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s11e01

Kangaroo Jacked

Originally aired: August 2, 2022

The Teachers are back! They discuss their new business venture to prove their worth to Hamilton High School.

0:00:30 Unknown Speaker #1

Y'all hydrate it? Make sure you're hydrated.

0:00:32 Unknown Speaker #2

Wow. Wow.

0:00:32 Unknown Speaker #3

Is it good? You guys gotta try the smoothies.

0:00:34 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, wow.

0:00:35 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, yeah. It sounded

0:00:36 Unknown Speaker #2

pretty loose smoothie. I made Todd this smoothie pretty good. Right?

0:00:36 Unknown Speaker #4

like a

0:00:41 Unknown Speaker #3

It's incredibly loose. Sam's fried. It's one of the looser smoothies I've had.

0:00:44 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. It's a little too watery. I can't quite get the consistency.

0:00:49 Unknown Speaker #5

What is technically the difference between a smoothie and a juice?

0:00:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, sweetie has to has has solids in it.

0:00:55 Unknown Speaker #2

You know how you they turn the blizzard upside down and

0:00:58 Unknown Speaker #4

stay in the cup.

0:01:00 Unknown Speaker #2

My smoothies are the opposite

0:01:01 Unknown Speaker #3

of this.

0:01:02 Unknown Speaker #2

They're somehow more liquid than water. Mhmm. Which I didn't even know that was possible.

0:01:07 Unknown Speaker #3

Right? Your thing is if you give someone a smoothie and they tip their cup upside down and it spills all over that's a good smoothie.

0:01:13 Unknown Speaker #2

That's a good smoothie. That's the one and and I do it I've done it after almost every smoothie this morning. I've dumped them on all the It's not working. Opposite Blizzard showcase.

0:01:23 Unknown Speaker #5

Right.

0:01:24 Unknown Speaker #2

He's not working. How

0:01:25 Unknown Speaker #5

i thought It is it is attention grabbing.

0:01:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:01:28 Unknown Speaker #5

It's at the front of the gym, and we are trying to get people you know, looking around.

0:01:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:01:33 Unknown Speaker #2

And Falling down on spills is not what we were going for, but it's causing a commotion Yes.

0:01:33 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:01:39 Unknown Speaker #5

People are definitely falling down on spills.

0:01:41 Unknown Speaker #2

And people are slowing down on the street to be like, who's that getting escorted out of there in that So super upright ambulance bed.

0:01:54 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, it's it's important.

0:01:55 Unknown Speaker #2

We know it's a one.

0:01:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. Because we have so many people getting carded out of this thing, they have to put two in back to back.

0:02:02 Unknown Speaker #5

So they put them it's like yeah.

0:02:02 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:02:04 Unknown Speaker #1

You're like book ins. It's like you have book ins.

0:02:06 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Two book ins. Well, well, we've put some books in between them.

0:02:10 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, we don't need the books.

0:02:12 Unknown Speaker #2

We don't need the books We're getting time to get books out of the back.

0:02:14 Unknown Speaker #3

No. We're kidding, Paul,

0:02:15 Unknown Speaker #2

you heard yourself, we used them bookends. They blow them in their ambulets, and, of course, they snuck by goodwill. They had donate. Donate, of course.

0:02:21 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:02:21 Unknown Speaker #3

You have to donate your face. Of course. You have to Well, before we

0:02:28 Unknown Speaker #2

get going, because we're having a good time. Hello, Bill Cravie.

0:02:32 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, are

0:02:32 Unknown Speaker #1

I was burning?

0:02:32 Unknown Speaker #3

you starting?

0:02:34 Unknown Speaker #3

Are you saying hi to us?

0:02:35 Unknown Speaker #1

Hang on.

0:02:35 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, I'll say hey to y'all.

0:02:36 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, yeah. I'll feel good.

0:02:38 Unknown Speaker #2

Hey, hi. Yeah.

0:02:39 Unknown Speaker #5

Hey, now

0:02:39 Unknown Speaker #1

Howard, love us.

0:02:40 Unknown Speaker #3

what's happening just like we always do.

0:02:42 Unknown Speaker #1

Gotta say,

0:02:42 Unknown Speaker #2

and then that while we

0:02:44 Unknown Speaker #3

get embarrassed if we forgot someone's name. Isn't that right?

0:02:48 Unknown Speaker #2

Somewhere around. Don't remember anyone in that moment.

0:02:51 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. I

0:02:52 Unknown Speaker #1

think we should just go in and get it going. Yeah.

0:02:54 Unknown Speaker #4

Let's hit it.

0:02:55 Unknown Speaker #1

Alright. Here we go. Well, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another season of the teacher's lounge. What once was the first best and only podcast pertaining to issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community. Now, issues relevant to your four favorite teachers. Howard Levis. That's me and my three buddies.

0:03:14 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Hello, Phil Cravy.

0:03:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Hi, Todd Podrey feminist.

0:03:20 Unknown Speaker #5

Hi, Sam Weatherman, formerly mental health, still mental health, and adding physical health.

0:03:27 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. That's great.

0:03:28 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right. I'm a trainer.

0:03:29 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. And a lot of people are probably wondering a lot of people are probably wondering what what's going on, why they tell him the four of us been in Hamilton this school year. Yeah. We're gonna put those put that information out there. We, of course

0:03:43 Unknown Speaker #5

and thank you for all the letters and emails.

0:03:45 Unknown Speaker #5

What the hell is going on? Where the hell are the teachers?

0:03:45 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. We appreciate it.

0:03:48 Unknown Speaker #1

Where people are really upset that we haven't been around the school.

0:03:51 Unknown Speaker #3

How the hell do I know where you are? I don't.

0:03:55 Unknown Speaker #2

What the hell is up?

0:03:57 Unknown Speaker #5

What the hell? I thought I was gonna get another crack at you guys because I got one of those Hell.

0:04:02 Unknown Speaker #2

Are y'all around or not? Hell start with a hell.

0:04:05 Unknown Speaker #3

We've been getting a lot of emails subject as hell dot dot dot. Mhmm.

0:04:10 Unknown Speaker #4

And I

0:04:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:04:10 Unknown Speaker #5

don't know which of those to really read and which of those to discard.

0:04:14 Unknown Speaker #4

Because at

0:04:14 Unknown Speaker #5

some point, it's not healthy to take in all these emails. No.

0:04:17 Unknown Speaker #3

It's not. Oh, I stopped taking a

0:04:18 Unknown Speaker #1

few emails.

0:04:19 Unknown Speaker #6

That's good for you.

0:04:20 Unknown Speaker #3

Heavy mental health wise.

0:04:21 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, I don't

0:04:22 Unknown Speaker #3

i'm gonna get back to you over an email.

0:04:24 Unknown Speaker #2

Not at all. Yeah. You just think you have your my email. I respond? No. No. Todd, you're working with thirty two thousand on revs. Right?

0:04:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah. I I cracked thirty two k.

0:04:38 Unknown Speaker #5

And Congratulations. Well

0:04:40 Unknown Speaker #2

you're taking your time to respond.

0:04:42 Unknown Speaker #3

I and I'm going back to the beginning. So, of course, I'll start with the very first unread email I have.

0:04:49 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Do you wanna donate to George Bush's campaign?

0:04:53 Unknown Speaker #4

Sure.

0:04:55 Unknown Speaker #2

Sure. So you gave GW five grand this week. Is that correct?

0:04:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah. Well,

0:05:00 Unknown Speaker #5

you tried to do it about.

0:05:03 Unknown Speaker #3

My donation bounced. Yes.

0:05:06 Unknown Speaker #1

And who's responsible for the the overdraft fees there? Like, the the chargeback fees You said

0:05:11 Unknown Speaker #3

george It's my definition of fraud. He said to me I said to him read my lips. No new money from me.

0:05:17 Unknown Speaker #1

This is and George Bush the first with

0:05:19 Unknown Speaker #3

robert Herbert Walker Bush.

0:05:20 Unknown Speaker #4

And you have

0:05:21 Unknown Speaker #2

you hold the world record for a bounciest checking account. Is that true?

0:05:25 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Well, I'm sponsored by kangaroos now. And so Jesus.

0:05:32 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, you're there trying to get the word out about themselves. Yeah. And they need something big to attach.

0:05:36 Unknown Speaker #3

Do you remember when that guy that kangaroo was ripping that dog apart so that guy punched these squared off and punched it? Yeah. They made a mural He humiliated kangaroos across the world

0:05:46 Unknown Speaker #3

which are the buffest sexiest men of the animal king. Yes.

0:05:46 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:05:46 Unknown Speaker #5

hold on.

0:05:52 Unknown Speaker #2

They Which we are part of? They're trying to get rid of are there Fox News, I saw a segment the other night. Are there even any kangaroos anymore?

0:06:02 Unknown Speaker #4

Mhmm. Mhmm.

0:06:02 Unknown Speaker #2

They're getting rid of the kangaroo.

0:06:04 Unknown Speaker #5

I don't know if you know this.

0:06:05 Unknown Speaker #3

Getting railed by a kangaroo. It's been really interesting.

0:06:09 Unknown Speaker #5

They're trying to get rid of our kangaroo. They're trying to get masculinity out of the kangaroo. They don't

0:06:16 Unknown Speaker #4

want us to

0:06:16 Unknown Speaker #2

be kangaroos anymore. No. They want us to be soy

0:06:19 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:06:20 Unknown Speaker #5

yeah.

0:06:20 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:06:21 Unknown Speaker #1

Koalas. They want to be koalas.

0:06:21 Unknown Speaker #4

toys.

0:06:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. E e what's his name? E e Milnett, the the the guy that did Winnie the poo. Yeah. Yeah. You know, he we've got Ro, which is a classic and I'm gonna say it pussy. And we need these

0:06:36 Unknown Speaker #2

we're gonna say it. We're going there this

0:06:38 Unknown Speaker #3

season. Uh-huh. And so we need these men kangaroo's back. Mhmm. Gangaroo buff. You'll you'll see some

0:06:46 Unknown Speaker #6

of the You'll see

0:06:46 Unknown Speaker #1

some of the keywords. Yeah. I'll tell you now, you don't need to put Buff on there. Google kangaroo and you will see

0:06:52 Unknown Speaker #4

that's right.

0:06:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Emos, masculine animal that exists in the animal kingdom. You don't even have to say buff. These these guys are Jack.

0:06:58 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. And you tried to carry

0:06:59 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:07:00 Unknown Speaker #2

your son in a little pouch. Right?

0:07:00 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:07:00 Unknown Speaker #5

toll fear.

0:07:03 Unknown Speaker #3

I did. Yeah. So You had

0:07:05 Unknown Speaker #2

a male c section to add a pouch?

0:07:08 Unknown Speaker #3

That's exactly right. I told the doctor, give me a c section. And he said, like, a cesarean, I said, no. Like, kangaroo, sea sector, maybe.

0:07:14 Unknown Speaker #1

In kangaroo section. See sector.

0:07:17 Unknown Speaker #5

You want a kangaroo section right here.

