Seekers' Lounge
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s11e02

Anklexander Hamilton

Originally aired: August 11, 2022

The Teachers discuss the new classes available at the 13th Street Fitness & Wellness Center.

0:00:30 Unknown Speaker #1

So these are all spalding microphones. They don't have these? Yeah.

0:00:34 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

0:00:35 Unknown Speaker #1

That'd be good.

0:00:36 Unknown Speaker #3

Pretty cool. They're really branching out into a lot of different things, other than basketball.

0:00:41 Unknown Speaker #2

I love it when a company realizes that their their market too narrow and they start making other crap. Like like when like when Polaris -- Uh-huh.

0:00:52 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:00:52 Unknown Speaker #2

they used to make CD dues and and all that kind of stuff, then they started making these land vehicles. Uh-huh. Yes. And I like I love it when a company just broadens their their market their market share. I don't know what the word is for their catalog.

0:01:04 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. I got hilarious shoes, and I just couldn't stay up on those.

0:01:08 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah.

0:01:08 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Couldn't stay up.

0:01:09 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, they're amphibious, which is nice.

0:01:10 Unknown Speaker #1

It's very nice. Because so are my feet.

0:01:13 Unknown Speaker #5

So Yeah. Nine wheels on a shoe. I mean, do you need it? Oh, are your feet still cold blooded?

0:01:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Cold blooded webbed amphibious. Wow. But the rest of my body isn't. So I it's a lot of temperature management. That's why you'll see my feet just chilling on a hot rock more than times, but my body's chilly.

0:01:30 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah.

0:01:31 Unknown Speaker #3

Speaking a hot rock, the terrarium is really popping off this week. Yeah. Yeah.

0:01:36 Unknown Speaker #5

It is. Had a big viewership.

0:01:38 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. You know, I'd like to think it's because of me, but I think it's because of Burverts? Well, I'm hoping. I know that there's a few, but I'm hoping that the majority of the people who are sort of partaking in in the observation of the terrarium are not just there because they're perverts. We do know a few of them are. And, you know, we try to weed them out. You know? We've we've sort of I do appreciate you guys working undercover in the crowd to try to find the perverts.

0:02:08 Unknown Speaker #1

And if people

0:02:09 Unknown Speaker #5

are just coming back to us, let's explain again what you're doing in the terrarium. It's you living -- because we know.

0:02:14 Unknown Speaker #3

are we recording? We know.

0:02:14 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:02:15 Unknown Speaker #1

Have we started the episode?

0:02:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Oh, see. Have have we Well,

0:02:19 Unknown Speaker #2

let's yes.

0:02:19 Unknown Speaker #1

Can we before we start? Could we just do a little I'm really trying to get my gym brain. You can always just do ten push ups before you do a thing -- Alright.

0:02:28 Unknown Speaker #2

So it's fine.

0:02:28 Unknown Speaker #1

before you rest in hard work.

0:02:28 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:02:29 Unknown Speaker #2

Everybody do ten real quick. Everybody just do ten real quick. Should we do them all at the same time or should we do them individually?

0:02:34 Unknown Speaker #5

Let's count all together.

0:02:35 Unknown Speaker #1

Let's all count together.

0:02:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Okay. Close our eyes.

0:02:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Okay. Eyes closed. What? Slow down. Hey. We gotta slow down.

0:02:46 Unknown Speaker #6

We gotta slow down. Three.

0:02:50 Unknown Speaker #1

How about two? Two?

0:02:53 Unknown Speaker #2

You can go down to your knees if you need

0:02:55 Unknown Speaker #3

to, Bob.

0:02:55 Unknown Speaker #1

I don't do lady push ups.

0:02:57 Unknown Speaker #5

They're knee push ups, Todd, we discussed this. They're knee push ups.

0:03:00 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Right. We know.

0:03:01 Unknown Speaker #3

And Can I go down to my waist?

0:03:04 Unknown Speaker #5

Of course. Okay. Just do the cobras.

0:03:06 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. I'm gonna do the cobras. Alright. Oh, this is a big bend in the back. I go onto my back? Yeah.

0:03:14 Unknown Speaker #2

I was gonna say, I was going on our back. It's going our back.

0:03:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We're

0:03:18 Unknown Speaker #3

up. Push up the air.

0:03:18 Unknown Speaker #2

just pushing

0:03:20 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Push up there.

0:03:21 Unknown Speaker #3

Bye. Oh.

0:03:24 Unknown Speaker #1

It's strong air today. It's a strong air today. I shoulder feels impinged by the air.

0:03:24 Unknown Speaker #5

Out of

0:03:24 Unknown Speaker #3

the air.

0:03:29 Unknown Speaker #2

I'm gonna go down to my knees on the air.

0:03:32 Unknown Speaker #5

A knees up back all the way down.

0:03:34 Unknown Speaker #1

That's the way we like to frown.

0:03:36 Unknown Speaker #5

Oh, yeah. We like to frown over

0:03:38 Unknown Speaker #3

with these socks.

0:03:40 Unknown Speaker #6

I'm frowning me. Now everybody nice big, frown on these.

0:03:44 Unknown Speaker #1

It's okay. I'm frowning up.

0:03:46 Unknown Speaker #3

Is there a way to get fungi, hydrogen in the air, so it's a little bit center.

0:03:49 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, let

0:03:50 Unknown Speaker #2

me turn on the hydrogen pump. Was that the right one? I hope.

0:03:57 Unknown Speaker #5

I think you

0:03:58 Unknown Speaker #3

have a little girl

0:03:58 Unknown Speaker #4

at the end of

0:03:59 Unknown Speaker #3

all the other age. Do the other age?

0:04:04 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, yeah.

0:04:05 Unknown Speaker #6

Oh, yeah. Turn down base. Speak at a base pump. Speak at a base pump. Oh, geez. Oh, when we're low, we can do them easier. There are ways you would rock us down.

0:04:22 Unknown Speaker #5

But so long inside. Oh.

0:04:30 Unknown Speaker #1

Long has returned the doll of it.

0:04:54 Unknown Speaker #5

That was a really great recommendation, Ted.

0:04:56 Unknown Speaker #1

That was awesome. I

0:04:57 Unknown Speaker #2

feel good. So Well,

0:04:58 Unknown Speaker #5

imagine if you did that

0:04:59 Unknown Speaker #1

before you do everything. You do ten push ups before you start your podcast. You do ten push ups before you get lunch. You do ten push ups before you go bad.

0:05:07 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. I think you're gonna get a little bit stronger.

0:05:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah. Thirty minutes.

0:05:11 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Absolutely. That's thirty extra push ups a day. Right? Thirty extra push ups a day

0:05:15 Unknown Speaker #1

every week twenty one extra hundred push ups a freaking month. Yeah. I think you're gonna get a lot stronger. Yeah. Totally.

0:05:21 Unknown Speaker #3

You add twenty one eight hundred hundred push ups a day. I think it's gonna work.

0:05:25 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah.

0:05:25 Unknown Speaker #2

Hey. Well, with that, why don't we get the grind?

0:05:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Wait. Wait. Before we start,

0:05:29 Unknown Speaker #2

Wait. Wait. Wait.

0:05:29 Unknown Speaker #5

you know what else that is?

0:05:30 Unknown Speaker #5

Just mindset. Mhmm. That's just mindset. My total.

0:05:33 Unknown Speaker #3

You just have to change your mindset. If you I mean, the the things we could do if we put our mind to it.

0:05:38 Unknown Speaker #5

That's true.

0:05:39 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. They're

0:05:40 Unknown Speaker #2

unbelievable. Unbelievable. But let's what do you say what do you say we hit it with the grind? Grind. Yeah. Rise and grind. Folks, Welcome to the teacher's lounge. At one time, it was the first on best and only podcast pertaining issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community.

0:05:58 Unknown Speaker #2

Now, Yeah. Absolute shit hole now. It's a podcast dedicated to your four favorite teachers and the thirteenth Street fitness center. Wellness center, which we have sort of taken over, sort of not even sort of all the way taken over in the last few months, and things are going great. I am of course Howard, Levis resident turtle, and previous biology teacher here with my three best friends.

0:05:58 Unknown Speaker #5

Sure.

0:06:22 Unknown Speaker #5

What's up, my name's Sam Weatherman. I am the personal trainer to the stars. I hope. Come on down to the thirteenth street fitness wellness center.

0:06:31 Unknown Speaker #3

Hello, Bill Cravey. I run the supplement and smoothie bar here at the thirteenth Street, Wellness and fitness center. Really, really got a lot of good stuff here. So stop by. Get yourself a little something before your workout and after.

0:06:45 Unknown Speaker #1

Todd Padre, student of men's bodies for my new play, what are men or what is men?

0:06:51 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Is it plural or is it singular?

0:06:56 Unknown Speaker #1

The name of the play or the title?

0:06:58 Unknown Speaker #1

you just throwing the question out?

0:06:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Or are

0:07:00 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Men, are or is.

0:07:03 Unknown Speaker #5

And what is the difference between the name of the play and the title? Are those

0:07:07 Unknown Speaker #1

the same

0:07:08 Unknown Speaker #1

That's a fantastic question which we cover in my again, if you if you have not seen my theater masterclass. It is all about questions like this. What's the way to play in the title? That's the first hour. Second hour theater, t h e a t r e or t a v h.

0:07:08 Unknown Speaker #5

or are those different?

0:07:29 Unknown Speaker #5

You have to start with clarity.

0:07:31 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:07:31 Unknown Speaker #5

Hundred percent.

0:07:32 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. You all have to be on the same page.

0:07:34 Unknown Speaker #2

Now Todd, how's it going trying to get that course on the actual masterclass website because I know you submitted Right.

0:07:34 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes.

0:07:40 Unknown Speaker #3

You haven't had many sign ups in the class pass area, which we're working with. We got all of our classes on class pass. So far, no one has signed up for

0:07:49 Unknown Speaker #1

so, yeah, I'm trying to be able to sign up at the gym so then I can tell masterclass, look how many people at the gym are coming to class.

0:07:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Right.

0:07:55 Unknown Speaker #1

Sadly, I had to restructure it because Bill Clinton's got a master class now and that covered a lot of my stuff. How to talk to Monica?

0:08:03 Unknown Speaker #3

Where to meet Monica?

0:08:04 Unknown Speaker #1

We're gonna meet Monica.

0:08:06 Unknown Speaker #5

Mhmm. Well, you're both professionals in the same field. Do I have?

0:08:10 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:08:11 Unknown Speaker #5

That happens.

0:08:12 Unknown Speaker #1

We both

0:08:12 Unknown Speaker #3

got we both got upset. True class is how to talk to Monica and where to meet Monica.

0:08:20 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, he's got like

0:08:21 Unknown Speaker #1

an addendum class that's lip bites and thumb pushes, which is a big technique for me if if anybody's trying to sell my -- Yeah. -- hamlet.

0:08:30 Unknown Speaker #2

You guys right.

0:08:31 Unknown Speaker #1

You know

0:08:31 Unknown Speaker #2

what I'm saying? Give yourself something to do. Buy your lip. Push your thumb. One of those two things.

0:08:35 Unknown Speaker #5

You need motivation. Yeah. If your lip's so inserting, you know why you're angry.

0:08:38 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Yeah. I cried through all of my handling performance.

