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s11e03

Howburger Helper

Originally aired: August 18, 2022

The Teachers discuss Howard’s terrarium in the racquetball court and what business should reside above the gym.

0:00:30 Unknown Speaker #1

I don't know. Would y'all mind if I sat out the push ups this morning? I'm not I'm feeling a little down.

0:00:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, what's wrong, Howard?

0:00:37 Unknown Speaker #3

Just Emotionally? Not.

0:00:39 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, yeah, I guess part part part emotion, part body. Just feels like I been a long couple couple days for me.

0:00:48 Unknown Speaker #4

Alright. To hear it.

0:00:49 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. It's all about showing up. Yeah. That's that's that's eighty percent of the battle.

0:00:54 Unknown Speaker #3

What do you mean you're showing up? You're here.

0:00:57 Unknown Speaker #5

Yeah. That's eighty percent of the battle. What if you

0:01:00 Unknown Speaker #2

did what if you did as many as you could?

0:01:03 Unknown Speaker #1

What if I can't do any?

0:01:05 Unknown Speaker #2

That's okay. What if that's as many as you can do? Well, then I

0:01:09 Unknown Speaker #1

and I accept.

0:01:10 Unknown Speaker #2

Okay.

0:01:11 Unknown Speaker #5

There's no shame in that, but you gotta be honest with yourself.

0:01:13 Unknown Speaker #2

There's no shame in getting zero, but there is shame in not trying. Yeah.

0:01:17 Unknown Speaker #1

Okay.

0:01:18 Unknown Speaker #2

I'd love to see you struggle through one.

0:01:21 Unknown Speaker #4

Look, just now. You said you were struggling and we showed up for that conversation for almost a whole second or two. And then we told you, you gotta do your push ups, you know. But we showed up

0:01:32 Unknown Speaker #4

you're -- that emotionally raw conversation as much as we could. Mhmm. And then I was satiated. I couldn't deal it with you anymore emotionally.

0:01:32 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:01:40 Unknown Speaker #2

The problem's not emotional, problems physical. It always is. Just gotta give the blood

0:01:44 Unknown Speaker #1

you know, you're right. Eighty percent of the battle showing up if you're here, you you did the hard part. That's so I'm here I'm here. I'll do a push up with you. I'll try it as many as

0:01:53 Unknown Speaker #2

would it help if we did squats today instead of push ups?

0:01:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Why don't we do air squats?

0:01:58 Unknown Speaker #1

Air squats. Okay. Yep. How many? Ten? Ten squats.

0:02:01 Unknown Speaker #2

That's what I'm shooting for. I'm going for a personal record.

0:02:05 Unknown Speaker #4

Ten air squats.

0:02:07 Unknown Speaker #1

Alright. Here we go. And one. I'm out. Oh, yeah. Todd.

0:02:13 Unknown Speaker #4

I'm out.

0:02:14 Unknown Speaker #2

Good hustle, Todd. Good hustle. You tried. Alright.

0:02:16 Unknown Speaker #4

You.

0:02:17 Unknown Speaker #2

You tried. That's that's more squats than you've ever done, technically.

0:02:20 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I got halfway down. Whoa. Yeah.

0:02:22 Unknown Speaker #3

You just sat you just kept going and sat on

0:02:25 Unknown Speaker #4

the floor. Yeah.

0:02:27 Unknown Speaker #3

That was not an air squad. That was you sitting down.

0:02:30 Unknown Speaker #4

Well yeah.

0:02:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Technically, the squat comes from standing back up.

0:02:33 Unknown Speaker #4

Again, I'll do another one. I'll do another one for

0:02:35 Unknown Speaker #1

my guy Howard. Well, just finish the one.

0:02:36 Unknown Speaker #4

Show my guy Howard.

0:02:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Just finish the one.

0:02:38 Unknown Speaker #4

No. I'm counting that one.

0:02:40 Unknown Speaker #3

And don't do it there.

0:02:42 Unknown Speaker #4

Onto my front and stand up and pull my knees in. But now someone lift

0:02:48 Unknown Speaker #2

using the little rope that toes you up a school there.

0:02:52 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. There we go.

0:02:53 Unknown Speaker #1

Alright. Alright. Here we go.

0:02:55 Unknown Speaker #4

Two Oh,

0:02:57 Unknown Speaker #6

todd. Todd?

0:02:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, Todd. Todd?

0:03:05 Unknown Speaker #2

Todd just walked backwards, slid down the wall and fell asleep.

0:03:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Todd.

0:03:12 Unknown Speaker #2

Todd's the beginning of the set, man.

0:03:14 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, I'm showing up for Howard. How did you do too?

0:03:16 Unknown Speaker #1

I did.