0:07:20 Unknown Speaker #2

He said that's not I used fucking guru?

0:07:22 Unknown Speaker #3

He said that I used fucking guru. I said, well, which one is it? It's not what men get or night. You spoke kangaroo. We're having two arguments to doctor to work in.

0:07:32 Unknown Speaker #1

Doctor k.

0:07:33 Unknown Speaker #3

It's doctor C. Doctor C.

0:07:35 Unknown Speaker #4

Say. Doctor say.

0:07:38 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, hey. I think we're all getting really good. But we took a step away

0:07:42 Unknown Speaker #5

and we're really focused

0:07:42 Unknown Speaker #4

from school,

0:07:43 Unknown Speaker #1

and we do wanna emphasize I know that there was a press release released by Hamilton that said they were placing us on administrative leave But if you weren't consulted

0:07:54 Unknown Speaker #2

if you look at the date on that letter, we stepped away the day before. We we are stepping away.

0:07:59 Unknown Speaker #5

They can say whatever they want after the breakup. I know my truth.

0:08:04 Unknown Speaker #4

Mhmm.

0:08:04 Unknown Speaker #5

I left and they could not say anything to me.

0:08:07 Unknown Speaker #2

Yep. Mhmm. We stepped away.

0:08:09 Unknown Speaker #3

We got out ahead of it. We went on Seth Myers and said, stepping away from the school. We actually have a gym that we're very in love with right now.

0:08:17 Unknown Speaker #5

Absolutely. I you know what? I don't even remember what teaching is like because I'm so into training now.

0:08:23 Unknown Speaker #5

And training is so different than teaching.

0:08:23 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:08:27 Unknown Speaker #1

Because and and everybody probably knows. You you remember the the the wellness center on on thirteenth Street next to the the grocery store.

0:08:38 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Thirteenth Street Wellness Center in disarray. We all remember the article.

0:08:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. That's right.

0:08:44 Unknown Speaker #1

COVID really hit it really hard. Membership sort plummeted over the two years, and they went up on the market. And, you know, the teachers, we're always looking to rehab someone or something. Right? And we we saw as an opportunity.

0:08:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Anyone but us.

0:08:58 Unknown Speaker #1

You take the year that we decided to take -- Yes.

0:09:01 Unknown Speaker #1

for our own mental health and physical health. We decided we're gonna buy the thirteenth Street wellness center and we are going to work on ourselves and work on the community in a different capacity than we have done for the past.

0:09:01 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:09:12 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. I decided to sell my NFT of a pixelated dirty rat, and I really got out top.

0:09:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. It was awesome. That was really huge.

0:09:24 Unknown Speaker #2

And and so I was able to add a little coin in.

0:09:27 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. A lot of people are partnering with athletes and stuff for NFTs.

0:09:30 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:09:31 Unknown Speaker #3

You went with you went with what was it?

0:09:35 Unknown Speaker #5

Pizza rat.

0:09:35 Unknown Speaker #4

Right?

0:09:36 Unknown Speaker #3

Pizza rat?

0:09:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Pizza rat had an n f t. And he he's there's a bunch of different ones. Mhmm. And he has a hat on. He's got a little eyepatch in one. All of them, you can barely tell us

0:09:51 Unknown Speaker #1

a rat.

0:09:51 Unknown Speaker #2

Someone Who's pixelated image you've ever seen? Right. So Yeah. One of them, he's pink. And he's got a little gold chain, but I have the original with the pizza in his mouth. Wow. It was it's a one of a kind. And I So Yeah. I sold it.

0:10:06 Unknown Speaker #1

You sold it in Christina.

0:10:07 Unknown Speaker #3

Some awesome NFT ads that play, like, after midnight on A and E and on AM radio stations.

0:10:13 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah.

0:10:14 Unknown Speaker #3

Where you are really sweatily trying to convince everybody that this is a good investment.

0:10:18 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. I mean, I start out by screaming one centimeter away from the boom mic. This is not a pyramid scheme, and it peaks out People really are buying.

0:10:31 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, you would have some trouble at first because you weren't able to mint these. You had to cinnamon them?

0:10:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. So a lot of people know I was I circumvented the minting process and also the the the fees, the mining fees. Mhmm. And I sentiment Cineman.

0:10:48 Unknown Speaker #3

So smart. Cinnamon though.

0:10:50 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Because they they don't realize this. But, unfortunately, I did. It was it sentimenting takes way more energy than meant to

0:11:01 Unknown Speaker #5

form my Pinting it on a piece of paper. Yes.

0:11:04 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Oh, come on. Fuck the fucking environment. This is all so stupid. You know?

0:11:10 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Look,

0:11:12 Unknown Speaker #3

the big businesses are fucking the environment more than we are.

0:11:15 Unknown Speaker #1

It's not what we got.

0:11:16 Unknown Speaker #3

And when I read that when I read that there's more cows farted in the environment, than any human on earth other than me. And the the second highest producer of methane other than

0:11:24 Unknown Speaker #2

the Well, you have a car that runs on a farting cow. Is that right?

0:11:29 Unknown Speaker #5

I wish it was one farting cow.

0:11:31 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. It's a lot of well, I got in early on the the oil that you put in cars. The you

0:11:37 Unknown Speaker #4

know -- Biote.

0:11:38 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:11:39 Unknown Speaker #3

and then I convert I I love that so much. I got a second car converted into running on several farting cows. And so

0:11:46 Unknown Speaker #1

the the car had to be considerably bigger because, of course, the cows have to be close at all times.

0:11:50 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, here's what has to happen. Is you have to get cows that can walk sideways. Because what you do is it's like an l shape. The car is the angle and then the cow's butt has to be against the gas

0:12:01 Unknown Speaker #2

tank. Right.

0:12:02 Unknown Speaker #3

And so

0:12:02 Unknown Speaker #2

so the cows jump along with the car?

0:12:04 Unknown Speaker #4

And then jump it and fart

0:12:06 Unknown Speaker #2

it. Okay.

0:12:06 Unknown Speaker #3

And luckily, it terrifies them, so they're constantly farting because they go, you know. Well, I think and I've

0:12:12 Unknown Speaker #5

i've been telling you this, you need to make it like a motorcycle where they're sort of side saddle their side cow.

0:12:18 Unknown Speaker #4

what I

0:12:18 Unknown Speaker #2

You know

0:12:19 Unknown Speaker #2

mean? But it feels to me, your car, to me, feels like what it must have been to see the first steam engine. Go across the America.

0:12:28 Unknown Speaker #5

like Weaker electric cars already exist.

0:12:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Tear

0:12:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. So we've have election. I'll a Tesla go by and then I'll hear Mhmm. And I'm like, that's the future. Yeah. And here comes Todd, thirty five miles an hour max. Trying to merge onto the two ten.

0:12:43 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, it just makes so much more sense than ruining the earth to make gas. What we wanna do is feed one cow so much food

0:12:50 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:12:51 Unknown Speaker #5

that it makes gas.

0:12:51 Unknown Speaker #4

yes.

0:12:51 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:12:52 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. It's a it's a whole circle because I'm feeding the cow my grass, which I can't get rid of because I planted crap grass. And so then the cow farts, oh, by the way, I don't have to pay for a horn in the car because you just slap the cow's ass and it moves.

0:13:08 Unknown Speaker #4

That's and

0:13:09 Unknown Speaker #5

that's it. That's no. That saves you so much money.

0:13:12 Unknown Speaker #1

You got yes. You guys pay for your horns?

0:13:14 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, you got to I

0:13:15 Unknown Speaker #1

got a free horse.

0:13:16 Unknown Speaker #3

What what is your sound like?

0:13:17 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Your horn is stock. We can tell.

0:13:19 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. You have stock horn. No one respects to stock horn.

0:13:21 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. No. They're not gonna get out of your way.

0:13:23 Unknown Speaker #5

If you don't have an aftermarket horn, I don't better.

0:13:26 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh my god. If you are making the most amount of noise when you're going down the street, you get none of my respect. Oh. If you don't rev up by an outdoor cafe. In anything you're driving, go to hell. Go to hell. Yeah.

0:13:39 Unknown Speaker #4

That's so cool.

0:13:40 Unknown Speaker #5

I I am sometimes too relaxed at an outdoor cafe. Yes. I need good.

0:13:44 Unknown Speaker #3

You need to be scared into knowing that you could constantly be run over or

0:13:49 Unknown Speaker #5

or that there's a cool guy around?

0:13:50 Unknown Speaker #3

There's a cool guy around. Now here's what here's my question for you, Howard. Obviously, you got the weird horn. But what about headlights? Are you doing the brightest headlights in the business now?

0:14:02 Unknown Speaker #5

No. Yeah. Because I know I know we've all transferred to sun lights.

0:14:05 Unknown Speaker #1

No. I no. I

0:14:06 Unknown Speaker #3

oh, gotta do sun lights. Yeah.

0:14:08 Unknown Speaker #2

We have small -- isotopes of uranium in the front of our cars that give off a bright beam, ammunition. No.

0:14:15 Unknown Speaker #1

You guys are the problem on the road. Honestly, you guys are the reason for all the assistance I've had, honestly.

0:14:19 Unknown Speaker #3

You gotta take a spin in my Muosdah, and I'll take you and I think you'll be really excited with some of the a accoutrements I have

0:14:28 Unknown Speaker #4

on there.

0:14:28 Unknown Speaker #3

I'm sorry.

0:14:29 Unknown Speaker #2

I thought it was a Calvrolet. Was it a Calvrolet?

0:14:32 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, I don't buy America and it was a

0:14:35 Unknown Speaker #4

cow boy.

0:14:36 Unknown Speaker #5

That's a really good policy.

0:14:38 Unknown Speaker #3

It's not bad American.

0:14:40 Unknown Speaker #1

Wait. Which kind do Did you buy a a mousta?

0:14:43 Unknown Speaker #3

I have a mousta now. It was a Calvrolet.

0:14:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Did you look at Carrolas?

0:14:49 Unknown Speaker #2

Calrolas. Calrolas. Yeah.

0:14:49 Unknown Speaker #3

About which one?

0:14:52 Unknown Speaker #3

I looked at Carolus and they were nice. They'll they were sensible

0:14:55 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:14:55 Unknown Speaker #3

yeah. -- which is very nice. Right.

0:14:56 Unknown Speaker #4

But

0:14:57 Unknown Speaker #3

then I saw some guys looking under the hood of a Mooza in the supermarket a parking

0:15:00 Unknown Speaker #4

lot. Yeah.

0:15:01 Unknown Speaker #1

know, you also don't wanna be one of those guys that drive in a Calvrolet or not yeah.

0:15:01 Unknown Speaker #3

And, you

0:15:05 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, a Calvriolet? No. A Calvriolet with the with the top down?

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #2

my god. A cow vet. A cow vet.

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #1

I make Oh

0:15:11 Unknown Speaker #5

I'm really liking these f cow fifties. Have you seen these?

0:15:14 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, yes. Yes. Well, but nice.

0:15:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Not a lot storage in the cow, which is really nice on there.

