Y'all hydrate it? Make sure you're hydrated.

Wow. Wow.

Is it good? You guys gotta try the smoothies.

Oh, wow.

Oh, yeah. It sounded

like a

pretty loose smoothie. I made Todd this smoothie pretty good. Right?

It's incredibly loose. Sam's fried. It's one of the looser smoothies I've had.

Yeah. It's a little too watery. I can't quite get the consistency.

What is technically the difference between a smoothie and a juice?

Well, sweetie has to has has solids in it.

You know how you they turn the blizzard upside down and

stay in the cup.

My smoothies are the opposite

of this.

They're somehow more liquid than water. Mhmm. Which I didn't even know that was possible.

Right? Your thing is if you give someone a smoothie and they tip their cup upside down and it spills all over that's a good smoothie.

That's a good smoothie. That's the one and and I do it I've done it after almost every smoothie this morning. I've dumped them on all the It's not working. Opposite Blizzard showcase.

Right.

He's not working. How

i thought It is it is attention grabbing.

Yes.

It's at the front of the gym, and we are trying to get people you know, looking around.

Yes.

Yeah.

And Falling down on spills is not what we were going for, but it's causing a commotion Yes.

People are definitely falling down on spills.

And people are slowing down on the street to be like, who's that getting escorted out of there in that So super upright ambulance bed.

Well, it's it's important.

We know it's a one.

Yes. Because we have so many people getting carded out of this thing, they have to put two in back to back.

Yeah.

So they put them it's like yeah.

You're like book ins. It's like you have book ins.

Yeah. Two book ins. Well, well, we've put some books in between them.

Well, we don't need the books.

We don't need the books We're getting time to get books out of the back.

No. We're kidding, Paul,

you heard yourself, we used them bookends. They blow them in their ambulets, and, of course, they snuck by goodwill. They had donate. Donate, of course.

Yeah.

You have to donate your face. Of course. You have to Well, before we

get going, because we're having a good time. Hello, Bill Cravie.

Oh, are

you starting?

I was burning?

Are you saying hi to us?

Hang on.

Oh, I'll say hey to y'all.

Oh, yeah. I'll feel good.

Hey, hi. Yeah.

Howard, love us.

Hey, now

what's happening just like we always do.

Gotta say,

and then that while we

get embarrassed if we forgot someone's name. Isn't that right?

Somewhere around. Don't remember anyone in that moment.

Yeah. I

think we should just go in and get it going. Yeah.

Let's hit it.

Alright. Here we go. Well, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another season of the teacher's lounge. What once was the first best and only podcast pertaining to issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community. Now, issues relevant to your four favorite teachers. Howard Levis. That's me and my three buddies.

Yeah. Hello, Phil Cravy.

Hi, Todd Podrey feminist.

Hi, Sam Weatherman, formerly mental health, still mental health, and adding physical health.

Yeah. That's great.

That's right. I'm a trainer.

Yeah. And a lot of people are probably wondering a lot of people are probably wondering what what's going on, why they tell him the four of us been in Hamilton this school year. Yeah. We're gonna put those put that information out there. We, of course

and thank you for all the letters and emails.

Yes. We appreciate it.

What the hell is going on? Where the hell are the teachers?

Where people are really upset that we haven't been around the school.

How the hell do I know where you are? I don't.

What the hell is up?

What the hell? I thought I was gonna get another crack at you guys because I got one of those Hell.

Are y'all around or not? Hell start with a hell.

We've been getting a lot of emails subject as hell dot dot dot. Mhmm.

Yeah.

And I

don't know which of those to really read and which of those to discard.

Because at

some point, it's not healthy to take in all these emails. No.

It's not. Oh, I stopped taking a

few emails.

That's good for you.

Heavy mental health wise.

Oh, I don't

i'm gonna get back to you over an email.

Not at all. Yeah. You just think you have your my email. I respond? No. No. Todd, you're working with thirty two thousand on revs. Right?

Yeah. Yeah. I I cracked thirty two k.

And Congratulations. Well

you're taking your time to respond.

I and I'm going back to the beginning. So, of course, I'll start with the very first unread email I have.

Yes. Do you wanna donate to George Bush's campaign?

Sure.

Sure. So you gave GW five grand this week. Is that correct?

Yeah. Yeah. Well,

you tried to do it about.

My donation bounced. Yes.

And who's responsible for the the overdraft fees there? Like, the the chargeback fees You said

george It's my definition of fraud. He said to me I said to him read my lips. No new money from me.

This is and George Bush the first with

robert Herbert Walker Bush.

And you have

you hold the world record for a bounciest checking account. Is that true?

Yeah. Well, I'm sponsored by kangaroos now. And so Jesus.

Well, you're there trying to get the word out about themselves. Yeah. And they need something big to attach.

Do you remember when that guy that kangaroo was ripping that dog apart so that guy punched these squared off and punched it? Yeah. They made a mural He humiliated kangaroos across the world

--

hold on.

--

which are the buffest sexiest men of the animal king. Yes.

They Which we are part of? They're trying to get rid of are there Fox News, I saw a segment the other night. Are there even any kangaroos anymore?

Mhmm. Mhmm.

They're getting rid of the kangaroo.

I don't know if you know this.

Getting railed by a kangaroo. It's been really interesting.

They're trying to get rid of our kangaroo. They're trying to get masculinity out of the kangaroo. They don't

want us to

be kangaroos anymore. No. They want us to be soy

--

yeah.

--

toys.

Koalas. They want to be koalas.

Yeah. E e what's his name? E e Milnett, the the the guy that did Winnie the poo. Yeah. Yeah. You know, he we've got Ro, which is a classic and I'm gonna say it pussy. And we need these

we're gonna say it. We're going there this

season. Uh-huh. And so we need these men kangaroo's back. Mhmm. Gangaroo buff. You'll you'll see some

of the You'll see

some of the keywords. Yeah. I'll tell you now, you don't need to put Buff on there. Google kangaroo and you will see

that's right.

Emos, masculine animal that exists in the animal kingdom. You don't even have to say buff. These these guys are Jack.

Yeah. And you tried to carry

--

toll fear.

--

your son in a little pouch. Right?

I did. Yeah. So You had

a male c section to add a pouch?

That's exactly right. I told the doctor, give me a c section. And he said, like, a cesarean, I said, no. Like, kangaroo, sea sector, maybe.

In kangaroo section. See sector.

You want a kangaroo section right here.

He said that's not I used fucking guru?

He said that I used fucking guru. I said, well, which one is it? It's not what men get or night. You spoke kangaroo. We're having two arguments to doctor to work in.

Doctor k.

It's doctor C. Doctor C.

Say. Doctor say.

Well, hey. I think we're all getting really good. But we took a step away

from school,

and we're really focused

and we do wanna emphasize I know that there was a press release released by Hamilton that said they were placing us on administrative leave But if you weren't consulted

if you look at the date on that letter, we stepped away the day before. We we are stepping away.