0:08:43 Unknown Speaker #3

You were you you actually had to have a a lip graft. You've been through it pretty hard.

0:08:48 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. That's right. So we did the first ever public because I wanted everyone to learn from my experience. You know how some people you know, they'll do a live colonoscopy to get men to get colonoscopy and stuff. Right. I do a live

0:08:59 Unknown Speaker #5

which works for me. That that brings me

0:09:03 Unknown Speaker #3

oh, well, we were all like they were like, you have to get them. You're in your seventies. You're supposed to have this done in your late forties, and we were like, okay. Well, as soon as it you feel the the

0:09:13 Unknown Speaker #5

as soon as you see it once live at Madison Square Garden,

0:09:16 Unknown Speaker #3

you're gonna wanna go. If you feel the state the the Bank of America Hamilton arena with a live one will be there.

0:09:24 Unknown Speaker #1

That's right.

0:09:24 Unknown Speaker #2

Thank you so much for Wayne Wayne Brady for coming down and performing.

0:09:29 Unknown Speaker #5

You can do a colonoscopy, honestly, with anything. Well, we gave

0:09:32 Unknown Speaker #3

him yeah. We gave him a suggestion. And he did a colonoscopy for us.

0:09:38 Unknown Speaker #5

He did one of the pool noodle look straight through the middle of

0:09:41 Unknown Speaker #1

the afternoon. It was hilarious. Did colonoscopy hoe down, which I love. Yes. And and and we had such a good time. We all immediately went to the pharmacy and we bought a colonoscopy drink. And we all just hit did a buddy's drink together.

0:09:54 Unknown Speaker #1

And I I do two of those a morning now and it just clears you out and you're ready for camera or your colon is.

0:09:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:10:00 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Yeah. Well Camera ready, colon.

0:10:04 Unknown Speaker #3

How long does it take your colon to go through hair and make over me? And did it have to get and you're fitting what took a while for your colon the other way.

0:10:17 Unknown Speaker #1

It's an early call time for sure. My colon's up at the crack of dawn. No pun intended. Yeah. It rivals Jim Carrie getting into the Grinch costume. It's about eight hours.

0:10:31 Unknown Speaker #5

Forced and it's green.

0:10:33 Unknown Speaker #1

I know it's green. Yeah. That's what they to get it out of.

0:10:36 Unknown Speaker #3

Did they force your assholes call the other day and had to work a double?

0:10:40 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. It was a forced call, which I've been talking to the union about.

0:10:45 Unknown Speaker #3

Crap. Appoonian. Appoonian. Well, that's great.

0:10:56 Unknown Speaker #5

C o two.

0:11:00 Unknown Speaker #6

Well, we got him in all the gym room,

0:11:01 Unknown Speaker #3

by the way. Oh, yeah.

0:11:03 Unknown Speaker #5

Of course.

0:11:03 Unknown Speaker #3

How long Yeah.

0:11:04 Unknown Speaker #1

We haven't I mean, we've been doing pretty great.

0:11:06 Unknown Speaker #2

It's been surprising. All all the projections, you know, we had a business plan coming into this. We did all of our due diligence. We decided how What would a success look like for us coming into this? And we thought, you know, making our investment back in five years. We were thinking on that kinda horizon.

0:11:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:11:23 Unknown Speaker #2

But it's in the last few months, We've we've already

0:11:27 Unknown Speaker #3

unfortunately, we have reached capacity. We are at capacity. And we're trying to figure out ways to get more members in here. There's of course, some room upstairs that we're we're trying to take over. We've been talking to the tenants upstairs and seeing if we could get some of that room.

0:11:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Yeah. That's a non profit. Yeah. Yes.

0:11:49 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. It's a non profit and an orphanage upstairs.

0:11:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. And we've I think we've priced them out. We've been talking to landlord and undercutting them, but I think we priced them out pretty well.

0:11:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We can we can evict them.

0:12:01 Unknown Speaker #2

But people are shocked by the success we've found because because honestly, I guess our reputation around town is that we're not the most savvy businessman or savvy.

0:12:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Course, sort

0:12:10 Unknown Speaker #2

of people. But but something about the way we're running this place is just attracting a very specific type of of, well, man with expendable income and time to blow because these guys are here and they are pumping all day

0:12:25 Unknown Speaker #5

and I think we're finding that as long as you cut the right corners

0:12:28 Unknown Speaker #4

-- Yes. --

0:12:29 Unknown Speaker #5

people don't care. Yes. People that come to the gym want certain things. They want nice equipment. They want nice place to go. Yeah. Do they care about a smile when you enter? No. No. Do they care about, like, real cleanliness?

0:12:43 Unknown Speaker #3

No. No.

0:12:44 Unknown Speaker #1

No. No.

0:12:45 Unknown Speaker #2

No. Absolutely not. Do you they they care about having a first aid kit anywhere? No. Not at all. Nobody cares about that stuff.

0:12:52 Unknown Speaker #1

That's what the damn paramedics are for.

0:12:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Exactly. Exactly. What do we pay them for? What are we paying for? If we're gonna put the gauze on, if somebody drops a weight on their foot,

0:13:01 Unknown Speaker #3

which Yeah. And we've got a bulletproof contract that everybody has to sign when they sign up.

0:13:08 Unknown Speaker #2

We we know responsibility.

0:13:08 Unknown Speaker #1

You work out at your

0:13:08 Unknown Speaker #3

own risk.

0:13:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Yeah. No. We we took everything you see in the world and we put it in the contract as far as risk. So

0:13:19 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:13:19 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm. -- you park in the parking lot, we're not response for your valuables at all. No. The lockers were not responsible. We're no one stealing them.

0:13:26 Unknown Speaker #5

We employ these. We employ these.

0:13:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Of course, you have to.

0:13:29 Unknown Speaker #3

You have to.

0:13:29 Unknown Speaker #6

You have to.

0:13:30 Unknown Speaker #3

You have everybody on this be responsible. And so we have petty thefts around petty thieves.

0:13:36 Unknown Speaker #1

They are so petty. One of them came up to me. He's like, I think you still owe me three months from a couple months ago.

0:13:40 Unknown Speaker #2

I was

0:13:41 Unknown Speaker #5

like, dude. Come on, dude. I'm sure I got to a coffee too.

0:13:44 Unknown Speaker #1

Stowel then, yeah, man, for my pocket. Yeah. I bought him several coffees.

0:13:48 Unknown Speaker #1

But he was like, well, yeah. But I I remember I paid for half of that hundred percent all be frank

0:13:48 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes.

0:13:52 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:13:53 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah. -- at the Jackass movie.

0:13:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Apparently, I broke in front of one of the thieves mom at a movie at the popcorn line, he robbed the shit out of

0:14:01 Unknown Speaker #1

him. Patty.

0:14:02 Unknown Speaker #5

Patty. Patty. Patty. Patty. Patty.

0:14:03 Unknown Speaker #3

Patty. Patty. Patty.

0:14:06 Unknown Speaker #1

I I think the thing I'm the proud stuff though

0:14:08 Unknown Speaker #3

yeah.

0:14:08 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:14:09 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:14:09 Unknown Speaker #1

is the bathrooms. And then the locker rooms

0:14:13 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah. -- and just how immaculate they are. Yeah.

0:14:13 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:14:16 Unknown Speaker #5

Class class class.

0:14:17 Unknown Speaker #1

It's all class in there. You can there's a lot of locker room space

0:14:21 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:14:21 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm. -- so you're not stuffing your stuff.

0:14:24 Unknown Speaker #5

Some of our most popular classes are in there. Mhmm. We have a shower class.

0:14:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Shaw well, you have to learn to shower.

0:14:30 Unknown Speaker #5

You have

0:14:30 Unknown Speaker #3

to I don't know. Shower class is booked.

0:14:35 Unknown Speaker #2

And then and I think this is honestly the secret to how we've made this gym so successful is that in this gym, you pay for everything. You don't get to just take a shower. You it's a part of a class. No. Or if you've already taken the class, you get special access to the second tier shower, that costs a little bit extra.

0:14:51 Unknown Speaker #1

You can test into the second tier shower. Yes. You can. We have to watch your shower

0:14:55 Unknown Speaker #2

and make sure

0:14:55 Unknown Speaker #1

you have to test out a shower one.

0:14:57 Unknown Speaker #5

And for ease of use, everything is quarter based.

0:15:00 Unknown Speaker #5

you wanna go to a class, you just take one of the quarters out of your jingly pocket. Yep. And then you drop the quarter in.

0:15:00 Unknown Speaker #2

Yep. So if

0:15:05 Unknown Speaker #3

And wait. To sell big huge quarter bags

0:15:08 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #3

at the front.

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #5

yes.

0:15:10 Unknown Speaker #3

You have to have a big sack

0:15:10 Unknown Speaker #5

Of course.

0:15:12 Unknown Speaker #1

of quarters.

0:15:13 Unknown Speaker #5

You just have to have that at the gym.

0:15:15 Unknown Speaker #3

What the lat pull down machine is a dollar twenty five. You get eight pulls for a dollar twenty five.

0:15:22 Unknown Speaker #1

For a pound.

0:15:23 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, if you come on the right day, you can get really butts because all the coins are in the waitstaff. If you come right after we clear -- Yeah.

0:15:30 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:15:30 Unknown Speaker #5

sure you're only gonna be able to do a ten pound lap pull down.

0:15:33 Unknown Speaker #5

You know what I mean?

0:15:33 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:15:34 Unknown Speaker #1

But and so that's you you can base the time of day based on how ugly and weak your lats are. If you're big, tall, buff lats like me and the guy in the Northman, then you can do You

0:15:43 Unknown Speaker #5

guys are the same look.

0:15:45 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, I've been going for that look ever since I saw the trailer. So, yeah, nice buff, huge lats, big beautiful, awesome body. Mhmm. I'm really studying this like men's form for the for my play.

0:15:57 Unknown Speaker #1

And I'm seeing how you can look how you want to. I spent my whole life thinking forced to look the way I look. Yeah. You

0:15:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Fascinating.

0:16:03 Unknown Speaker #5

know who else did that that you remind me of, Todd? DaVinci. DaVinci studied the mail for -- Yes.

0:16:09 Unknown Speaker #5

figure out how it moved. That classic

0:16:09 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:16:12 Unknown Speaker #2

picture of the man with his arms out. Exactly.

0:16:14 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah, man with his arms out in the circle and all the lines No. That's how that is. Shit like that all sorts of times. Yeah. I have an idea what it means. But, yeah, just like because I you know, we're all ugly, but you don't have to be is what I'm learning.

0:16:30 Unknown Speaker #2

No. Right?

0:16:31 Unknown Speaker #1

I'm really sculpting myself.

0:16:32 Unknown Speaker #2

Isn't it funny how the ugly is face on the most beautiful body you don't even look at their face?

0:16:37 Unknown Speaker #5

Bezos. Exactly.

0:16:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Bezos. Exactly, Bezos.

0:16:39 Unknown Speaker #5

Look at Bezos. Look at Bezos. Everybody wants to fuck Hey, so Everybody, despite his head.

0:16:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Despite his head. Worst head on the planet, but he keeps the rest of it tight.

0:16:50 Unknown Speaker #5

Mhmm. And it's good to get buff in your fifth Mhmm.