0:15:21 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah.

0:15:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. What size

0:15:23 Unknown Speaker #5

trunk is in your cow?

0:15:25 Unknown Speaker #3

What else? Very good question. It's boot. It's a boot trunk. So it's basically just enough space for I've got the spare -- Mhmm. -- hoof in there. No. And then Do

0:15:39 Unknown Speaker #5

you have a spare tire anymore? There's no room that.

0:15:41 Unknown Speaker #3

No room. Yeah. Which is too bad because I'm going flat a

0:15:44 Unknown Speaker #4

lot. So

0:15:45 Unknown Speaker #1

heavy heavy car.

0:15:47 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. But I have triple a at earth. Triple butter.

0:15:51 Unknown Speaker #2

Poor fun. Does that work?

0:15:53 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. And then what else? I'm just really quick before on. There's Nissan or something like that. Yeah.

0:16:01 Unknown Speaker #1

I was thinking like something here.

0:16:03 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. I was thinking like, I don't have it.

0:16:03 Unknown Speaker #6

Mhmm.

0:16:07 Unknown Speaker #1

I mean, you could maybe go with, like, a Ford,

0:16:13 Unknown Speaker #3

food. We always set up

0:16:14 Unknown Speaker #2

what we got what what we have to start with cow

0:16:17 Unknown Speaker #1

or Mitsmubishi, maybe? Mitsmubishi.

0:16:19 Unknown Speaker #2

Is there another root word, though, that from cow or moo -- cattle? -- cattle.

0:16:24 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:16:24 Unknown Speaker #2

cattle, cattle, effort. Heafers good. So hefferle. Hefferle is even

0:16:30 Unknown Speaker #5

closer to

0:16:31 Unknown Speaker #4

this couch.

0:16:31 Unknown Speaker #3

So yeah. I didn't have a hefferle. Heparlay.

0:16:34 Unknown Speaker #1

It's actually heparlay. Heparlay.

0:16:36 Unknown Speaker #3

But when when this gym is

0:16:36 Unknown Speaker #4

That's right.

0:16:40 Unknown Speaker #5

gotta get back to the gym. Yeah.

0:16:40 Unknown Speaker #2

yes. We

0:16:41 Unknown Speaker #3

We bought that the gym -- Yeah.

0:16:43 Unknown Speaker #3

because we saw that they're you can tell by the deals the gym is doing that they're about to go under.

0:16:43 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:16:49 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes.

0:16:50 Unknown Speaker #3

And they had gotten to the point where bring anyone that is a blood relative or married into your family can come with you to the gym for five dollars each.

0:16:58 Unknown Speaker #1

It I'm not gonna say that this this that that we're doing this just You can tell. You can tell her besides dollars a year.

0:17:09 Unknown Speaker #5

It's how dumb smart it

0:17:12 Unknown Speaker #2

does. Like, we're always on the lookout. Is this five dollars a year? So they were

0:17:17 Unknown Speaker #4

her kid. Her kid.

0:17:19 Unknown Speaker #5

I think they were upside down in the real estate or something because five dollars a year. I mean, that what's that? Five cents a day.

0:17:26 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, they had the guy who solved inflation in the seventies come in. I forget his name. But he took it down to five dollars a year, and he's like, we're gonna be hurting for a while. Right. But this is gonna correct.

0:17:38 Unknown Speaker #5

And we're gonna we're gonna hike the interest switches on it. Oh, he put

0:17:41 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah. It it was twenty five percent just to use the five pound dumbbells.

0:17:46 Unknown Speaker #5

Wow.

0:17:46 Unknown Speaker #2

Wow. So, yeah, he really whipped it into shape, but it it just eventually you know, choked it out.

0:17:51 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, at the end of the big short, they have that thing where it's like we asked the guy that this movie was based on what he's invest where he's shorting in the future. Yeah. And he said water. Mhmm. And then after the crisis, I'd also the gym on thirteenth.

0:18:06 Unknown Speaker #5

And hey, he made close to a billion dollars shorting

0:18:09 Unknown Speaker #2

oh, yeah. On the stock on stock credits, Stonks, Reddit -- Yes.

0:18:14 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:18:14 Unknown Speaker #2

was people were shorting the hell out of this gym. And actually, Comcast and AT and T tried to come in and buy it, A bunch of companies, we're looking to just graph it on.

0:18:24 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. But we swooped in because, you know and and a lot of people are gonna say, this is some sort of, like, superficial attempt to show the school that we are actually working on ourselves, quote or quote Well, we stepped away. Yeah. But we stepped away. This isn't about sort of sort of performing a growth for the school or anything about like that. This is about finding something else to better ourselves out side of the thing we've done forever. Right? And we've all taken a real shine to to this gym. We have had a blast over the last few months. Sort of all finding our sort of little niche.

0:18:56 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, a lot of people thought we were gonna come in and clean house. A lot of these companies, these investors, they come in, they buy a company, they absolutely just devastated

0:19:04 Unknown Speaker #5

the word for this.

0:19:06 Unknown Speaker #2

No. We did not. We fired what was it? Eighty out of eighty five people. Yeah. And we just took it easy. We'll take

0:19:13 Unknown Speaker #3

it easy because you gotta keep the main core of people there. So we walked in and pretty unceremoniously fired ADP we end up calling.

0:19:21 Unknown Speaker #2

We were in person, but we did we sent out an email in person.

0:19:25 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, you don't wanna make it all personal. You know what I mean? You just wanna let them know. It's business, eighty of you are getting canned. That's what said in the email. And then but everybody

0:19:33 Unknown Speaker #2

you you punch it up to chicken.

0:19:34 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. But everybody

0:19:35 Unknown Speaker #5

gets everybody also gets when they leave a shit can, which is a can that we have all taken this shit in so that they feel better.

0:19:45 Unknown Speaker #2

We didn't want him to leave empty handed.

0:19:47 Unknown Speaker #4

We don't.

0:19:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, before we did, we weren't planning on canning them, but they tried to unionize. And so we went in there and we were like, okay, this isn't gonna work for us.

0:19:55 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Right.

0:19:56 Unknown Speaker #3

go. Take your shit can. Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out, which we're gonna try to do as every person works out of it says, right on your butt.

0:19:56 Unknown Speaker #4

Here you

0:20:03 Unknown Speaker #5

And just in case you didn't get it, the trash can is for shit.

0:20:07 Unknown Speaker #2

And somehow, we still miss. We never hit anybody

0:20:10 Unknown Speaker #3

to the door on the way in. Well, you you see that while scooting out of the door as we tried to sleep.

0:20:14 Unknown Speaker #5

My question was where were these people taking shits? Did you guys notice our whole staff freaking stunk? They all stunk. They were

0:20:22 Unknown Speaker #2

full up with it.

0:20:23 Unknown Speaker #5

I didn't know if they knew how to poop.

0:20:24 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, some people put signs up that say under knee management. We say the staff doesn't stink anymore. That's what we put up

0:20:30 Unknown Speaker #4

outside the gym.

0:20:31 Unknown Speaker #5

Because we all know what you actually wanna hear.

0:20:33 Unknown Speaker #4

You

0:20:33 Unknown Speaker #5

know what I mean? Nobody cares about new management is the problem solved.

0:20:37 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yeah. So we fired the stinkers. We kept five people, and they're all kind of front of house

0:20:43 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah.

0:20:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Hot, sexy men and women because, you you know, that's something you can't replace. We can do some of the

0:20:50 Unknown Speaker #5

other stuff. You can't teach that.

0:20:51 Unknown Speaker #3

But you need these front of house. I mean, the bodies on these guys.

0:20:54 Unknown Speaker #6

Because

0:20:54 Unknown Speaker #2

we're selling a lifestyle. Yes. You know? Yeah.

0:20:57 Unknown Speaker #1

I mean, not and we're we're self aware. We know you look at us and you don't think, wow. I wanna look like those four guys. You know? Yeah.

0:21:03 Unknown Speaker #5

Not yet. Not yet.

0:21:05 Unknown Speaker #1

We're on our way to get there, but but we just wanted to make sure that people walk in and they're like,

0:21:09 Unknown Speaker #2

oh, this is the kind of

0:21:10 Unknown Speaker #1

place where I can make progress. I'm not gonna be stuck in the sort of ruts that I found myself in for the last forty years of my life. You know? That because a lot of people say that that

0:21:19 Unknown Speaker #2

sounds like you were talking about yourself there for

0:21:21 Unknown Speaker #1

a quick second. As well.

0:21:23 Unknown Speaker #5

We just understand that everybody's on a journey. Yes.

0:21:25 Unknown Speaker #1

You know what I mean? Yeah. A journey. And we're on day one of our journey. We're or actually two months ago.

0:21:30 Unknown Speaker #5

That's why we all posted

0:21:31 Unknown Speaker #1

our one for two months,

0:21:32 Unknown Speaker #5

We all posted our before photos

0:21:32 Unknown Speaker #2

full months.

0:21:34 Unknown Speaker #5

right when you walk in, and we are working towards our after photos.

0:21:34 Unknown Speaker #4

yeah.

0:21:34 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:21:39 Unknown Speaker #2

We have a sort of a pick, not available icon, like next to what our after will be. Yeah. But they're coming.

0:21:48 Unknown Speaker #3

That's what we do if you join our gym by the way, which you should. You'll get you'll have a before and after.

0:21:52 Unknown Speaker #1

New digit.

0:21:53 Unknown Speaker #3

And as time management Manage it's mandatory.

0:21:56 Unknown Speaker #2

and afters

0:21:56 Unknown Speaker #4

We'll do

0:21:56 Unknown Speaker #3

it before

0:21:57 Unknown Speaker #1

with time and digital.

0:21:58 Unknown Speaker #3

After a month at a time, you're trying to avoid the roast wall. So as as the months go on, we take a picture and you you may end up on the roast wall, which is like if you're after isn't a lot of

0:22:09 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:22:10 Unknown Speaker #3

right. -- successful gains and you know we're talking about nice body tightened up a little less ugly. You're fine. Then you're on the road wall. And you're fired from the

0:22:18 Unknown Speaker #5

you get fired from the gym if you don't make that progress.

0:22:21 Unknown Speaker #2

We're pooping in a bucket. It's ready for you. I won't be ready to slam the door.

0:22:24 Unknown Speaker #3

And just don't let the door your ass on the way out.

0:22:26 Unknown Speaker #5

It will be trying to.

0:22:28 Unknown Speaker #2

But that's we're not this mean. We just know we have a boot camp mentality now.

0:22:32 Unknown Speaker #1

And and and we also not we're not above being put on the roast wall. As now, I have been on the roast wall since the day. The gym reopened. Yes. And and, you know, I'm okay with it.

0:22:45 Unknown Speaker #2

You're alright

0:22:46 Unknown Speaker #4

Uh-huh.

0:22:46 Unknown Speaker #1

with it.

0:22:46 Unknown Speaker #2

And what part of the gym let the audience in on what part of the gym you are handling.