They can say whatever they want after the breakup. I know my truth.

Mhmm.

I left and they could not say anything to me.

Yep. Mhmm. We stepped away.

We got out ahead of it. We went on Seth Myers and said, stepping away from the school. We actually have a gym that we're very in love with right now.

Absolutely. I you know what? I don't even remember what teaching is like because I'm so into training now.

Yeah.

And training is so different than teaching.

Because and and everybody probably knows. You you remember the the the wellness center on on thirteenth Street next to the the grocery store.

Yes. Thirteenth Street Wellness Center in disarray. We all remember the article.

Yeah. That's right.

COVID really hit it really hard. Membership sort plummeted over the two years, and they went up on the market. And, you know, the teachers, we're always looking to rehab someone or something. Right? And we we saw as an opportunity.

Anyone but us.

You take the year that we decided to take -- Yes.

--

for our own mental health and physical health. We decided we're gonna buy the thirteenth Street wellness center and we are going to work on ourselves and work on the community in a different capacity than we have done for the past.

Yes. I decided to sell my NFT of a pixelated dirty rat, and I really got out top.

Yeah. It was awesome. That was really huge.

And and so I was able to add a little coin in.

Yeah. A lot of people are partnering with athletes and stuff for NFTs.

Yes.

You went with you went with what was it?

Pizza rat.

Right?

Pizza rat?

Yes. Pizza rat had an n f t. And he he's there's a bunch of different ones. Mhmm. And he has a hat on. He's got a little eyepatch in one. All of them, you can barely tell us

a rat.

Someone Who's pixelated image you've ever seen? Right. So Yeah. One of them, he's pink. And he's got a little gold chain, but I have the original with the pizza in his mouth. Wow. It was it's a one of a kind. And I So Yeah. I sold it.

You sold it in Christina.

Some awesome NFT ads that play, like, after midnight on A and E and on AM radio stations.

Yeah.

Where you are really sweatily trying to convince everybody that this is a good investment.

Yeah. I mean, I start out by screaming one centimeter away from the boom mic. This is not a pyramid scheme, and it peaks out People really are buying.

Well, you would have some trouble at first because you weren't able to mint these. You had to cinnamon them?

Yes. So a lot of people know I was I circumvented the minting process and also the the the fees, the mining fees. Mhmm. And I sentiment Cineman.

So smart. Cinnamon though.

Yeah. Because they they don't realize this. But, unfortunately, I did. It was it sentimenting takes way more energy than meant to

form my Pinting it on a piece of paper. Yes.

Yes. Oh, come on. Fuck the fucking environment. This is all so stupid. You know?

Yeah. Look,

the big businesses are fucking the environment more than we are.

It's not what we got.

And when I read that when I read that there's more cows farted in the environment, than any human on earth other than me. And the the second highest producer of methane other than

the Well, you have a car that runs on a farting cow. Is that right?

I wish it was one farting cow.

Yeah. It's a lot of well, I got in early on the the oil that you put in cars. The you

know -- Biote.

--

and then I convert I I love that so much. I got a second car converted into running on several farting cows. And so

the the car had to be considerably bigger because, of course, the cows have to be close at all times.

Well, here's what has to happen. Is you have to get cows that can walk sideways. Because what you do is it's like an l shape. The car is the angle and then the cow's butt has to be against the gas

tank. Right.

And so

so the cows jump along with the car?

And then jump it and fart

it. Okay.

And luckily, it terrifies them, so they're constantly farting because they go, you know. Well, I think and I've

i've been telling you this, you need to make it like a motorcycle where they're sort of side saddle their side cow.

You know

what I

mean? But it feels to me, your car, to me, feels like what it must have been to see the first steam engine. Go across the America.

Tear

like Weaker electric cars already exist.

Yes. So we've have election. I'll a Tesla go by and then I'll hear Mhmm. And I'm like, that's the future. Yeah. And here comes Todd, thirty five miles an hour max. Trying to merge onto the two ten.

Well, it just makes so much more sense than ruining the earth to make gas. What we wanna do is feed one cow so much food

--

yes.

--

that it makes gas.

Yes. It's a it's a whole circle because I'm feeding the cow my grass, which I can't get rid of because I planted crap grass. And so then the cow farts, oh, by the way, I don't have to pay for a horn in the car because you just slap the cow's ass and it moves.

That's and

that's it. That's no. That saves you so much money.

You got yes. You guys pay for your horns?

Well, you got to I

got a free horse.

What what is your sound like?

Yeah. Your horn is stock. We can tell.

Yeah. You have stock horn. No one respects to stock horn.

Yeah. No. They're not gonna get out of your way.

If you don't have an aftermarket horn, I don't better.

Oh my god. If you are making the most amount of noise when you're going down the street, you get none of my respect. Oh. If you don't rev up by an outdoor cafe. In anything you're driving, go to hell. Go to hell. Yeah.

That's so cool.

I I am sometimes too relaxed at an outdoor cafe. Yes. I need good.

You need to be scared into knowing that you could constantly be run over or

or that there's a cool guy around?

There's a cool guy around. Now here's what here's my question for you, Howard. Obviously, you got the weird horn. But what about headlights? Are you doing the brightest headlights in the business now?

No. Yeah. Because I know I know we've all transferred to sun lights.

No. I no. I

oh, gotta do sun lights. Yeah.

We have small -- isotopes of uranium in the front of our cars that give off a bright beam, ammunition. No.

You guys are the problem on the road. Honestly, you guys are the reason for all the assistance I've had, honestly.

You gotta take a spin in my Muosdah, and I'll take you and I think you'll be really excited with some of the a accoutrements I have

on there.

I'm sorry.

I thought it was a Calvrolet. Was it a Calvrolet?

Well, I don't buy America and it was a

cow boy.

That's a really good policy.

It's not bad American.

Wait. Which kind do Did you buy a a mousta?

I have a mousta now. It was a Calvrolet.

Did you look at Carrolas?

About which one?

Calrolas. Calrolas. Yeah.

I looked at Carolus and they were nice. They'll they were sensible

--

yeah. -- which is very nice. Right.

But

then I saw some guys looking under the hood of a Mooza in the supermarket a parking

lot. Yeah.

And, you

know, you also don't wanna be one of those guys that drive in a Calvrolet or not yeah.

Oh, a Calvriolet? No. A Calvriolet with the with the top down?

I make Oh

my god. A cow vet. A cow vet.

I'm really liking these f cow fifties. Have you seen these?

Oh, yes. Yes. Well, but nice.

Not a lot storage in the cow, which is really nice on there.

Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah.

Yeah. What size

trunk is in your cow?

What else? Very good question. It's boot. It's a boot trunk. So it's basically just enough space for I've got the spare -- Mhmm. -- hoof in there. No. And then Do

you have a spare tire anymore? There's no room that.

No room. Yeah. Which is too bad because I'm going flat a

lot. So

heavy heavy car.

