So these are all spalding microphones. They don't have these? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That'd be good.

Pretty cool. They're really branching out into a lot of different things, other than basketball.

I love it when a company realizes that their their market too narrow and they start making other crap. Like like when like when Polaris -- Uh-huh.

--

they used to make CD dues and and all that kind of stuff, then they started making these land vehicles. Uh-huh. Yes. And I like I love it when a company just broadens their their market their market share. I don't know what the word is for their catalog.

Yeah. I got hilarious shoes, and I just couldn't stay up on those.

Yeah.

Yeah. Couldn't stay up.

Well, they're amphibious, which is nice.

It's very nice. Because so are my feet.

So Yeah. Nine wheels on a shoe. I mean, do you need it? Oh, are your feet still cold blooded?

Yeah. Cold blooded webbed amphibious. Wow. But the rest of my body isn't. So I it's a lot of temperature management. That's why you'll see my feet just chilling on a hot rock more than times, but my body's chilly.

Yeah.

Speaking a hot rock, the terrarium is really popping off this week. Yeah. Yeah.

It is. Had a big viewership.

Yeah. You know, I'd like to think it's because of me, but I think it's because of Burverts? Well, I'm hoping. I know that there's a few, but I'm hoping that the majority of the people who are sort of partaking in in the observation of the terrarium are not just there because they're perverts. We do know a few of them are. And, you know, we try to weed them out. You know? We've we've sort of I do appreciate you guys working undercover in the crowd to try to find the perverts.

And if people

are just coming back to us, let's explain again what you're doing in the terrarium. It's you living -- because we know.

--

are we recording? We know.

Have we started the episode?

Yeah. Oh, see. Have have we Well,

let's yes.

Can we before we start? Could we just do a little I'm really trying to get my gym brain. You can always just do ten push ups before you do a thing -- Alright.

So it's fine.

--

before you rest in hard work.

Everybody do ten real quick. Everybody just do ten real quick. Should we do them all at the same time or should we do them individually?

Let's count all together.

Let's all count together.

Okay. Close our eyes.

Okay. Eyes closed. What? Slow down. Hey. We gotta slow down.

We gotta slow down. Three.

How about two? Two?

You can go down to your knees if you need

to, Bob.

I don't do lady push ups.

They're knee push ups, Todd, we discussed this. They're knee push ups.

Yeah. Right. We know.

And Can I go down to my waist?

Of course. Okay. Just do the cobras.

Yeah. I'm gonna do the cobras. Alright. Oh, this is a big bend in the back. I go onto my back? Yeah.

I was gonna say, I was going on our back. It's going our back.

Yeah. We're

just pushing

up. Push up the air.

Yeah. Push up there.

Bye. Oh.

Out of

the air.

It's strong air today. It's a strong air today. I shoulder feels impinged by the air.

I'm gonna go down to my knees on the air.

A knees up back all the way down.

That's the way we like to frown.

Oh, yeah. We like to frown over

with these socks.

I'm frowning me. Now everybody nice big, frown on these.

It's okay. I'm frowning up.

Is there a way to get fungi, hydrogen in the air, so it's a little bit center.

Oh, let

me turn on the hydrogen pump. Was that the right one? I hope.

I think you

have a little girl

at the end of

all the other age. Do the other age?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Turn down base. Speak at a base pump. Speak at a base pump. Oh, geez. Oh, when we're low, we can do them easier. There are ways you would rock us down.

But so long inside. Oh.

Long has returned the doll of it.

That was a really great recommendation, Ted.

That was awesome. I

feel good. So Well,

imagine if you did that

before you do everything. You do ten push ups before you start your podcast. You do ten push ups before you get lunch. You do ten push ups before you go bad.

Yeah. I think you're gonna get a little bit stronger.

Yeah. Yeah. Thirty minutes.

Yeah. Absolutely. That's thirty extra push ups a day. Right? Thirty extra push ups a day

every week twenty one extra hundred push ups a freaking month. Yeah. I think you're gonna get a lot stronger. Yeah. Totally.

You add twenty one eight hundred hundred push ups a day. I think it's gonna work.

Yeah.

Hey. Well, with that, why don't we get the grind?

Wait. Wait. Before we start,

you know what else that is?

Wait. Wait. Wait.

Just mindset. Mhmm. That's just mindset. My total.

You just have to change your mindset. If you I mean, the the things we could do if we put our mind to it.

That's true.

Yes. They're

unbelievable. Unbelievable. But let's what do you say what do you say we hit it with the grind? Grind. Yeah. Rise and grind. Folks, Welcome to the teacher's lounge. At one time, it was the first on best and only podcast pertaining issues relevant to the Hamilton High School community.

Sure.

Now, Yeah. Absolute shit hole now. It's a podcast dedicated to your four favorite teachers and the thirteenth Street fitness center. Wellness center, which we have sort of taken over, sort of not even sort of all the way taken over in the last few months, and things are going great. I am of course Howard, Levis resident turtle, and previous biology teacher here with my three best friends.

What's up, my name's Sam Weatherman. I am the personal trainer to the stars. I hope. Come on down to the thirteenth street fitness wellness center.

Hello, Bill Cravey. I run the supplement and smoothie bar here at the thirteenth Street, Wellness and fitness center. Really, really got a lot of good stuff here. So stop by. Get yourself a little something before your workout and after.

Todd Padre, student of men's bodies for my new play, what are men or what is men?

Yes. Is it plural or is it singular?

The name of the play or the title?

Or are

you just throwing the question out?

Yeah. Men, are or is.

And what is the difference between the name of the play and the title? Are those

the same

or are those different?

That's a fantastic question which we cover in my again, if you if you have not seen my theater masterclass. It is all about questions like this. What's the way to play in the title? That's the first hour. Second hour theater, t h e a t r e or t a v h.

You have to start with clarity.

Yeah.

Hundred percent.

Yeah. You all have to be on the same page.

Yes.

Now Todd, how's it going trying to get that course on the actual masterclass website because I know you submitted Right.

You haven't had many sign ups in the class pass area, which we're working with. We got all of our classes on class pass. So far, no one has signed up for

so, yeah, I'm trying to be able to sign up at the gym so then I can tell masterclass, look how many people at the gym are coming to class.

Right.

Sadly, I had to restructure it because Bill Clinton's got a master class now and that covered a lot of my stuff. How to talk to Monica?

Where to meet Monica?

We're gonna meet Monica.

Mhmm. Well, you're both professionals in the same field. Do I have?

Yes.

That happens.

We both

got we both got upset. True class is how to talk to Monica and where to meet Monica.

Well, he's got like

an addendum class that's lip bites and thumb pushes, which is a big technique for me if if anybody's trying to sell my -- Yeah. -- hamlet.

You guys right.

You know

what I'm saying? Give yourself something to do. Buy your lip. Push your thumb. One of those two things.

You need motivation. Yeah. If your lip's so inserting, you know why you're angry.

Yeah. Yeah. I cried through all of my handling performance.

You were you you actually had to have a a lip graft. You've been through it pretty hard.