0:22:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, recently It should. Should. I've I've been trying to focus mostly on sort of calming, centering, sort of breathing,

0:23:01 Unknown Speaker #2

so less of the physical and more of the mental,

0:23:04 Unknown Speaker #1

and sort of being in touch with myself because a lot of people who have listened to the podcast probably know that I'm I have a lot of sort of shame about myself and and and everything. And so

0:23:04 Unknown Speaker #4

And and and and

0:23:04 Unknown Speaker #5

breath work.

0:23:18 Unknown Speaker #5

we're almost a living example. I mean, you're basically set up to rare.

0:23:23 Unknown Speaker #2

You're the human body and embodiment shame -- Wow.

0:23:26 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:23:26 Unknown Speaker #2

is what You're kind of a concentrate.

0:23:28 Unknown Speaker #5

You can

0:23:29 Unknown Speaker #4

sort of have, like, a

0:23:30 Unknown Speaker #5

shaver in a terrarium setup. Where you live in there and

0:23:34 Unknown Speaker #2

i I mean,

0:23:35 Unknown Speaker #4

you don't even have to say

0:23:36 Unknown Speaker #5

sort of.

0:23:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Well well

0:23:38 Unknown Speaker #3

let's let's cut the sort of on that.

0:23:41 Unknown Speaker #5

Let's explain what your job at the gym really is.

0:23:44 Unknown Speaker #4

They're an exam We were

0:23:45 Unknown Speaker #2

we were open to this.

0:23:47 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, because here's the thing.

0:23:48 Unknown Speaker #2

Really understand it. We were like, so you have at terrarium in the center that you live in.

0:23:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, it was, of course, the racquetball gym that nobody was using. So instead of having racquetball, they already have the windows.

0:23:57 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, we had to make cuts, obviously, so we could get away like, it was hemorrhaging money five dollars a year. Yeah.

0:24:03 Unknown Speaker #2

So we don't need the racquet ball

0:24:03 Unknown Speaker #3

Sorry.

0:24:05 Unknown Speaker #3

ball. Hey, guys, from the seventies. Sorry. Racket balls out.

0:24:08 Unknown Speaker #2

And most of the people playing more, you know, old -- Ugly. -- ugly.

0:24:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. So we didn't need anymore. So, yeah,

0:24:15 Unknown Speaker #4

i We're

0:24:15 Unknown Speaker #5

looking for basketball players. We're looking for people who are interested in watching a movie spider.

0:24:19 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, I am living in in in the wreck of Wall Court. We have sort of added some some astroturf and a sort of it it is.

0:24:28 Unknown Speaker #2

And of people are saying this, why are we talking about this episode one? The fact this is the this one was the one of the wildest points of your this reality. How could it get any crazy?

0:24:38 Unknown Speaker #5

We're trained like an animal. We're trained like an animal. You're doing spider

0:24:41 Unknown Speaker #5

And and and it's cutting you.

0:24:41 Unknown Speaker #4

walk.

0:24:43 Unknown Speaker #4

It's And

0:24:43 Unknown Speaker #1

and the reason I even wanted

0:24:45 Unknown Speaker #2

to do this in the

0:24:46 Unknown Speaker #4

first place.

0:24:47 Unknown Speaker #1

The reason I wanted to do this in the first place is because if you live your life on display, there is no opportunity for being self conscious anymore. I I'm putting myself out there -- Yes.

0:24:58 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:24:58 Unknown Speaker #1

so that I I I wake up every day knowing that everyone will know every single thing about me that happens to me, twenty four seven LiveStream, you can watch it. If you can't make it to the gym, there's a link, HowardStream, dot com. Yeah.

0:25:15 Unknown Speaker #2

How does your life change if you're under constant surveillance or if anybody could tune in at any time? What who are you as person if somebody's constantly wanting And

0:25:24 Unknown Speaker #5

what's beautiful to see that we haven't all arrived? We're on our journey. This is part of your health journey.

0:25:29 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. It's kind of a mental experience for you because

0:25:33 Unknown Speaker #1

yes. -- human beings. Everybody kind of thing where he he challenges the the the the human body and the human spirit

0:25:33 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:25:39 Unknown Speaker #4

and

0:25:40 Unknown Speaker #1

spirit with his quote unquote tricks.

0:25:42 Unknown Speaker #2

And this is and you're calling it

0:25:44 Unknown Speaker #5

we're not sure if they're tricks.

0:25:45 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. You're calling it twenty or twenty four days with no price. Obviously?

0:25:50 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes.

0:25:50 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:25:50 Unknown Speaker #2

It's what you're calling.

0:25:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Very quippy, very easy. It's great on a flyer.

0:25:54 Unknown Speaker #1

Twenty four days with no privacy with Howard Levis. A lot of people say the two with are a little clunky. And I say, I'm sorry.

0:25:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Four days.

0:26:01 Unknown Speaker #2

It's kind of like the guy who ate McDonald's for twenty years.

0:26:05 Unknown Speaker #1

It's very much like too long. Precise. Yes.

0:26:08 Unknown Speaker #2

No. I'm not talking

0:26:08 Unknown Speaker #3

about super science.

0:26:10 Unknown Speaker #4

You're talking about time.

0:26:13 Unknown Speaker #2

Because he beat you feed him to that idea by Seventeen

0:26:16 Unknown Speaker #4

years? Yeah. Right. You were

0:26:17 Unknown Speaker #2

at McDonald's every meal for twenty for seventeen years before

0:26:20 Unknown Speaker #5

wait. Did you stop?

0:26:21 Unknown Speaker #3

You're at McDonald's? Yeah. Well

0:26:23 Unknown Speaker #4

probably had well,

0:26:24 Unknown Speaker #2

it's so weird.

0:26:25 Unknown Speaker #3

By choice. I'm ordering McDonald's now.

0:26:27 Unknown Speaker #2

It's so weird. Todd had eaten so many McDonald's. He had turned into a quarter pounder with cheese. And that guy ate him.

0:26:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Morgan, the last episode is Morgan Spurlock taking a bite out of me and puking.

0:26:39 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, good for him and you both.

0:26:40 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Well, you know, we well, we'll see. I've I've seen no residuals on that document. So we'll see.

0:26:46 Unknown Speaker #5

What's now?

0:26:47 Unknown Speaker #1

I do wanna say to everybody out there,

0:26:49 Unknown Speaker #2

you know, it's hard receiving no residual. What?

0:26:53 Unknown Speaker #5

no it's I'm on your side. No.

0:26:53 Unknown Speaker #4

It's

0:26:54 Unknown Speaker #4

I know. I know.

0:26:55 Unknown Speaker #3

to you.

0:26:55 Unknown Speaker #5

It's unfortunate

0:26:56 Unknown Speaker #2

What I mean, excited about this because this is a real feat.

0:26:59 Unknown Speaker #1

And and it is it is not just a Levis only. If if other people wanna participate, we did convert two of the other racquetball courts in the terrariums that you can rent

0:27:08 Unknown Speaker #3

for -- Yeah.

0:27:09 Unknown Speaker #1

We have. -- weeks or months at a time if you'd like to.

0:27:11 Unknown Speaker #5

We have the rock. We have the rock.

0:27:12 Unknown Speaker #3

There's nothing rock spider

0:27:14 Unknown Speaker #1

man is here. We have them all. You can do it if you want, and and participate in this in this sort of mental wellness experiment that I -- Right. -- I'm participating.

0:27:22 Unknown Speaker #5

And what would you say you've learned so far in there?

0:27:25 Unknown Speaker #1

You know, I still think I'm in the adjustment process where my mind has it sort of

0:27:29 Unknown Speaker #2

you're a little wide Yeah. I, you know I

0:27:31 Unknown Speaker #3

will figure out how to get out the fluorescent, like, racquetball lights and get something a little better for you. No.

0:27:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Hey. And, you know, I don't even want that. I want I want I'm perfectly bummed. Okay.

0:27:41 Unknown Speaker #2

Alright. Well, then we won't do that. I

0:27:44 Unknown Speaker #1

i'm just saying, I'm rolling with the punches here because that what this is all about. Right.

0:27:48 Unknown Speaker #2

That's about me.

0:27:49 Unknown Speaker #1

It's possible with the life I've been given in the person that I am -- Mhmm.

0:27:52 Unknown Speaker #1

and just sort of living living in my own

0:27:52 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:27:55 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah. Do I need privacy?

0:27:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, this is sort of a question we ask. You think that you can't get any better? What if you gave it a month? What if you gave it a month of working hard? And if that doesn't work, you're fired, and we never wanna see you again.

0:28:10 Unknown Speaker #5

But take the month.

0:28:10 Unknown Speaker #4

Right.

0:28:12 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. You

0:28:12 Unknown Speaker #5

know, for example, I'm a trainer, and I am a one on one trainer for anybody who wants to come in. Am I in shape yet? Not at all.

0:28:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. No.

0:28:22 Unknown Speaker #5

I can't even do the exercises that I'm asking people to do as an example. So they have to come in with pretty good knowledge. But I'm gonna get there.

0:28:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Absolutely. Because we're all helping you study for your trainer's exam.

0:28:34 Unknown Speaker #5

You're all sending me YouTube links. You're all sending me those pictures of old guys. Who just did little tiny weights, but they do about a thousand reps and get really buff.

0:28:34 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:28:44 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. I mean, you do have the singlet the leather balls, all of the sort of nineteen forties workout equipment. They look hairballs. The little jiggle jiggle belt

0:28:54 Unknown Speaker #3

oh, you're you're constantly on that jiggle button. Your skin looks very loose.

0:28:58 Unknown Speaker #5

It it I think the loosest my skin's ever been. And I'm really proud of it. My stomach hasn't changed in size, but the underneath is disconnected from the outside, which is really feels good.

0:29:08 Unknown Speaker #2

So it shook a it shook your skin away from your body kind of.

0:29:11 Unknown Speaker #5

Kind of.

0:29:12 Unknown Speaker #2

And dropped it to the ground.

0:29:13 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. Kind of. What's that like?

0:29:15 Unknown Speaker #3

I I can't think of anyone that people would be luckier to be motivated by. Mhmm. I mean, the creator of the big nightmare. The inventor of the baseball haunted massage. Yeah. The the the the man who is

0:29:30 Unknown Speaker #4

blue up the Lou. Who

0:29:31 Unknown Speaker #3

blew up the Lou?

0:29:32 Unknown Speaker #5

I really appreciate these.

0:29:33 Unknown Speaker #3

You you are a man who can motivate people to their darkest most intense cells.

0:29:41 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right.

0:29:41 Unknown Speaker #3

And they express those and they work them out and and I'm real I've really enjoyed watching you train people.

0:29:46 Unknown Speaker #5

And you do have

0:29:47 Unknown Speaker #1

you have sort of taken on a few clients already. Right? Your your schedule is surprisingly booked

0:29:52 Unknown Speaker #5

it's really booked. Yeah. Absolutely. Who do I have this afternoon? I got Lufarigno this afternoon, then I

0:29:59 Unknown Speaker #3

a walk himself.

0:30:00 Unknown Speaker #5

That's a big one.