0:03:17 Unknown Speaker #4

Wow. Wow. I

0:03:19 Unknown Speaker #2

didn't even know how do you feel.

0:03:20 Unknown Speaker #1

I feel alright, actually. And that maybe that's a testament to this mantra. I thought I didn't wanna do it, but now that I'm doing it, I'm kinda getting energized.

0:03:28 Unknown Speaker #3

Where'd you go?

0:03:29 Unknown Speaker #2

If you did five squats every day

0:03:31 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:03:31 Unknown Speaker #4

here we go.

0:03:32 Unknown Speaker #2

that's twenty five squats per per week week day, work week.

0:03:32 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:03:35 Unknown Speaker #3

More a week?

0:03:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Then if you're taking your average weeks per month, that's four. You're doing a hundred extra squats a month. Yeah. I think you're gonna get stronger. I think so. I'm pretty sure you'll get stronger if you do a hundred extra squats a month. You know how many squats that is a year extra?

0:03:51 Unknown Speaker #2

almost twelve hundred extra squats a year. Yeah. I think you're gonna get stronger.

0:03:51 Unknown Speaker #4

That's

0:03:56 Unknown Speaker #4

Sam, I'm loving the motivation, the intensity here. The conversation I think what's happening with a lot of it though when you're kinda talking to people is you get a little bogged down in the math and like in the past years, it gets a little harder for you.

0:04:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah. Well, if

0:04:11 Unknown Speaker #2

you're doing twelve hundred squats a year, and you're taking that over ten years, say for the next ten years,

0:04:16 Unknown Speaker #4

you wanna very easy.

0:04:17 Unknown Speaker #2

You wanna raise your health. Right? Them. Twelve hundred squats times ten years

0:04:21 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:04:22 Unknown Speaker #2

yeah. -- should be at least a million squats. Right. Now now you're telling me in the next ten years, you do a million squats I think you can

0:04:30 Unknown Speaker #1

get a little bit wrong. Appreciate it a little bit wrong. And, I mean, if you spread that out over your lifetime, the average lifetime, sir,

0:04:36 Unknown Speaker #3

if you would be

0:04:37 Unknown Speaker #1

in seventy what? Seventy two? I'm sorry. Maybe sixty five.

0:04:40 Unknown Speaker #2

That's right. You know, five spots a day for being the last My whole thing is I wish I would've started as a baby.

0:04:45 Unknown Speaker #3

If I

0:04:45 Unknown Speaker #2

would've started as a baby, five spots a day, Imagine that. That's five and I'm only doing work days because I I take weekends off. That's my cheat meal day. Right? Five squats a day for my whole entire life, that's ten thousand weeks

0:04:58 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:04:58 Unknown Speaker #2

of work weeks. That's at least fifty that's a Google plexus Yeah.

0:04:58 Unknown Speaker #1

uh-huh.

0:05:04 Unknown Speaker #1

You're sure you're gonna get a lot stronger

0:05:05 Unknown Speaker #2

if you do that. Just watch all day for your wife.

0:05:08 Unknown Speaker #1

Should we alright. Should we hit the rest of these ten and then and then get into it? Try to hit them as fast we can or what.

0:05:13 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, yeah. We did we not finish him while I was out there?

0:05:17 Unknown Speaker #1

You were a gotchas?

0:05:18 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I think so. Or sleep or whatever is the same.

0:05:21 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Let's just Yeah.

0:05:23 Unknown Speaker #2

Let's finish

0:05:23 Unknown Speaker #4

it. Four.

0:05:25 Unknown Speaker #2

Five. Six. Seven. Eight. And Hang. Now was take it up, Howard. Yeah. Was I hearing somebody taking a poop on a pee pad? I thought I

0:05:39 Unknown Speaker #6

saw you

0:05:40 Unknown Speaker #2

lay out a peapad before we did squats.

0:05:42 Unknown Speaker #4

Howard's been Howard's been House training in the terraria.

0:05:47 Unknown Speaker #3

I've been I've been giving Howard some some pills that that clean you out. Yeah. They're sort of an oil pill that kinda clean you out. They don't let anything stick to your insides.

0:06:00 Unknown Speaker #2

It's like a healthy oil. Right? It's like

0:06:02 Unknown Speaker #3

it's a healthy oil.

0:06:03 Unknown Speaker #1

Extra version.

0:06:04 Unknown Speaker #3

It's extra virgin oil.

0:06:05 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, yours

0:06:06 Unknown Speaker #1

is. Okay. No. I did

0:06:08 Unknown Speaker #3

it myself. It's it's unfortunate

0:06:10 Unknown Speaker #2

to sell five.