Yeah. That's right. So we did the first ever public because I wanted everyone to learn from my experience. You know how some people you know, they'll do a live colonoscopy to get men to get colonoscopy and stuff. Right. I do a live

which works for me. That that brings me

oh, well, we were all like they were like, you have to get them. You're in your seventies. You're supposed to have this done in your late forties, and we were like, okay. Well, as soon as it you feel the the

as soon as you see it once live at Madison Square Garden,

you're gonna wanna go. If you feel the state the the Bank of America Hamilton arena with a live one will be there.

That's right.

Thank you so much for Wayne Wayne Brady for coming down and performing.

You can do a colonoscopy, honestly, with anything. Well, we gave

him yeah. We gave him a suggestion. And he did a colonoscopy for us.

He did one of the pool noodle look straight through the middle of

the afternoon. It was hilarious. Did colonoscopy hoe down, which I love. Yes. And and and we had such a good time. We all immediately went to the pharmacy and we bought a colonoscopy drink. And we all just hit did a buddy's drink together.

Yeah.

And I I do two of those a morning now and it just clears you out and you're ready for camera or your colon is.

Yes. Yeah. Well Camera ready, colon.

How long does it take your colon to go through hair and make over me? And did it have to get and you're fitting what took a while for your colon the other way.

It's an early call time for sure. My colon's up at the crack of dawn. No pun intended. Yeah. It rivals Jim Carrie getting into the Grinch costume. It's about eight hours.

Forced and it's green.

I know it's green. Yeah. That's what they to get it out of.

Did they force your assholes call the other day and had to work a double?

Yeah. It was a forced call, which I've been talking to the union about.

Crap. Appoonian. Appoonian. Well, that's great.

C o two.

Well, we got him in all the gym room,

by the way. Oh, yeah.

Of course.

How long Yeah.

We haven't I mean, we've been doing pretty great.

It's been surprising. All all the projections, you know, we had a business plan coming into this. We did all of our due diligence. We decided how What would a success look like for us coming into this? And we thought, you know, making our investment back in five years. We were thinking on that kinda horizon.

Yeah.

But it's in the last few months, We've we've already

unfortunately, we have reached capacity. We are at capacity. And we're trying to figure out ways to get more members in here. There's of course, some room upstairs that we're we're trying to take over. We've been talking to the tenants upstairs and seeing if we could get some of that room.

Yeah. Yeah. That's a non profit. Yeah. Yes.

Yeah. It's a non profit and an orphanage upstairs.

Yeah. And we've I think we've priced them out. We've been talking to landlord and undercutting them, but I think we priced them out pretty well.

Yeah. We can we can evict them.

But people are shocked by the success we've found because because honestly, I guess our reputation around town is that we're not the most savvy businessman or savvy.

Course, sort

of people. But but something about the way we're running this place is just attracting a very specific type of of, well, man with expendable income and time to blow because these guys are here and they are pumping all day

and I think we're finding that as long as you cut the right corners

-- Yes. --

people don't care. Yes. People that come to the gym want certain things. They want nice equipment. They want nice place to go. Yeah. Do they care about a smile when you enter? No. No. Do they care about, like, real cleanliness?

No. No.

No. No.

No. Absolutely not. Do you they they care about having a first aid kit anywhere? No. Not at all. Nobody cares about that stuff.

That's what the damn paramedics are for.

Exactly. Exactly. What do we pay them for? What are we paying for? If we're gonna put the gauze on, if somebody drops a weight on their foot,

which Yeah. And we've got a bulletproof contract that everybody has to sign when they sign up.

We we know responsibility.

You work out at your

own risk.

Yeah. Yeah. No. We we took everything you see in the world and we put it in the contract as far as risk. So

--

mhmm. -- you park in the parking lot, we're not response for your valuables at all. No. The lockers were not responsible. We're no one stealing them.

We employ these. We employ these.

Of course, you have to.

You have to.

You have to.

You have everybody on this be responsible. And so we have petty thefts around petty thieves.

They are so petty. One of them came up to me. He's like, I think you still owe me three months from a couple months ago.

I was

like, dude. Come on, dude. I'm sure I got to a coffee too.

Stowel then, yeah, man, for my pocket. Yeah. I bought him several coffees.

Yes.

But he was like, well, yeah. But I I remember I paid for half of that hundred percent all be frank

--

yeah. -- at the Jackass movie.

Apparently, I broke in front of one of the thieves mom at a movie at the popcorn line, he robbed the shit out of

him. Patty.

Patty. Patty. Patty. Patty. Patty.

Patty. Patty. Patty.

I I think the thing I'm the proud stuff though

--

yeah.

--

is the bathrooms. And then the locker rooms

--

yeah. -- and just how immaculate they are. Yeah.

Class class class.

It's all class in there. You can there's a lot of locker room space

--

mhmm. -- so you're not stuffing your stuff.

Some of our most popular classes are in there. Mhmm. We have a shower class.

Shaw well, you have to learn to shower.

You have

to I don't know. Shower class is booked.

And then and I think this is honestly the secret to how we've made this gym so successful is that in this gym, you pay for everything. You don't get to just take a shower. You it's a part of a class. No. Or if you've already taken the class, you get special access to the second tier shower, that costs a little bit extra.

You can test into the second tier shower. Yes. You can. We have to watch your shower

and make sure

you have to test out a shower one.

And for ease of use, everything is quarter based.

Yep. So if

you wanna go to a class, you just take one of the quarters out of your jingly pocket. Yep. And then you drop the quarter in.

And wait. To sell big huge quarter bags

--

yes.

--

at the front.

Of course.

You have to have a big sack

of quarters.

You just have to have that at the gym.

What the lat pull down machine is a dollar twenty five. You get eight pulls for a dollar twenty five.

For a pound.

Well, if you come on the right day, you can get really butts because all the coins are in the waitstaff. If you come right after we clear -- Yeah.

--

sure you're only gonna be able to do a ten pound lap pull down.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

But and so that's you you can base the time of day based on how ugly and weak your lats are. If you're big, tall, buff lats like me and the guy in the Northman, then you can do You

guys are the same look.

Well, I've been going for that look ever since I saw the trailer. So, yeah, nice buff, huge lats, big beautiful, awesome body. Mhmm. I'm really studying this like men's form for the for my play.

Fascinating.

And I'm seeing how you can look how you want to. I spent my whole life thinking forced to look the way I look. Yeah. You

know who else did that that you remind me of, Todd? DaVinci. DaVinci studied the mail for -- Yes.

--

figure out how it moved. That classic

picture of the man with his arms out. Exactly.

Yeah, man with his arms out in the circle and all the lines No. That's how that is. Shit like that all sorts of times. Yeah. I have an idea what it means. But, yeah, just like because I you know, we're all ugly, but you don't have to be is what I'm learning.

No. Right?

I'm really sculpting myself.

Isn't it funny how the ugly is face on the most beautiful body you don't even look at their face?

Bezos. Exactly.

Bezos. Exactly, Bezos.

Look at Bezos. Look at Bezos. Everybody wants to fuck Hey, so Everybody, despite his head.

Despite his head. Worst head on the planet, but he keeps the rest of it tight.

Mhmm. And it's good to get buff in your fifth Mhmm.