0:30:01 Unknown Speaker #2

So the scare tactics videos you've been airing around town

0:30:05 Unknown Speaker #5

yeah. Lofer Igno has gotten too calm, and that's his admission. He says, I don't have the rage I used to. Because that's what working out really is. Do you really wanna get that bench press up?

0:30:14 Unknown Speaker #3

Right.

0:30:14 Unknown Speaker #5

You need to get your anger up.

0:30:16 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. I saw your commercials, like, do you have strained relationships with your family.

0:30:19 Unknown Speaker #4

Mhmm.

0:30:20 Unknown Speaker #2

Are you worried you're not enough? Mhmm. Are you worried you're gonna are you worried you're gonna get in a car accident?

0:30:28 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Do you see a red light and wanna go?

0:30:30 Unknown Speaker #1

And then after those questions, it says tune in to the next commercial break for more of this commercial because you never got the answer.

0:30:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Pose questions and unfortunately.

0:30:38 Unknown Speaker #5

Confuse you. Are you upset when you see the inside of a library? Yes. What is the funeral for?

0:30:46 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. So many questions.

0:30:48 Unknown Speaker #2

Why are we going? Yeah. I mean,

0:30:48 Unknown Speaker #5

Like, really dead.

0:30:49 Unknown Speaker #5

at the

0:30:53 Unknown Speaker #3

very and What communal four gave me so much pause? Yeah. If I well,

0:30:57 Unknown Speaker #4

i was in the midst

0:31:02 Unknown Speaker #2

of a funeral.

0:31:03 Unknown Speaker #5

Mhmm.

0:31:03 Unknown Speaker #2

And I walked away.

0:31:04 Unknown Speaker #4

Mhmm. Yeah.

0:31:05 Unknown Speaker #5

So thank you for watching.

0:31:06 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, it's good you walked away because you were watching those commercials very low.

0:31:11 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, they were, like, silence your phones. And I was, like, I'm not getting a call, but I am watching full volume Yeah.

0:31:16 Unknown Speaker #4

I'm gonna silence my phone, but

0:31:17 Unknown Speaker #5

i'm not gonna silence my AirPods, but then, of course, they don't connect your phones playing Yes.

0:31:21 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. So I tumped the casket over and I rolled. But eventually, in part four of your commercial, you say try my training session.

0:31:29 Unknown Speaker #5

Trilight training session. Come exercise. You'll get a great deal. First training session is free. The other ten are mandatory.

0:31:37 Unknown Speaker #2

So the first training session is free. The other tenor mandatory. But the first one's free, and then you just hound the people that come to the gym. Yes. And make them feel terrible that they haven't taken you on. And you feel make them feel guilty about the first session they took?

0:31:50 Unknown Speaker #5

Absolutely. Well, everybody's got anger inside, and I find that really comes out where

0:31:54 Unknown Speaker #1

the -- Right.

0:31:55 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:31:55 Unknown Speaker #5

mirror around me, it really comes out.

0:31:57 Unknown Speaker #2

So people are ducking off trying to avoid your eye contact.

0:32:00 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, that's that's the super platinum plan. Right. You come to the gym and just try to avoid me, but I'll chase you the whole time. And that is a good workout. Right. Because we added a lot of stairs.

0:32:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. You have a

0:32:11 Unknown Speaker #5

lot of stairs to the gym. You can't just have a ground floor.

0:32:13 Unknown Speaker #2

And a lot of people just not trying to talk to you and they get they get so sweaty.

0:32:17 Unknown Speaker #5

It's the workout you could get is is is running away from an annoying guy. Yeah.

0:32:21 Unknown Speaker #3

You know, I think gets my heart rate higher than running into you at a party.

0:32:26 Unknown Speaker #5

I know. I know. A lot of people have said that. A lot of people have said, like, will you train me and buy and buy that? I just mean come up and talk to

0:32:33 Unknown Speaker #3

me. Right. Yeah.

0:32:34 Unknown Speaker #2

And Sort of I remember getting absolutely ripped during a monotonous conversation with you at a party. And I've I've never looked better than that. I I would go I would sit through you talking about

0:32:49 Unknown Speaker #5

well, it's emotional confusion.

0:32:50 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Yes.

0:32:51 Unknown Speaker #5

start talking about one thing that I immediately change subject wildly I don't care at all if you're with me in the conversation. Right?

0:32:51 Unknown Speaker #1

I I

0:32:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Even you're talking now, my abs are tightening up my core because I'm so anxious. I'm like, holding my whole body tight. I'm not breathing very nicely. Right. Right. My body thinks I am in flight. Right. And so it's burning calories.

0:33:09 Unknown Speaker #5

Right. That's not because of me. You understand what I'm saying? That isn't

0:33:13 Unknown Speaker #3

me. Totally.

0:33:14 Unknown Speaker #5

That's a good thing.

0:33:15 Unknown Speaker #1

Jeez. I'm sweating.

0:33:16 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. I need to take I need to take a little jittery here. Yeah.

0:33:20 Unknown Speaker #1

I think I'm ready to take a break.

0:33:21 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Listening

0:33:23 Unknown Speaker #2

to you talk about hobbies you started during the pandemic absolutely gets me shredded.

0:33:29 Unknown Speaker #5

Have I told you about me making banana, Brett? I can't figure out the leavener. Okay. How do you get it?

0:33:35 Unknown Speaker #2

I need a hand towel. I'm sweating profuse it.

0:33:38 Unknown Speaker #3

I keep telling you every time you bring it up I've got all the rotten bananas you need covered in the white place.

0:33:42 Unknown Speaker #5

I know. But I don't want they're just not as rotten as I like them. If I'm being fully

0:33:47 Unknown Speaker #6

honest, I'd

0:33:48 Unknown Speaker #5

like to get them full and then they put it in the freezer.

0:33:50 Unknown Speaker #2

But we're thinking I just made another one.

0:33:52 Unknown Speaker #3

Now what I know it's watery but so there's is this kale and So ice cream?

0:33:58 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. That's kale juice. Ice cream juice. Kale juice. Well, kale juice. Well, kale milk because you can milk anything. I got a milking machine.

0:34:09 Unknown Speaker #3

I have your check. Could milk me.

0:34:13 Unknown Speaker #2

God. That was good. And we got that playing at all times here

0:34:17 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, yeah. Gee, we got Meet The Fucks playing here.

0:34:17 Unknown Speaker #4

at the morning.

0:34:25 Unknown Speaker #5

Now meet the parents.

0:34:26 Unknown Speaker #6

Meet the fucking

0:34:26 Unknown Speaker #4

i love that story and meet the fuck. Yeah. It's

0:34:28 Unknown Speaker #2

we got it play it all the time. And we actually filmed our own deleted scene where the nipples get milled.

0:34:40 Unknown Speaker #5

The nipples get milked.

0:34:41 Unknown Speaker #2

De Niro gets his nipples milk.

0:34:43 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, dear. Niro, a huge wing.

0:34:45 Unknown Speaker #2

All the fuckers. Huge wink.

0:34:47 Unknown Speaker #5

Huge wink to me. It's Sam.

0:34:50 Unknown Speaker #2

Sam just is there. It's Mill by

0:34:53 Unknown Speaker #5

all the fuckers. From the wrong movie. I accidentally I accidentally came in, dressed as him from the media.

0:35:00 Unknown Speaker #2

It's a twenty minute long scene where Samris Nero gets fully milked weatherfuckers.

0:35:06 Unknown Speaker #1

The fox.

0:35:07 Unknown Speaker #2

Not the fuckers. The fox. All the fucks go, what is that? He bleeds him dry,

0:35:12 Unknown Speaker #5

if milk it's it's not meat the fuckers, it's milked by fuckers.

0:35:16 Unknown Speaker #3

It's milked by fuckers.

0:35:18 Unknown Speaker #5

And we're out to production companies who are interested in buying this for some sort of short form content as well.

0:35:26 Unknown Speaker #2

Five hookers is get is it it was on the

0:35:31 Unknown Speaker #5

these are the jumbo tron.

0:35:32 Unknown Speaker #4

It was we hyper

0:35:35 Unknown Speaker #2

we circumvented the kiss cam and played the milk and players.

0:35:41 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, I think And my theory, a lot of people got pregnant then.

0:35:44 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. The Hamilton mosquitoes were playing. The minorly face mask. The minor the minorly face mask. I can't believe

0:35:57 Unknown Speaker #1

we haven't talked about the hills of mosquitoes

0:36:01 Unknown Speaker #2

well, I mean, they were yeah. They were striking for so long. Yeah. They're finally back.

0:36:06 Unknown Speaker #3

And they're up against the Bellfield areas?

0:36:08 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I but we circumvented the kiss cam, and we got milked by fuckers.

0:36:16 Unknown Speaker #3

That was a jumbo truck.

0:36:18 Unknown Speaker #5

I mean, I think, it's safe to say, we have a lot of new stuff going on.

0:36:21 Unknown Speaker #5

And if you really wanna see it, it's hard to describe. You just gotta come down to the gym, and sign up.

0:36:21 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:36:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. You got to. And like, you know, you can come by. I'm at the smoothie making station slash supplement bar.

0:36:37 Unknown Speaker #4

Mhmm.

0:36:38 Unknown Speaker #2

And I do have a milking machine, but I've yet to, you know, sort of create a house You want a house cocktail or a house drink

0:36:46 Unknown Speaker #1

or a house water. You can only get from us.

0:36:49 Unknown Speaker #5

You've been messing with alcoholic chunks at the gym.

0:36:52 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, I've got a pea protein vodka, a chalk shot. Awesome. That will get you absolutely fucked up and get your muscles what they need. Wow. Yeah. But but, yeah, it is a it's it is a It has a sports bar feel to it sometimes, which I think I need to back off on the

0:37:13 Unknown Speaker #4

mhmm.

0:37:13 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:37:13 Unknown Speaker #2

on the Jello shots, and the shooters, and the the beakers and the and the plugs and everything I'm serving there. But, yeah, want it to be fun. I want it to be like a hangout area. Yeah. But I am making two day old sandwiches in cellophane that people are loving. That's great. Everybody got this.

0:37:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Just so hungry after a workout that you need the first thing you walk by.

0:37:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, I get all my best ideas from food at the air port. And I And not just food ideas. No. I'll I'll book a a little a little flight to, you know, Arizona, but I'll just show up to, like, get ideas from the airport. Like, oh, just just Chinese in the terminal? Great idea.

0:37:57 Unknown Speaker #3

Eight AM. Eight AM? Yeah. Why would anyone want breakfast right now? Right.

0:38:02 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Across the threshold, seventy dollar water, Dad, I love

0:38:06 Unknown Speaker #3

i've seen you just walking by and tapping the breads at the wolfgang puck's just trying to figure out the exact stillness of

0:38:13 Unknown Speaker #6

it. Yes.

0:38:15 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So but so far it's going yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

0:38:19 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

0:38:20 Unknown Speaker #2

I'll tap. I'll tap.