0:06:13 Unknown Speaker #3

The oil that I've been giving Howard Fucks. But when he takes it in and I've actually been selling it when it comes out extra virgin.

0:06:22 Unknown Speaker #1

I did you. I was gonna say, I did a little research into what you're giving me, and it is it is a Virgophobic. So if you it's a Virgo phobic fluid. So if you put it into a virgin, it goes through it as fast as possible, it takes anything you can.

0:06:37 Unknown Speaker #4

And so now what's been opening is a lot of kind of authentic Italians have been showing up from Parma mode and -- Yes.

0:06:44 Unknown Speaker #4

parmesan mono.

0:06:44 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:06:46 Unknown Speaker #2

These are authentic, Italian.

0:06:47 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. They're coming in and they are feeding olives to Howard.

0:06:51 Unknown Speaker #3

There is a tour that keeps stopping by to sort of, like, stay the weekend buy oils from you. The most version of and

0:07:01 Unknown Speaker #2

i think everybody at home is familiar with foie gras. Right?

0:07:05 Unknown Speaker #2

take a goose, you open their mouth, and you stuff them full until their liver gets fat.

0:07:05 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. You

0:07:11 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yeah.

0:07:12 Unknown Speaker #2

That's somewhat similar to what's happening to you, Howard.

0:07:14 Unknown Speaker #1

I hope not, but it does seem like that is the direction things go.

0:07:19 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, I see an olive tube running into your mouth right now. An olive tube? Yeah. Feels like there's all of these

0:07:24 Unknown Speaker #3

getting popped. Well, we have to turn a profit here. Yeah.

0:07:29 Unknown Speaker #2

And honestly, the the margins in this EVLO is huge.

0:07:35 Unknown Speaker #4

E v l o. Oh, extra virgin.

0:07:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Extra virgin olive

0:07:37 Unknown Speaker #4

oil. E v l o.

0:07:39 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Well, alright. Well, let's just get the damn things going. Alright. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of the teacher's lounge used to be the first best and only podcast between the issues relevant to Hamilton High School. And Hamilton High School Community. But now, it is, of course, a podcast dedicated to everything going on at the thirteenth street fitness and wellness center. Owned and run by your four favorite teachers. I am Howard Levis, your resident, lettuce eater.

0:08:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Terarium inhabitor.

0:08:12 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. So we you weren't able to get any meats in the hunting. And now you have been eating the leftover lettuce that the mouse won't eat.

0:08:19 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Well, Yeah. It's this. It that seems to be the only thing that's sort of a stay in still for me. So I'm trying.

0:08:27 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, hey, I'm really proud of your dedication and I think if you stay in there long enough, you're gonna get stronger both physically and mentally because let's be honest, for you, it's mental.

0:08:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Absolutely.

0:08:38 Unknown Speaker #2

And that's the part of the wellness that comes in with the gym. We want everyone to be fit, of course, but you can't get fit if you're not well.

0:08:44 Unknown Speaker #1

That's true. We're after we will. You wanna get fit. Thanks. Good news from Sam. Sam Weatherman, of course.

0:08:49 Unknown Speaker #2

Hey, Sam Weatherman. What's happening? I am the mathematician who figured out how to get of it. Okay?

0:08:56 Unknown Speaker #3

It's all about mine.

0:08:57 Unknown Speaker #4

It's a beautiful mind over here.

0:08:59 Unknown Speaker #2

You can't everybody thinks they can just crush their workout once a week three times a week. I find you wanna do as little as possible as many days in a row. You wanna really find that flow. Yeah. You do three push ups an hour Mhmm.

0:09:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh

0:09:13 Unknown Speaker #2

my god. How many hours a day you awake? Eight, sixteen, depends on who you are. Right? You do six Yeah. You do three hours excuse me. I have a confused heart. You do three push ups, yep, for the sixteen hours of your weight.

0:09:24 Unknown Speaker #4

Your term trip report.

0:09:25 Unknown Speaker #2

At least. Okay. Let's see that. There it is. Three times eight. That's no idea. Clean enough for the erasers work. That's fifty four push ups a day. You do fifty four push ups per work day per week, It's five.

0:09:38 Unknown Speaker #3

Of course. You take the weekends off cheat day.

0:09:39 Unknown Speaker #2

Check the weekends off cheat day, eat a lot of waffles. And then you're doing fifty four push ups times five. Right. That's three hundred something. And then you're and then you're yeah. I'm pretty sure

0:09:49 Unknown Speaker #3

you're gonna get stronger. Stronger. The incredulousness at the end of Sam's training. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm thinking it's gonna work. Well, people think you can't

0:09:58 Unknown Speaker #2

do a little bit every day and see results. Right. If you just did twenty two calf raises every quarter hour. That's twenty two calf raises four times an hour. Right? Sixteen hours a day, eight hours a day, depending on how much you Right. Right? I'm only up eight hours a day.

