um that was out of nowhere, but we buy it. We buy we really quickly. I I've been doing the at

one for me. One for you. Um, which is a very good dating app. It's Ah, Scorsese made that one, right? Yes. So? So one date is me at home. I

make a meal for myself. You're there, you don't

eat. I watch whatever I want. You say nothing. Um Ah, we have sex, and that's it. And then the next one is Ah, And then we'll do one for me. So way. So

the one and the one for me is where I don't even see you. There's one for you, one for me. So you see what I mean? It's

a date and then a night home, But by yourself, not even a date. It's a day

of a feeling that most people on this our socio

far there other people have you matched with anybody? Might just be a bunch of

different bill. There might just be you and Scorsese.

I was so far me of, um, anyone.

Ah, let's see who's on their Ah, who have I met? Um,

you told me you were gonna

go some of the Marty recently.

Yes, me and Marty score. Um, we went on a day. Ah, and then there was yet. So it was one for May one for you. So,

Marty. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm dating Martin Scorsese. He makes me dress up like a mobster all the time And films me constantly go into the fish market. It doesn't cause me around. He makes you put cocaine and fish husks, and he, um he fucks me with a Tommy gun.

But also, you have to admit, he's also a genius.

He's a genius. One of the best directors

of all time. You in arguably him and De Niro best best cinema duo of all time.

I tell you what, we don't have enough geniuses out there who are obsessed with guns and men. It is so cool. I mean, it's like my favorite thing in the world. These geniuses,

all of his movies

last 20 years. I

mean, if you see

gangs in New York, it's 3.5 hours of genius and its people talking crazy. I mean, I love this guy. This is what we need more of. I mean more. Give this guy more money, more

under, like Is he going abroad now? Is he going to give us something

else? look, Azadeh security. What? Ma'am? I just like a

second story. Well, it's like a 2nd 1

If your movie does not speak to 15 year old boys and 42 year old boys, you're not a genius. He's living the dream of every teenager in the world. OK, walking around on those big, high heeled shoes.

Yeah, well, don't forget high toe thes guy. Just everybody knows, but the picture of Robert De Niro and big Stack shoes that was not for the filming that was De Niro accidentally

war Scorsese shoes. Scorsese's high heels.

Yeah, so So, yeah,

we're together. Yes. And of course, me Sammy webs, of course. Of course. I'm on, not tricked dot com s. So far, I've gone out on a lot of legitimate dates, and it's been

really fun.

It's for people who keep getting tricked, and they want just finally, to not get finally an

honest dating site. So you pay $100 upfront per day, and then you have to take them to somewhere. That's $3 signs or more.

Ah, find a paywall, huh? It's behind a paywall if you wanted. Yeah, sure. Do you? Do you think

the identity theft is related. Mine? Yeah. No, no, because

I know you're

dealing with that now

is No. But I respond to a lot of emails, you know? So it could be from any of them, right? Could have been from not a trip.

Your email signature is it's so

show my thumbprint and my birth

certificate has been sent from my iPhone.

Yes, but I know who I am. That's why.

Well, we should take a quick pissed, uh, I

piss. We mean break two p. Yes.

It will be right back.

All right, guys. Thanks so much for sticking it out through the break. We really appreciate it. Thank you. Way

missed you.

Thank you so much. You know, we don't say it enough. We do appreciate our listeners on that. You guys give it Give give us your time and you sticking around through his brain slobs. Thank you were really excited. We got a guest in the lounge today. Honestly, it couldn't come at a better time. Obviously, sometimes tensions get a little high in the lounge. Eso it's It's great that we could have her here today. We'd like to welcome our guests. Miscik who is the ahead of the conflict Mediation Club here on on campus. Misic, Mrs Eggs. Sorry. That's fine. Thanks so much for being here. We appreciate it,

High boy. Me? This is nice. What a set up. I

already feel calmer having you in here. You have such a calm presence. Ah ha. It's good that you run conflict mediation.

I I dio and I You know, I have to say I haven't seen any of you boys in the club, which is fine. Which means you must not have had a lot of conflict. So can adults go? I mean, I think anyone can go. Okay,

so we go. The Conflict Mediation

Club is a club where students in the school help a mediate conflict for any 23 parties can be, uh,

conflict. Mediation is as you guys may or may not know. Ended up. You all helped handle my divorce.