Yeah. But I have triple a at earth. Triple butter.

Poor fun. Does that work?

Yeah. And then what else? I'm just really quick before on. There's Nissan or something like that. Yeah.

I was thinking like something here.

Mhmm.

Yeah. I was thinking like, I don't have it.

I mean, you could maybe go with, like, a Ford,

food. We always set up

what we got what what we have to start with cow

or Mitsmubishi, maybe? Mitsmubishi.

Is there another root word, though, that from cow or moo -- cattle? -- cattle.

--

cattle, cattle, effort. Heafers good. So hefferle. Hefferle is even

closer to

this couch.

So yeah. I didn't have a hefferle. Heparlay.

It's actually heparlay. Heparlay.

That's right.

But when when this gym is

yes. We

gotta get back to the gym. Yeah.

We bought that the gym -- Yeah.

--

because we saw that they're you can tell by the deals the gym is doing that they're about to go under.

Yes.

And they had gotten to the point where bring anyone that is a blood relative or married into your family can come with you to the gym for five dollars each.

It I'm not gonna say that this this that that we're doing this just You can tell. You can tell her besides dollars a year.

It's how dumb smart it

does. Like, we're always on the lookout. Is this five dollars a year? So they were

her kid. Her kid.

I think they were upside down in the real estate or something because five dollars a year. I mean, that what's that? Five cents a day.

Well, they had the guy who solved inflation in the seventies come in. I forget his name. But he took it down to five dollars a year, and he's like, we're gonna be hurting for a while. Right. But this is gonna correct.

And we're gonna we're gonna hike the interest switches on it. Oh, he put

yeah. It it was twenty five percent just to use the five pound dumbbells.

Wow.

Wow. So, yeah, he really whipped it into shape, but it it just eventually you know, choked it out.

Well, at the end of the big short, they have that thing where it's like we asked the guy that this movie was based on what he's invest where he's shorting in the future. Yeah. And he said water. Mhmm. And then after the crisis, I'd also the gym on thirteenth.

And hey, he made close to a billion dollars shorting

oh, yeah. On the stock on stock credits, Stonks, Reddit -- Yes.

--

was people were shorting the hell out of this gym. And actually, Comcast and AT and T tried to come in and buy it, A bunch of companies, we're looking to just graph it on.

Yeah. But we swooped in because, you know and and a lot of people are gonna say, this is some sort of, like, superficial attempt to show the school that we are actually working on ourselves, quote or quote Well, we stepped away. Yeah. But we stepped away. This isn't about sort of sort of performing a growth for the school or anything about like that. This is about finding something else to better ourselves out side of the thing we've done forever. Right? And we've all taken a real shine to to this gym. We have had a blast over the last few months. Sort of all finding our sort of little niche.

Well, a lot of people thought we were gonna come in and clean house. A lot of these companies, these investors, they come in, they buy a company, they absolutely just devastated

the word for this.

No. We did not. We fired what was it? Eighty out of eighty five people. Yeah. And we just took it easy. We'll take

it easy because you gotta keep the main core of people there. So we walked in and pretty unceremoniously fired ADP we end up calling.

We were in person, but we did we sent out an email in person.

Well, you don't wanna make it all personal. You know what I mean? You just wanna let them know. It's business, eighty of you are getting canned. That's what said in the email. And then but everybody

you you punch it up to chicken.

Yes. But everybody

gets everybody also gets when they leave a shit can, which is a can that we have all taken this shit in so that they feel better.

We didn't want him to leave empty handed.

We don't.

Well, before we did, we weren't planning on canning them, but they tried to unionize. And so we went in there and we were like, okay, this isn't gonna work for us.

Yeah. Right.

Here you

go. Take your shit can. Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out, which we're gonna try to do as every person works out of it says, right on your butt.

And just in case you didn't get it, the trash can is for shit.

And somehow, we still miss. We never hit anybody

to the door on the way in. Well, you you see that while scooting out of the door as we tried to sleep.

My question was where were these people taking shits? Did you guys notice our whole staff freaking stunk? They all stunk. They were

full up with it.

I didn't know if they knew how to poop.

Well, some people put signs up that say under knee management. We say the staff doesn't stink anymore. That's what we put up

outside the gym.

Because we all know what you actually wanna hear.

You

know what I mean? Nobody cares about new management is the problem solved.

Yes. Yeah. So we fired the stinkers. We kept five people, and they're all kind of front of house

yeah.

Hot, sexy men and women because, you you know, that's something you can't replace. We can do some of the

other stuff. You can't teach that.

But you need these front of house. I mean, the bodies on these guys.

Because

we're selling a lifestyle. Yes. You know? Yeah.

I mean, not and we're we're self aware. We know you look at us and you don't think, wow. I wanna look like those four guys. You know? Yeah.

Not yet. Not yet.

We're on our way to get there, but but we just wanted to make sure that people walk in and they're like,

oh, this is the kind of

place where I can make progress. I'm not gonna be stuck in the sort of ruts that I found myself in for the last forty years of my life. You know? That because a lot of people say that that

sounds like you were talking about yourself there for

a quick second. As well.

We just understand that everybody's on a journey. Yes.

You know what I mean? Yeah. A journey. And we're on day one of our journey. We're or actually two months ago.

That's why we all posted

our one for two months,

full months.

We all posted our before photos

--

yeah.

--

right when you walk in, and we are working towards our after photos.

We have a sort of a pick, not available icon, like next to what our after will be. Yeah. But they're coming.

That's what we do if you join our gym by the way, which you should. You'll get you'll have a before and after.

New digit.

And as time management Manage it's mandatory.

We'll do

it before

and afters

with time and digital.

After a month at a time, you're trying to avoid the roast wall. So as as the months go on, we take a picture and you you may end up on the roast wall, which is like if you're after isn't a lot of

--

right. -- successful gains and you know we're talking about nice body tightened up a little less ugly. You're fine. Then you're on the road wall. And you're fired from the

you get fired from the gym if you don't make that progress.

We're pooping in a bucket. It's ready for you. I won't be ready to slam the door.

And just don't let the door your ass on the way out.

It will be trying to.

But that's we're not this mean. We just know we have a boot camp mentality now.

And and and we also not we're not above being put on the roast wall. As now, I have been on the roast wall since the day. The gym reopened. Yes. And and, you know, I'm okay with it.

You're alright

with it.

Uh-huh.

And what part of the gym let the audience in on what part of the gym you are handling.

Well, recently It should. Should. I've I've been trying to focus mostly on sort of calming, centering, sort of breathing,

so less of the physical and more of the mental,

breath work.

And and and and

and sort of being in touch with myself because a lot of people who have listened to the podcast probably know that I'm I have a lot of sort of shame about myself and and and everything. And so

we're almost a living example. I mean, you're basically set up to rare.

You're the human body and embodiment shame -- Wow.

--

is what You're kind of a concentrate.

You can

sort of have, like, a

shaver in a terrarium setup. Where you live in there and

i I mean,

you don't even have to say

sort of.