0:10:14 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:10:14 Unknown Speaker #2

I sleep sixteen hours a day. I gotta get into sleep factor later. But Staying it gets stronger.

0:10:21 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Sam has really been into carrying the notebook around with him while he's working out. We've all seen those guys the gym and girls and girls that's right.

0:10:31 Unknown Speaker #2

You could use your phone.

0:10:32 Unknown Speaker #4

Acknowledge them.

0:10:33 Unknown Speaker #2

You could use your phone, but technology to me, Rob Zivar humanity, So I've gotta bring a novelty large pen. A novelty large notebook. So I want everyone to know how legitimate it

0:10:47 Unknown Speaker #3

it's very interesting how long his novelty large pen is. So when you're writing, the other end of it is making huge sweeping numbers at the top of the gym. Hello, Bill Cravey. I'm running the the bar the smoothie bar and the wellness center out front. A big week for us. Got a lot of new supplements in. Please stop by. Please stop by. Please stop by. Stop by stop by.

0:11:14 Unknown Speaker #2

Stop my god. That's really genius.

0:11:17 Unknown Speaker #4

Todd Padre, director and star of play what is men or what are men on the part of the basketball courts that is going against the flow of the game. Yeah. There'll there'll be the two rims on the basketball side. The perpendicular part of the oh, wow. We got two math whizzes. Yeah. So I'm doing my play on those. And

0:11:39 Unknown Speaker #2

and you stay off the court. You respect the game.

0:11:42 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot I mean, there's a lot of ball and me having to run-in a little bit. Will help? Yeah. A lot of little help. From mostly from my end because I'm my commands are falling off and stuff. Because I bought pants for my thicker muscly self. Mhmm. And it hasn't come yet. It's not that that body. Mhmm. So all my pants are falling off right now.

0:12:03 Unknown Speaker #2

You're trying to get so buff that your waistline goes up.

0:12:06 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Muscle waist. Muscle waist.

0:12:09 Unknown Speaker #3

Muscle waist.

0:12:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Which is actually You've actually been diagnosed with muscle waste but a different kind before. Right?

0:12:14 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. It was because I was wasting away.

0:12:17 Unknown Speaker #3

W a s t Yeah.

0:12:19 Unknown Speaker #2

Finger body was doing muscle waste. It eating itself and shitting it out.

0:12:22 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. My doctor called me incredibly wasteful, and so I pitch I pitch muscle waste Stan Lee

0:12:29 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:12:29 Unknown Speaker #4

as a a superhero, and they ended up doing a fifteen comic run that it all went directly from the stands into the waste bin. Wow. Because it was the only comic that everyone on earth throughout if they came across from it.

0:12:29 Unknown Speaker #1

mhmm.

0:12:46 Unknown Speaker #3

Wow.

0:12:47 Unknown Speaker #4

Guess how many residuals

0:12:48 Unknown Speaker #2

i suffered muscle waste? Let me guess. Zero

0:12:53 Unknown Speaker #4

you got it, nerd.

0:12:53 Unknown Speaker #2

That's max. I heard.

0:12:55 Unknown Speaker #1

Wow. Well, things are going really great at the gym this week. Again, business is booming. People are coming in community is actually really starting to form, which is something that we were really excited about getting into this. We didn't want it to be the kind of impersonal place where people just come. Do their workout and leave. We wanted people to come and feel like a member of some kind of community similar to the community that we felt we developed at Hamilton High I

0:13:18 Unknown Speaker #2

had no idea how much I was missing this feeling of community. Exactly. When I come to the gym and I put my headphones on as loud as I can. And I see everyone else doing that as well. I'm sure you bump into them shoulder, to shoulder, things like that. You don't even have to talk to these people

0:13:32 Unknown Speaker #2

You're in your right place.

0:13:32 Unknown Speaker #6

to know.

0:13:34 Unknown Speaker #3

It's really fun. We had a great mixer out in the lobby last night. We had a bunch of vendors in. Mhmm. We were testing pollen protein. Beepaline? Yeah. Beepal and and and and flour pollen. A lot of different mixtures of pollen. You're not gonna be able to get your aminos from just one poly.

0:13:55 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, very interesting.

0:13:57 Unknown Speaker #4

When we talk about this stuff, I find myself very interested.

0:13:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes.

0:14:00 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Absolutely. That's

0:14:03 Unknown Speaker #2

how you can tell. Yes. Someone just there's no follow-up question. They just say I'm very interested.

0:14:09 Unknown Speaker #4

You've gotten so into these Paulins these milks telling me that what I eat and drink is wrong, all the time.