Yeah, which we were saying. You need to get a lawyer, and you're like, I'm gonna save a couple of pennies. And would you have 1/4 grader?

I had 1/4 grader, and in the end, it costs me a lot of pennies and alimony in So

he decided he told you not

to take the stand, and you did it. Anyway,

I took the stand around divorce. That's right. Um,

missing, did you?

You saw him come in there and lay it all out. His case

and that was it. That was a tricky one. But, you know, this is what I love. I love human emotions. And we always saying in my conflict mediation course, there's no conflict. We can't mediate. Oh, that's nice. Because of the end of the day, we're all humans.

I think I think that maybe sort of speaks to the issue that sometimes I see the coming out of the conflict mediation class issue. No, it's just time conflict. Sometimes it seems like kids go in there to resolve a conflict. And I hate to say it cause I don't want to say that you're not good at the job, but sometimes sort of treat them with kid gloves and those kids come out still in conflict or maybe in worse shape than when they went in there.

Now, can you restate that in an I statement?

Oh, our You must I I think sometimes the Conflict Mediation Club causes more conflict than it does fix conflict. Wow. So with passive aggressive to an actual sentence.

Now listen to this. Watch and learn, fellas. I hear that you think that the conflict mediation class causes more conflict than it causes mediations sometimes. Did I understand you properly? Yeah,

absolutely. 100%.

This pisses me off. I don't like to listen to my words. Spoke back to me. I'm sorry.

And why is that, do you think?

I don't know. I think you're pissing me

off. Sam. Sam pacing.

I'm sensing a little bit of of anger. Is that an accurate description?

You're sensing it. I told you I was angry.

Oh, I pissed

now I to see someone so connected to their emotions. It is just such a

I'm not having visions. I'm not having emotion, Sam. I'm not

now, Mrs IQ. We are now in an inception of conflict. Mediation is conflict. Radiation caused the new copy. I top over here.

It's not. It's not going away.

I am curious to see how you handle this. Now, this is a real test of your skills, and I We're for very angry on combative men. So this will be very interesting.

Now, I understand that this is a very uncomfortable moment because we're five consenting adults who are sitting here in our feelings and raise your hand. If you're feeling uncomfortable right now, I know I am. Now,

I ain't encourage

us all to just let's just take this in and forest long as we possibly can. Let's just try to sit here in the silence.

Oh, God. Are

you gonna

have a rebuttal to his? He's trashing the cunt.

Okay, I'm gonna sit. So now I'm gonna sit in silence.

I think it's going to be a little bit difficult, but let's just see what we can Dio.

Okay. Mm.

You're shaking. What's happening right now? What do you feeling?

I'm getting pissed off. I've never I've never taken a moment to simply sit.

And I'm immediately crying

for having the

most drug. Sam broke five pencils in a row. God,

we're having a breakthrough.

Do you see this? This is these tears

that are rolling down your cheeks. Fake fake.

You You You guys, look here. I see. I see that you're calling it fake, and I hear that and phone call really going t o do it are here that

you're telling me? Fucking It makes me pissed.

Keep going. Take it for deeper. I see that your business and I am pissed now, Teoh. And I'm sad. Now take your mother's hand's Everyone hold hands, Take each other's hand. This is the lady's fault, Sam. Sam is turning

red, but he is all right. Wait. Sam is crying.

Also I e to love me to you.

Wow. I think we have a mediation weight. The oh, no. Woe boundaries. Put up a boundary. Okay, That was good. It almost went too far. And I'm glad we stopped it. I'm impressed.

You know, I honestly I I had had a couple of kids come out, and

maybe they were

just like putting on a show when they came out. Like I'm still mad. But if

you could

do that to these two guys, let me tell you, these two men out of the most repressed men who've ever lived, lived on the

West. Todd put out a fan as if he was at church Teoh. And he's hearing

the truth. Yes, a man. These I mean, because you would mean Mrs they were so in touch with our feelings. I can

sense that about you.

Thank you. Yes, you're feeding the beast.