Yeah. Well well

let's let's cut the sort of on that.

Let's explain what your job at the gym really is.

They're an exam We were

we were open to this.

Well, because here's the thing.

Really understand it. We were like, so you have at terrarium in the center that you live in.

Well, it was, of course, the racquetball gym that nobody was using. So instead of having racquetball, they already have the windows.

Well, we had to make cuts, obviously, so we could get away like, it was hemorrhaging money five dollars a year. Yeah.

Sorry.

So we don't need the racquet ball

ball. Hey, guys, from the seventies. Sorry. Racket balls out.

And most of the people playing more, you know, old -- Ugly. -- ugly.

Yeah. So we didn't need anymore. So, yeah,

i We're

looking for basketball players. We're looking for people who are interested in watching a movie spider.

Well, I am living in in in the wreck of Wall Court. We have sort of added some some astroturf and a sort of it it is.

And of people are saying this, why are we talking about this episode one? The fact this is the this one was the one of the wildest points of your this reality. How could it get any crazy?

We're trained like an animal. We're trained like an animal. You're doing spider

walk.

And and and it's cutting you.

It's And

and the reason I even wanted

to do this in the

first place.

The reason I wanted to do this in the first place is because if you live your life on display, there is no opportunity for being self conscious anymore. I I'm putting myself out there -- Yes.

--

so that I I I wake up every day knowing that everyone will know every single thing about me that happens to me, twenty four seven LiveStream, you can watch it. If you can't make it to the gym, there's a link, HowardStream, dot com. Yeah.

How does your life change if you're under constant surveillance or if anybody could tune in at any time? What who are you as person if somebody's constantly wanting And

what's beautiful to see that we haven't all arrived? We're on our journey. This is part of your health journey.

Yeah. It's kind of a mental experience for you because

--

yes. -- human beings. Everybody kind of thing where he he challenges the the the the human body and the human spirit

and

spirit with his quote unquote tricks.

And this is and you're calling it

we're not sure if they're tricks.

Yes. You're calling it twenty or twenty four days with no price. Obviously?

Yes.

Yeah.

It's what you're calling.

Very quippy, very easy. It's great on a flyer.

Four days.

Twenty four days with no privacy with Howard Levis. A lot of people say the two with are a little clunky. And I say, I'm sorry.

It's kind of like the guy who ate McDonald's for twenty years.

It's very much like too long. Precise. Yes.

No. I'm not talking

about super science.

You're talking about time.

Because he beat you feed him to that idea by Seventeen

years? Yeah. Right. You were

at McDonald's every meal for twenty for seventeen years before

wait. Did you stop?

You're at McDonald's? Yeah. Well

probably had well,

it's so weird.

By choice. I'm ordering McDonald's now.

It's so weird. Todd had eaten so many McDonald's. He had turned into a quarter pounder with cheese. And that guy ate him.

Yeah. Morgan, the last episode is Morgan Spurlock taking a bite out of me and puking.

Well, good for him and you both.

Yeah. Well, you know, we well, we'll see. I've I've seen no residuals on that document. So we'll see.

What's now?

I do wanna say to everybody out there,

you know, it's hard receiving no residual. What?

It's

no it's I'm on your side. No.

I know. I know.

It's unfortunate

to you.

What I mean, excited about this because this is a real feat.

And and it is it is not just a Levis only. If if other people wanna participate, we did convert two of the other racquetball courts in the terrariums that you can rent

for -- Yeah.

We have. -- weeks or months at a time if you'd like to.

We have the rock. We have the rock.

There's nothing rock spider

man is here. We have them all. You can do it if you want, and and participate in this in this sort of mental wellness experiment that I -- Right. -- I'm participating.

And what would you say you've learned so far in there?

You know, I still think I'm in the adjustment process where my mind has it sort of

you're a little wide Yeah. I, you know I

will figure out how to get out the fluorescent, like, racquetball lights and get something a little better for you. No.

Hey. And, you know, I don't even want that. I want I want I'm perfectly bummed. Okay.

Alright. Well, then we won't do that. I

i'm just saying, I'm rolling with the punches here because that what this is all about. Right.

That's about me.

It's possible with the life I've been given in the person that I am -- Mhmm.

--

and just sort of living living in my own

yeah. Do I need privacy?

Well, this is sort of a question we ask. You think that you can't get any better? What if you gave it a month? What if you gave it a month of working hard? And if that doesn't work, you're fired, and we never wanna see you again.

Right.

But take the month.

Yeah. You

know, for example, I'm a trainer, and I am a one on one trainer for anybody who wants to come in. Am I in shape yet? Not at all.

Right. No.

I can't even do the exercises that I'm asking people to do as an example. So they have to come in with pretty good knowledge. But I'm gonna get there.

Absolutely. Because we're all helping you study for your trainer's exam.

Yes.

You're all sending me YouTube links. You're all sending me those pictures of old guys. Who just did little tiny weights, but they do about a thousand reps and get really buff.

Yes. I mean, you do have the singlet the leather balls, all of the sort of nineteen forties workout equipment. They look hairballs. The little jiggle jiggle belt

oh, you're you're constantly on that jiggle button. Your skin looks very loose.

It it I think the loosest my skin's ever been. And I'm really proud of it. My stomach hasn't changed in size, but the underneath is disconnected from the outside, which is really feels good.

So it shook a it shook your skin away from your body kind of.

Kind of.

And dropped it to the ground.

Yes. Kind of. What's that like?

I I can't think of anyone that people would be luckier to be motivated by. Mhmm. I mean, the creator of the big nightmare. The inventor of the baseball haunted massage. Yeah. The the the the man who is

blue up the Lou. Who

blew up the Lou?

I really appreciate these.

You you are a man who can motivate people to their darkest most intense cells.

That's right.

And they express those and they work them out and and I'm real I've really enjoyed watching you train people.

And you do have

you have sort of taken on a few clients already. Right? Your your schedule is surprisingly booked

it's really booked. Yeah. Absolutely. Who do I have this afternoon? I got Lufarigno this afternoon, then I

a walk himself.

That's a big one.

So the scare tactics videos you've been airing around town

yeah. Lofer Igno has gotten too calm, and that's his admission. He says, I don't have the rage I used to. Because that's what working out really is. Do you really wanna get that bench press up?

Right.

You need to get your anger up.

Yeah. I saw your commercials, like, do you have strained relationships with your family.

Mhmm.

Are you worried you're not enough? Mhmm. Are you worried you're gonna are you worried you're gonna get in a car accident?

Yeah. Do you see a red light and wanna go?

And then after those questions, it says tune in to the next commercial break for more of this commercial because you never got the answer.

Pose questions and unfortunately.

Confuse you. Are you upset when you see the inside of a library? Yes. What is the funeral for?

Yes. So many questions.

Like, really dead.

Why are we going? Yeah. I mean,

at the

very and What communal four gave me so much pause? Yeah. If I well,

i was in the midst

of a funeral.