0:16:53 Unknown Speaker #1

It's good to start your workout plan in your fifties.

0:16:57 Unknown Speaker #5

So anybody listening and you think you're way over the hill and all you have is money, but nobody Come get buff.

0:17:02 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We're looking to get We're looking to get old man ripped tummy. You you you guys know that. It's a hard weird tummy, weird belly button.

0:17:13 Unknown Speaker #2

Some people and some people who are younger can sometimes achieve old man rip bodies. So Joe rogan, I think, has classic old man ripped body and then, like, a younger man's body.

0:17:23 Unknown Speaker #5

And the big change is your eight pack goes from eight to two.

0:17:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Yep. You

0:17:27 Unknown Speaker #5

just become really buff and you have two parts in the stomach, and that's all you really need.

0:17:31 Unknown Speaker #1

If you wanna do it the rogan way, we can do it. You're cutting some corners, which again we're not afraid to do. But -- Right.

0:17:36 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:17:37 Unknown Speaker #1

we'll have to pump you up creatine and rage. And then you have to it's a lot of alcohol and cocaine

0:17:43 Unknown Speaker #1

we can get to that.

0:17:43 Unknown Speaker #2

and

0:17:44 Unknown Speaker #5

And for every body percent that you want to lose in fact, you unfortunately have to take an inch off of your height.

0:17:50 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm.

0:17:51 Unknown Speaker #5

So obviously, for him to get really ripped, he had to become four foot pounds.

0:17:54 Unknown Speaker #1

Specifically your neck. Is there what your neck does kinda go into your body a little bit? That's right. And that's looking for. Buff you are, which is what men should look like.

0:18:02 Unknown Speaker #5

It's really important to be able to kick in modern sorry. It's really important to

0:18:07 Unknown Speaker #1

be able to kick someone

0:18:08 Unknown Speaker #5

on the street as hard as

0:18:10 Unknown Speaker #3

you can. Yeah. If you can't kick someone in the neck, And you're six years.

0:18:17 Unknown Speaker #5

How are you gonna protect yourself on the street? Like, everybody knows when you're sixty, you have fat wallet.

0:18:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. If you So you'd better roundhouse somebody at the auntie Anne's counter if they step in front of you. What are you doing?

0:18:29 Unknown Speaker #5

What is your priorities are on.

0:18:31 Unknown Speaker #1

Because if you can't if you know in your heart that you can't kick somebody in the face, then you're not willing to fly off the handle at this drop of time. You have to build your body in a way that you will freak out the second somebody

0:18:43 Unknown Speaker #3

if somebody gives you a weird look, at a sandwich shop. If you can't put them in a pretzel immediately and make them scream uncle in front of their family, what are you doing? And if

0:18:54 Unknown Speaker #5

and if you don't have the business acumen then sell that pretzel to auntie Ann's, you're also a loser. If you don't,

0:19:03 Unknown Speaker #3

beat the hell out of somebody, take their merchandise and sell it for dollars on the penny.

0:19:08 Unknown Speaker #2

Dollars on the penny?

0:19:10 Unknown Speaker #3

Dollars on the penny.

0:19:11 Unknown Speaker #5

That side of the business you wanna be on.

0:19:13 Unknown Speaker #1

But I I I I am so proud of my friends. We thought we had to be teachers. We did we spent our whole lives trying to do good for others. Mhmm. And where did it get us? Jail humiliated -- Hell, yes.

0:19:24 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:19:25 Unknown Speaker #3

jail held literally in the mall.

0:19:27 Unknown Speaker #5

The mall other seasons.

0:19:31 Unknown Speaker #1

We're working on ourselves. Yes. And we're saying, this is for us. If you wanna be like us come here, if you don't want to

0:19:37 Unknown Speaker #3

yes.

0:19:37 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:19:37 Unknown Speaker #1

we'll see you in what what what not in heaven because that's where we'll be, but you'll

0:19:41 Unknown Speaker #5

be in Right. And it's so

0:19:42 Unknown Speaker #3

nice too. Because, obviously, when we were teachers, that the the passion ended at four thirty PM or three thirty PM.

0:19:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Which is also what it said on my reason for divorce.

0:19:56 Unknown Speaker #3

The day of your wedding.

0:19:59 Unknown Speaker #1

The passion ended at four thirty PM. Yes.

0:20:02 Unknown Speaker #3

And then followed by the death of passion is gonna be the reception. Right? Yeah. There was it was on your invite. Death of passion.

0:20:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. We From fourth from three thirty to four thirty. We brought a doctor in, and he looked at our relationship. He's a time of death, four thirty, and everything.

0:20:17 Unknown Speaker #3

I saw him. Put a two fingers on you two holding hands and then look at his watch and call and call you out.

0:20:26 Unknown Speaker #5

That was one of the most professional ceremonies I've ever been.

0:20:29 Unknown Speaker #1

That was my idea.

0:20:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh my god.

0:20:33 Unknown Speaker #5

Todd, you are so on That's so brave. Most men would go to the grave lying saying they love their wife. You just immediately.

0:20:42 Unknown Speaker #3

Most Smith would never tell the truth about loving their wife. You can put them on as many lie detectors as you want. They're gonna fool them all. They will go to the grave lying about love rather than heaven on this conversation.

0:20:58 Unknown Speaker #1

First day, you admit

0:20:59 Unknown Speaker #5

it and you say, hey, now we know what we have to work from.

0:21:01 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. God. And yeah. So that everybody does in ceremony after that's a passion.

0:21:05 Unknown Speaker #5

Now we know where we have to work from. Passion's gone.

0:21:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. And and it's nice to when you get off work, when you clock out, you're still obsessed with what you're doing during the day. I don't ever clock out. I'm always working. I'm always researching. I'm always finding out what's the new trend in the supplements? Can we figure out a way to get people's water weight down? Is there a new diet craze going on? What's happening? Are vegetables actually good for you. We don't know. We don't know any of this stuff.

0:21:37 Unknown Speaker #1

I haven't seen you this manically passionate about everything in such a long time.

0:21:41 Unknown Speaker #3

Is thirty minutes a day of feeding enough? Right. Feeding. Feeding. Yeah. A feeding window of thirty minutes a day. Right. I am messing around with intermittent fasting, full fasting forever, all these things. All these things.

0:21:56 Unknown Speaker #2

I thought

0:21:57 Unknown Speaker #1

you I was ever

0:21:58 Unknown Speaker #3

that's fully fussy forever?

0:22:00 Unknown Speaker #2

The the the press presentation that you gave last week was incredible about FFF.

0:22:06 Unknown Speaker #3

I really appreciate that. And, you know, We did have a lot of people in their chairs asleep falling over.

0:22:13 Unknown Speaker #5

Damn. But the presentation was good.

0:22:15 Unknown Speaker #3

The orientation was so good.

0:22:16 Unknown Speaker #1

Also, you a little sleepy. I'm I'm

0:22:21 Unknown Speaker #3

frustrated. I was losing my place quite a bit. Mhmm. But that is your body eating away at the facts. And you gotta

0:22:29 Unknown Speaker #2

and you gotta push past that difficulty. Right?

0:22:32 Unknown Speaker #3

That's the

0:22:32 Unknown Speaker #2

lesson to be learned from this f f f f situation

0:22:36 Unknown Speaker #2

is that you have to push through the discomfort, and on the other side of that discomfort is euphoric.

0:22:36 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:22:36 Unknown Speaker #1

yes.

0:22:41 Unknown Speaker #3

Of course, it's gonna be terrible for the first two weeks a year ever. Like, it's gonna be rough. But we have to push these things. And you can tell by how I look right now, a little bit green, but shredded

0:22:55 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:22:55 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm.

0:22:55 Unknown Speaker #3

that things are going really good for FFM.

0:22:58 Unknown Speaker #5

And you've learned that with the right breathing techniques, you can sustain without food or water.

0:23:04 Unknown Speaker #3

Absolutely. And and we've learned that right now we're finding out that you don't even really need vegetables. Yeah. This is a thing that's been sold to us by farmers.

0:23:15 Unknown Speaker #3

out to get us big what? Big veggies? Big

0:23:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Farmers are

0:23:18 Unknown Speaker #5

fed, big pharma?

0:23:20 Unknown Speaker #3

Big farmer.

0:23:20 Unknown Speaker #2

Big farmer.

0:23:21 Unknown Speaker #2

I believe we yeah. Big farmer is a thing we've talked about before.

0:23:23 Unknown Speaker #3

And and we've been subsidizing these lazy men and overalls for so long. Yes. And we thank you

0:23:30 Unknown Speaker #2

for saying it out loud,

0:23:31 Unknown Speaker #5

so thank

0:23:32 Unknown Speaker #3

for saying it out loud. They're shoving this grain down our throat. Oh, we gotta have corn. We gotta have this. We gotta have that. That's the person headed out right now.

0:23:32 Unknown Speaker #2

you

0:23:42 Unknown Speaker #2

They're headed out. They're headed out. They're headed out.

0:23:45 Unknown Speaker #5

That's what about.

0:23:46 Unknown Speaker #2

Head it out. Why?

0:23:46 Unknown Speaker #1

What can I ask? Ninety three. We have another person headed out. Don't stop your workout. It's okay.

0:23:54 Unknown Speaker #5

And that's right. This does go out live in the gym as we record it. Oh, yes. It's the perfect thing to work out.

0:24:00 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. We hijack into everybody's Bluetooth This is wide open in their ear right now.

0:24:04 Unknown Speaker #5

And you control of

0:24:06 Unknown Speaker #5

what's in it and the volume.

0:24:06 Unknown Speaker #1

the

0:24:08 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, yeah. We pack it wide open. Everybody every wave to us at the gym. Always.

0:24:13 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, wait. Everybody's good to love.

0:24:15 Unknown Speaker #3

Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. I'm I'm I'm tired of these farmers.

0:24:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm. And I love seeing you this way, Bill. Mhmm. I love seeing you put because you are so smart, but you just it's hard to find something you care about. And you clearly have passion

0:24:31 Unknown Speaker #3

but you've never been passion. It's it's always I've always had unaimed.

0:24:31 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:24:31 Unknown Speaker #3

yes.

0:24:36 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, you

0:24:36 Unknown Speaker #5

don't know why we're divorced.

0:24:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, you're a person who you have these fits and starts, where there'll be a moment where you get

0:24:41 Unknown Speaker #1

pieces of fits.

0:24:42 Unknown Speaker #2

What I would really love to see from here.

0:24:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Right before I start.

0:24:44 Unknown Speaker #2

What I'd love to see from you here, Bill, is I feel like there's been so many times where you've gotten just absolutely obsessed with something, and then you've just dropped Like Why? I think what I need for you here what I want for you in this first moment here is I want for you for you for the first time in your whole life to really commit to this. And I want this to

0:25:03 Unknown Speaker #3

be your lifestyle. For once in my life, I'm not looking for other people's approval I am come it's coming from the inside out. It's all about what's deep inside of me coming out. You know? And we don't need vegetables. And we don't need all we need is meat and liver and kidneys uncooked and

0:25:25 Unknown Speaker #5

it's a revolution.

0:25:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Now hang on. Is that part of the f f f

0:25:30 Unknown Speaker #3

well, this is different. F f f, I'm I'm trying out f f f every lifestyle is not for everyone. And f f f is not for you. If you're passing out at work, if you're dying, if you're if you're, like, if you're dying in the hallway -- Mhmm.