You're what I like to call an inside out guy. So the inside

of your not describing colostomy

bag You're wearing your emotions.

Underclothes, with you

on your on your body is what I'm saying,

person. Why I'm an actor by trade and by nature and eso that's where it comes from.

Well, that that's your livelihood To be able to access the deep recesses of the human experience. I mean, that's I think actors should be paid as much as the president.

Well, I want my president to take $1 out of, you know, just sees a billionaire's. I only took $1 out

of principle. Now, Mrs is what I find is people who are really good at fixing others sometimes have a lot of trouble fixing themselves. What's going on in your personal life? Do you feel pretty happy with everything? 0 60

minutes. Well, I have to say I feel seen. Wow. Um, yeah, I'm in the middle of a messy divorce, so I said it.

Okay. Massive. You feel seen by us? Because you can tell we've all been through a message.

I know every single person in this room has been through a very messy divorce.

My wish, but yes. Is

that accurate

in well, in their Moyle and I have been through

the emotions that are associated with a messy divorce, but not with

the typically. I'm going. I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe you're forcing me to move out there saying we were never in a relationship. I don't really know you intimately your my tenant.

Yeah, because it's not just a marriage that can end in divorce. There are so many types of relationships. That's right. You know, sometimes you have to divorce your friends. Sometimes you have to divorce your hats.

Wow. Well, that I miss. Is

it? Have you ever divorced a pet?

I had three Siamese cats. Beautiful, usually livable Siamese cats. Well, I had to give him away because Sean, technically, they were his cats when we got together. And so he's taking them.

Thought you gave away, as in.

So in the divorce from Sean, you also filled out divorce papers with each of the

cats. That's right. Tha This is Sean Combs. Puff Daddy P Diddy. Wow. Is this

Yeah. Sean Combs. Wow.

Thank you for being mature about it. Bill, you really put it out there.

I'm sorry. Somebody Sean so clear. It's P. Diddy.

It was pretty clear.

Oh, it's Sean Combs, though. It close bell

differently least mes Yes. It's not the famous rapper. No, but he does go by P. Diddy,

Puff Puff, Puff P. Diddy and Puffy Daddy. Actually, that bee sting got him pretty puffy. And, yes, father of three kids and

p p E d. And he is the p e coach.

Yes, that's it. Here's what I'm wondering. You are so calm. You are so centered. How did you learn these skills? Of what conflict? Negotiation. Mediation. How did you get that? Because I'm unhinged. And I could never do this for anyone else.

The key is you have to hit rock bottom before you can come back up and be so centered. But I do four hours of yoga every morning. I take it I take a morning swim. Every day I walk down to the nearest body of water and I plunge into a freezing pool. Sometimes it's a puddle.

Yes, you are your body is ravaged for the listening

I don't have externally, There's no fat on my body. If you noticed that, I have.

Okay, we'll have to say that when I love to make that observation. There is, uh, not any fat on your body.

Has been dying to say this ever since

you walked in here, Mrs C. Yeah,

well, just you seem cold. You know, you seem freezing skeletal, which I relate to

you because you went

to the doctor and they said you have your negative fat on your body. Your body is in fact, deficit.

I'm in fat deficit. I am giving fat to the air and some sort of reverse fat osmosis. Uh,

yeah. I mean, like, all of our

cholesterol went up from recording. If you sit around me, yeah, you're gonna get a little

you. You said you swim. You do four hours of yoga and take a morning swim

in your own yourself into a coal of freezing. You're still here at school before everybody else. Seven.

30 in the morning. Sometime.

How do you What? You what time you wake up? You oclock.

You

have to have your gonna be

center. Do you have to have a morning ritual, but yeah, Every day I go toe, I go to bed at 4 p.m. I will wake up normally for a snacks around seven.

Dinner. You guys, before you wake back up for

what is your normal? What is your usual seven PM snap?

Sometimes it's Ah, vegan pasta.

That's like

a really dinner. Maybe steak and potato. So

I don't eat me.

Oh, right now about my birthday. Oh, wow. Does your stomach handle that? You really go to town? You are up there, the barbecue place going nuts. I

go straight into the barbecue around back where the smoker is blurry back there their

birthdays. Christmas, The place is closed. She rips it apart.