It's good to start your workout plan in your fifties.

So anybody listening and you think you're way over the hill and all you have is money, but nobody Come get buff.

Yeah. We're looking to get We're looking to get old man ripped tummy. You you you guys know that. It's a hard weird tummy, weird belly button.

Some people and some people who are younger can sometimes achieve old man rip bodies. So Joe rogan, I think, has classic old man ripped body and then, like, a younger man's body.

And the big change is your eight pack goes from eight to two.

Yep. You

just become really buff and you have two parts in the stomach, and that's all you really need.

If you wanna do it the rogan way, we can do it. You're cutting some corners, which again we're not afraid to do. But -- Right.

--

we'll have to pump you up creatine and rage. And then you have to it's a lot of alcohol and cocaine

and

we can get to that.

And for every body percent that you want to lose in fact, you unfortunately have to take an inch off of your height.

Mhmm.

So obviously, for him to get really ripped, he had to become four foot pounds.

Specifically your neck. Is there what your neck does kinda go into your body a little bit? That's right. And that's looking for. Buff you are, which is what men should look like.

It's really important to be able to kick in modern sorry. It's really important to

be able to kick someone

on the street as hard as

you can. Yeah. If you can't kick someone in the neck, And you're six years.

How are you gonna protect yourself on the street? Like, everybody knows when you're sixty, you have fat wallet.

Yeah. If you So you'd better roundhouse somebody at the auntie Anne's counter if they step in front of you. What are you doing?

What is your priorities are on.

Because if you can't if you know in your heart that you can't kick somebody in the face, then you're not willing to fly off the handle at this drop of time. You have to build your body in a way that you will freak out the second somebody

if somebody gives you a weird look, at a sandwich shop. If you can't put them in a pretzel immediately and make them scream uncle in front of their family, what are you doing? And if

and if you don't have the business acumen then sell that pretzel to auntie Ann's, you're also a loser. If you don't,

beat the hell out of somebody, take their merchandise and sell it for dollars on the penny.

Dollars on the penny?

Dollars on the penny.

That side of the business you wanna be on.

But I I I I am so proud of my friends. We thought we had to be teachers. We did we spent our whole lives trying to do good for others. Mhmm. And where did it get us? Jail humiliated -- Hell, yes.

--

jail held literally in the mall.

The mall other seasons.

We're working on ourselves. Yes. And we're saying, this is for us. If you wanna be like us come here, if you don't want to

--

yes.

--

we'll see you in what what what not in heaven because that's where we'll be, but you'll

be in Right. And it's so

nice too. Because, obviously, when we were teachers, that the the passion ended at four thirty PM or three thirty PM.

Which is also what it said on my reason for divorce.

The day of your wedding.

The passion ended at four thirty PM. Yes.

And then followed by the death of passion is gonna be the reception. Right? Yeah. There was it was on your invite. Death of passion.

Yeah. We From fourth from three thirty to four thirty. We brought a doctor in, and he looked at our relationship. He's a time of death, four thirty, and everything.

I saw him. Put a two fingers on you two holding hands and then look at his watch and call and call you out.

That was one of the most professional ceremonies I've ever been.

That was my idea.

Oh my god.

Todd, you are so on That's so brave. Most men would go to the grave lying saying they love their wife. You just immediately.

Most Smith would never tell the truth about loving their wife. You can put them on as many lie detectors as you want. They're gonna fool them all. They will go to the grave lying about love rather than heaven on this conversation.

First day, you admit

it and you say, hey, now we know what we have to work from.

Yeah. God. And yeah. So that everybody does in ceremony after that's a passion.

Now we know where we have to work from. Passion's gone.

Yes. And and it's nice to when you get off work, when you clock out, you're still obsessed with what you're doing during the day. I don't ever clock out. I'm always working. I'm always researching. I'm always finding out what's the new trend in the supplements? Can we figure out a way to get people's water weight down? Is there a new diet craze going on? What's happening? Are vegetables actually good for you. We don't know. We don't know any of this stuff.

I haven't seen you this manically passionate about everything in such a long time.

Is thirty minutes a day of feeding enough? Right. Feeding. Feeding. Yeah. A feeding window of thirty minutes a day. Right. I am messing around with intermittent fasting, full fasting forever, all these things. All these things.

I thought

you I was ever

that's fully fussy forever?

The the the press presentation that you gave last week was incredible about FFF.

I really appreciate that. And, you know, We did have a lot of people in their chairs asleep falling over.

Damn. But the presentation was good.

The orientation was so good.

Also, you a little sleepy. I'm I'm

frustrated. I was losing my place quite a bit. Mhmm. But that is your body eating away at the facts. And you gotta

and you gotta push past that difficulty. Right?

That's the

lesson to be learned from this f f f f situation

--

yes.

--

is that you have to push through the discomfort, and on the other side of that discomfort is euphoric.

Of course, it's gonna be terrible for the first two weeks a year ever. Like, it's gonna be rough. But we have to push these things. And you can tell by how I look right now, a little bit green, but shredded

--

mhmm.

--

that things are going really good for FFM.

And you've learned that with the right breathing techniques, you can sustain without food or water.

Absolutely. And and we've learned that right now we're finding out that you don't even really need vegetables. Yeah. This is a thing that's been sold to us by farmers.

Farmers are

out to get us big what? Big veggies? Big

fed, big pharma?

Big farmer.

Big farmer.

I believe we yeah. Big farmer is a thing we've talked about before.

And and we've been subsidizing these lazy men and overalls for so long. Yes. And we thank you

for saying it out loud,

so thank

you

for saying it out loud. They're shoving this grain down our throat. Oh, we gotta have corn. We gotta have this. We gotta have that. That's the person headed out right now.

They're headed out. They're headed out. They're headed out.

That's what about.

Head it out. Why?

What can I ask? Ninety three. We have another person headed out. Don't stop your workout. It's okay.

And that's right. This does go out live in the gym as we record it. Oh, yes. It's the perfect thing to work out.

Yes. We hijack into everybody's Bluetooth This is wide open in their ear right now.

And you control of

the

what's in it and the volume.

Oh, yeah. We pack it wide open. Everybody every wave to us at the gym. Always.

Oh, wait. Everybody's good to love.

Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. I'm I'm I'm tired of these farmers.

Mhmm. And I love seeing you this way, Bill. Mhmm. I love seeing you put because you are so smart, but you just it's hard to find something you care about. And you clearly have passion

--

yes.

--

but you've never been passion. It's it's always I've always had unaimed.

Well, you

don't know why we're divorced.

Well, you're a person who you have these fits and starts, where there'll be a moment where you get

pieces of fits.

What I would really love to see from here.

Right before I start.

What I'd love to see from you here, Bill, is I feel like there's been so many times where you've gotten just absolutely obsessed with something, and then you've just dropped Like Why? I think what I need for you here what I want for you in this first moment here is I want for you for you for the first time in your whole life to really commit to this. And I want this to

be your lifestyle. For once in my life, I'm not looking for other people's approval I am come it's coming from the inside out. It's all about what's deep inside of me coming out. You know? And we don't need vegetables. And we don't need all we need is meat and liver and kidneys uncooked and

it's a revolution.