0:38:24 Unknown Speaker #1

And you're for for for produce, for for bananas, apples, all that kind

0:38:28 Unknown Speaker #2

of stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

0:38:28 Unknown Speaker #1

You're not doing the they have those, like, imperfect produce or whatever. You're doing the the version of imperfect that's the next step. Right? Yes. It's Never receptible?

0:38:41 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. Never acceptable. Never acceptable produce. Sort of like a need to study need to study produce. So it's it's very heavily basically, GMOs have started creating new things. And one of them is it looks like when you shake a pencil and it looks like it's kinda doing like a it's basically a banana that moves. Oh, my. Which I am serving. Mhmm. What and yeah. So it's GMolis is what I have there.

0:39:19 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Only oh, so everything's

0:39:22 Unknown Speaker #2

genetically modified only. Only. Is is what's in my little basket

0:39:25 Unknown Speaker #4

right now.

0:39:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Because the I mean, these foods are going to waste. You know, these sort of, like, new new apples and

0:39:34 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:39:35 Unknown Speaker #2

mhmm. -- it's the same process that you get like a honey crisp Apple where they bring

0:39:39 Unknown Speaker #5

to evolution.

0:39:40 Unknown Speaker #2

Together. So they'll bring, like, you know, a piece of iron and a mango, and it's kind of one thing.

0:39:48 Unknown Speaker #5

Mhmm.

0:39:49 Unknown Speaker #2

Mhmm. And and it's not edible yet, but we're working on it.

0:39:53 Unknown Speaker #3

Bill, I I I also wanna point out that you've been spending a lot of time at the airport. Just kind of I I feel like you're lonely maybe ever since the breakup. You had such a nice relationship going. And it seems like you're you're you know, you say it's about food, but I think you're trying to, like, meet people in distress or something like

0:40:13 Unknown Speaker #2

that. Yeah. Yeah. I have been going to the airport. I just find it very romantic there. Sort of people saying their goodbyes. You know, it's the same concept as, like, funerals or weddings or or or other places where emotions are heightened.

0:40:29 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Right when someone says they're goodbye, you're swooping right in there and like, Hey, I'm still here.

0:40:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Exactly. So I look for goodbyes out near the, you know, two a through see departures area, and I'll tell these people. Sure.

0:40:49 Unknown Speaker #5

What camera?

0:40:50 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And and very respectful, but I'll tell some people that look like there may be like, oh, this long distance ain't gonna work out. And I'll, you know, I'll cry eating a bag of dried vegetables.

0:41:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Classic airport snacks.

0:41:11 Unknown Speaker #5

Classic. Well, I see that. I gotta walk up to that person and help them offer

0:41:15 Unknown Speaker #1

them all. Are you okay? Yeah. What's going on? Can I help you?

0:41:18 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I've had a lot of success here. I mean, I flew to Albuquerque,

0:41:25 Unknown Speaker #4

that is successful. Yeah. Congrats.

0:41:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. I stowed away in a dog crate to out Turkey. Froze slap to death. Almost froze slap to death in that. But I bring my own oxygen

0:41:40 Unknown Speaker #2

mhmm. -- because, you know, there's no much oxygen once you get up to thirty thousand.

0:41:40 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:41:44 Unknown Speaker #3

Did you find companionship in Albuquerque or did someone think you were their dog for a few weeks?

0:41:50 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Yes. Well, What's k nine companionship actually really mimics.

0:41:58 Unknown Speaker #2

So if somebody thinks you are their dog, eventually, you can cut the ruse and be like, you can stand up from the bowl and be like, I'm actually a man, and I noticed you've been having some trouble in your relationship. And usually, they scream. They run outside. They're like, how did I not notice? Now that I looked at -- Right.

0:41:58 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah.

0:42:17 Unknown Speaker #5

Right.

0:42:17 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:42:17 Unknown Speaker #2

disguise was terrible.

0:42:20 Unknown Speaker #1

Where's my dog?

0:42:21 Unknown Speaker #2

Where's my dog? What after the dog?

0:42:24 Unknown Speaker #3

I have to call letterman and tell him we lied on stupid pet tricks. I'm a human at her though.

0:42:30 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh my god. I went to so many talk shows.

0:42:35 Unknown Speaker #3

Caesar Milan, trained you.

0:42:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Caesar Milan beat the shit out of me for two weeks. So Yes. Yes. He was breaking me. He would try to break me because I kept, like, biting the mail unless it came out of the spot. Right. Right. I would rip apart some pre sorted

0:42:50 Unknown Speaker #3

dogs are supposed to hit the mailman

0:42:52 Unknown Speaker #4

after that.

0:42:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Why you have my wires crossed? Yeah. I would hate the mail, not the mail, man.

0:43:00 Unknown Speaker #3

I hate the mail, not the mailman.

0:43:01 Unknown Speaker #2

Let the I would let the the Hydrant pee on me. I was messed up there for a while. But I'm gonna get it figured out. I think I'm I'm less into finding love now or just letting love come to me at the smoothie bar. Hopefully.

0:43:16 Unknown Speaker #1

It's a great place because the part like like, you know, a lot of people, you know, they wanna flirt with the bartender, Yes. You're you're kind of taking that approach now where you're kinda playing it cool, sorta leaning back instead of leaning forward.

0:43:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Exactly. And Todd is doing a great job of getting most of the town in front of us. He's really doing a good job here at the gym with but I don't wanna say exactly what you do.

0:43:39 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, yeah. I I I'm I've used my performance, let's just say experience. Uh-huh. And Yeah.

0:43:47 Unknown Speaker #1

Let's just say that. I

0:43:48 Unknown Speaker #3

think that's an alright word for the situation to kind of put out advertisement and let people know about the gym through my ideas of good advertising that I think I've learned through Gorilla Theatre

0:44:00 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:44:01 Unknown Speaker #3

and through Macau Macak Theatre, ape Theatre, Monkey Theatre. You're

0:44:01 Unknown Speaker #4

mhmm.

0:44:01 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:44:08 Unknown Speaker #5

so studied.

0:44:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Well, I've learned all the best types of safety

0:44:12 Unknown Speaker #5

i mean, you basically are marketing genius. It's one thing to have a good product, which we definitely have.

0:44:17 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:44:18 Unknown Speaker #5

But you also have to tell the public about it.

0:44:20 Unknown Speaker #4

Right. You

0:44:21 Unknown Speaker #5

gotta get the butts in the seat. Which we don't actually have. Unfortunately, all of our bikes don't have seats on them. We're working on

0:44:27 Unknown Speaker #1

it. Right.

0:44:28 Unknown Speaker #2

But a lot of people don't have that personality. Like, I think, Todd, you have the personality that it goes out and gets. You have a good idea. You're like, now people gotta know about it. You're not shy when you when you got a hit on your hands.

0:44:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Like what we were talking about earlier with seeing our growth, we're gonna be face forward here.

0:44:48 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah.

0:44:48 Unknown Speaker #3

So I am trying to become what you wanna look like at the end of the gym. So I'm working on my body and my mind. Alright? So I'm doing high intensity training. High intensity interval training.

0:45:00 Unknown Speaker #2

Inner training. Yes.

0:45:01 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah. You go around to different stations. And you've been adding a couple stations to me that don't feel like they're super helpful for the body you'll do a couple of curls, and then you'll hit a station that, you know, has it's a fajita bar. Yeah.

0:45:01 Unknown Speaker #3

Hit

0:45:21 Unknown Speaker #3

It's high intensity interval training. So you have

0:45:23 Unknown Speaker #3

curls, but then you have to enjoy a little food because your body has to be so confused -- Right.

0:45:23 Unknown Speaker #1

to do

0:45:28 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:45:28 Unknown Speaker #2

that you're

0:45:29 Unknown Speaker #3

working And so you have the fajita bar, and then you do a little pooed. Right? Right. Which is a that's a a poop on every diaper. And so we We wired up

0:45:42 Unknown Speaker #3

You jump? You got it. You

0:45:42 Unknown Speaker #4

diapers at different heights. Yeah.

0:45:46 Unknown Speaker #1

jump try to get it

0:45:47 Unknown Speaker #5

and you And

0:45:48 Unknown Speaker #3

by the way, you've just had the peanuts, don't forget. Yeah. So you're gonna need to poo, absolutely.

0:45:51 Unknown Speaker #6

The whole point

0:45:52 Unknown Speaker #5

of exercising is getting your blood moving. Right? This is gonna get your blood boiling.

0:45:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, yeah.

0:45:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. How confusing this?

0:45:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, yeah. Your blood boils. And so then it's the poods and then so you're you're empty now. And so then it's And

0:46:04 Unknown Speaker #2

then go head over to station and sort of, like, throw out any literature that you don't agree with?

0:46:11 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. What what yeah. So I put in books for anyone to hate. You know? Whatever your opinion, it may be you hate Garfield because he's such a lazy little fuck.

0:46:21 Unknown Speaker #5

No. You do.

0:46:22 Unknown Speaker #3

John, and Odi, so disrespectfully.

0:46:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Let's just be honest. It's a Garfield hating booth. What they say.

0:46:33 Unknown Speaker #3

The laziest little fucker. You can't just pick a day and hate it. We all hate Monday's Garfield, but pull ourselves up

0:46:40 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:46:41 Unknown Speaker #3

one leg at a time literally because our legs don't work. We move them to both hands at a time. So you go so so we've got curls, then fajitas, then coupon every diaper, then throw away garfield books. And

0:46:41 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:46:41 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah.

0:46:59 Unknown Speaker #1

are there any other actual known exercises in this regimen? Or is that curls His biceps are they're cute.

0:47:07 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Well, let's just say

0:47:08 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah. Your butt your arms look great.

0:47:10 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, yeah. Well, none exercise is what? Like, push ups?

0:47:14 Unknown Speaker #3

No. And so then After after Garfield, that's rest. Okay? Right.

0:47:14 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:47:19 Unknown Speaker #2

And so that's gotta reach her.

0:47:21 Unknown Speaker #3

That's

0:47:22 Unknown Speaker #3

what did you think it was?

0:47:22 Unknown Speaker #4

what

0:47:23 Unknown Speaker #2

No. You gotta rehabilitate. Incorrect.

0:47:25 Unknown Speaker #3

No. So the rest station, r e s t. Oh, right. And so that

0:47:31 Unknown Speaker #1

really easy sit there.

0:47:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Really easy sit there.

0:47:34 Unknown Speaker #2

No. But that seems like a

0:47:36 Unknown Speaker #4

rest. But it also

0:47:38 Unknown Speaker #5

stands for ready, eat, Wasn't that fun? Some tacos.

0:47:45 Unknown Speaker #2

Ready to eat some tacos.

0:47:46 Unknown Speaker #3

So we get to the rest, rest station now.

0:47:49 Unknown Speaker #1

There's two rests.

0:47:51 Unknown Speaker #3

Why is this so hard for you guys to understand?

0:47:53 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, he hasn't been outside of the terrarium.

0:47:55 Unknown Speaker #1

I'm gonna get an hour ready.

0:47:55 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I'm sorry.