Just talk about getting the meat off the bone.

Oh, my God. I including the head. Last year I consumed I consumed a £15 pig

pig. But Teoh on you ate the head off the skull. So, like going on the way. Well, you did put their studio things in the side of it. Kind of rotating around Rose. Why don't you just let you have to have a little bit of meat throughout on your birthday Christmas. Why don't you just have a meat dinner once

a month or so?

Well, you live like Christ, I guess,

because breaking into barbecue place it's

the information. I don't want the inflammation because that's the source of disease.

I don't know if I buy it, but I've heard that

you are so wise. I just after you you fixed up that first conflict for me. I really seeing things. And

it's really it is crazy

to me how you come in and we typically are. Just as Sam said, flying off the handle,

losing

our minds. Very aggressive, angry guests. You

bring

such a just low key energy.

Where's my French crawler? What? I put a French cruller up tied on eight That know what have you fucking always raises? A My French crueler. Are there other kinds of colors?

The door? No, but minus friends.

Okay. Taught I had a guy, I ate half of it. I'll admit it. I ate half of it.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. All right,

all right. Let's talk it out, boys.

Let's see toward pursuing.

I feel like Howard is dead to me. And tonight, if you if you end up falling asleep. You're not gonna wake up cause I'm gonna kill you.

Kill him. That kill his ass over the cross is they have no idea how to respond.

Corolla killer.

Well, Howard, how your Howard? Yes. How are you feeling right now?

I feel scared. I feel like I

believe it is wrong. Mr. Trebek. Carla Greller killing. I feel I feel

like, uh honestly, um I feel like this is a more aggressive energy than I've ever received from Todd. So it feels like maybe it's it's hooked to some other thing that I've donor said recently that makes him this angry

justice. Wrong. This is it wrong again? Well, Mrs it has a feel to know

who's right and who's wrong. There's no conflict or is off. The man's dead and five hours.

I don't

see right and wrong. I great, because I

Am I

talking about my skin again?

Now, let's be

clear. We're not talking about a white crawler, are we? What

are we

really talking about here?

Yeah, that's that. Yeah, I did. I ate half of your snack, okay? And I'm sorry.

I didn't realise it was

yours. Maybe you can't afford your crow. You keep getting promotions, promotions.

Tell me about the

pie. Can't control Howard's promotion. I can't control that. The principal sees me doing a good

job and give me more classes. Gives me more

about toe. Hand me a promotion. And so you walked by,

Howard, Get everything he ever wants.

It seems like it doesn't. How does that

make you feel?

Like the world is a little bit

wrong. Sometime.

And when you were a child, did you have an older sibling who got everything they wanted?

Todd, an older sibling. They got everything they wanted. Yeah. Yeah, I did, actually. And then well, he met an unfortunate end, and we never got to talk it out, but yes.

And you're worried the same things gonna happen to your best friend? How

worried that I'm going to die. And we're never gonna be ableto work through this

conflict. I don't have time alone. Would look me in the eyes. Todd, We're friends, Dammit! I love you, Todd.

Do you hear

him? I love you. And when I ate that course, so I think that crueler It wasn't

because I wanted to take something from you.

It's because I wanted to be able to share an experience with you later. When I say What's that Crueler. Pretty good. What's wrong with ugly face? I don't even remember why it was mad in the first bullets. Move

on, Mrs Ig. Let's

move on. What do you mean you don't remember? I It's the cooler.

No, I gotta pee.

Todd knows. Confront this. Uh huh. Mrs said, can we move in with you? This was such a

beautiful moment. You got them to really connect with each other. And also maybe Todd admitted that he

murdered his brother. Hey, Mr a town mystery for years.

And that's what I

dio that's all you ever use this, like in your own life? Like Like, what's your biggest conflict?

Well, as I mentioned, Shawn's left and he's taking the Siamese is. So I'm in the middle of ah, horrible divorce and ah, yeah. I mean, I

use my

conflict mediation skills not just in relationships that are important to me, but every day I go by my morning latte. Hey, I'm using conflict mediation with the barista.

It's always a conflict.