0:25:44 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:25:44 Unknown Speaker #3

as you walk to the bathroom at night. It's not for everyone. We're doing high iron diets.

0:25:49 Unknown Speaker #1

That's awesome.

0:25:50 Unknown Speaker #3

We're doing no water. Mhmm. We're cutting out water.

0:25:54 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, so much weight is water weight. Yeah.

0:25:56 Unknown Speaker #3

So much weight is water weight. And I have been this week, figuring out ways to not breathe. Because I don't know if we actually need this. Big ops has been constantly being like, hey, we're running out of this stuff. Trees make it. We gotta plant trees. I just don't buy any of

0:26:15 Unknown Speaker #6

it. Right.

0:26:15 Unknown Speaker #5

You're gonna be scared. You have

0:26:16 Unknown Speaker #3

to follow the money. Mhmm.

0:26:18 Unknown Speaker #1

That's a very excellent point.

0:26:20 Unknown Speaker #5

Who and and who gets paid off of everybody thinking they need to breathe? Mhmm. Oxy bars. Vegas

0:26:27 Unknown Speaker #3

oxygen bar is what you have to follow. Huge.

0:26:29 Unknown Speaker #5

Everybody knows why you go to Vegas. I've always been bar.

0:26:32 Unknown Speaker #3

I've always yelled at those guys. What is this bullshit? What is this crap? Right. We have it. We we're we're breathing it. And do we really need it?

0:26:42 Unknown Speaker #3

get hooked up to one of those things. And then when I get off of it, I'll fall in the little canal at Caesar's

0:26:42 Unknown Speaker #1

Because I'll

0:26:47 Unknown Speaker #5

well, you know, when you're so young, I'm not sure I would eat or breathe if I wasn't hot it by my parents. Yeah. Way. They tell us.

0:26:55 Unknown Speaker #3

It's in a doctorate t

0:26:57 Unknown Speaker #1

shirt trauma. It's learned trauma.

0:26:58 Unknown Speaker #5

It is traumatic. It's abusive to make me eat and breathe. Yes. I am suing the doctor that spanked my butt to start me grieving.

0:27:06 Unknown Speaker #1

That's great. And and in that trial, That trial has been fascinating. I mean, we're just in the discovery phase, of course, right

0:27:12 Unknown Speaker #5

now. Mhmm.

0:27:13 Unknown Speaker #1

But we've got, you know, you get the mark on your butt that you're entering of where when slap happened according to you.

0:27:19 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes.

0:27:20 Unknown Speaker #3

A little bit of nose trauma from the little snot sucker that you're going after them.

0:27:24 Unknown Speaker #5

A little bit of nose trauma. Are you

0:27:25 Unknown Speaker #3

kidding me?

0:27:26 Unknown Speaker #5

My left nostril huge. That's from that's from sucker.

0:27:26 Unknown Speaker #1

No.

0:27:30 Unknown Speaker #3

That's from nose sucker. That's from snot sucker

0:27:32 Unknown Speaker #1

up top. You you do have a case because I I've seen the video. And he he did he wound up before he slept. Geez.

0:27:40 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, we've all seen the billboards around town, one of our good friends. It's a little baby's butt. It's red. It's got a hand on it, and there's a doctor in the shadow. And it's called one eight hundred, go fuck yourself, dog.

0:27:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. We put together a class action because we didn't we didn't ask for this. We didn't ask to breathe. I'm suing my mom.

0:27:59 Unknown Speaker #1

Good. Final.

0:28:00 Unknown Speaker #5

File is I did how do you know I wanted to latch? Maybe I was just gonna go with meth.

0:28:05 Unknown Speaker #3

You're obsessed with bottles to this day.

0:28:08 Unknown Speaker #5

Oh my god. I eat out of bottles. Isn't that crazy? Not drink?

0:28:12 Unknown Speaker #3

No. He eats

0:28:13 Unknown Speaker #5

i stuff my sandwich into the butt end of a bottle, and then I

0:28:16 Unknown Speaker #1

squeeze it through a nipple.

0:28:18 Unknown Speaker #3

He has to suck so hard.

0:28:21 Unknown Speaker #5

I'm obsessed. It's because of my stinky mom and that mean doctor, I can't stop

0:28:26 Unknown Speaker #3

you because we don't it's just we're really breaking down what has been told to us and what has been sold to us over the years and getting rid everything we don't need. That's really what wellness is all about.

0:28:39 Unknown Speaker #2

Shitting we're shedding ours our own personal skins through this process.

0:28:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Because literally, we we Think about the cavemen.

0:28:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. I always do.

0:28:48 Unknown Speaker #3

The cavemen didn't have oxygen water or food. Like, they

0:28:52 Unknown Speaker #1

had to fight they had to fight with lions and dinosaurs all day. And you think that and they're working on their beautiful art on the walls.

0:28:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Which. We have do we have been in the basement, we have been figuring out ways to bring back dinosaurs

0:29:08 Unknown Speaker #3

and prehistoric creatures sort of That's part of Jim. We'll talk about this

0:29:08 Unknown Speaker #1

right.

0:29:08 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:29:12 Unknown Speaker #1

on air.

0:29:13 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, you know, I didn't want to because it's a little early, but I wanna put the pressure on us to deliver.

0:29:19 Unknown Speaker #3

soon as you get the news out there, you can kind of reverse engineer some press because you

0:29:19 Unknown Speaker #1

Because as

0:29:23 Unknown Speaker #5

know what nobody talks about with these sort of early era man and how they eat. These guys are ripped. Yeah. These guys are ripped, and they knew what was the most important part of life. Yeah. The way you look on a post

0:29:34 Unknown Speaker #3

office. Yes. Yeah. They

0:29:35 Unknown Speaker #1

look so good on both sides.

0:29:36 Unknown Speaker #5

And

0:29:36 Unknown Speaker #2

that's and and and interestingly, I obviously, everybody knows my situation. I'm, of course, living in a terrarium in the old rack a ball course. Yeah.

0:29:44 Unknown Speaker #3

It's very clear.

0:29:45 Unknown Speaker #2

That we have sort of turned into a a sort of habitat, if you will, for for my man. And I

0:29:51 Unknown Speaker #1

it's habitat for How Manity.

0:29:52 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Exactly. How Manity? That's the name of the

0:29:56 Unknown Speaker #3

i think that could go

0:29:57 Unknown Speaker #2

Demonstration -- Yes.

0:29:57 Unknown Speaker #5

to Vegas.

0:29:58 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:29:59 Unknown Speaker #2

called humanity now. And and we have, of course,

0:30:02 Unknown Speaker #3

certain It's really studying, but how do men do it. Well, amenity.

0:30:08 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, Howard, also, it's a play on everything.

0:30:10 Unknown Speaker #3

It's a play on

0:30:11 Unknown Speaker #2

it's a play

0:30:12 Unknown Speaker #1

on everything. Think of something.

0:30:14 Unknown Speaker #3

It's a play on it.

0:30:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. And we're not sure yet if this is the title or the name of the piece. Right.

0:30:21 Unknown Speaker #2

We don't we don't know yet.

0:30:22 Unknown Speaker #5

We don't have.

0:30:23 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, we have title words.

0:30:24 Unknown Speaker #3

We haven't take touch after he teaches us how to lather on lotion, which you're teaching that in the locker room.

0:30:29 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. That one's a long one. It's whole body slowly in front of the mirror that everyone can see.

0:30:35 Unknown Speaker #2

But as as everybody knows, we start I started this this situation, I'll call it, this show, this this peace

0:30:41 Unknown Speaker #5

mhmm.

0:30:41 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:30:42 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:30:42 Unknown Speaker #2

to sort of confront my personal shame about my life to keep me in a constant state of observation so there was I couldn't hide anything from anyone.

0:30:50 Unknown Speaker #5

And you have to live in a house. Yeah.

0:30:51 Unknown Speaker #3

What's that?

0:30:52 Unknown Speaker #5

People always wanted to live in a house with walls.

0:30:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, yeah.

0:30:55 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. You're like, you were a man of meager means

0:30:57 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:30:58 Unknown Speaker #3

yes. -- meager means. And You you do you have a clown guru? Is that true that's working on your show with you, how Manity?

0:31:07 Unknown Speaker #2

I'd well, I have I have a a person who I have sort of tapped for notes and sort

0:31:13 Unknown Speaker #1

right.

0:31:13 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:31:13 Unknown Speaker #2

sort of adjustments, which, of course, the big note was, I think, we should go a little

0:31:18 Unknown Speaker #3

is this an old French man with a bad attitude?

0:31:20 Unknown Speaker #2

It is an old French man

0:31:21 Unknown Speaker #1

with a

0:31:21 Unknown Speaker #2

bad attitude.

0:31:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Okay.

0:31:23 Unknown Speaker #2

And ripped me off.

0:31:26 Unknown Speaker #1

You ripped up my

0:31:27 Unknown Speaker #5

whole personality. You know what I mean?

0:31:29 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, his his And

0:31:30 Unknown Speaker #5

are you getting residuals? Probably not.

0:31:32 Unknown Speaker #1

I wish I opened my mail every day.

0:31:35 Unknown Speaker #5

Me too, Tom. I'll talk to

0:31:36 Unknown Speaker #3

you and your neighbor's mail.

0:31:38 Unknown Speaker #1

I've got it.

0:31:40 Unknown Speaker #2

You think the mailman missed He missed your mailbox, put it in your neighbors?

0:31:44 Unknown Speaker #1

I mean, we've gotten into enough arguments that he might be trying to fuck me. Yeah. Because, you know, I tried to bite my mailman like a dog? Do we need to to deal with this recently? Well, I

0:31:54 Unknown Speaker #3

was I was I was back in the mail.

0:31:56 Unknown Speaker #1

That's nice. But how how how are You're being trained by

0:32:00 Unknown Speaker #2

this French man. And his big note for me was was I think we need to take this a little bit more primal, a little bit more primitive. Which is interesting because it's kind of -- Wow.

0:32:08 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:32:08 Unknown Speaker #2

it's kind of this interesting kind of synergy again in the in the gym where I have taken to not wearing sort of standard human clothing. Yeah.

0:32:18 Unknown Speaker #5

Loyn or less.

0:32:19 Unknown Speaker #2

Loyn or less. His big note was Loyn or less.

0:32:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Loyn leaning towards this. But loin.

0:32:23 Unknown Speaker #1

But it's also it's also his order at a steak restaurant. Yes. We're trying to get fit.

0:32:29 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. We're trying to get

0:32:30 Unknown Speaker #3

set the cheapest order, we'll take the loin or less.

0:32:36 Unknown Speaker #2

But so I have, of course, ditched clothes.

0:32:39 Unknown Speaker #2

I'm I'm only sort of I'm living similarly.

0:32:39 Unknown Speaker #1

Can we?

0:32:43 Unknown Speaker #1

Can we, you know, through some of your some of your kind of animalistic stuff that you're working on. Yeah.

0:32:48 Unknown Speaker #6

Absolutely. Because, you know, people

0:32:49 Unknown Speaker #1

have gotten to watch it, but we haven't had it on the pod yet. Yeah. And you're a friend of the pod. And so

0:32:54 Unknown Speaker #3

i have a hosted by. Well, you're a friend of it.