0:14:15 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, and your face is so much puffier now. Than it used to be with that kid. Awesome. Well, you know it's

0:14:21 Unknown Speaker #3

a good amino when you sneeze o. And that's and what we've that on banners all over. And, yeah, I mean, you guys have seen the the queen bee Mhmm. The Queen bee is here working out, and the worker bees are around. Mhmm. We

0:14:42 Unknown Speaker #4

very protect if I have to just try to buy the queen and be a drink. And I got stung up and down.

0:14:49 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. You were sent off to the hospital, a mass suicide of me stinging the hell out of you. Isn't that respectable, though?

0:14:58 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. They really will.

0:15:00 Unknown Speaker #2

This is worth it. This is my last try.

0:15:02 Unknown Speaker #4

And then that woman from the Texas b works TikTok came to kind of try to collect collect some of the b's and study them.

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #4

I tried to buy her a drink, and she tried to kill me also.

0:15:09 Unknown Speaker #1

Mhmm.

0:15:15 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. And several of her beekeeper friends came over.

0:15:17 Unknown Speaker #4

They came in. I guess, she the queen of the beekeepers, and she's also softballed. The rest

0:15:22 Unknown Speaker #1

of them are

0:15:22 Unknown Speaker #3

very good. You got sprayed to filth by those little canister.

0:15:28 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. You got sort of puffed out until you couldn't really breathe or walk.

0:15:32 Unknown Speaker #4

You can't buy a lady a drink these days, I guess. But yeah.

0:15:35 Unknown Speaker #3

But it's a really good thing, you know. Those puffers, they work for human beings too. They don't just confuse bees and and make them more docile.

0:15:43 Unknown Speaker #4

I was so Yeah.

0:15:44 Unknown Speaker #2

We kept a couple of puffers just in case someone's going too long on a machine or taking a treadmill too long.

0:15:50 Unknown Speaker #3

I almost got into a bar fight last night, and Sam puffed the shit out of me, and I calmed me down. But that was really nice. So yeah. And

0:15:57 Unknown Speaker #2

and I think we got a couple free drinks. You puff the right guy in a bar. You get a couple free drinks.

0:16:02 Unknown Speaker #4

Absolutely. September.

0:16:05 Unknown Speaker #3

And if you take one drink out of your life per week, you've done the math on this.

0:16:10 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. So say you are an average drink Three to five drinks a week, maybe two to six drinks a night. Right? Right. So That makes sense.

0:16:21 Unknown Speaker #3

Six to nine.

0:16:22 Unknown Speaker #2

It depends. It's average. Right? Right. So if you do

0:16:24 Unknown Speaker #3

the the three plus six

0:16:26 Unknown Speaker #2

x times -- Time. Two minus four.

0:16:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Big pin out.

0:16:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Huge pen. Sorry about the roof.

0:16:34 Unknown Speaker #3

And Clanging around in the rafters up there. No.

0:16:36 Unknown Speaker #2

Let me see.

0:16:37 Unknown Speaker #4

It's just two

0:16:38 Unknown Speaker #2

to six.

0:16:39 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, no.

0:16:40 Unknown Speaker #2

You did it. Every night, that's five days when you first took your pictures.

0:16:43 Unknown Speaker #3

Uh-huh.

0:16:44 Unknown Speaker #2

I hit the funky fixture? Oh, no. Oh, no.

0:16:49 Unknown Speaker #3

Our funky fixture. We paid so much funky fixture. Was really a hit in the Studio fifty four. Mhmm. He was coked out there for years at the studio fifty four. Yeah. Of course. Course. I gotta buy some female fixture.

0:17:07 Unknown Speaker #2

It's a living man.

0:17:08 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Our fit light fixture. Here at the gym is a man who had a coke problem in the seventies and is now providing so much light.

0:17:19 Unknown Speaker #4

She's body has essentially crystallized because all the cocaine. So you spin them up there like a disco ball and life is fresh.

0:17:25 Unknown Speaker #1

As long as you got a light shining on him, he will shoot it everywhere Sorry. We interrupted the math there. What did you figure out the math there?

0:17:30 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, I figured out if you take out one drink a week, you could save your life. Oh, I'll just put that way, I could show you the math if you want to, but it could save your freaky

0:17:38 Unknown Speaker #1

see, I love that. When when a person speaks from replacement authority, says they've done the work, to figure out the truth, and then they just say, trust me.

0:17:47 Unknown Speaker #2

I could show you the math if you'd get it, but I don't wanna waste time.

0:17:52 Unknown Speaker #4

This is the lyrics to your song from Math Laden. Right? I can show you nothing, Matt. If you get it.