Now hang on. Is that part of the f f f

well, this is different. F f f, I'm I'm trying out f f f every lifestyle is not for everyone. And f f f is not for you. If you're passing out at work, if you're dying, if you're if you're, like, if you're dying in the hallway -- Mhmm.

--

as you walk to the bathroom at night. It's not for everyone. We're doing high iron diets.

That's awesome.

We're doing no water. Mhmm. We're cutting out water.

Well, so much weight is water weight. Yeah.

So much weight is water weight. And I have been this week, figuring out ways to not breathe. Because I don't know if we actually need this. Big ops has been constantly being like, hey, we're running out of this stuff. Trees make it. We gotta plant trees. I just don't buy any of

it. Right.

You're gonna be scared. You have

to follow the money. Mhmm.

That's a very excellent point.

Who and and who gets paid off of everybody thinking they need to breathe? Mhmm. Oxy bars. Vegas

oxygen bar is what you have to follow. Huge.

Everybody knows why you go to Vegas. I've always been bar.

I've always yelled at those guys. What is this bullshit? What is this crap? Right. We have it. We we're we're breathing it. And do we really need it?

Because I'll

get hooked up to one of those things. And then when I get off of it, I'll fall in the little canal at Caesar's

well, you know, when you're so young, I'm not sure I would eat or breathe if I wasn't hot it by my parents. Yeah. Way. They tell us.

It's in a doctorate t

shirt trauma. It's learned trauma.

It is traumatic. It's abusive to make me eat and breathe. Yes. I am suing the doctor that spanked my butt to start me grieving.

That's great. And and in that trial, That trial has been fascinating. I mean, we're just in the discovery phase, of course, right

now. Mhmm.

But we've got, you know, you get the mark on your butt that you're entering of where when slap happened according to you.

Yes.

A little bit of nose trauma from the little snot sucker that you're going after them.

A little bit of nose trauma. Are you

kidding me?

No.

My left nostril huge. That's from that's from sucker.

That's from nose sucker. That's from snot sucker

up top. You you do have a case because I I've seen the video. And he he did he wound up before he slept. Geez.

Well, we've all seen the billboards around town, one of our good friends. It's a little baby's butt. It's red. It's got a hand on it, and there's a doctor in the shadow. And it's called one eight hundred, go fuck yourself, dog.

Yeah. We put together a class action because we didn't we didn't ask for this. We didn't ask to breathe. I'm suing my mom.

Good. Final.

File is I did how do you know I wanted to latch? Maybe I was just gonna go with meth.

You're obsessed with bottles to this day.

Oh my god. I eat out of bottles. Isn't that crazy? Not drink?

No. He eats

i stuff my sandwich into the butt end of a bottle, and then I

squeeze it through a nipple.

He has to suck so hard.

I'm obsessed. It's because of my stinky mom and that mean doctor, I can't stop

you because we don't it's just we're really breaking down what has been told to us and what has been sold to us over the years and getting rid everything we don't need. That's really what wellness is all about.

Shitting we're shedding ours our own personal skins through this process.

Because literally, we we Think about the cavemen.

Yeah. I always do.

The cavemen didn't have oxygen water or food. Like, they

had to fight they had to fight with lions and dinosaurs all day. And you think that and they're working on their beautiful art on the walls.

Which. We have do we have been in the basement, we have been figuring out ways to bring back dinosaurs

--

right.

--

and prehistoric creatures sort of That's part of Jim. We'll talk about this

on air.

Well, you know, I didn't want to because it's a little early, but I wanna put the pressure on us to deliver.

Because as

soon as you get the news out there, you can kind of reverse engineer some press because you

know what nobody talks about with these sort of early era man and how they eat. These guys are ripped. Yeah. These guys are ripped, and they knew what was the most important part of life. Yeah. The way you look on a post

office. Yes. Yeah. They

look so good on both sides.

And

that's and and and interestingly, I obviously, everybody knows my situation. I'm, of course, living in a terrarium in the old rack a ball course. Yeah.

It's very clear.

That we have sort of turned into a a sort of habitat, if you will, for for my man. And I

it's habitat for How Manity.

Yes. Exactly. How Manity? That's the name of the

i think that could go

to Vegas.

Demonstration -- Yes.

--

called humanity now. And and we have, of course,

certain It's really studying, but how do men do it. Well, amenity.

Well, Howard, also, it's a play on everything.

It's a play on

it's a play

on everything. Think of something.

It's a play on it.

Yes. And we're not sure yet if this is the title or the name of the piece. Right.

We don't we don't know yet.

We don't have.

Well, we have title words.

We haven't take touch after he teaches us how to lather on lotion, which you're teaching that in the locker room.

Yeah. That one's a long one. It's whole body slowly in front of the mirror that everyone can see.

But as as everybody knows, we start I started this this situation, I'll call it, this show, this this peace

--

mhmm.

--

to sort of confront my personal shame about my life to keep me in a constant state of observation so there was I couldn't hide anything from anyone.

And you have to live in a house. Yeah.

What's that?

People always wanted to live in a house with walls.

Well, yeah.

Right. You're like, you were a man of meager means

--

yes. -- meager means. And You you do you have a clown guru? Is that true that's working on your show with you, how Manity?

I'd well, I have I have a a person who I have sort of tapped for notes and sort

--

right.

--

sort of adjustments, which, of course, the big note was, I think, we should go a little

is this an old French man with a bad attitude?

It is an old French man

with a

bad attitude.

Okay.

And ripped me off.

You ripped up my

whole personality. You know what I mean?

Well, his his And

are you getting residuals? Probably not.

I wish I opened my mail every day.

Me too, Tom. I'll talk to

you and your neighbor's mail.

I've got it.

You think the mailman missed He missed your mailbox, put it in your neighbors?

I mean, we've gotten into enough arguments that he might be trying to fuck me. Yeah. Because, you know, I tried to bite my mailman like a dog? Do we need to to deal with this recently? Well, I

was I was I was back in the mail.

That's nice. But how how how are You're being trained by

this French man. And his big note for me was was I think we need to take this a little bit more primal, a little bit more primitive. Which is interesting because it's kind of -- Wow.

--

it's kind of this interesting kind of synergy again in the in the gym where I have taken to not wearing sort of standard human clothing. Yeah.

Loyn or less.

Loyn or less. His big note was Loyn or less.

Loyn leaning towards this. But loin.

But it's also it's also his order at a steak restaurant. Yes. We're trying to get fit.

Yeah. We're trying to get

set the cheapest order, we'll take the loin or less.

But so I have, of course, ditched clothes.

Can we?

I'm I'm only sort of I'm living similarly.

Can we, you know, through some of your some of your kind of animalistic stuff that you're working on. Yeah.

Absolutely. Because, you know, people

have gotten to watch it, but we haven't had it on the pod yet. Yeah. And you're a friend of the pod. And so

i have a hosted by. Well, you're a friend of it.

Not for a living son

how we're lovers here. I think

we're thinking about making your house. So far, you're a friend. You've been

the man guest we've had on every episode, and we love you as a guest. And we've had you back every episode. Seriously, you are

already about Howard Love us here again today, folks.