0:32:58 Unknown Speaker #2

Not for a living son

0:33:00 Unknown Speaker #1

how we're lovers here. I think

0:33:01 Unknown Speaker #5

we're thinking about making your house. So far, you're a friend. You've been

0:33:03 Unknown Speaker #3

the man guest we've had on every episode, and we love you as a guest. And we've had you back every episode. Seriously, you are

0:33:09 Unknown Speaker #1

already about Howard Love us here again today, folks.

0:33:13 Unknown Speaker #3

We love him. You always love him. We love we love

0:33:16 Unknown Speaker #5

how he intros the show. Our guest our guest has been introed the show from the get go and he's been such a wonderful guest.

0:33:24 Unknown Speaker #1

We'll bump you. It's a contract thing. We'll bump you once we can, but you're locked in for thirty seasons of the guest. So then we'll see.

0:33:29 Unknown Speaker #5

But And seasons is not yours. Yes.

0:33:31 Unknown Speaker #3

Decreasing pay every single price, which you agreed to.

0:33:35 Unknown Speaker #1

But so how how we I wanted, like, do some of this primal stuff. I wanna see you be primal because

0:33:42 Unknown Speaker #3

the return to man.

0:33:43 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, the the most the most interesting thing, which I was honestly when my mentor, sort of, introduced this idea. The thing I was most freaked out by was if you guys in Jurassic Park speaking of dinosaurs, you guys you guys seen the scene where they sort of lower the goat in on the crane. Of course, yes.

0:34:00 Unknown Speaker #1

I lived here.

0:34:06 Unknown Speaker #5

And we all know what Todd's talking about. But just to clarify Todd,

0:34:10 Unknown Speaker #3

every time Todd has A stroke, a heart attack, falls down, breaks his hip, they lift him up, all fours out of a sling. And sort of pull him with a helicopter and lower him into the hospital.

0:34:27 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, first, they take him to dress

0:34:29 Unknown Speaker #5

a car. They try to lure him in.

0:34:31 Unknown Speaker #3

That no. The dinosaurs are like yucky enough.

0:34:33 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. They want you

0:34:33 Unknown Speaker #5

to sort of bat them around for a second.

0:34:35 Unknown Speaker #1

I've been spit out by a t rex. I've been spit out by a raptor. I've been spit out by crazy hair that's spit on new men.

0:34:43 Unknown Speaker #5

I don't think it's crazy hair, but I do think I do think this is your best shot at residuals though. If you keep doing this, you may end up in a movie.

0:34:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Good luck. Getting Spielberg on the line. Damn anti semite. I'll tell you that much right now.

0:34:56 Unknown Speaker #5

I don't know. I'm not sure.

0:34:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, yeah. I got a list. I wanna put you on Spielberg. A list of anti semites. Howard, I do want us to to to be a little bit primal here. I'm working on this in my Play, which I brought up with it several times, everyone's gotta come see it. Mhmm. What is men? Or what are men? What is Howard, you got we need to see your animal self. Give me a growl.

0:35:23 Unknown Speaker #5

That was okay. That was okay. That was almost like the beginning

0:35:27 Unknown Speaker #1

of that blur song.

0:35:28 Unknown Speaker #5

That one.

0:35:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Raha. Yeah.

0:35:33 Unknown Speaker #5

That's close. That's cool. It's tough.

0:35:34 Unknown Speaker #2

It's just not in me right now, but

0:35:36 Unknown Speaker #6

come a good growling. Be made Powered.

0:35:39 Unknown Speaker #3

Howard. When

0:35:40 Unknown Speaker #1

you grow out, you said cowwered.

0:35:44 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, try it again. Just say the first thing that comes to you, scrape like growl just go ahead. One, two, three. You just said hat. You said hat and you held up a sign that said, please help me. That's not Maybe maybe It's a

0:36:01 Unknown Speaker #2

process, guys. Okay. This that's what the gym's all about. Right? It's about somebody coming in one thing, leaving another.

0:36:06 Unknown Speaker #1

I I I I gotta say one thing. I need to take a push up break. I can feel my heart rate lowering.

0:36:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Can can we drop and do, like, thirty and take a break?

0:36:13 Unknown Speaker #3

Right.

0:36:16 Unknown Speaker #5

I can. Of course, I can.

0:36:18 Unknown Speaker #3

Course, we can. Alright.

0:36:19 Unknown Speaker #1

Let's take a quick break. We'll do some push ups. We'll come back in here tougher than ever. Great.

0:36:24 Unknown Speaker #2

Alright. We're back and we are pooped. Folks. Wow. What a thirty push ups. Thirty push ups is pretty crazy.

0:36:30 Unknown Speaker #5

In a row. That's good.

0:36:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Right in a row. Wow. But, yeah, thank you all so much for sticking out through the break. That long break that

0:36:38 Unknown Speaker #1

we're so sorry that we don't we don't know how to not make the break as long as the break we're taking. Right. So we're sorry that you waited an hour. Hopefully, you go you want that forward fifteen seconds button over and over again, and you're fine.

0:36:52 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. But we wanted to give people a little peek behind the curtain here today about how we sort of run the day to day of the gym. And one of those things we have to do every single week is we have program the week. You know, it takes a lot of work. We have obviously multiple classrooms, multiple different places where classes happen. And we have to go through every week and we have to schedule out exactly what's going on in every single one of those spaces. So we wanted to do that process on Mike this week. So people had a a little bit of an idea how things work here at the thirteenth Street Some

0:37:23 Unknown Speaker #3

classes are doing well. Certain classes with certain in truckers are doing well. So we wanna keep giving the patrons what they want and what they're responding to.

0:37:33 Unknown Speaker #5

Because, of course, we have all the favorites. Right? We have your aerobic step class.

0:37:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Now we

0:37:38 Unknown Speaker #5

got your Zumba class, your boxing class.

0:37:40 Unknown Speaker #3

We got the rock ride. Spend in the bicycle stadium.

0:37:45 Unknown Speaker #5

Right. Right. But also

0:37:46 Unknown Speaker #4

-

0:37:46 Unknown Speaker #1

not what I thought it was by the way.

0:37:49 Unknown Speaker #3

No. Right.

0:37:50 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, not what our plan was either. Our plan was that the rock was gonna come in and host a daily class

0:37:55 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah.

0:37:55 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:37:55 Unknown Speaker #2

which is still possible.

0:37:56 Unknown Speaker #5

Still possible -- Where else

0:37:57 Unknown Speaker #3

do his people.

0:37:58 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:37:58 Unknown Speaker #2

that's right.

0:37:59 Unknown Speaker #1

The the problem is I I friended the rock on LetterBox. Which is where all my movie reviews are. And he has now seen how I feel about all those movies. And

0:38:09 Unknown Speaker #5

you gotta put a wrong game there, Todd.

0:38:10 Unknown Speaker #1

I know. You you always have think you're you know, when you're reviewing something, when you're on mic, am I gonna work with this person in the future? Well,

0:38:17 Unknown Speaker #5

who could have thought that you would work with the rock. Nobody in hell. Nobody in the world.

0:38:23 Unknown Speaker #2

Nobody in the entire world would've thought of

0:38:24 Unknown Speaker #5

it. Yeah.

0:38:25 Unknown Speaker #2

But but we're trying to sort of broaden the horizons, you know, you wanna keep people on their toes. You don't wanna throw the same thing at Adam every week. So this week, we've got a a few really interesting, really exciting new courses on the agenda for all of you fitness heads out there.

0:38:41 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. I I I mean the one I've been kinda working on and I finally got the equipment together was Roomba Zumba And -- Awesome.

0:38:48 Unknown Speaker #1

i I think that, like, that one we could find maybe a thirty minute slot for. I know you guys thought maybe that people weren't gonna wanna do it.

0:38:48 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:38:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Because we needed people to help clean up the gym.

0:38:59 Unknown Speaker #3

But we also want them to get a good work

0:38:59 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm.

0:39:01 Unknown Speaker #1

totally.

0:39:02 Unknown Speaker #3

So we combine the two of those into one class.

0:39:04 Unknown Speaker #5

And it's sort of a step class where you try to step up on the moving roomba. Yeah. So sort of muscle confusion at the same time as aerobics.

0:39:12 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. You're stepping up on the roomba and you are following it around or or on top of it. And cleaning up whatever the roomba doesn't get with your mouth as if you're the roomba. That's right.

0:39:22 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. The roomba is doing no suction.

0:39:24 Unknown Speaker #3

We've got the roomba on learn, So it's just learning the room and not actually doing any cleaning,

0:39:30 Unknown Speaker #2

and then we've got people licking

0:39:32 Unknown Speaker #3

up the floor with their mouth.

0:39:33 Unknown Speaker #5

And then following that, class right after, we have ankle wrapping. This is a class on how to fix a twisted ankle

0:39:39 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:39:40 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:39:40 Unknown Speaker #5

because we find that ninety to a hundred and twenty percent of the people twist least one ankle in Zoom room.

0:39:40 Unknown Speaker #1

yes.

0:39:46 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. And and then Lynn Manuel Miranda comes in and does a rap about broken ankles that is really people love that.

0:39:54 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. That one sold out for, like, the next five years.

0:40:00 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. I mean, this guy can sell out

0:40:02 Unknown Speaker #1

a roof. People love them.

0:40:04 Unknown Speaker #5

And the the review has been that it's not very good, but the production is amazing.

0:40:08 Unknown Speaker #1

Production is amazing.

0:40:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. Because the ankle becomes the president? Is that not? I can't remember.

0:40:15 Unknown Speaker #2

Hank's Andrew Hamilton.

0:40:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Hank's under Hamilton? Yes. Yeah.

0:40:20 Unknown Speaker #5

The subtle derivative is a little derivative.

0:40:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, it feels like pretty much everything is the same except ankles and your hamper.

0:40:28 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right. That's right.

0:40:30 Unknown Speaker #3

But hey. You know what? He did the original and he can he can Yes. He can rip himself off.

0:40:35 Unknown Speaker #1

I was

0:40:35 Unknown Speaker #2

gonna say if anybody agrees that you can rip yourself off. Yes. If anybody agrees that you can rip yourself off, it's us.

0:40:42 Unknown Speaker #3

Absolutely. Oh my god. We're constantly aping ourselves.

0:40:45 Unknown Speaker #2

This is eleven seasons in a row, but ripping ourselves off. Yes. The one class I What

0:40:51 Unknown Speaker #1

are you talking about? The fuck are you talking about? This is the original and different

0:40:55 Unknown Speaker #5

it was just a joke. It was just a joke.

0:40:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, yeah. I was

0:40:58 Unknown Speaker #3

just joking around, buddy's I know you get a little bit

0:41:01 Unknown Speaker #5

todd, say something brand new. Todd, prove it to him. Say something brand new.

0:41:06 Unknown Speaker #1

Pod Todd.

0:41:08 Unknown Speaker #2

I'm a

0:41:09 Unknown Speaker #1

little a little kid that looks like me. I want to experiment.

0:41:12 Unknown Speaker #5

Okay. Well, that technically, that was a storyline that we did. So that wasn't new, but I told you

0:41:16 Unknown Speaker #3

you have you're you hold the world record for being accused of plagiarism the most, and you get a little defensive anytime anybody says we're Well, I countersued their world.