0:18:00 Unknown Speaker #2

I could show you, but you wouldn't get it. Trust me, I am on a car bid and I

0:18:09 Unknown Speaker #6

am doing math. A whole new math.

0:18:16 Unknown Speaker #2

Because sometimes my math is new. Not if everybody agrees

0:18:19 Unknown Speaker #3

with it. It doesn't add up, and that's what makes it new.

0:18:22 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Most math is old math all logically make sense like a literal language.

0:18:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Your math goes with the gut sometimes. Exactly. I mean,

0:18:31 Unknown Speaker #2

the gut.

0:18:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Gut health. Gut health.

0:18:36 Unknown Speaker #2

God health is more important than brain health, because I don't know if you noticed the guts at the center. The brain is at the end. The gut tells the brain how to feel.

0:18:45 Unknown Speaker #3

You have to make sure your root is grounded. And you've gotta be in touch with your root -- Yes. -- and your core.

0:18:53 Unknown Speaker #2

This is why I go home and I plant myself every night. Everybody has a root Everybody has a roof that comes out of the back.

0:19:00 Unknown Speaker #1

Instead of a bathtub, you have Instead

0:19:02 Unknown Speaker #2

of a bathtub, I have a dirt pot. And I sit on. And I extend my route down -- Yes.

0:19:07 Unknown Speaker #1

and it

0:19:07 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:19:08 Unknown Speaker #2

makes me feel grounded.

0:19:09 Unknown Speaker #4

I remember when you went you went on to the to your family reunion, you had me come by and water you every week

0:19:15 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:19:15 Unknown Speaker #2

yes.

0:19:16 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:19:16 Unknown Speaker #4

once a week, which

0:19:17 Unknown Speaker #6

was -- Yes. --

0:19:18 Unknown Speaker #4

one of the most physically fusing things. That's like how's he at the reunion, but I'm watering him now.

0:19:22 Unknown Speaker #2

I had to stay rooted. I had

0:19:25 Unknown Speaker #3

to stay rooted. And we we plant Sam every night.

0:19:28 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:19:29 Unknown Speaker #3

And we've been looking over him, and he's really, really starting to branch out some

0:19:35 Unknown Speaker #2

a lot of people are saying, is this real? And I'm saying, of course, have you seen the vein in my forehead? The vein in my forehead is the top of the root. And that goes all the way down and out my butthole, and that goes into the pot. And I'm hoping And this isn't for sure, but I'm hoping because if you point yourself every day. That's five times a week. Alright. You can go

0:19:57 Unknown Speaker #1

back and talk.

0:19:58 Unknown Speaker #3

To be here.

0:20:00 Unknown Speaker #2

Then you get plants coming out of your head Right. I'm sure hooting. I'm hoping that a that I start to leave that I start to have leaves because I get a

0:20:08 Unknown Speaker #1

little propagation.

0:20:09 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. We because we we tried to plant a few trimmings of you

0:20:13 Unknown Speaker #4

mhmm. -- are some clippings just to see if they propagate. And I think we clipped them too young. Yes. But I think we're gonna get Sam's walking around here as we start playing them around.

0:20:13 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:20:22 Unknown Speaker #2

I'm pretty sure. I think we just clip my hair and we need to wait till the hair becomes leaf.

0:20:26 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes.

0:20:26 Unknown Speaker #2

And then we can propagate me.

0:20:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Just imagine I personally love four

0:20:31 Unknown Speaker #2

or five of me

0:20:32 Unknown Speaker #1

walking around. If this gym would be a different place if we had three, four, five of you walking around helping people out.

0:20:37 Unknown Speaker #4

I mean, three, four, five Sam Weatherman's, new ones every day

0:20:40 Unknown Speaker #4

yes. -- in a gym with five floors. I mean, you do the math on that.

0:20:40 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:20:44 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh my God. We can make millions. We can make millions of

0:20:48 Unknown Speaker #2

on my floor.

0:20:48 Unknown Speaker #1

that. I'm

0:20:49 Unknown Speaker #1

And say this. If this process works for you, it might work for the rest of us, and maybe we should try to do it so that that all all four of us could have us a little more efficiency

0:20:57 Unknown Speaker #4

i mean, this does kind of touch on a a thing we've been kinda trying ever since we saw severance and that's the Because you know you want it's you're always wondering, can't there be more of me? Yeah. I can't I separate myself so I've got my work life, my home life, gym life, which is practically my home life now. I'm in

0:21:15 Unknown Speaker #2

my work life.

0:21:15 Unknown Speaker #4

And so we've added the severance floor where we cut your brain in half and you don't remember what's happening. In there. Yeah. And so this We think

0:21:21 Unknown Speaker #2

it's the same science.