We love him. You always love him. We love we love

how he intros the show. Our guest our guest has been introed the show from the get go and he's been such a wonderful guest.

We'll bump you. It's a contract thing. We'll bump you once we can, but you're locked in for thirty seasons of the guest. So then we'll see.

But And seasons is not yours. Yes.

Decreasing pay every single price, which you agreed to.

But so how how we I wanted, like, do some of this primal stuff. I wanna see you be primal because

the return to man.

Well, the the most the most interesting thing, which I was honestly when my mentor, sort of, introduced this idea. The thing I was most freaked out by was if you guys in Jurassic Park speaking of dinosaurs, you guys you guys seen the scene where they sort of lower the goat in on the crane. Of course, yes.

I lived here.

And we all know what Todd's talking about. But just to clarify Todd,

every time Todd has A stroke, a heart attack, falls down, breaks his hip, they lift him up, all fours out of a sling. And sort of pull him with a helicopter and lower him into the hospital.

Well, first, they take him to dress

a car. They try to lure him in.

That no. The dinosaurs are like yucky enough.

Yes. They want you

to sort of bat them around for a second.

I've been spit out by a t rex. I've been spit out by a raptor. I've been spit out by crazy hair that's spit on new men.

I don't think it's crazy hair, but I do think I do think this is your best shot at residuals though. If you keep doing this, you may end up in a movie.

Yeah. Good luck. Getting Spielberg on the line. Damn anti semite. I'll tell you that much right now.

I don't know. I'm not sure.

Oh, yeah. I got a list. I wanna put you on Spielberg. A list of anti semites. Howard, I do want us to to to be a little bit primal here. I'm working on this in my Play, which I brought up with it several times, everyone's gotta come see it. Mhmm. What is men? Or what are men? What is Howard, you got we need to see your animal self. Give me a growl.

That was okay. That was okay. That was almost like the beginning

of that blur song.

That one.

Yes. Raha. Yeah.

That's close. That's cool. It's tough.

It's just not in me right now, but

come a good growling. Be made Powered.

Howard. When

you grow out, you said cowwered.

Well, try it again. Just say the first thing that comes to you, scrape like growl just go ahead. One, two, three. You just said hat. You said hat and you held up a sign that said, please help me. That's not Maybe maybe It's a

process, guys. Okay. This that's what the gym's all about. Right? It's about somebody coming in one thing, leaving another.

I I I I gotta say one thing. I need to take a push up break. I can feel my heart rate lowering.

Right.

Can can we drop and do, like, thirty and take a break?

I can. Of course, I can.

Course, we can. Alright.

Let's take a quick break. We'll do some push ups. We'll come back in here tougher than ever. Great.

Alright. We're back and we are pooped. Folks. Wow. What a thirty push ups. Thirty push ups is pretty crazy.

In a row. That's good.

Right in a row. Wow. But, yeah, thank you all so much for sticking out through the break. That long break that

we're so sorry that we don't we don't know how to not make the break as long as the break we're taking. Right. So we're sorry that you waited an hour. Hopefully, you go you want that forward fifteen seconds button over and over again, and you're fine.

Yeah. But we wanted to give people a little peek behind the curtain here today about how we sort of run the day to day of the gym. And one of those things we have to do every single week is we have program the week. You know, it takes a lot of work. We have obviously multiple classrooms, multiple different places where classes happen. And we have to go through every week and we have to schedule out exactly what's going on in every single one of those spaces. So we wanted to do that process on Mike this week. So people had a a little bit of an idea how things work here at the thirteenth Street Some

classes are doing well. Certain classes with certain in truckers are doing well. So we wanna keep giving the patrons what they want and what they're responding to.

Because, of course, we have all the favorites. Right? We have your aerobic step class.

Now we

got your Zumba class, your boxing class.

We got the rock ride. Spend in the bicycle stadium.

Right. Right. But also

-

not what I thought it was by the way.

No. Right.

Well, not what our plan was either. Our plan was that the rock was gonna come in and host a daily class

--

yeah.

--

which is still possible.

Still possible -- Where else

do his people.

--

that's right.

The the problem is I I friended the rock on LetterBox. Which is where all my movie reviews are. And he has now seen how I feel about all those movies. And

you gotta put a wrong game there, Todd.

I know. You you always have think you're you know, when you're reviewing something, when you're on mic, am I gonna work with this person in the future? Well,

who could have thought that you would work with the rock. Nobody in hell. Nobody in the world.

Nobody in the entire world would've thought of

it. Yeah.

But but we're trying to sort of broaden the horizons, you know, you wanna keep people on their toes. You don't wanna throw the same thing at Adam every week. So this week, we've got a a few really interesting, really exciting new courses on the agenda for all of you fitness heads out there.

Yeah. I I I mean the one I've been kinda working on and I finally got the equipment together was Roomba Zumba And -- Awesome.

--

i I think that, like, that one we could find maybe a thirty minute slot for. I know you guys thought maybe that people weren't gonna wanna do it.

Yeah. Because we needed people to help clean up the gym.

Mhmm.

But we also want them to get a good work

totally.

So we combine the two of those into one class.

And it's sort of a step class where you try to step up on the moving roomba. Yeah. So sort of muscle confusion at the same time as aerobics.

Yeah. You're stepping up on the roomba and you are following it around or or on top of it. And cleaning up whatever the roomba doesn't get with your mouth as if you're the roomba. That's right.

Yeah. The roomba is doing no suction.

We've got the roomba on learn, So it's just learning the room and not actually doing any cleaning,

and then we've got people licking

up the floor with their mouth.

And then following that, class right after, we have ankle wrapping. This is a class on how to fix a twisted ankle

--

yes.

--

because we find that ninety to a hundred and twenty percent of the people twist least one ankle in Zoom room.

Right. And and then Lynn Manuel Miranda comes in and does a rap about broken ankles that is really people love that.

Yeah. That one sold out for, like, the next five years.

Yeah. I mean, this guy can sell out

a roof. People love them.

And the the review has been that it's not very good, but the production is amazing.

Production is amazing.

Right. Because the ankle becomes the president? Is that not? I can't remember.

Hank's Andrew Hamilton.

Hank's under Hamilton? Yes. Yeah.

The subtle derivative is a little derivative.

Oh, it feels like pretty much everything is the same except ankles and your hamper.

That's right. That's right.

But hey. You know what? He did the original and he can he can Yes. He can rip himself off.

I was

gonna say if anybody agrees that you can rip yourself off. Yes. If anybody agrees that you can rip yourself off, it's us.

Absolutely. Oh my god. We're constantly aping ourselves.

This is eleven seasons in a row, but ripping ourselves off. Yes. The one class I What

are you talking about? The fuck are you talking about? This is the original and different

it was just a joke. It was just a joke.

Oh, yeah. I was

just joking around, buddy's I know you get a little bit

todd, say something brand new. Todd, prove it to him. Say something brand new.

Pod Todd.

I'm a

little a little kid that looks like me. I want to experiment.

Okay. Well, that technically, that was a storyline that we did. So that wasn't new, but I told you

you have you're you hold the world record for being accused of plagiarism the most, and you get a little defensive anytime anybody says we're Well, I countersued their world.