0:47:56 Unknown Speaker #3

But, you know, the the point is I've created a workout that has got my upper body absolutely strong arms only. Yes. And, you know, so I look like I don't know even know what? I guess a pencil with muscle arms. So as I walk around the

0:48:11 Unknown Speaker #1

gym And and and this feels great to me because a lot of times you know, you need motivation, and I feel there's a chance for some synergy here between between you, and Sam, Todd. I think find in a lot a lot of times Sam ends up helping other people and you get left in the dust. But I think this is this is a time where maybe you guys can work together and maybe Sam could get you to a place that you wanna be in. You bring your clients.

0:48:36 Unknown Speaker #3

That's right. Oh, work with me on my body.

0:48:38 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, I could

0:48:39 Unknown Speaker #5

chase my clients over to you

0:48:41 Unknown Speaker #3

and then the and

0:48:42 Unknown Speaker #2

well, yeah. Like, have you taken Sam's initial don't wanna listen to me, run.

0:48:51 Unknown Speaker #3

You know what? I downloaded the app. I downloaded the app, and I just haven't opened it yet. Right. We're doing right so fast. My phone shows that whenever I try to turn the app on. Right. I think I need one of the older Nokia's.

0:49:04 Unknown Speaker #5

It's a little about The app's a little buggy because we couldn't afford to make it for iPhones. So we could only make it for Nokia thirty three nineties, which was the first phone that I had

0:49:14 Unknown Speaker #4

to be. Big Luna. You've been looted

0:49:15 Unknown Speaker #5

too. Exactly. Snake two does have snake two, and it does have this app.

0:49:19 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. But, yeah, I I I would love to work with you, Sam, especially because kind of, you know, I don't want too much stuff on my plate. This happens a lot. Mhmm. But because we're doing the gym and the mental health stuff. I'm doing the advertising and I'm doing my workout station. I I I realized I'm seeing all this look. I I think about all the time this masculinity at the gym and it's made me think what is man. What is men? We really are

0:49:51 Unknown Speaker #2

examining that nowadays.

0:49:53 Unknown Speaker #3

And so I come home

0:49:54 Unknown Speaker #2

because if they're gonna get rid of the kangaroos, which Let's get rid of us.

0:49:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Here's the stick. That that and that we

0:50:00 Unknown Speaker #5

well, that's what I'm worried about. That's what I'm worried about. Once you get rid of the kangaroos, it's the next strongest man.

0:50:05 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Probably us. Probably us. Probably, we're probably second to kangaroos as far as strength goes.

0:50:10 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. For getting -- Both body, big body arms.

0:50:12 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:50:12 Unknown Speaker #5

removed from the earth.

0:50:13 Unknown Speaker #3

Attacking people's dogs, over taking little cities. And so I'm I I I go home after my day at the gym and I'm so amped from seeing my friends. Mhmm. Having a few drinks at at the bar, you know doing my workout stuff that I and I'm seeing all this stuff around.

0:50:31 Unknown Speaker #2

And that's obviously, my bad for the pre workout I gave you before your workout that the caffeine and guarine mixture I had together was a little high

0:50:41 Unknown Speaker #3

well, I said yes too fast because I thought it was caffeine and worry. I thought it was caffeine and worry. I was like Why are

0:50:51 Unknown Speaker #1

you taking just the caffeine?

0:50:52 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, can I say those Dr Pepper commercials

0:50:55 Unknown Speaker #5

are confusing? Those Dr Pepper commercials are confusing. You think you get him and then you buy the twelve pack and it's just cans and you're pissed off.

0:51:04 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, yeah.

0:51:04 Unknown Speaker #2

We have yet to be able to buy Guarini.

0:51:08 Unknown Speaker #3

We've been trying our best. Ever since from Justin to Kelly came out, which I was the first butt in the seat. Yes. We were all there. The premier, and I got kicked out because of bit of a infringement of Well,

0:51:21 Unknown Speaker #2

you were there looking for your residuals.

0:51:23 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes.

0:51:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yes. Because it was

0:51:25 Unknown Speaker #2

you were said you were owed residuals from from Yes.

0:51:27 Unknown Speaker #3

From Justin to Kelly to Todd originally. And it was a poster -- He

0:51:32 Unknown Speaker #5

wrote and started.

0:51:33 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:51:34 Unknown Speaker #3

the dawn of man who was getting worse. You know what I mean. And then they just cut

0:51:39 Unknown Speaker #5

off the third. Originally, the poster was a square, and they cut you off.

0:51:44 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:51:44 Unknown Speaker #5

And that's when posters became up Right.

0:51:46 Unknown Speaker #3

I I it's it's the first time posters were up right. They used to all be square, and then they realized that in the coming office looked better. Because I watch American Idol and I go, There it is right there.

0:51:55 Unknown Speaker #2

Right. Okay. But you were burned by the the poster. You modeled for the poster of evolution as the middle person.

0:52:03 Unknown Speaker #3

Mhmm. Yeah. I yeah. I was, like, not abe. Uh-uh. But not man yet. You know?

0:52:09 Unknown Speaker #5

I get it.

0:52:10 Unknown Speaker #2

I Kind of hopping with one hand.

0:52:12 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. No idea. Oh, and by the way, every time you look at one of those in your biology class,

0:52:17 Unknown Speaker #5

no residuals. Alright.

0:52:19 Unknown Speaker #2

You can't no residuals.

0:52:21 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, what's new?

0:52:22 Unknown Speaker #3

The monkey at the beginning sees residuals. He's Oh, he's large.

0:52:25 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh my god. I was on his boat in the Mediterranean the other day. Absolutely slammed. Me, Seacrest, monkey. Everybody was there.

0:52:33 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, sometimes that's what happens when you can't get a haircut on time. You can't get a haircut on time, and they recast you when you show up.

0:52:40 Unknown Speaker #3

You say you're the middle monkey.

0:52:42 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, they tried to add you behind monkey. Right? When you didn't have haircut?

0:52:46 Unknown Speaker #5

They tried to make you the starting win.

0:52:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. They said well, the trade maker started looking scientists said, we don't get it yet. Like, they this could be, but he seems like some Well, it was,

0:52:55 Unknown Speaker #2

like, it's a big bang and they were like, well, nobody would bang him. It was it was really graphic.

0:52:59 Unknown Speaker #3

He's fucking scientist. Right. Oh, by the way, scientist will roast your ass. Yeah.

0:53:03 Unknown Speaker #3

think they're the nerds?

0:53:03 Unknown Speaker #5

Do you

0:53:05 Unknown Speaker #5

They are turtles, like, cutting. Yeah.

0:53:07 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. The big bang Actually, nobody will bang him. He got the loudest laugh in history. And then didn't

0:53:15 Unknown Speaker #5

it caused a second big guy.

0:53:16 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, that was the big bang. Right? Was a bunch of scientists making that joke and then the universe split.

0:53:22 Unknown Speaker #3

I was around pre history, which was an interesting time I have to tell you but then our history that we're in now all started from scientists roasting me.

0:53:30 Unknown Speaker #3

And it was a bill that ended with that joke, but there were a lot

0:53:30 Unknown Speaker #4

Right.

0:53:33 Unknown Speaker #4

And it

0:53:33 Unknown Speaker #2

and then right.

0:53:33 Unknown Speaker #4

of little

0:53:35 Unknown Speaker #1

did I hear this correctly? Also, there was another scientist there who also auditioned you at the farthest end of the spectrum saying that you are unlike anything we've seen before and may not be like anything we'll ever see, so we need to put you in the future.

0:53:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. Yes. They had me future making for a while

0:53:50 Unknown Speaker #2

on there.

0:53:51 Unknown Speaker #5

You dated Lucy.

0:53:53 Unknown Speaker #6

You and Lucy had a whole thing.

0:53:55 Unknown Speaker #3

Remind me. Don't remind me. Well, it was unfortunately I was the first gotta get canceled because

0:54:05 Unknown Speaker #2

oh, right. In the garden of eden, you got kids. That's alright? You said some weird shit for this snake?

0:54:13 Unknown Speaker #4

A snake.

0:54:14 Unknown Speaker #1

It was a snake?

0:54:15 Unknown Speaker #3

You got you got

0:54:16 Unknown Speaker #1

canceled because you say we are stuck to the devil.

0:54:20 Unknown Speaker #2

Double. Article about time.

0:54:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Right? I put two apples next to the steak, and I went, that's a cocking ball.

0:54:29 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. And then the devil wrote an article. It it

0:54:32 Unknown Speaker #5

good evening.

0:54:33 Unknown Speaker #3

I can't believe. Yeah.

0:54:35 Unknown Speaker #2

And to me, you know, I thought it was kind of a funny

0:54:38 Unknown Speaker #4

yeah.

0:54:38 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:54:38 Unknown Speaker #3

pretty enough. It's alright. Well, then the time.

0:54:40 Unknown Speaker #2

It was a different time.

0:54:41 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. New years later, I did a nice little stand up tour for Issa, Cain and Abel.

0:54:47 Unknown Speaker #1

I saw how they turned off Cain

0:54:48 Unknown Speaker #3

and Abel. It was kind of my comeback, and then, yeah, Cain killed Abel because I was What

0:54:53 Unknown Speaker #1

was the disagreement about your set. Right? One of them liked it, one of them didn't.

0:54:56 Unknown Speaker #2

No. They both hated it. It was just remained more.

0:54:59 Unknown Speaker #3

One said it was funny at the other said it it was too offensive. Right.

0:55:02 Unknown Speaker #4

And it's

0:55:03 Unknown Speaker #3

like, well, it's not offensive. It's offensive because it's not funny there.

0:55:05 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, that does not want you to do an appropriate joke. Right.

0:55:09 Unknown Speaker #3

No. Do you have folks? Yes. When you come out with your disgusting humor, some of the stuff we see out there.

0:55:17 Unknown Speaker #2

But God is funny.

0:55:19 Unknown Speaker #3

God's god bless you.

0:55:20 Unknown Speaker #5

That's a great sense of music person.

0:55:21 Unknown Speaker #2

He's just not here for the inappropriate thing. Yes.

0:55:25 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. Well, I mean, if God

0:55:27 Unknown Speaker #5

have a sense of humor, what his life. Oh my god. Sometimes I feel a little confused.

0:55:27 Unknown Speaker #4

is to

0:55:32 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, honestly, sometimes him creating us feels like it's best joke about. Exactly.

0:55:37 Unknown Speaker #3

Hey god. Hello, well.

0:55:40 Unknown Speaker #2

Hello, well. Oh,

0:55:46 Unknown Speaker #5

god god. It's hilarious. I don't see sometimes when people don't see God's sense of humor, I'm like, what? Hello?

0:55:52 Unknown Speaker #2

I guess we can't be friends. How I know. It's

0:55:58 Unknown Speaker #5

that's how I know there's too many because this

0:56:00 Unknown Speaker #4

whole thing

0:56:01 Unknown Speaker #3

yeah.

0:56:01 Unknown Speaker #5

It's kinda funny.

0:56:02 Unknown Speaker #2

It's kind of hilarious if you think about it. That's why I believe in thoughts.