0:21:23 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. We're pretty sure. Yeah. I mean, the the we talked to some of the people on the show and they're like, don't do this. It's not real. We're, like, oh, wink. We got it.

0:21:31 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. I mean, Patricia Arquette from severance doesn't run ours. But David Arquette does.

0:21:37 Unknown Speaker #4

Or should we say Boze of the clown, but

0:21:40 Unknown Speaker #3

it's Yes. That's who we should say.

0:21:44 Unknown Speaker #1

It's an exciting it's an exciting experiment. We have a couple of people who volunteered to to try it out. Yes. David's doing a great job overseeing everything.

0:21:52 Unknown Speaker #5

Yes.

0:21:53 Unknown Speaker #1

We don't know what's going on down there, which I think is the most interesting part. It's kinda just they go down there. They do what they do. And then when they come back up, they have no men reevy of it and and But

0:22:01 Unknown Speaker #2

they're sweaty and buff as hell.

0:22:03 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:22:03 Unknown Speaker #2

I mean, they come up with a wicked pump.

0:22:06 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. I I've been trying it out, you know.

0:22:09 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I I I submitted myself for severance. They played me some recordings. I guess my severance self went pretty big with an axe sent. Oh, really? Really? Yeah, which I was a little disappointed to hear. And I don't think he's pulling it off exactly. But that's how we walk around that.

0:22:09 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, have you?

0:22:26 Unknown Speaker #2

Even your severed self isn't respected as an actor. That's really that influenced.

0:22:30 Unknown Speaker #4

But it's getting me buff. I mean, you guys See. I have all arms now.

0:22:33 Unknown Speaker #2

You're extremely armed. Yes. Todd now has one

0:22:36 Unknown Speaker #3

of those bicep that bleeds, you know. It's like somebody's done weird surgery too, and it has a pinhole blood coming out.

0:22:44 Unknown Speaker #2

But it also feels like if you don't bleed it, it's dangerous.

0:22:47 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. You have

0:22:48 Unknown Speaker #3

to leak his arm You gotta leak them off. Speaking of, we do have a leech working at the the the smoothie bar. Who will suck out your toxins at any moment. Yes. Yeah. I I've hired quite a few leeches.

0:23:05 Unknown Speaker #4

And the the science on that is

0:23:09 Unknown Speaker #3

leach is well, it it goes back to a a old medicine,

0:23:14 Unknown Speaker #4

you

0:23:14 Unknown Speaker #3

know, used to Now we the the sacklers are really taking over and I wanna go back to letting live animals suck your blood.

0:23:25 Unknown Speaker #1

What is all is new again? It's it's Yes.

0:23:27 Unknown Speaker #4

We're Zachler's that's my high school hacky sack crew. Yes.

0:23:32 Unknown Speaker #3

And they are bad news.

0:23:33 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Those are some of the baddest words

0:23:36 Unknown Speaker #6

we have.

0:23:37 Unknown Speaker #3

They've gotten they've gotten so much of the Southeast hooked on hacky sack.

0:23:44 Unknown Speaker #1

Southeast Northeast.

0:23:46 Unknown Speaker #3

And really all

0:23:47 Unknown Speaker #4

over all over.

0:23:48 Unknown Speaker #2

You saw the x games this year. It was all hacked.

0:23:50 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. All hacked. It

0:23:51 Unknown Speaker #3

was all hacked.

0:23:53 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, this leech, is it like one of those things where it's like, oh, I think I feel too much talk and in my legs, I'm gonna leech my leg or how does it work? Because I'm a little hesitant to leech

0:24:05 Unknown Speaker #4

right. -- to be totally honest. I don't wanna put something on me that does something that I already do to other people. Right.

0:24:05 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:24:11 Unknown Speaker #2

Right. Who's the host here?

0:24:13 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Who's the host?

0:24:14 Unknown Speaker #3

Well leech is

0:24:16 Unknown Speaker #4

it'll suck his blood if he fucks with

0:24:19 Unknown Speaker #3

right. Right. I mean, like leeches, that that that is true. If you have like a a sort of a a bad leg, you can put it on your your calf and they'll sort of leach out the toxins. It's pretty it's pretty working pretty good.

0:24:33 Unknown Speaker #1

And how how exactly does the leach differentiate between just sort of regular blood and toxins, because I think the thing that would worry me is if you do too much leaching, are you just losing blood? How do they know what's what's the toxin and what's the blood?

0:24:47 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, they're figuring it out on the fly. Oh, no. So I have At least

0:24:53 Unknown Speaker #2

just have very specific taste. Right? They taste some healthy blood. They go

0:24:58 Unknown Speaker #4

oh, yeah. We just spit out your blood. I'll think. I can vouch for that.