I counter world record of them and I said, well, guess what, you have the world record for aping the most. Yes.

Wow. Right. Would that work?

I don't know because I don't know what the end goal was.

Well, the classes are going really well. And I think people are tired of the same old stuff.

Exactly.

So in our aerobics room, instead of just aerobics, I've started a cooking class. Because people know what to do at the gym to get fit. But how do they take care of themselves outside of the gym?

Yeah. Full service.

This gym's full service.

And there's a bunch of mirrors everybody can see what the chef is doing. Of course, I'm the chef. Yes.

And are they bringing in their own ingredients, or do you provide?

Sometimes, Sometimes they bring in their own ingredients. Sometimes I bring in my own ingredients.

Yeah.

Sometimes I forget to book food. And then I'm showing them what I would do to cook, say, maybe chicken souvlaki or something

like that. It's pan to me. Yeah.

It's pan to me. Right. Yeah. And then other part of the class, we make memes. We make memes out of the mainstream when we don't have food.

I see.

Well, I I can't I think that's a great idea because when I walk into a gym, the sights, the smells. Yes. The thing you need to add and I think it's always been missing is raw food being Yes.

Well, you do Pilates picante. Right?

That's right. It is the and I and I will prove this. It these spiciest boys a lot of time. Absolutely.

Yes. You got a lot of green chilies from New Mexico. You brought them in. Mhmm. You laced the little Pilates machines with them.

Yes.

And when people pull themselves up, it makes salsa.

It makes also and it gets you sweating because all the little oils from the peppers are gonna burn the outside of your body while you're eating spicy salsa, which turns up the interior temperature of your body, and we make fajitas in the corner just for fun.

Right. It's Which is a great

neck workout because everyone hears what it goes

for. Exactly.

Oh my god. Record number of neck pulls. Checking out the

--

that's right.

--

man eat this.

Speaking of the Pilati Cante, we also have, you know, another play on Pilates, which is called Palates. Which is, of course, where we you schedule your class for eight AM, and then at in that morning, we send you an email saying, he says, they're actually, your class starts at six. And but you gotta you gotta get here as fast as you can

to work out as hustling to the

gym, dear. It's the

hustle And it's crazy that there up at six to see the email when they think they just have a class at eight.

Well, how many times have you needed to be in shape and hustling when you didn't think

yes.

So that's the workout that you need to prepare your

body for. If you're -- Yeah.

--

if you're already showing up late, you don't also wanna show up. Sweaty and exhausted. Yeah. So we prepare you and it's not just that first email

--

mhmm. -- then it's like, hey, everyone's waiting. Question mark question mark question mark?

Yes.

This is really disrespectful.

And then the level two class is you get to the room and there's a sign on the door that says, actually, it's across town.

Mhmm. Yeah. And that's oh, oh, so you've gotta really run over.

Yeah. So you gotta run over. You're late and you're in the other side of town.

Level three, you've already been told the goof, then you arrive late to that one. Doors locked, if you're not on time door's locked. Right.

If you're not on time door's locked.

Which teaches you a real lesson.

Yes.

But we we I mean, people are getting upset with this class, and we do have late night, Pajetis

--

mhmm.

--

which is Pilates by the devil.

What is it?

The actual devil, but the man that we that that everybody in town calls

the devil.

Yeah. He he plays Santa and the devil. And depending on what season it is. Yes. Yes.

That's not the real devil.

Todd, it's not the real Santa either.

Well now, I'm suing my mom for long story. Every July, I would go sit on the devil's lap. Get a little photo of and terrify me and poke at me in my butt.

I know. That's tough to learn. It's tough to learn this this late for you. Obviously, we audited same thing as kids, but we weren't going to sit on the devil's lapses at all.

Yeah. Office at Christmas, July, you go sit on the devil's lap. Many poke you in your butt. Yeah. It's one of our it's I mean, I think it's one of the best holidays, and I feel lucky to have grown up with it.

The family that believed in practice. Yeah.

Yes. Yes. And and and I I do wanna mention we had a lot of people sort of dropping out of the yoga They're they're finding it a little too a little too chill. Mhmm. Not enough going on in there. So we do have a new class taught by Wilmer Valderrama called Yogama. It's a yoga class where you insult each other's mom. While you're in downward dog. So that and I can't believe we got him because they are doing the reboot To Huge? Yes. Huge. Yes. Yes. Huge.

It sounded like you were saying he's huge, jealously. That's what it sounded like to me,

i'm not jealous of Wilmer Balderrama.

I mean, it's a huge cat for us.

I I I also played a bunch of ethnically ambiguous characters. Anyone can do it. Anyone can do it. Well, I

don't know that anyone should

do it. Well, I've done it.

You're right.

He brat about that.

Right. Well, I've done it. So he's I'm not that impressed. I'm not that impressed.

Well, we love having him at the gym and we love yoga.

You don't.

Well, I'm not allowed in that class because if you insult my mom, but what it's well, you better keep my mom's name out of your mouth. That's all I'm saying.

And you go fool Well, because we all remember all remember what happened to your mom last season. She was killed feeling orange by an orange.

Right. Right. And

you're similar to sex.

I could tell it's so Oh my god.

It's so raw

and hot.

It's almost as fresh as the orange.

Who is again back for the record.

Hello. Shut up, Mark. Shut up. We said you could sit in. Well, he's

got, you know, his own career aspirations. We don't want to shut him out.

That's true.

Had a podcast.

That is true.

Well, yeah, I think that that I'd love to not be kicked out of that class because it does get you amped up if you're in a if you're in like a crow pose and someone's like, you know, your mom died in a ridiculous way.

Right.

And over lunch line. They don't really do punch lines at you. They just kinda stay facts, really try to hurt your feelings.

And it worked. It worked.

Yeah. Definitely boiled your blood, which is a great way to lose weight. If you can boil your blood from from inside, that's a great workout.

And, Sam, you got you got lit up pretty bad in that class because your mom actually died sitting around the house. Right?

Sitting around.

Yes. Right. She was ripped apart around the house.

Yes. She was also

your mom sits around the house, she actually sits

around the house.

Well, as everybody knows, that's close to me. My mom is a bigger woman. And she when she sat around the house, she would she would physically sit around the house

because she was so big

one time

and your house wasn't small? It's a mansion.

Oh. It was a mansion.

Okay. Okay.

My mom was so fat.

Oh, I know.

One time she sat on a rainbow

--

mhmm. -- skittles popped up.

Okay. That

wow. So a That really shows

mama jokes are based on your actual mother. In fact, every mama joke is based on your mother?

Yeah. It's Yo mama. Okay. Yo's wife.

Yo as in the Spanish. Nice.

Yeah. Wait. Your mother. Your mother. Wait. So you're telling me that your mama's so fat. Her belt size is equator.

Unfortunately, not anymore, but, yes, at one time, at one time, that was the truth. She also God. Puts that equator sized belt on with a boomerang.

Oh my

gosh. It's the only way to get it all the way around anyways.

I know. It's really tough. It's really tough. So that class I skip It's good.