Life is conflict.

What is the daily conflict with your Bruce over a lot.

I mean, sometimes the foams just not right. No, You know what I mean?

Yes. So that's a really I'm the barista. Uh, I just handed you your lot.

I take a sip, I spit it out, I go. This foam, it's not enough. It's too much espresso to foam ratio. I throw the coffee on the ground big, and I say, What have you done to me?

Why would you do this to

me? What about me is triggering you so that you purposefully sabotaged my lot.

And this is the same barista every

every day, Getting closer to getting it right on. No, no, no. I

mean, I can't tell

you how many times they've called the police on me and I have had

Oh, my God, it this happens to me everywhere I go. Yeah, And had, you know, isn't it the worst? I mean, people are

just so trigger happy with the 911.

Exactly. It's like you run into one person's car. Definitely your fault while you're driving in their driving and it's like,

put put, put

911. Yeah, And when that

person's a cop, they'll call the place even faster,

Insane. You had

a gun pulled on you by the copy it while he was on foot. Unbelievable. They just slow down, down Need these conflict resolution things for other times I deal with the police. Well,

let's I want to know about a conflict I have in my own life. And maybe you could help me. Not enough. You guys have any in your lives, But so, um, I find that where this teacher's lounge is a shared space, You know, everybody in here should be taking care of the space equally. But I find I'm always the one cleaning up my bed after I sleep in here. I'm the one washing all the sheets. You know, um, I'm the one. You know, if I leave my dishes in the sink there, in there the next day and it's like, don't you think everybody should contribute to that? Clean up

your a man child Eyes that accurate. Does that sound accurate?

I hear my man, but I do look young. A man that looks young

thing This goes Teoh. I'm actually working on a book not to drop a

bomb to be in the film.

He's an actor

I see

if they're making a movie, it would be the film. But that's a big bomb. Shows this. Is this a Are we getting the exclusive

on this? Well, I haven't started it yet, but, I mean, I'm in the phase where I'm marinating on it.

That's the most important.

So I'm gonna address this in the book. It's the burden of shared work on all that. You do the rest.

OK, so maybe we'll talk this through. I

get it. I think that that happens A lot of times, for example, may be the reason around campus that I'm getting these promotions is because the principal sees me as the only person who actually, I don't know, does his job actually is a good teacher.

Now this is pissing me off. This is definitely I do

all the way to the

moon and

back. But my mother also, how

about this? I'll do a nice steak tonight statement to address it. I sometimes feel like, ah, the other teachers at the school, uh, don't actually care about their jobs or about bettering the lives of students. And they care only about themselves.

Mrs. Sick are I statements?

All supposed t I feel. And then an accusation about somebody

else. That's exactly right. Okay, Well, in that case, I feel like I come in here every day with a new, better hairstyle, and no one ever says a thing. I go on these long weekend trips, I come back with more luxurious hair, and I I comb it around and nobody says a

thing. You feel unseen,

unseen. I

did. I tell you what. Your hair is seen, Bill.

It looks does it look real and knew it looks and I and I grows on that

either feels riel or new, but I can't give you both a

fortune. What can you give me? One? Okay, Just looks new. Okay? It leg really new. Thank you, Bill. I see your new hair. And what else is there to dok? Good. That's all you have felt. Good. Okay. These

I statements, I think are good. It's getting us to sort of come back to ourselves a little bit. And

nobody congratulated me at all when I shot the best round of my life last

weekend when we went golfing. Well, Bill, that's because by anyone's standards, it was a horrible

room 1 26 four e shot a 1 26 on four, which was a par three course on four. I've always airheaded. Well, I don't know, but I only ran over one person in the card and they're handicapped with severe afterwards.

You want a compliment for that?

I would like to get

a compliment for shooting 126 on four consecutive for threes and running over a man in severing his spinal cord. Could I get a thank you? Will they? I saw you do all of that, but thank you. You're welcome. Thank you. You will call, right.