0:41:29 Unknown Speaker #1

I counter world record of them and I said, well, guess what, you have the world record for aping the most. Yes.

0:41:36 Unknown Speaker #5

Wow. Right. Would that work?

0:41:39 Unknown Speaker #6

I don't know because I don't know what the end goal was.

0:41:44 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, the classes are going really well. And I think people are tired of the same old stuff.

0:41:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Exactly.

0:41:49 Unknown Speaker #5

So in our aerobics room, instead of just aerobics, I've started a cooking class. Because people know what to do at the gym to get fit. But how do they take care of themselves outside of the gym?

0:42:00 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Full service.

0:42:01 Unknown Speaker #2

This gym's full service.

0:42:02 Unknown Speaker #5

And there's a bunch of mirrors everybody can see what the chef is doing. Of course, I'm the chef. Yes.

0:42:07 Unknown Speaker #1

And are they bringing in their own ingredients, or do you provide?

0:42:10 Unknown Speaker #5

Sometimes, Sometimes they bring in their own ingredients. Sometimes I bring in my own ingredients.

0:42:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Sometimes I forget to book food. And then I'm showing them what I would do to cook, say, maybe chicken souvlaki or something

0:42:15 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:42:24 Unknown Speaker #1

like that. It's pan to me. Yeah.

0:42:25 Unknown Speaker #5

It's pan to me. Right. Yeah. And then other part of the class, we make memes. We make memes out of the mainstream when we don't have food.

0:42:33 Unknown Speaker #3

I see.

0:42:34 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, I I can't I think that's a great idea because when I walk into a gym, the sights, the smells. Yes. The thing you need to add and I think it's always been missing is raw food being Yes.

0:42:45 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, you do Pilates picante. Right?

0:42:48 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right. It is the and I and I will prove this. It these spiciest boys a lot of time. Absolutely.

0:42:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. You got a lot of green chilies from New Mexico. You brought them in. Mhmm. You laced the little Pilates machines with them.

0:43:03 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes.

0:43:04 Unknown Speaker #3

And when people pull themselves up, it makes salsa.

0:43:08 Unknown Speaker #5

It makes also and it gets you sweating because all the little oils from the peppers are gonna burn the outside of your body while you're eating spicy salsa, which turns up the interior temperature of your body, and we make fajitas in the corner just for fun.

0:43:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. It's Which is a great

0:43:23 Unknown Speaker #1

neck workout because everyone hears what it goes

0:43:24 Unknown Speaker #5

for. Exactly.

0:43:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh my god. Record number of neck pulls. Checking out the

0:43:30 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:43:30 Unknown Speaker #5

that's right.

0:43:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Speaking of the Pilati Cante, we also have, you know, another play on Pilates, which is called Palates. Which is, of course, where we you schedule your class for eight AM, and then at in that morning, we send you an email saying, he says, they're actually, your class starts at six. And but you gotta you gotta get here as fast as you can

0:43:31 Unknown Speaker #3

man eat this.

0:43:54 Unknown Speaker #5

to work out as hustling to the

0:43:55 Unknown Speaker #2

gym, dear. It's the

0:43:56 Unknown Speaker #3

hustle And it's crazy that there up at six to see the email when they think they just have a class at eight.

0:44:01 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, how many times have you needed to be in shape and hustling when you didn't think

0:44:06 Unknown Speaker #2

yes.

0:44:06 Unknown Speaker #5

So that's the workout that you need to prepare your

0:44:09 Unknown Speaker #3

body for. If you're -- Yeah.

0:44:10 Unknown Speaker #1

if you're already showing up late, you don't also wanna show up. Sweaty and exhausted. Yeah. So we prepare you and it's not just that first email

0:44:10 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:44:17 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:44:18 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm. -- then it's like, hey, everyone's waiting. Question mark question mark question mark?

0:44:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes.

0:44:23 Unknown Speaker #1

This is really disrespectful.

0:44:25 Unknown Speaker #2

And then the level two class is you get to the room and there's a sign on the door that says, actually, it's across town.

0:44:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Mhmm. Yeah. And that's oh, oh, so you've gotta really run over.

0:44:34 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. So you gotta run over. You're late and you're in the other side of town.

0:44:37 Unknown Speaker #5

Level three, you've already been told the goof, then you arrive late to that one. Doors locked, if you're not on time door's locked. Right.

0:44:43 Unknown Speaker #1

If you're not on time door's locked.

0:44:44 Unknown Speaker #5

Which teaches you a real lesson.

0:44:46 Unknown Speaker #3

But we we I mean, people are getting upset with this class, and we do have late night, Pajetis

0:44:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes.

0:44:51 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm.

0:44:51 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:44:52 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:44:52 Unknown Speaker #3

which is Pilates by the devil.

0:44:57 Unknown Speaker #2

What is it?

0:44:57 Unknown Speaker #3

The actual devil, but the man that we that that everybody in town calls

0:45:01 Unknown Speaker #1

the devil.

0:45:01 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. He he plays Santa and the devil. And depending on what season it is. Yes. Yes.

0:45:06 Unknown Speaker #1

That's not the real devil.

0:45:09 Unknown Speaker #5

Todd, it's not the real Santa either.

0:45:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Well now, I'm suing my mom for long story. Every July, I would go sit on the devil's lap. Get a little photo of and terrify me and poke at me in my butt.

0:45:25 Unknown Speaker #5

I know. That's tough to learn. It's tough to learn this this late for you. Obviously, we audited same thing as kids, but we weren't going to sit on the devil's lapses at all.

0:45:34 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Office at Christmas, July, you go sit on the devil's lap. Many poke you in your butt. Yeah. It's one of our it's I mean, I think it's one of the best holidays, and I feel lucky to have grown up with it.

0:45:46 Unknown Speaker #2

The family that believed in practice. Yeah.

0:45:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yes. And and and I I do wanna mention we had a lot of people sort of dropping out of the yoga They're they're finding it a little too a little too chill. Mhmm. Not enough going on in there. So we do have a new class taught by Wilmer Valderrama called Yogama. It's a yoga class where you insult each other's mom. While you're in downward dog. So that and I can't believe we got him because they are doing the reboot To Huge? Yes. Huge. Yes. Yes. Huge.

0:46:26 Unknown Speaker #5

It sounded like you were saying he's huge, jealously. That's what it sounded like to me,

0:46:31 Unknown Speaker #1

i'm not jealous of Wilmer Balderrama.

0:46:32 Unknown Speaker #2

I mean, it's a huge cat for us.

0:46:34 Unknown Speaker #1

I I I also played a bunch of ethnically ambiguous characters. Anyone can do it. Anyone can do it. Well, I

0:46:40 Unknown Speaker #5

don't know that anyone should

0:46:42 Unknown Speaker #1

do it. Well, I've done it.

0:46:45 Unknown Speaker #5

You're right.

0:46:45 Unknown Speaker #2

He brat about that.

0:46:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Right. Well, I've done it. So he's I'm not that impressed. I'm not that impressed.

0:46:50 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, we love having him at the gym and we love yoga.

0:46:54 Unknown Speaker #3

You don't.

0:46:55 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, I'm not allowed in that class because if you insult my mom, but what it's well, you better keep my mom's name out of your mouth. That's all I'm saying.

0:47:01 Unknown Speaker #2

And you go fool Well, because we all remember all remember what happened to your mom last season. She was killed feeling orange by an orange.

0:47:07 Unknown Speaker #1

Right. Right. And

0:47:08 Unknown Speaker #3

you're similar to sex.

0:47:16 Unknown Speaker #5

I could tell it's so Oh my god.

0:47:18 Unknown Speaker #3

It's so raw

0:47:19 Unknown Speaker #1

and hot.

0:47:19 Unknown Speaker #5

It's almost as fresh as the orange.

0:47:23 Unknown Speaker #1

Who is again back for the record.

0:47:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Hello. Shut up, Mark. Shut up. We said you could sit in. Well, he's

0:47:32 Unknown Speaker #5

got, you know, his own career aspirations. We don't want to shut him out.

0:47:35 Unknown Speaker #5

Had a podcast.

0:47:35 Unknown Speaker #2

That's true.

0:47:36 Unknown Speaker #3

That is true.

0:47:38 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, yeah, I think that that I'd love to not be kicked out of that class because it does get you amped up if you're in a if you're in like a crow pose and someone's like, you know, your mom died in a ridiculous way.

0:47:52 Unknown Speaker #3

And over lunch line. They don't really do punch lines at you. They just kinda stay facts, really try to hurt your feelings.

0:47:52 Unknown Speaker #2

Right.

0:47:59 Unknown Speaker #1

And it worked. It worked.

0:48:01 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Definitely boiled your blood, which is a great way to lose weight. If you can boil your blood from from inside, that's a great workout.

0:48:08 Unknown Speaker #3

And, Sam, you got you got lit up pretty bad in that class because your mom actually died sitting around the house. Right?

0:48:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Sitting around.

0:48:17 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Right. She was ripped apart around the house.

0:48:20 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. She was also

0:48:22 Unknown Speaker #3

your mom sits around the house, she actually sits

0:48:23 Unknown Speaker #1

around the house.

0:48:24 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, as everybody knows, that's close to me. My mom is a bigger woman. And she when she sat around the house, she would she would physically sit around the house

0:48:34 Unknown Speaker #1

because she was so big

0:48:35 Unknown Speaker #3

and your house wasn't small? It's a mansion.

0:48:35 Unknown Speaker #5

one time

0:48:38 Unknown Speaker #5

Oh. It was a mansion.

0:48:40 Unknown Speaker #1

Okay. Okay.

0:48:42 Unknown Speaker #5

My mom was so fat.

0:48:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, I know.

0:48:44 Unknown Speaker #5

One time she sat on a rainbow

0:48:46 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:48:47 Unknown Speaker #5

mhmm. -- skittles popped up.

0:48:49 Unknown Speaker #3

Okay. That

0:48:50 Unknown Speaker #2

wow. So a That really shows

0:48:52 Unknown Speaker #3

mama jokes are based on your actual mother. In fact, every mama joke is based on your mother?

0:48:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. It's Yo mama. Okay. Yo's wife.

0:49:02 Unknown Speaker #1

Yo as in the Spanish. Nice.

0:49:04 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Wait. Your mother. Your mother. Wait. So you're telling me that your mama's so fat. Her belt size is equator.

0:49:15 Unknown Speaker #5

Unfortunately, not anymore, but, yes, at one time, at one time, that was the truth. She also God. Puts that equator sized belt on with a boomerang.

0:49:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh my

0:49:27 Unknown Speaker #1

gosh. It's the only way to get it all the way around anyways.

0:49:29 Unknown Speaker #5

I know. It's really tough. It's really tough. So that class I skip It's good.

0:49:34 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. That's good. That's good. Because there are a limitless amount of your mama jokes, which we all know all of them. And we've My mom's right a quarter and

0:49:43 Unknown Speaker #5

a book came out of George watching the snow. That's how heavy she is. She squeezed a burger out of a corner.

0:49:51 Unknown Speaker #3

Are there any, like, yo mama so nasty jokes where they all weight base? Like, why do we really let our mamas have it about their weight.

0:49:59 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, because it's okay to joke about fat people. Do you know what I mean?

0:50:03 Unknown Speaker #3

They don't

0:50:03 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, oh, right.