Yeah. That's good. That's good. Because there are a limitless amount of your mama jokes, which we all know all of them. And we've My mom's right a quarter and

a book came out of George watching the snow. That's how heavy she is. She squeezed a burger out of a corner.

Are there any, like, yo mama so nasty jokes where they all weight base? Like, why do we really let our mamas have it about their weight.

Well, because it's okay to joke about fat people. Do you know what I mean?

Oh, oh, right.

They don't

feel it. Right. Right. And nobody cares.

Nobody cares about them.

Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Right. It's fine. It's totally fine.

Well, as for one, Really miss your mama. And I just need to say that to you right now, Sam. Thank you so much.

Your mama was so nice.

And this is not a joke. No, ma'am. Okay. No. I know. I I can tell by your tone. I can tell by your tone.

She would come over and bring me food when I was sick, sit around the house, of course. Worse.

I have such great memories of sitting around the house with your mama. Of course, she was actually sitting around the house. And we were a Nick to her outside of the house because she

was blanketing the entire house.

I miss your mama.

Oh, god, your mama. Two. If I can bring your mama back for one day, I wouldn't let her sit on any quarters. That's for sure.

No? Well, I don't know. Maybe George Washington needs a little

nose blow. Your mama god, your mama. That's me Corizone.

I am, mama, is my heart.

Yeah. That's what I am.

Is my heart.

That's what I'm so say to her, of course. I would always say, yo mama. It's because

well, let's pour one out for yo mama right now.

We obviously not anywhere near her grave because she could come back to life and eat it all because your mama was so hungry.

Well, she was so hoodie that she came back to life and ate it

all one time.

She ate it all.

She yes.

It all. Yes.

I know. That was tough when she

ate that one. Well, I I'll tell you what. It was one of the happiest days, my wife.

Oh my god. When when your mama comes back from the dead, you're so happy, but then you find out she's just coming back to eat it all.

Right. Wow. Right.

I do feel like we've come to a close on your mama, but I I wanna say, Howard, that your mom might have been a redneck.

How do you know? I have thought about it.

Wait. How do you know?

Well, of course, now I know these ones. Yes. Maybe Bill has a few more

well, I'm trying to think of one. Your mama was such a redneck. No. Well, your mama might be a your mother might be a redneck.

Let's see. Let's see.

I remember I walked something about house, chunks.

Yeah.

I walked into the house, and your mom was staring at the orange juice container. Because it said concentrate. That's what I thought she might be rednecking.

I mean, your mom might be a redneck. Like, I don't

wanna get into this on the air, but

yeah. Your mama might

be a redneck tower. You think you're

if His mama is a If I couldn't tell.

And I don't know if she's still doing this. But if, yo, mama fill it in, fill it in?

Something about old junk cars. Yeah. Around the carousel. Junk cars around

the house.

Or something.

When she has a junk car around the house, they are actually around the house.

My my mom might be a redneck.

Yes. Your mom.

I She'll mama. She might be. Yeah.

Now that I'm thinking, she might be.

Well, if you guys wanna take yoga, mama, with volde oflderaanma. Yeah. You know You know,

your grandma. I'm sorry.

But there's plenty of other classes. That that are coming up.

What we're really trying

to figure out is the because we're competing now with what we've we own the daytime. Yeah. We're competing with twenty four hour fitness for the midnight to seven AM workouts. Yes.

And so

we're trying to figure out which classes will attract that crew. There's money to be made there.

Yeah. Because a lot of people who work out their psychos about it, and they'll just come in at two AM. Yeah. A Mark

walberg crew. They come they wake up at one thirty. They come in and pray for three hours, and then they and then they eat four hundred eggs and do push ups all day. Right. Yes. And it's like so do we do for these guys who clearly have something that they don't wanna face?

The lifeblood of our company.

Yes. Yes. And so we're trying to figure out those night classes more than just night yoga and stuff like that and what those classes are gonna be.

Well, we have lifting in the dark where everybody gets a sort of what do you call that night vision camera set. We turn off all the lights

--

yes.

--

because like in one of these fancy restaurants, when you can't see what you're lifting, you really feel it more. Yeah.

You know

what I'm mean?

Yeah. Yeah. Stimulus, you're not distracted by, you know, looking at somebody else's guns over there. You're you're thinking about your own guns pumping your own eye.

And you end up a lot of people end up lifting way more than they think they could. Because you have this definition of like, oh, I can only bench ten

--

yes.

--

five pounds.

Which is yes.

And then you get to

it just goes hand in hand with our policy of not labeling the weights.

We don't label rights here.

We don't.

We won't. No labels at all here. The the weights, your clothes, you know, it's all about non preconceived no ships. Yes. So, yeah, there's there's weightlifting after dark, which is We

have the one class called porn on in here.

Porn on in here.

It's a normal wait listing, but

hardcore on the spot.

Our second most popular clock.

Kanye it that one almost daily. Yeah.

Huge client

for us.

He's not a big lifter. No. Not a big lifter, but he's there.

No. He'll come in there and do chest and watch about two hours born.

Tween? Just to born.

Well well, we have chest only, which is always packed. A lot of top heavy guys. Yeah. Chest only.

Because there's a lot of bias days stuffed in here.

Yes. Just only we got the that that's a really good class. People love that

one. What is your guys' workout? Because, you know, some people do, like, you know, legs and back Monday, Wednesday, Friday. It's

a split. You're trying to

prioritize split. So it is. Yeah.

Well, I'll do joints one day. Right. I'll do gymnastics one day, and then I'll do bones another day. I like to get three hard days to work out. Yes. And then I do four days of forced rest.

So anytime you try to move,

i'm strapped. I'm strapped to the bad So you

said you're an actor for

it, please.

What Hannibal Lector or more exorcist strapped? Hannibal And standing and strapped, and I have a nurse, and she she straps me in because I really wanna let my muscles rest. Like, I'm going to know this. You work them out and you damage them

--

your muscles grow on the rest days.

--

you damage them

--

yeah.

--

and then you repair them by rest days.

Yeah. You must grow on the rest days. They don't they don't grow on the the work days, guys.

That's right.

That's great. Right now I'm on Monday, Wednesday, Friday's feet and hands. Mhmm. And then Tuesday, Thursday's hair.

And and that has been working genius

for years.

Thank you. Yeah. I I'm wondering if my hair strands are a little too strong now if I need to kind of

i mean, I didn't wanna say this, but is your hair juicing

how dare you? Whatever my hair is doing is legal and it's natural. So no, I'm not juicing Why do you

feel like your hair's balls shrunk?

I saw It's aging. I saw you doing hair pull ups the other day, and it was insane. You did two hundred hair pull ups.

Mhmm.

And I've never seen anything like it.

Well yeah, that's just natural. It's just that I I had this unused strength that now I'm using and so I've been you know, I've been, of course, knocking him out of the park with Sammy's hair and Mark's hair and that's just natural. Yeah.

Wow. Wow.

Wow. And you're a natural. You mean, no pomades, no, you know, creatine blends.

No extensions?

How dare you? Well. No. No extensions.

You seem pretty offended when someone asked if you got extensions.