0:56:07 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, you said that to just look around at the world and I go, hey, god. Good one.

0:56:12 Unknown Speaker #2

Good one, God. Looks like you're gonna have the last laugh on this one.

0:56:18 Unknown Speaker #5

The other day, I swear

0:56:19 Unknown Speaker #4

to god.

0:56:20 Unknown Speaker #5

I had everything ready. I spent an hour in the shower. I got out of my house. I was ready to go, and I packed my pocket and go, where are my keys? Dag.

0:56:30 Unknown Speaker #2

God again. God being so funny with your keys.

0:56:34 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, and the devil just relies on the And

0:56:36 Unknown Speaker #2

let me guess.

0:56:37 Unknown Speaker #1

And let me guess.

0:56:37 Unknown Speaker #3

And the devil relies.

0:56:39 Unknown Speaker #2

They were on your face.

0:56:40 Unknown Speaker #4

They were my freaking hand.

0:56:43 Unknown Speaker #2

That I'm like, where are my keys? Where are my keys? Oh, here they are. And I pull them out of my eyelids.

0:56:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. No. I know. It's hilarious.

0:56:54 Unknown Speaker #3

And then you try to start your car. And you're like, my sunglasses.

0:57:00 Unknown Speaker #2

God is hilarious.

0:57:01 Unknown Speaker #3

That's funny.

0:57:02 Unknown Speaker #2

He makes me laugh.

0:57:04 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh. But it's so speaking of, you know, funny, I guess just to circle all the way back around.

0:57:09 Unknown Speaker #3

working on this play. What is men? And it's really analyzing this idea. But in order to play men, I have to look like a man buff good. And Six pack. So I I'm excited to get in shape with you all mentally.

0:57:09 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I'm

0:57:24 Unknown Speaker #1

And it's gotta be such good research for this too to just be in jam and be around so many guys who are getting up

0:57:29 Unknown Speaker #2

to you. You're gonna get a lot of interesting insight. And it's gonna be because we downsized a little bit, we got rid the Olympic pool, but you're gonna do the play in the round in the pool?

0:57:41 Unknown Speaker #2

So everybody's gonna sit around the top and watch kind of down. It'll be the first sort of like play in that sort of proscenium, if you will.

0:57:41 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yeah.

0:57:49 Unknown Speaker #3

It'll be very good at a very good that's not what a proscenium is, but very good. Yeah. It'll be the first time anyone's ever done a play in a gym pool. It's been emptied out. Olympic says it was the biggest nicest pool in town. We emptied it out. Right now, it's it's the

0:58:05 Unknown Speaker #2

skateboard's heavy. Are breaking their legs.

0:58:07 Unknown Speaker #3

Before he's taking over.

0:58:08 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. So her wrists were tough.

0:58:10 Unknown Speaker #2

A couple of people are trying to do their first half pipes and they're just getting Yes. It's just compound fracture after compound fracture.

0:58:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes.

0:58:18 Unknown Speaker #4

It You know?

0:58:18 Unknown Speaker #3

Say it again. Take your time out. Straight up into the Ambolus.

0:58:22 Unknown Speaker #2

Straight up, book ended, getting the books out

0:58:25 Unknown Speaker #3

at Garfield book. Garfield book's getting out of here. Oh, Oh, fuck Garfield, by the way.

0:58:33 Unknown Speaker #5

You are the one guy who really loves John, who's obsessed with how funny job.

0:58:38 Unknown Speaker #3

It relates to John, I guess. I don't know if I love them. It just makes sense to me. I mean, you I'm getting bored with my ex.

0:58:44 Unknown Speaker #2

Is like an early form of love.

0:58:45 Unknown Speaker #3

That's right. Yes. I I think

0:58:47 Unknown Speaker #2

you can only love somebody that you're alike.

0:58:49 Unknown Speaker #3

If if you're not like somebody or don't have somebody in my life, look, when I had a daughter, I became a feminist, you know. Right. Right. It was like, oh, I don't want anyone to treat my daughter the way I've been treating women my whole life. Right.

0:59:01 Unknown Speaker #5

This is where the whole gar things started. She would shit on the floor, you would call her annoying, lazy, she goes on.

0:59:06 Unknown Speaker #3

Mail me to Mail me to Abu Dhabi five times.

0:59:10 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. I mean, that

0:59:11 Unknown Speaker #3

it's all good.

0:59:12 Unknown Speaker #1

Todd, that is on you for falling for it. What

0:59:14 Unknown Speaker #4

would I get is for

0:59:15 Unknown Speaker #5

wanna go to Abu Dhabi on the

0:59:15 Unknown Speaker #1

I don't

0:59:15 Unknown Speaker #5

this time?

0:59:17 Unknown Speaker #3

victim. Not. Yeah. Power's blaming the victim.

0:59:20 Unknown Speaker #2

No. I Oh, I think I was in a dog crate next to you on that FedEx flight.

0:59:23 Unknown Speaker #3

I remember -- That was you.

0:59:24 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:59:24 Unknown Speaker #2

that was me.

0:59:25 Unknown Speaker #3

I'm sorry. I was crying, but the film I was watching was very emotional.

0:59:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. I actually won a toy breed that year after things the day of Thanksgiving.

0:59:37 Unknown Speaker #4

That's right. Yeah. I want

0:59:38 Unknown Speaker #3

it trotted around by that lady with big hands.

0:59:40 Unknown Speaker #2

That guy, the one of the I tell you what. The one of those The judge pulling my teeth around, looking at my teeth, that I did not think I was gonna make it through even that portion.

0:59:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, you had just gotten a beautiful new wig. Of course, source the hair from a shih tzu.

0:59:57 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. And I had a bunch of little ponytails all out of me, all over. And I was and boy did I trot? Yeah.

1:00:05 Unknown Speaker #3

And he looked in your mouth and you were sweating because you had a cavity. Yes.

1:00:09 Unknown Speaker #2

But Well, they filled my cavity right there on the spot. Luckily for me, and they gave me a root canal. Right?

1:00:16 Unknown Speaker #5

I'm on stage. At the Ukinuba classic.

1:00:19 Unknown Speaker #2

At the Ukinuba classic, I got a root canal. Was very nice.

1:00:23 Unknown Speaker #4

It sounds

1:00:24 Unknown Speaker #3

like a that sounds like a Johnny Cash song.

1:00:26 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Oh oh, he's saying about it. Yeah. For sure. His ghost was there. His ghost came back.

1:00:32 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah.

1:00:34 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. And he he's sang a really rousing song. It was awesome.

1:00:39 Unknown Speaker #3

You know, yeah. Go ahead.

1:00:41 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, I was just gonna say, you know, it's probably almost about time for us to get out of here for this.

1:00:44 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, yeah. We can't we there's I mean, this is rush Sure.

1:00:47 Unknown Speaker #1

I did I did wanna bring up before we get out of here, Bill. I wanted to say, speaking of God, having a sense of humor in a minute. I just wanted to say, I'm so happy that it seems as though your ridiculous voice remission is definitely it's coming through. That's The what? Your your ridiculous voice has been in remission, it sounds like.

1:00:47 Unknown Speaker #5

What's cleaning?

1:01:07 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, yes.

1:01:08 Unknown Speaker #4

It comes. Yes. It's

1:01:10 Unknown Speaker #2

a couple of doctors or geneticists said that it's like, it may be in in remission. Yeah. But Occasionally. So you'll hear it here or there. And it's just it's just one of those finicky things.

1:01:34 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. And it's an experimental thing where they're taking normal voice from some people. In a particular Yeah.

1:01:40 Unknown Speaker #2

They can take plasma -- Folks. -- and make and give me shots in that too.

1:01:46 Unknown Speaker #3

If you have a normal voice, get out there and donate.

1:01:49 Unknown Speaker #2

You have to.

1:01:50 Unknown Speaker #3

Because there

1:01:50 Unknown Speaker #4

are some

1:01:51 Unknown Speaker #3

people out there who sound absolutely nuts. And and they

1:01:55 Unknown Speaker #5

and all it is is peeking into a little cup. You just go in.

1:01:58 Unknown Speaker #2

You speak in to thirty minutes. You can leave by edit.

1:02:01 Unknown Speaker #1

And they'll give you they'll give you a text to read. They'll give you a magazine to read. They'll give you they'll give you something that

1:02:06 Unknown Speaker #2

you want. Go straight to my vocal cords, and I'm able to talk normal for a few hours a day.

1:02:11 Unknown Speaker #1

Listen to Bill right now. Listen to him.

1:02:13 Unknown Speaker #2

I mean, listen to this. I'm running out. A little bit, but I'm on the fritz today because I've used most of my words up. But I I take a big sip of words, and planning and I'm able to speak pretty normally, and it really helps when I'm trying to sell smoothies and supplements.

1:02:32 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. People don't wanna buy a supplement from

1:02:34 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah. Because I can say I can I can't say brown rice protein? Like, I can't I've ran out of normal words of that.

1:02:43 Unknown Speaker #5

Right.

1:02:43 Unknown Speaker #2

So that will come out crazy.

1:02:45 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. So there's certain words we need to hear a lot of. So if you have If you come say brown a bus, browse.

1:02:51 Unknown Speaker #2

Brown rice, please.

1:02:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Record yourself. You can do it in

1:02:53 Unknown Speaker #2

pineapple chunks. I'm running low on. So if you can say that into a tub,

1:02:59 Unknown Speaker #5

bCAA's? Yes. You know what?

1:03:03 Unknown Speaker #1

Everybody, go to your local GNC. Grab every supplement, just read the ingredients into your phone, tweet the voice memo at us.

1:03:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yes.

1:03:10 Unknown Speaker #1

And Bill will listen to it, and he'll recharge, and he should be

1:03:13 Unknown Speaker #3

good. A few more for Bill. Siri don't answer that one. It's mom.

1:03:17 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. What do you mean? It's too watery. I need that. We You're closed. Yes. I'm closed. And then I they said, but you but we just you just opened.

1:03:34 Unknown Speaker #5

I don't

1:03:35 Unknown Speaker #2

know that I need.

1:03:36 Unknown Speaker #5

Did you need to get I'm sorry. The customer's always right?

1:03:40 Unknown Speaker #2

No. Okay. No. No. No. That I have plenty left.

1:03:47 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, folks, come on down to the gym. Yeah. Can we decide on are we gonna reveal the new name today?

1:03:53 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. We or or or we could also Well,

1:03:55 Unknown Speaker #2

we get we're gonna pull the

1:03:57 Unknown Speaker #1

we could pull we could we could pull the members and do and do a Well,

1:04:01 Unknown Speaker #2

we have a sheet over it now.

1:04:02 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

1:04:03 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Do or we don't?

1:04:05 Unknown Speaker #4

have a sheet

1:04:05 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, we

1:04:05 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. No.

1:04:06 Unknown Speaker #5

on it, and maybe we've decided, maybe we haven't. So fill out a slip when you come into the gym -- And

1:04:11 Unknown Speaker #2

will it -- pop

1:04:12 Unknown Speaker #5

it in there?