Mhmm.

And I walked away.

Mhmm. Yeah.

So thank you for watching.

Well, it's good you walked away because you were watching those commercials very low.

Well, they were, like, silence your phones. And I was, like, I'm not getting a call, but I am watching full volume Yeah.

I'm gonna silence my phone, but

i'm not gonna silence my AirPods, but then, of course, they don't connect your phones playing Yes.

Yes. So I tumped the casket over and I rolled. But eventually, in part four of your commercial, you say try my training session.

Trilight training session. Come exercise. You'll get a great deal. First training session is free. The other ten are mandatory.

So the first training session is free. The other tenor mandatory. But the first one's free, and then you just hound the people that come to the gym. Yes. And make them feel terrible that they haven't taken you on. And you feel make them feel guilty about the first session they took?

Absolutely. Well, everybody's got anger inside, and I find that really comes out where

the -- Right.

--

mirror around me, it really comes out.

So people are ducking off trying to avoid your eye contact.

Well, that's that's the super platinum plan. Right. You come to the gym and just try to avoid me, but I'll chase you the whole time. And that is a good workout. Right. Because we added a lot of stairs.

Yes. You have a

lot of stairs to the gym. You can't just have a ground floor.

And a lot of people just not trying to talk to you and they get they get so sweaty.

It's the workout you could get is is is running away from an annoying guy. Yeah.

You know, I think gets my heart rate higher than running into you at a party.

I know. I know. A lot of people have said that. A lot of people have said, like, will you train me and buy and buy that? I just mean come up and talk to

me. Right. Yeah.

And Sort of I remember getting absolutely ripped during a monotonous conversation with you at a party. And I've I've never looked better than that. I I would go I would sit through you talking about

well, it's emotional confusion.

Yeah. Yes.

I I

start talking about one thing that I immediately change subject wildly I don't care at all if you're with me in the conversation. Right?

Even you're talking now, my abs are tightening up my core because I'm so anxious. I'm like, holding my whole body tight. I'm not breathing very nicely. Right. Right. My body thinks I am in flight. Right. And so it's burning calories.

Right. That's not because of me. You understand what I'm saying? That isn't

me. Totally.

That's a good thing.

Jeez. I'm sweating.

Yeah. I need to take I need to take a little jittery here. Yeah.

I think I'm ready to take a break.

Yeah. Listening

to you talk about hobbies you started during the pandemic absolutely gets me shredded.

Have I told you about me making banana, Brett? I can't figure out the leavener. Okay. How do you get it?

I need a hand towel. I'm sweating profuse it.

I keep telling you every time you bring it up I've got all the rotten bananas you need covered in the white place.

I know. But I don't want they're just not as rotten as I like them. If I'm being fully

honest, I'd

like to get them full and then they put it in the freezer.

But we're thinking I just made another one.

Now what I know it's watery but so there's is this kale and So ice cream?

Yeah. That's kale juice. Ice cream juice. Kale juice. Well, kale juice. Well, kale milk because you can milk anything. I got a milking machine.

I have your check. Could milk me.

God. That was good. And we got that playing at all times here

at the morning.

Oh, yeah. Gee, we got Meet The Fucks playing here.

Now meet the parents.

Meet the fucking

i love that story and meet the fuck. Yeah. It's

we got it play it all the time. And we actually filmed our own deleted scene where the nipples get milled.

The nipples get milked.

De Niro gets his nipples milk.

Well, dear. Niro, a huge wing.

All the fuckers. Huge wink.

Huge wink to me. It's Sam.

Sam just is there. It's Mill by

all the fuckers. From the wrong movie. I accidentally I accidentally came in, dressed as him from the media.

It's a twenty minute long scene where Samris Nero gets fully milked weatherfuckers.

The fox.

Not the fuckers. The fox. All the fucks go, what is that? He bleeds him dry,

if milk it's it's not meat the fuckers, it's milked by fuckers.

It's milked by fuckers.

And we're out to production companies who are interested in buying this for some sort of short form content as well.

Five hookers is get is it it was on the

these are the jumbo tron.

It was we hyper

we circumvented the kiss cam and played the milk and players.

Well, I think And my theory, a lot of people got pregnant then.

Yes. The Hamilton mosquitoes were playing. The minorly face mask. The minor the minorly face mask. I can't believe

we haven't talked about the hills of mosquitoes

well, I mean, they were yeah. They were striking for so long. Yeah. They're finally back.

And they're up against the Bellfield areas?

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I but we circumvented the kiss cam, and we got milked by fuckers.

That was a jumbo truck.

I mean, I think, it's safe to say, we have a lot of new stuff going on.

Yes.

And if you really wanna see it, it's hard to describe. You just gotta come down to the gym, and sign up.

Yeah. Yeah. You got to. And like, you know, you can come by. I'm at the smoothie making station slash supplement bar.

Mhmm.

And I do have a milking machine, but I've yet to, you know, sort of create a house You want a house cocktail or a house drink

or a house water. You can only get from us.

You've been messing with alcoholic chunks at the gym.

Oh, I've got a pea protein vodka, a chalk shot. Awesome. That will get you absolutely fucked up and get your muscles what they need. Wow. Yeah. But but, yeah, it is a it's it is a It has a sports bar feel to it sometimes, which I think I need to back off on the

--

mhmm.

--

on the Jello shots, and the shooters, and the the beakers and the and the plugs and everything I'm serving there. But, yeah, want it to be fun. I want it to be like a hangout area. Yeah. But I am making two day old sandwiches in cellophane that people are loving. That's great. Everybody got this.

Just so hungry after a workout that you need the first thing you walk by.

Well, I get all my best ideas from food at the air port. And I And not just food ideas. No. I'll I'll book a a little a little flight to, you know, Arizona, but I'll just show up to, like, get ideas from the airport. Like, oh, just just Chinese in the terminal? Great idea.

Eight AM. Eight AM? Yeah. Why would anyone want breakfast right now? Right.

Yeah. Across the threshold, seventy dollar water, Dad, I love

i've seen you just walking by and tapping the breads at the wolfgang puck's just trying to figure out the exact stillness of

it. Yes.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So but so far it's going yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I'll tap. I'll tap.

And you're for for for produce, for for bananas, apples, all that kind

of stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

You're not doing the they have those, like, imperfect produce or whatever. You're doing the the version of imperfect that's the next step. Right? Yes. It's Never receptible?

Yeah. Yeah. Never acceptable. Never acceptable produce. Sort of like a need to study need to study produce. So it's it's very heavily basically, GMOs have started creating new things. And one of them is it looks like when you shake a pencil and it looks like it's kinda doing like a it's basically a banana that moves. Oh, my. Which I am serving. Mhmm. What and yeah. So it's GMolis is what I have there.

Yeah. Only oh, so everything's

genetically modified only. Only. Is is what's in my little basket

right now.