0:50:04 Unknown Speaker #5

feel it. Right. Right. And nobody cares.

0:50:08 Unknown Speaker #3

Nobody cares about them.

0:50:09 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Right. It's fine. It's totally fine.

0:50:12 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, as for one, Really miss your mama. And I just need to say that to you right now, Sam. Thank you so much.

0:50:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Your mama was so nice.

0:50:25 Unknown Speaker #5

And this is not a joke. No, ma'am. Okay. No. I know. I I can tell by your tone. I can tell by your tone.

0:50:34 Unknown Speaker #3

She would come over and bring me food when I was sick, sit around the house, of course. Worse.

0:50:41 Unknown Speaker #1

I have such great memories of sitting around the house with your mama. Of course, she was actually sitting around the house. And we were a Nick to her outside of the house because she

0:50:52 Unknown Speaker #2

was blanketing the entire house.

0:50:53 Unknown Speaker #1

I miss your mama.

0:50:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, god, your mama. Two. If I can bring your mama back for one day, I wouldn't let her sit on any quarters. That's for sure.

0:51:02 Unknown Speaker #1

No? Well, I don't know. Maybe George Washington needs a little

0:51:04 Unknown Speaker #5

nose blow. Your mama god, your mama. That's me Corizone.

0:51:15 Unknown Speaker #1

I am, mama, is my heart.

0:51:19 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. That's what I am.

0:51:21 Unknown Speaker #2

Is my heart.

0:51:22 Unknown Speaker #5

That's what I'm so say to her, of course. I would always say, yo mama. It's because

0:51:27 Unknown Speaker #3

well, let's pour one out for yo mama right now.

0:51:30 Unknown Speaker #1

We obviously not anywhere near her grave because she could come back to life and eat it all because your mama was so hungry.

0:51:38 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, she was so hoodie that she came back to life and ate it

0:51:41 Unknown Speaker #1

all one time.

0:51:42 Unknown Speaker #3

She ate it all.

0:51:43 Unknown Speaker #4

She yes.

0:51:44 Unknown Speaker #5

It all. Yes.

0:51:49 Unknown Speaker #3

I know. That was tough when she

0:51:50 Unknown Speaker #5

ate that one. Well, I I'll tell you what. It was one of the happiest days, my wife.

0:51:54 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh my god. When when your mama comes back from the dead, you're so happy, but then you find out she's just coming back to eat it all.

0:52:00 Unknown Speaker #5

Right. Wow. Right.

0:52:02 Unknown Speaker #1

I do feel like we've come to a close on your mama, but I I wanna say, Howard, that your mom might have been a redneck.

0:52:15 Unknown Speaker #5

How do you know? I have thought about it.

0:52:17 Unknown Speaker #2

Wait. How do you know?

0:52:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, of course, now I know these ones. Yes. Maybe Bill has a few more

0:52:24 Unknown Speaker #3

well, I'm trying to think of one. Your mama was such a redneck. No. Well, your mama might be a your mother might be a redneck.

0:52:34 Unknown Speaker #1

Let's see. Let's see.

0:52:35 Unknown Speaker #5

I remember I walked something about house, chunks.

0:52:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah.

0:52:37 Unknown Speaker #5

I walked into the house, and your mom was staring at the orange juice container. Because it said concentrate. That's what I thought she might be rednecking.

0:52:47 Unknown Speaker #3

I mean, your mom might be a redneck. Like, I don't

0:52:51 Unknown Speaker #1

wanna get into this on the air, but

0:52:53 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah. Your mama might

0:52:57 Unknown Speaker #1

be a redneck tower. You think you're

0:52:59 Unknown Speaker #3

if His mama is a If I couldn't tell.

0:53:03 Unknown Speaker #5

And I don't know if she's still doing this. But if, yo, mama fill it in, fill it in?

0:53:12 Unknown Speaker #3

Something about old junk cars. Yeah. Around the carousel. Junk cars around

0:53:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Or something.

0:53:18 Unknown Speaker #5

the house.

0:53:19 Unknown Speaker #3

When she has a junk car around the house, they are actually around the house.

0:53:24 Unknown Speaker #2

My my mom might be a redneck.

0:53:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Your mom.

0:53:27 Unknown Speaker #2

I She'll mama. She might be. Yeah.

0:53:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Now that I'm thinking, she might be.

0:53:32 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, if you guys wanna take yoga, mama, with volde oflderaanma. Yeah. You know You know,

0:53:37 Unknown Speaker #3

your grandma. I'm sorry.

0:53:39 Unknown Speaker #2

But there's plenty of other classes. That that are coming up.

0:53:43 Unknown Speaker #3

What we're really trying

0:53:44 Unknown Speaker #1

to figure out is the because we're competing now with what we've we own the daytime. Yeah. We're competing with twenty four hour fitness for the midnight to seven AM workouts. Yes.

0:53:53 Unknown Speaker #1

we're trying to figure out which classes will attract that crew. There's money to be made there.

0:53:53 Unknown Speaker #3

And so

0:53:58 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Because a lot of people who work out their psychos about it, and they'll just come in at two AM. Yeah. A Mark

0:54:05 Unknown Speaker #1

walberg crew. They come they wake up at one thirty. They come in and pray for three hours, and then they and then they eat four hundred eggs and do push ups all day. Right. Yes. And it's like so do we do for these guys who clearly have something that they don't wanna face?

0:54:18 Unknown Speaker #5

The lifeblood of our company.

0:54:20 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. Yes. And so we're trying to figure out those night classes more than just night yoga and stuff like that and what those classes are gonna be.

0:54:28 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, we have lifting in the dark where everybody gets a sort of what do you call that night vision camera set. We turn off all the lights

0:54:35 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:54:36 Unknown Speaker #3

yes.

0:54:36 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:54:36 Unknown Speaker #5

because like in one of these fancy restaurants, when you can't see what you're lifting, you really feel it more. Yeah.

0:54:43 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Yeah. Stimulus, you're not distracted by, you know, looking at somebody else's guns over there. You're you're thinking about your own guns pumping your own eye.

0:54:43 Unknown Speaker #5

what I'm mean?

0:54:43 Unknown Speaker #1

You know

0:54:51 Unknown Speaker #1

And you end up a lot of people end up lifting way more than they think they could. Because you have this definition of like, oh, I can only bench ten

0:54:59 Unknown Speaker #1

yes.

0:54:59 Unknown Speaker #1

five pounds.

0:54:59 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:55:00 Unknown Speaker #1

And then you get to

0:55:00 Unknown Speaker #2

Which is yes.

0:55:02 Unknown Speaker #2

it just goes hand in hand with our policy of not labeling the weights.

0:55:05 Unknown Speaker #1

We don't label rights here.

0:55:06 Unknown Speaker #3

We don't.

0:55:07 Unknown Speaker #1

We won't. No labels at all here. The the weights, your clothes, you know, it's all about non preconceived no ships. Yes. So, yeah, there's there's weightlifting after dark, which is We

0:55:20 Unknown Speaker #2

have the one class called porn on in here.

0:55:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Porn on in here.

0:55:24 Unknown Speaker #1

It's a normal wait listing, but

0:55:27 Unknown Speaker #3

hardcore on the spot.

0:55:28 Unknown Speaker #5

Our second most popular clock.

0:55:30 Unknown Speaker #1

Kanye it that one almost daily. Yeah.

0:55:33 Unknown Speaker #2

Huge client

0:55:34 Unknown Speaker #1

for us.

0:55:34 Unknown Speaker #5

He's not a big lifter. No. Not a big lifter, but he's there.

0:55:38 Unknown Speaker #3

No. He'll come in there and do chest and watch about two hours born.

0:55:46 Unknown Speaker #1

Tween? Just to born.

0:55:50 Unknown Speaker #3

Well well, we have chest only, which is always packed. A lot of top heavy guys. Yeah. Chest only.

0:55:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Because there's a lot of bias days stuffed in here.

0:56:00 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Just only we got the that that's a really good class. People love that

0:56:04 Unknown Speaker #1

one. What is your guys' workout? Because, you know, some people do, like, you know, legs and back Monday, Wednesday, Friday. It's

0:56:11 Unknown Speaker #2

a split. You're trying to

0:56:12 Unknown Speaker #1

prioritize split. So it is. Yeah.

0:56:14 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, I'll do joints one day. Right. I'll do gymnastics one day, and then I'll do bones another day. I like to get three hard days to work out. Yes. And then I do four days of forced rest.

0:56:30 Unknown Speaker #1

So anytime you try to move,

0:56:32 Unknown Speaker #5

i'm strapped. I'm strapped to the bad So you

0:56:35 Unknown Speaker #1

said you're an actor for

0:56:36 Unknown Speaker #5

What Hannibal Lector or more exorcist strapped? Hannibal And standing and strapped, and I have a nurse, and she she straps me in because I really wanna let my muscles rest. Like, I'm going to know this. You work them out and you damage them

0:56:36 Unknown Speaker #3

it, please.

0:56:50 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:56:50 Unknown Speaker #2

your muscles grow on the rest days.

0:56:52 Unknown Speaker #5

you damage them

0:56:52 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:56:53 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah.

0:56:53 Unknown Speaker #5

and then you repair them by rest days.

0:56:53 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:56:55 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. You must grow on the rest days. They don't they don't grow on the the work days, guys.

0:56:58 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right.

0:56:59 Unknown Speaker #1

That's great. Right now I'm on Monday, Wednesday, Friday's feet and hands. Mhmm. And then Tuesday, Thursday's hair.

0:57:05 Unknown Speaker #5

And and that has been working genius

0:57:08 Unknown Speaker #3

for years.

0:57:09 Unknown Speaker #1

Thank you. Yeah. I I'm wondering if my hair strands are a little too strong now if I need to kind of

0:57:14 Unknown Speaker #3

i mean, I didn't wanna say this, but is your hair juicing

0:57:19 Unknown Speaker #1

how dare you? Whatever my hair is doing is legal and it's natural. So no, I'm not juicing Why do you

0:57:26 Unknown Speaker #3

feel like your hair's balls shrunk?

0:57:29 Unknown Speaker #5

I saw It's aging. I saw you doing hair pull ups the other day, and it was insane. You did two hundred hair pull ups.

0:57:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm.

0:57:38 Unknown Speaker #5

And I've never seen anything like it.

0:57:40 Unknown Speaker #1

Well yeah, that's just natural. It's just that I I had this unused strength that now I'm using and so I've been you know, I've been, of course, knocking him out of the park with Sammy's hair and Mark's hair and that's just natural. Yeah.

0:57:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Wow. Wow.

0:57:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Wow. And you're a natural. You mean, no pomades, no, you know, creatine blends.

0:58:03 Unknown Speaker #2

No extensions?

0:58:05 Unknown Speaker #1

How dare you? Well. No. No extensions.

0:58:07 Unknown Speaker #5

You seem pretty offended when someone asked if you got extensions.

0:58:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, because I didn't. I haven't ever gotten extension in my hair. I've never got an extension on an assignment. I've never got an extension on my taxes.

0:58:17 Unknown Speaker #2

We also haven't paid your taxes.

0:58:21 Unknown Speaker #1

Are we talking about the same thing even?

0:58:25 Unknown Speaker #5

No. I trust you. I just it's really nice to see someone working so hard to prove what we do is valuable.