Mrs. What is your I statement of? You know, we know you're going through this messy divorce. As you said. Do you have a nice statement? You'd like to share your working on this book, Which I see that and with again love to be seen in the movie. Um, is there something that you're you know, even how you're feeling around all of us? Um, you know, I may be getting started. I feel like you guys have taught me a lot or anything like that. Uh, you guys have helped open my mind. up? I don't know whatever years is, but those are some

options I taught you how to do I statement, so I don't need the course. Okay. I feel that Bill, uh, has a deep seated need for validation. Great statement. True. I feel that Howard has a fear of failure. Doom. I feel that Sam has a fear of vulnerability. No.

Wow. Those were I

feel that Todd has ah fear. Um,

stop you right there. I don't know. I don't hear anything. So

of success.

I know. Todd, How

can I fear something I've never had?

Wow it. Question now that

how can the fear successive He's never even touched to the little

How can you not fear success if you've had it

alone? My hair just fell out.

Oh, What do you mean it will? Cleaning up the hair like an addict. You just dropped the last bit of cocaine. Rubber Get on his head like it's his gums. I thank you. Thank you for saying that. I'll tell you one thing. Mistake. You got right about me.

And it's deep seed. Go on, Go

on. You know what I made? Five. Somebody give me a five

I'm hanging here. They'll shut Europe's somebody. Give me a five year gross. Come on. Grounds deep seed seeds

of hair that were planted in your head cause it's yes,

the deep seed are you? I am. You know, I'm a single woman and I am looking to maybe have a child on my own one day. Really? So after this, anyone wanted to go

deep sea diving. Hey,

so you're talking about you're playing the meaning of all of us. Is potential sperm donor.

That's right. Or actual partners. Not absolutely no donor?

No. Have you seen Sean? He is so hot.

That shot comes the PT teacher on campus. Ce didi Hey is incredibly hot. I mean, eight pack. As

you know, my

pistol is getting bypass. Didi its previous versions. Elliott Didi It's ped p. Elliott did e e o has a bad.

He's very handsome, so I don't take it as an insult that you're more attracted to him than any of us. But I will take it as a compliment that you are interested in maybe having my child.

Maybe. I mean, listen, listen, I never know

what the future holds. I don't pretend to have all the answers. I

don't know if

a Sean and I might get back together. Does he have a restraining order against me? Yes, it does. It expires in three months. Yes,

you could get expiration date on.

Did you get the expiration Tater? Did he?

I got it from I have my way.

Way. So in three months, you're trying again.

That's right.

So it's a messy divorce, Mostly on your end. Having trouble?

I'm screaming into a

void. One of us trying to resolve. I could see how that could be really difficult. You're over here making I statements, and he's often the Caymans with some new woman or some.

Well, just like in the case when

you ate there, because you don't want to see me mad

while I'd actually maybe I don't

I don't know if he blocked you on Instagram, but he is posting a lot of photos from the Caymans with another woman.

Is that right way? Take a pee

here. Look on. Weighty Diddy Combs. Absolute. Okay, here he is

in the Caymans right here. What? You think that's

that woman? She looks a lot like you. I use one way you could tell.

You're clutching your cup of

tea. I am going. Teoh, There

is the foam over the top. Squeezed it. Okay, way My And she

just hopped into a tiny cup of water doing laps back and forth.

I think my meniscus My knee She space

your legs so hard that your any hot?

Okay, Mrs. Now this is the type of imperfection that I like

way love to

see people come off their high horse.

I will say, going back and looking at that photo again. That was not a woman that looked like you. That was just him with a manta ray. He was getting a manta ray.

I do look like a manta ray. I get it all the time.

Beautiful. My body shape. You are about to get where you

are two dimensional When you turn

it in the front.

You're not so much curvy

is you are triangular.

I messed slim as I am wide.

That's straight.

Well, Mrs Ig, thank you for popping your top here and public. Sam, stop jerking his head off. But we were actually we're gonna I feel that we have run out of time today, but I appreciate your conflict.

Mediation here. Thank you.

Well, I feel grateful for the opportunity. I feel ashamed and embarrassed of my little episode, and I will be sending an invoice. Oh,

Oh, for the

This pisses me off. Well, we'll

deal with that off Mike. But again, Mrs Thanks so much for stopping in the last day. Like we enjoyed talking to you on everybody else out there. Thanks for listening. Next time, stay.