Yeah. Because the I mean, these foods are going to waste. You know, these sort of, like, new new apples and

--

mhmm. -- it's the same process that you get like a honey crisp Apple where they bring

to evolution.

Together. So they'll bring, like, you know, a piece of iron and a mango, and it's kind of one thing.

Mhmm.

Mhmm. And and it's not edible yet, but we're working on it.

Bill, I I I also wanna point out that you've been spending a lot of time at the airport. Just kind of I I feel like you're lonely maybe ever since the breakup. You had such a nice relationship going. And it seems like you're you're you know, you say it's about food, but I think you're trying to, like, meet people in distress or something like

that. Yeah. Yeah. I have been going to the airport. I just find it very romantic there. Sort of people saying their goodbyes. You know, it's the same concept as, like, funerals or weddings or or or other places where emotions are heightened.

Yeah. Right when someone says they're goodbye, you're swooping right in there and like, Hey, I'm still here.

Yes. Exactly. So I look for goodbyes out near the, you know, two a through see departures area, and I'll tell these people. Sure.

What camera?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And and very respectful, but I'll tell some people that look like there may be like, oh, this long distance ain't gonna work out. And I'll, you know, I'll cry eating a bag of dried vegetables.

Classic airport snacks.

Classic. Well, I see that. I gotta walk up to that person and help them offer

them all. Are you okay? Yeah. What's going on? Can I help you?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I've had a lot of success here. I mean, I flew to Albuquerque,

that is successful. Yeah. Congrats.

Yeah. I stowed away in a dog crate to out Turkey. Froze slap to death. Almost froze slap to death in that. But I bring my own oxygen

--

mhmm. -- because, you know, there's no much oxygen once you get up to thirty thousand.

Did you find companionship in Albuquerque or did someone think you were their dog for a few weeks?

Yes. Yes. Well, What's k nine companionship actually really mimics.

Yeah.

So if somebody thinks you are their dog, eventually, you can cut the ruse and be like, you can stand up from the bowl and be like, I'm actually a man, and I noticed you've been having some trouble in your relationship. And usually, they scream. They run outside. They're like, how did I not notice? Now that I looked at -- Right.

Right.

--

disguise was terrible.

Where's my dog?

Where's my dog? What after the dog?

I have to call letterman and tell him we lied on stupid pet tricks. I'm a human at her though.

Oh my god. I went to so many talk shows.

Caesar Milan, trained you.

Caesar Milan beat the shit out of me for two weeks. So Yes. Yes. He was breaking me. He would try to break me because I kept, like, biting the mail unless it came out of the spot. Right. Right. I would rip apart some pre sorted

dogs are supposed to hit the mailman

after that.

Why you have my wires crossed? Yeah. I would hate the mail, not the mail, man.

I hate the mail, not the mailman.

Let the I would let the the Hydrant pee on me. I was messed up there for a while. But I'm gonna get it figured out. I think I'm I'm less into finding love now or just letting love come to me at the smoothie bar. Hopefully.

It's a great place because the part like like, you know, a lot of people, you know, they wanna flirt with the bartender, Yes. You're you're kind of taking that approach now where you're kinda playing it cool, sorta leaning back instead of leaning forward.

Exactly. And Todd is doing a great job of getting most of the town in front of us. He's really doing a good job here at the gym with but I don't wanna say exactly what you do.

Well, yeah. I I I'm I've used my performance, let's just say experience. Uh-huh. And Yeah.

Let's just say that. I

think that's an alright word for the situation to kind of put out advertisement and let people know about the gym through my ideas of good advertising that I think I've learned through Gorilla Theatre

--

mhmm.

--

and through Macau Macak Theatre, ape Theatre, Monkey Theatre. You're

so studied.

Yeah. Well, I've learned all the best types of safety

i mean, you basically are marketing genius. It's one thing to have a good product, which we definitely have.

Yes.

But you also have to tell the public about it.

Right. You

gotta get the butts in the seat. Which we don't actually have. Unfortunately, all of our bikes don't have seats on them. We're working on

it. Right.

But a lot of people don't have that personality. Like, I think, Todd, you have the personality that it goes out and gets. You have a good idea. You're like, now people gotta know about it. You're not shy when you when you got a hit on your hands.

Like what we were talking about earlier with seeing our growth, we're gonna be face forward here.

Yeah.

So I am trying to become what you wanna look like at the end of the gym. So I'm working on my body and my mind. Alright? So I'm doing high intensity training. High intensity interval training.

Inner training. Yes.

Hit

yeah. You go around to different stations. And you've been adding a couple stations to me that don't feel like they're super helpful for the body you'll do a couple of curls, and then you'll hit a station that, you know, has it's a fajita bar. Yeah.

It's high intensity interval training. So you have

to do

curls, but then you have to enjoy a little food because your body has to be so confused -- Right.

--

that you're

working And so you have the fajita bar, and then you do a little pooed. Right? Right. Which is a that's a a poop on every diaper. And so we We wired up

diapers at different heights. Yeah.

You jump? You got it. You

jump try to get it

and you And

by the way, you've just had the peanuts, don't forget. Yeah. So you're gonna need to poo, absolutely.

The whole point

of exercising is getting your blood moving. Right? This is gonna get your blood boiling.

Oh, yeah.

Yes. How confusing this?

Oh, yeah. Your blood boils. And so then it's the poods and then so you're you're empty now. And so then it's And

then go head over to station and sort of, like, throw out any literature that you don't agree with?

Yeah. What what yeah. So I put in books for anyone to hate. You know? Whatever your opinion, it may be you hate Garfield because he's such a lazy little fuck.

No. You do.

John, and Odi, so disrespectfully.

Let's just be honest. It's a Garfield hating booth. What they say.

The laziest little fucker. You can't just pick a day and hate it. We all hate Monday's Garfield, but pull ourselves up

--

yeah.

--

one leg at a time literally because our legs don't work. We move them to both hands at a time. So you go so so we've got curls, then fajitas, then coupon every diaper, then throw away garfield books. And

are there any other actual known exercises in this regimen? Or is that curls His biceps are they're cute.

Yeah. Well, let's just say

yeah. Your butt your arms look great.

Well, yeah. Well, none exercise is what? Like, push ups?

Yeah.

No. And so then After after Garfield, that's rest. Okay? Right.

And so that's gotta reach her.

That's

what

what did you think it was?

No. You gotta rehabilitate. Incorrect.

No. So the rest station, r e s t. Oh, right. And so that

really easy sit there.

Really easy sit there.

No. But that seems like a

rest. But it also

stands for ready, eat, Wasn't that fun? Some tacos.

Ready to eat some tacos.

So we get to the rest, rest station now.

There's two rests.

Why is this so hard for you guys to understand?

Well, he hasn't been outside of the terrarium.

Yeah. I'm sorry.

I'm gonna get an hour ready.