0:58:32 Unknown Speaker #1

Thank you. Yeah. Yeah.

0:58:33 Unknown Speaker #5

Thank

0:58:33 Unknown Speaker #1

you. A lot of people have been stepping on my hair obviously. I walk through the gym, which is an issue and the painful and yanks me back. Right. And sometimes I say, oh, really late. Right. Like, I forgot I was it was supposed to hurt, but that's natural.

0:58:44 Unknown Speaker #5

Well, let's be clear what a hair pull up is. That's where you pull your hair out of your head and it grows an inch with each rep.

0:58:50 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:58:52 Unknown Speaker #3

It's clear what it is.

0:58:54 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. We we can almost cut that because it's so clear. Everyone knows that a hair pull up is you pull your hair out of your head and it grows an inch at what you rest.

0:59:02 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I've been doing that class where all the exercises look like you're humping

0:59:08 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:59:09 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:59:09 Unknown Speaker #3

you know, where you just, like, push a kettle bell up into the air, you thrust. Mhmm. It's supposed to help your glutes

0:59:09 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm.

0:59:17 Unknown Speaker #4

--

0:59:17 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm.

0:59:17 Unknown Speaker #3

but it makes you look ridiculous the entire time. So I I wanna get rid of the stigma of it it's not it looks weird to thrust.

0:59:27 Unknown Speaker #1

Right.

0:59:28 Unknown Speaker #3

So we've been doing a lot of thrusting, weighted thrusting, sort four play exercises.

0:59:36 Unknown Speaker #1

Well and I I that one pairs really well with kind of my teaching style, which, you know, there's some yoga teachers and stuff where we're like, hey, it's not embarrassing to fart here or to let out a sigh on sound or a moan. And some usually there's one guy in the class who's like, awesome.

0:59:52 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Well,

0:59:53 Unknown Speaker #1

this is the class. It just seems like you've

0:59:54 Unknown Speaker #3

been saving it up. Right.

0:59:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Because I saw those people so you can thrust, and it's totally okay, all class if you have to fart what one out.

1:00:03 Unknown Speaker #1

if you got a little moan, let it out.

1:00:03 Unknown Speaker #5

Or

1:00:05 Unknown Speaker #5

You've made some of your own positions up. Right? You you don't just do all the normal ones that they've been doing for ages and ages.

1:00:11 Unknown Speaker #1

No. Well, I learned a lot Bill's thrust in class. Right. Yeah. It's a ton of new kind of, I would say, neo position because they're brand new, and it sounds cool to call me now. There's What is the matrix? There's the matrix. So there's, of course, the neo getting shot by Bullitt's position, which is cool.

1:00:28 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. A lot of people leave after that one in the ambulance. Yeah.

1:00:33 Unknown Speaker #2

They're heading out. Yeah.

1:00:34 Unknown Speaker #3

They're heading out. That's what I meant. Yeah.

1:00:36 Unknown Speaker #1

But with that one, you're allowed to make bullet sounds and they're like

1:00:39 Unknown Speaker #5

that's awesome. Whoa.

1:00:43 Unknown Speaker #1

Right. Other positions I'm working on

1:00:46 Unknown Speaker #5

you're doing downward hog. The other day, which is like downward dog, but you're oinking.

1:00:50 Unknown Speaker #1

You're oinking. Yeah. It's okay to oink. I, you know, let out the oink on sound here. Don't be embarrassed.

1:00:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Right. Why does everybody assume the thing I have to let out is a sigh or a fart? It's an oink. Sometimes I have an oink to let out. I'm not trying to oink.

1:01:06 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. You just got a little oink inside of you. And society says it's weird to just oink

1:01:10 Unknown Speaker #5

in class. I'll moo in class too. I don't care. If there's a moo inside of me, I'd love to not have to hold that

1:01:16 Unknown Speaker #1

in. A few times you've moved in class and I thought someone was stealing my mooza. So the because you have a very authentic sounding move.

1:01:24 Unknown Speaker #5

Thank you so much. It's rotary. Really? It's a rotary. So it sounds a lot like a Mazda.

1:01:30 Unknown Speaker #1

I see.

1:01:31 Unknown Speaker #3

I see. I see.

1:01:33 Unknown Speaker #1

But I I do wanna say, like, that we were taking suggestions for classes we have no ego or Not

1:01:42 Unknown Speaker #2

at all.

1:01:44 Unknown Speaker #5

List. We have no list.

1:01:45 Unknown Speaker #1

List I think is probably a great word for it. So we've got some questions.

1:01:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Other ideas,

1:01:50 Unknown Speaker #1

we have or not. Yeah. So we'd like to we have to fill out the schedules again. This has been incredibly popular. There is something about the way we are -- Right.

1:01:57 Unknown Speaker #4

--

1:01:57 Unknown Speaker #1

that is great for gym culture.

1:01:59 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes. Everything that we allow and don't care about is exact what a gym needs. Mhmm.

1:02:05 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, and working out in jeans is back. So if anybody wants to do that, we're back out preferred. You get discount

1:02:12 Unknown Speaker #5

if you come in jeans. And any jeans

1:02:14 Unknown Speaker #3

in converse and and wallet change. And feel free to work out in those.

1:02:18 Unknown Speaker #5

And if you come in baggy jeans, a old tank top and a pair of like court classics and you're above the age of fifty, you get to work out for free.

1:02:29 Unknown Speaker #3

right. If you talk about your band that you're that you that's playing this weekend, you get free. Free admission.

1:02:29 Unknown Speaker #1

That's

1:02:39 Unknown Speaker #1

One day we had every it was just four hundred people all at the same time talking about their band playing this

1:02:44 Unknown Speaker #3

week. Yes.

1:02:45 Unknown Speaker #1

It was awesome. It turned out they were all playing the same concert.

1:02:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Mhmm. If you spend most of your money on your car lease free admission.

1:02:58 Unknown Speaker #5

That's right. That's right.

1:02:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Free free free. Man.

1:03:02 Unknown Speaker #1

And so I think that I'm kind of working on here is and I'm like looking forward to the next weeks as the feedback on my own body and so that's something that I think we should kind of allow here as you can see someone walking by and tell them like, hey, you should work on this or I saw you working out. You clearly want advice from a guy you've never met. And you can start telling me how to do my work.

1:03:24 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, that's another thing we should. We really should highlight. This is not a gym where it's frowned upon to sort of critique each other.

1:03:31 Unknown Speaker #2

We want that. We want the sort of directly competition. You know? If you see somebody who's who, you know, needs to do a little bit of work on their calves, you go up and you tell them, hey, your calves are looking pretty tiny today.

1:03:31 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, you should.

1:03:43 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. Or if someone's using the the incorrect form, go ahead and touch their body light.

1:03:47 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Go ahead

1:03:47 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

1:03:48 Unknown Speaker #5

and touch them lightly because just to let them know, I'm just here to help. Gotta let them

1:03:51 Unknown Speaker #2

know where they need to be feeling.

1:03:53 Unknown Speaker #3

And we we have been I wanna let everybody know this week that we have been hanging out at the back door of anchor management class and anybody who gets thrown out of these classes, they get a direct straight shot into teaching a spin class in our gym.

1:04:11 Unknown Speaker #5

They can promote it immediately.

1:04:13 Unknown Speaker #1

What we've done is we've created a tube so they get thrown out of a garbage bin, and and the tube is right at that back door and they slide right through it across town onto a bike.

1:04:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Bike. And we have a big bag of things they can throw at you to to to motivate.

1:04:29 Unknown Speaker #2

I should I should also mention a lot of people are familiar with the Planet Fitness Lung. We have the Lung reward, which is -- Yep.

1:04:35 Unknown Speaker #4

--

1:04:35 Unknown Speaker #2

the more noise you make clanging around your weights, the cheaper. You're

1:04:40 Unknown Speaker #1

you're you caught it punching them around.

1:04:40 Unknown Speaker #3

yes.

1:04:40 Unknown Speaker #4

--

1:04:42 Unknown Speaker #3

And just so everyone knows, we do we we just got in the hundred and twenty to two hundred and fifty pound kettle bells.

1:04:51 Unknown Speaker #2

Unlabeled, though.

1:04:53 Unknown Speaker #5

They look small, but they're very good.

1:04:55 Unknown Speaker #3

They're dense as hell, they're made from an alloy, opposite aluminum. The and they they're ready to wreak havoc on your lower rack. If anybody wants to sing those things around.

1:05:07 Unknown Speaker #5

I can't believe we forgot to mention this. This is our flagship class, and Todd teaches it.

1:05:11 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We're teaching those.

1:05:12 Unknown Speaker #5

We have whole cycle. Where where Todd's asshole comes camera ready. And and you can see not only what it looks like for Todd to ride the bike, but what his butthole looks like while he's riding

1:05:23 Unknown Speaker #1

we would love to fill that class out. We are really struggling to get butts in seats for that class. Interesting. Unfortunately,

1:05:32 Unknown Speaker #3

the teacher sure is insists it's okay to fart.

1:05:41 Unknown Speaker #5

But hey. Things are going really well. Yeah. We haven't taken any advice or finished the list yet. So imagine what happens We're in work in progress. Imagine what happens when we get there. If it's already this successful

1:05:53 Unknown Speaker #2

that capacity bringing in money hand over fist folks This is honestly We've been relatively successful with some things in the past. This is probably the most successful venture we've ever had. And it's not because our personalities and our sort of approach to things really resonates with a certain type of person.

1:06:08 Unknown Speaker #5

I've noticed that we do very well in the private sector

1:06:12 Unknown Speaker #4

--

1:06:12 Unknown Speaker #5

where rules are not allowed.

1:06:12 Unknown Speaker #2

yes.

1:06:14 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Yeah. It's capitalism is perfect for us because there's always enough people that want your thing.

1:06:19 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes.

1:06:20 Unknown Speaker #1

And nobody around to tell you now. Yep. And that's working great for us that, like my I'm really proud of my friends here. Looking at all of you.

1:06:29 Unknown Speaker #5

Me too.

1:06:29 Unknown Speaker #1

Your awesome bodies. Yes. Thank you. It's just really cool. We're getting buff. Yeah. We're getting buff. We're getting buff. Well, we'll see you all next week. Right? Is that right?

1:06:40 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. If you come down to the gym, we'll be there, and you'll be there next week.

1:06:44 Unknown Speaker #1

That's next week of the checkout. I'll be back. Yeah. Yeah.

1:06:47 Unknown Speaker #3

I think so.

1:06:48 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Greg. You're

1:06:49 Unknown Speaker #3

gonna make time. Yeah.

1:06:51 Unknown Speaker #5

And and my big guess is that every week before the podcast, we step on the scale. My big guess is between the four of us, we're gonna lose one hundred pounds by next week.

1:06:59 Unknown Speaker #1

Minimum.

1:07:00 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yes. Yeah.

1:07:02 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. And and, Sam, we do have a nice moment of silence for Yo mama this week, which we're excited about. So Tuesday will be silent workout But come on in anyway.

1:07:02 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah.

1:07:17 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm. Show zero. If you make any noise, that is so disrespectful, feel Well,

1:07:21 Unknown Speaker #5

i'll come up and scream at you

1:07:22 Unknown Speaker #1

because this

1:07:23 Unknown Speaker #5

is my momma's day.