Well, because I didn't. I haven't ever gotten extension in my hair. I've never got an extension on an assignment. I've never got an extension on my taxes.

We also haven't paid your taxes.

Are we talking about the same thing even?

No. I trust you. I just it's really nice to see someone working so hard to prove what we do is valuable.

Thank you. Yeah. Yeah.

Thank

you. A lot of people have been stepping on my hair obviously. I walk through the gym, which is an issue and the painful and yanks me back. Right. And sometimes I say, oh, really late. Right. Like, I forgot I was it was supposed to hurt, but that's natural.

Well, let's be clear what a hair pull up is. That's where you pull your hair out of your head and it grows an inch with each rep.

Yeah.

It's clear what it is.

Yeah. We we can almost cut that because it's so clear. Everyone knows that a hair pull up is you pull your hair out of your head and it grows an inch at what you rest.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I've been doing that class where all the exercises look like you're humping

--

mhmm.

--

you know, where you just, like, push a kettle bell up into the air, you thrust. Mhmm. It's supposed to help your glutes

--

mhmm.

--

but it makes you look ridiculous the entire time. So I I wanna get rid of the stigma of it it's not it looks weird to thrust.

Right.

So we've been doing a lot of thrusting, weighted thrusting, sort four play exercises.

Well and I I that one pairs really well with kind of my teaching style, which, you know, there's some yoga teachers and stuff where we're like, hey, it's not embarrassing to fart here or to let out a sigh on sound or a moan. And some usually there's one guy in the class who's like, awesome.

Yeah. Well,

this is the class. It just seems like you've

been saving it up. Right.

Because I saw those people so you can thrust, and it's totally okay, all class if you have to fart what one out.

Or

if you got a little moan, let it out.

You've made some of your own positions up. Right? You you don't just do all the normal ones that they've been doing for ages and ages.

No. Well, I learned a lot Bill's thrust in class. Right. Yeah. It's a ton of new kind of, I would say, neo position because they're brand new, and it sounds cool to call me now. There's What is the matrix? There's the matrix. So there's, of course, the neo getting shot by Bullitt's position, which is cool.

Right. A lot of people leave after that one in the ambulance. Yeah.

They're heading out. Yeah.

They're heading out. That's what I meant. Yeah.

But with that one, you're allowed to make bullet sounds and they're like

that's awesome. Whoa.

Right. Other positions I'm working on

you're doing downward hog. The other day, which is like downward dog, but you're oinking.

You're oinking. Yeah. It's okay to oink. I, you know, let out the oink on sound here. Don't be embarrassed.

Right. Why does everybody assume the thing I have to let out is a sigh or a fart? It's an oink. Sometimes I have an oink to let out. I'm not trying to oink.

Yeah. You just got a little oink inside of you. And society says it's weird to just oink

in class. I'll moo in class too. I don't care. If there's a moo inside of me, I'd love to not have to hold that

in. A few times you've moved in class and I thought someone was stealing my mooza. So the because you have a very authentic sounding move.

Thank you so much. It's rotary. Really? It's a rotary. So it sounds a lot like a Mazda.

I see.

I see. I see.

But I I do wanna say, like, that we were taking suggestions for classes we have no ego or Not

at all.

List. We have no list.

List I think is probably a great word for it. So we've got some questions.

Yeah. Other ideas,

we have or not. Yeah. So we'd like to we have to fill out the schedules again. This has been incredibly popular. There is something about the way we are -- Right.

--

that is great for gym culture.

Yes. Everything that we allow and don't care about is exact what a gym needs. Mhmm.

Oh, and working out in jeans is back. So if anybody wants to do that, we're back out preferred. You get discount

if you come in jeans. And any jeans

in converse and and wallet change. And feel free to work out in those.

And if you come in baggy jeans, a old tank top and a pair of like court classics and you're above the age of fifty, you get to work out for free.

That's

right. If you talk about your band that you're that you that's playing this weekend, you get free. Free admission.

One day we had every it was just four hundred people all at the same time talking about their band playing this

week. Yes.

It was awesome. It turned out they were all playing the same concert.

Mhmm. If you spend most of your money on your car lease free admission.

That's right. That's right.

Free free free. Man.

And so I think that I'm kind of working on here is and I'm like looking forward to the next weeks as the feedback on my own body and so that's something that I think we should kind of allow here as you can see someone walking by and tell them like, hey, you should work on this or I saw you working out. You clearly want advice from a guy you've never met. And you can start telling me how to do my work.

Oh, that's another thing we should. We really should highlight. This is not a gym where it's frowned upon to sort of critique each other.

Oh, you should.

We want that. We want the sort of directly competition. You know? If you see somebody who's who, you know, needs to do a little bit of work on their calves, you go up and you tell them, hey, your calves are looking pretty tiny today.

Yeah. Or if someone's using the the incorrect form, go ahead and touch their body light.

Yes.

Yeah. Go ahead

and touch them lightly because just to let them know, I'm just here to help. Gotta let them

know where they need to be feeling.

And we we have been I wanna let everybody know this week that we have been hanging out at the back door of anchor management class and anybody who gets thrown out of these classes, they get a direct straight shot into teaching a spin class in our gym.

They can promote it immediately.

What we've done is we've created a tube so they get thrown out of a garbage bin, and and the tube is right at that back door and they slide right through it across town onto a bike.

Bike. And we have a big bag of things they can throw at you to to to motivate.

I should I should also mention a lot of people are familiar with the Planet Fitness Lung. We have the Lung reward, which is -- Yep.

--

the more noise you make clanging around your weights, the cheaper. You're

--

yes.

--

you're you caught it punching them around.

And just so everyone knows, we do we we just got in the hundred and twenty to two hundred and fifty pound kettle bells.

Unlabeled, though.

They look small, but they're very good.

They're dense as hell, they're made from an alloy, opposite aluminum. The and they they're ready to wreak havoc on your lower rack. If anybody wants to sing those things around.

I can't believe we forgot to mention this. This is our flagship class, and Todd teaches it.

Yeah. We're teaching those.

We have whole cycle. Where where Todd's asshole comes camera ready. And and you can see not only what it looks like for Todd to ride the bike, but what his butthole looks like while he's riding

we would love to fill that class out. We are really struggling to get butts in seats for that class. Interesting. Unfortunately,

the teacher sure is insists it's okay to fart.

But hey. Things are going really well. Yeah. We haven't taken any advice or finished the list yet. So imagine what happens We're in work in progress. Imagine what happens when we get there. If it's already this successful

that capacity bringing in money hand over fist folks This is honestly We've been relatively successful with some things in the past. This is probably the most successful venture we've ever had. And it's not because our personalities and our sort of approach to things really resonates with a certain type of person.

I've noticed that we do very well in the private sector

--

yes.

--

where rules are not allowed.

Yeah. Yeah. It's capitalism is perfect for us because there's always enough people that want your thing.

Yes.

And nobody around to tell you now. Yep. And that's working great for us that, like my I'm really proud of my friends here. Looking at all of you.

Me too.

Your awesome bodies. Yes. Thank you. It's just really cool. We're getting buff. Yeah. We're getting buff. We're getting buff. Well, we'll see you all next week. Right? Is that right?