But, you know, the the point is I've created a workout that has got my upper body absolutely strong arms only. Yes. And, you know, so I look like I don't know even know what? I guess a pencil with muscle arms. So as I walk around the

gym And and and this feels great to me because a lot of times you know, you need motivation, and I feel there's a chance for some synergy here between between you, and Sam, Todd. I think find in a lot a lot of times Sam ends up helping other people and you get left in the dust. But I think this is this is a time where maybe you guys can work together and maybe Sam could get you to a place that you wanna be in. You bring your clients.

That's right. Oh, work with me on my body.

Well, I could

chase my clients over to you

and then the and

well, yeah. Like, have you taken Sam's initial don't wanna listen to me, run.

You know what? I downloaded the app. I downloaded the app, and I just haven't opened it yet. Right. We're doing right so fast. My phone shows that whenever I try to turn the app on. Right. I think I need one of the older Nokia's.

It's a little about The app's a little buggy because we couldn't afford to make it for iPhones. So we could only make it for Nokia thirty three nineties, which was the first phone that I had

to be. Big Luna. You've been looted

too. Exactly. Snake two does have snake two, and it does have this app.

Yes. But, yeah, I I I would love to work with you, Sam, especially because kind of, you know, I don't want too much stuff on my plate. This happens a lot. Mhmm. But because we're doing the gym and the mental health stuff. I'm doing the advertising and I'm doing my workout station. I I I realized I'm seeing all this look. I I think about all the time this masculinity at the gym and it's made me think what is man. What is men? We really are

examining that nowadays.

And so I come home

because if they're gonna get rid of the kangaroos, which Let's get rid of us.

Here's the stick. That that and that we

well, that's what I'm worried about. That's what I'm worried about. Once you get rid of the kangaroos, it's the next strongest man.

Yes. Probably us. Probably us. Probably, we're probably second to kangaroos as far as strength goes.

Yeah. For getting -- Both body, big body arms.

--

removed from the earth.

Attacking people's dogs, over taking little cities. And so I'm I I I go home after my day at the gym and I'm so amped from seeing my friends. Mhmm. Having a few drinks at at the bar, you know doing my workout stuff that I and I'm seeing all this stuff around.

And that's obviously, my bad for the pre workout I gave you before your workout that the caffeine and guarine mixture I had together was a little high

well, I said yes too fast because I thought it was caffeine and worry. I thought it was caffeine and worry. I was like Why are

you taking just the caffeine?

Well, can I say those Dr Pepper commercials

are confusing? Those Dr Pepper commercials are confusing. You think you get him and then you buy the twelve pack and it's just cans and you're pissed off.

Oh, yeah.

We have yet to be able to buy Guarini.

We've been trying our best. Ever since from Justin to Kelly came out, which I was the first butt in the seat. Yes. We were all there. The premier, and I got kicked out because of bit of a infringement of Well,

you were there looking for your residuals.

Yes.

Yes. Yes. Because it was

you were said you were owed residuals from from Yes.

From Justin to Kelly to Todd originally. And it was a poster -- He

wrote and started.

--

the dawn of man who was getting worse. You know what I mean. And then they just cut

off the third. Originally, the poster was a square, and they cut you off.

Yeah.

And that's when posters became up Right.

I I it's it's the first time posters were up right. They used to all be square, and then they realized that in the coming office looked better. Because I watch American Idol and I go, There it is right there.

Right. Okay. But you were burned by the the poster. You modeled for the poster of evolution as the middle person.

Mhmm. Yeah. I yeah. I was, like, not abe. Uh-uh. But not man yet. You know?

I get it.

I Kind of hopping with one hand.

Yeah. No idea. Oh, and by the way, every time you look at one of those in your biology class,

no residuals. Alright.

You can't no residuals.

Oh, what's new?

The monkey at the beginning sees residuals. He's Oh, he's large.

Oh my god. I was on his boat in the Mediterranean the other day. Absolutely slammed. Me, Seacrest, monkey. Everybody was there.

Well, sometimes that's what happens when you can't get a haircut on time. You can't get a haircut on time, and they recast you when you show up.

You say you're the middle monkey.

Well, they tried to add you behind monkey. Right? When you didn't have haircut?

They tried to make you the starting win.

Yeah. They said well, the trade maker started looking scientists said, we don't get it yet. Like, they this could be, but he seems like some Well, it was,

like, it's a big bang and they were like, well, nobody would bang him. It was it was really graphic.

He's fucking scientist. Right. Oh, by the way, scientist will roast your ass. Yeah.

Do you

think they're the nerds?

They are turtles, like, cutting. Yeah.

Yeah. The big bang Actually, nobody will bang him. He got the loudest laugh in history. And then didn't

it caused a second big guy.

Well, that was the big bang. Right? Was a bunch of scientists making that joke and then the universe split.

I was around pre history, which was an interesting time I have to tell you but then our history that we're in now all started from scientists roasting me.

Right.

And it was a bill that ended with that joke, but there were a lot

of little

and then right.

And it

did I hear this correctly? Also, there was another scientist there who also auditioned you at the farthest end of the spectrum saying that you are unlike anything we've seen before and may not be like anything we'll ever see, so we need to put you in the future.

Right. Yes. They had me future making for a while

on there.

You dated Lucy.

You and Lucy had a whole thing.

Remind me. Don't remind me. Well, it was unfortunately I was the first gotta get canceled because

oh, right. In the garden of eden, you got kids. That's alright? You said some weird shit for this snake?

A snake.

It was a snake?

You got you got

canceled because you say we are stuck to the devil.

Double. Article about time.

Right? I put two apples next to the steak, and I went, that's a cocking ball.

Yeah. And then the devil wrote an article. It it

good evening.

I can't believe. Yeah.

And to me, you know, I thought it was kind of a funny

--

yeah.

--

pretty enough. It's alright. Well, then the time.

It was a different time.

Yeah. New years later, I did a nice little stand up tour for Issa, Cain and Abel.

I saw how they turned off Cain

and Abel. It was kind of my comeback, and then, yeah, Cain killed Abel because I was What

was the disagreement about your set. Right? One of them liked it, one of them didn't.

No. They both hated it. It was just remained more.

One said it was funny at the other said it it was too offensive. Right.

And it's

like, well, it's not offensive. It's offensive because it's not funny there.

Well, that does not want you to do an appropriate joke. Right.

No. Do you have folks? Yes. When you come out with your disgusting humor, some of the stuff we see out there.

But God is funny.

God's god bless you.

That's a great sense of music person.

He's just not here for the inappropriate thing. Yes.

Yes. Well, I mean, if God

is to

have a sense of humor, what his life. Oh my god. Sometimes I feel a little confused.

Well, honestly, sometimes him creating us feels like it's best joke about. Exactly.

Hey god. Hello, well.

Hello, well. Oh,

god god. It's hilarious. I don't see sometimes when people don't see God's sense of humor, I'm like, what? Hello?

I guess we can't be friends. How I know. It's

that's how I know there's too many because this

whole thing

yeah.

It's kinda funny.

It's kind of hilarious if you think about it. That's why I believe in thoughts.

Oh, you said that to just look around at the world and I go, hey, god. Good one.

Good one, God. Looks like you're gonna have the last laugh on this one.

The other day, I swear

to god.

I had everything ready. I spent an hour in the shower. I got out of my house. I was ready to go, and I packed my pocket and go, where are my keys? Dag.

God again. God being so funny with your keys.

Oh, and the devil just relies on the And

let me guess.

And the devil relies.

And let me guess.

They were on your face.

They were my freaking hand.

That I'm like, where are my keys? Where are my keys? Oh, here they are. And I pull them out of my eyelids.

Yeah. No. I know. It's hilarious.

And then you try to start your car. And you're like, my sunglasses.

God is hilarious.

That's funny.

He makes me laugh.

Oh. But it's so speaking of, you know, funny, I guess just to circle all the way back around.

Yeah. I'm

working on this play. What is men? And it's really analyzing this idea. But in order to play men, I have to look like a man buff good. And Six pack. So I I'm excited to get in shape with you all mentally.

And it's gotta be such good research for this too to just be in jam and be around so many guys who are getting up

to you. You're gonna get a lot of interesting insight. And it's gonna be because we downsized a little bit, we got rid the Olympic pool, but you're gonna do the play in the round in the pool?

Yes. Yeah.

So everybody's gonna sit around the top and watch kind of down. It'll be the first sort of like play in that sort of proscenium, if you will.

It'll be very good at a very good that's not what a proscenium is, but very good. Yeah. It'll be the first time anyone's ever done a play in a gym pool. It's been emptied out. Olympic says it was the biggest nicest pool in town. We emptied it out. Right now, it's it's the

skateboard's heavy. Are breaking their legs.

Before he's taking over.

Yeah. So her wrists were tough.

A couple of people are trying to do their first half pipes and they're just getting Yes. It's just compound fracture after compound fracture.

Yes.

It You know?

Say it again. Take your time out. Straight up into the Ambolus.

Straight up, book ended, getting the books out

at Garfield book. Garfield book's getting out of here. Oh, Oh, fuck Garfield, by the way.

You are the one guy who really loves John, who's obsessed with how funny job.

It relates to John, I guess. I don't know if I love them. It just makes sense to me. I mean, you I'm getting bored with my ex.

Is like an early form of love.

That's right. Yes. I I think

you can only love somebody that you're alike.

If if you're not like somebody or don't have somebody in my life, look, when I had a daughter, I became a feminist, you know. Right. Right. It was like, oh, I don't want anyone to treat my daughter the way I've been treating women my whole life. Right.

This is where the whole gar things started. She would shit on the floor, you would call her annoying, lazy, she goes on.

Mail me to Mail me to Abu Dhabi five times.

Yeah. I mean, that

it's all good.

Todd, that is on you for falling for it. What

would I get is for

this time?

I don't

wanna go to Abu Dhabi on the

victim. Not. Yeah. Power's blaming the victim.

No. I Oh, I think I was in a dog crate next to you on that FedEx flight.

I remember -- That was you.

--

that was me.

I'm sorry. I was crying, but the film I was watching was very emotional.

Yeah. I actually won a toy breed that year after things the day of Thanksgiving.

That's right. Yeah. I want

it trotted around by that lady with big hands.

That guy, the one of the I tell you what. The one of those The judge pulling my teeth around, looking at my teeth, that I did not think I was gonna make it through even that portion.

Well, you had just gotten a beautiful new wig. Of course, source the hair from a shih tzu.

Yes. And I had a bunch of little ponytails all out of me, all over. And I was and boy did I trot? Yeah.

And he looked in your mouth and you were sweating because you had a cavity. Yes.

But Well, they filled my cavity right there on the spot. Luckily for me, and they gave me a root canal. Right?

I'm on stage. At the Ukinuba classic.

At the Ukinuba classic, I got a root canal. Was very nice.

It sounds

like a that sounds like a Johnny Cash song.

Yes. Oh oh, he's saying about it. Yeah. For sure. His ghost was there. His ghost came back.

Yeah.

Yeah. And he he's sang a really rousing song. It was awesome.

You know, yeah. Go ahead.

Oh, I was just gonna say, you know, it's probably almost about time for us to get out of here for this.

Well, yeah. We can't we there's I mean, this is rush Sure.

What's cleaning?

I did I did wanna bring up before we get out of here, Bill. I wanted to say, speaking of God, having a sense of humor in a minute. I just wanted to say, I'm so happy that it seems as though your ridiculous voice remission is definitely it's coming through. That's The what? Your your ridiculous voice has been in remission, it sounds like.

Oh, yes.

It comes. Yes. It's

a couple of doctors or geneticists said that it's like, it may be in in remission. Yeah. But Occasionally. So you'll hear it here or there. And it's just it's just one of those finicky things.

Yeah. And it's an experimental thing where they're taking normal voice from some people. In a particular Yeah.

They can take plasma -- Folks. -- and make and give me shots in that too.

If you have a normal voice, get out there and donate.

You have to.

Because there

are some

people out there who sound absolutely nuts. And and they

and all it is is peeking into a little cup. You just go in.

You speak in to thirty minutes. You can leave by edit.

And they'll give you they'll give you a text to read. They'll give you a magazine to read. They'll give you they'll give you something that

you want. Go straight to my vocal cords, and I'm able to talk normal for a few hours a day.

Listen to Bill right now. Listen to him.

I mean, listen to this. I'm running out. A little bit, but I'm on the fritz today because I've used most of my words up. But I I take a big sip of words, and planning and I'm able to speak pretty normally, and it really helps when I'm trying to sell smoothies and supplements.

Yes. People don't wanna buy a supplement from

yeah. Because I can say I can I can't say brown rice protein? Like, I can't I've ran out of normal words of that.

Right.

So that will come out crazy.

Yes. So there's certain words we need to hear a lot of. So if you have If you come say brown a bus, browse.

Brown rice, please.

Record yourself. You can do it in

pineapple chunks. I'm running low on. So if you can say that into a tub,

bCAA's? Yes. You know what?

Everybody, go to your local GNC. Grab every supplement, just read the ingredients into your phone, tweet the voice memo at us.

Yes. Yes.

And Bill will listen to it, and he'll recharge, and he should be

good. A few more for Bill. Siri don't answer that one. It's mom.

Yes. What do you mean? It's too watery. I need that. We You're closed. Yes. I'm closed. And then I they said, but you but we just you just opened.

I don't

know that I need.

Did you need to get I'm sorry. The customer's always right?

No. Okay. No. No. No. That I have plenty left.

Well, folks, come on down to the gym. Yeah. Can we decide on are we gonna reveal the new name today?

Yes. We or or or we could also Well,

we get we're gonna pull the

we could pull we could we could pull the members and do and do a Well,

we have a sheet over it now.

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Do or we don't?

Yeah. No.