0:25:01 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, my leaches are sommeliers. So they kind of, like, swish it around in their mouth. And we actually the the leeches did not love Todd's blood.

0:25:16 Unknown Speaker #4

No. Yeah. They said it they said it had turned. Right.

0:25:21 Unknown Speaker #4

first time I'd seen them spit it out. They swish, they sniffed, And even on the sniff, I was like, oh, this is and you're so nervous when the leech has Of course.

0:25:21 Unknown Speaker #3

It was the

0:25:30 Unknown Speaker #3

Totally. Yeah.

0:25:31 Unknown Speaker #2

You wanna do a faux pas. You don't wanna order the wrong, but the table, you don't wanna have your blood be scoffed at.

0:25:38 Unknown Speaker #3

So you can tell if the leeches turn their nose up to your blood. You're still in bad shape. So you need to continue dieting. You need to continue eating pollen. You need to continue fasting forever. To clean up your blood, And then once the leeches take a big Once they latch. Once they latch, you know you are doing everything right.

0:25:38 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:26:00 Unknown Speaker #2

Bill, it is so important to have you at the gym because I feel like, you know, the three of us were lungs. You know what I mean? Yep. We're here for the physical. We understand how to throw a weight up over your head. But we need the science. Well, if

0:26:12 Unknown Speaker #3

you don't pair diet with working out

0:26:15 Unknown Speaker #2

right.

0:26:15 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:26:16 Unknown Speaker #3

you will see absolutely no results

0:26:16 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:26:18 Unknown Speaker #4

and I'm nodding because I understand what you mean.

0:26:20 Unknown Speaker #6

You

0:26:20 Unknown Speaker #3

know this? Everybody knows. And

0:26:21 Unknown Speaker #2

what do you always say, Bill? Abs are made in the kitchen.

0:26:24 Unknown Speaker #3

Abs are made in the kitchen. Right?

0:26:27 Unknown Speaker #4

Is that are is that what's on the menu?

0:26:30 Unknown Speaker #3

No. No.

0:26:31 Unknown Speaker #2

No. Oh. You're eating a roll. You're you're eating they roll.

0:26:31 Unknown Speaker #4

No. No. No. No.

0:26:36 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, I

0:26:36 Unknown Speaker #4

thought it was human abdominals.

0:26:39 Unknown Speaker #3

Shit. No. That is that's a a six pack of golden corral rolls shaped like a man's torso, which which we are selling. Yes. We are selling them.

0:26:51 Unknown Speaker #2

And so it's Golden Corral. They have a whole new human bar

0:26:54 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:26:55 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah.

0:26:55 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:26:55 Unknown Speaker #2

that is, of course, made to look like a person, then you go in, you grab an abdomen, you grab a foot gotta tell you grab those.

0:27:01 Unknown Speaker #4

And it's well, it's all it it's gonna be tough for them to keep it going because it is all guys named Al. So it's definitely Golden Core Al. And once they run out of house to eat, I don't know if they're gonna like

0:27:13 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:27:14 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:27:14 Unknown Speaker #1

right.

0:27:14 Unknown Speaker #4

maybe corals, you know, but once you go through the real world cast, we're out of people named coral. Yeah.

0:27:20 Unknown Speaker #2

The golden foot owl? I don't know. How many cores of owl

0:27:24 Unknown Speaker #3

are gonna have here?

0:27:25 Unknown Speaker #4

I hear that. Yeah. But a

0:27:26 Unknown Speaker #3

lot of people are showing up and and And we did introduce some typical masculine males into the terrarium.

0:27:35 Unknown Speaker #1

I was gonna I was gonna mention, you know, I I Originally, I thought it was a great idea to sort of expand the quote unquote experiment of the terrarium into the other rack of ball courts We did have a few people sort of step in. And I'll be honest, it was a little bit sort of it made me feel bad.

0:27:54 Unknown Speaker #1

When everyone who was coming by to look at me sort of migrated over to the other terrariums

0:27:54 Unknown Speaker #4

Mhmm.

0:28:00 Unknown Speaker #4

oh, yeah.

0:28:00 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:28:01 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:28:01 Unknown Speaker #1

and in the last week, it has been tough for me to get an audience of any kind. It seems like these new guys are really coming in and changing the game. They're in there doing these insane workouts looking crazy, power ripped. And it's re and and while I got into this, to make myself not be super self conscious. It's starting to feel like I'm getting kinda pushed back down to the bottom of the totem in the terrarium.

0:28:26 Unknown Speaker #4

Howard, this is your chance to become an alpha.

0:28:29 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:28:30 Unknown Speaker #4

You are, you know, you got you you you you cout out to the mouse. True. You cout out to the hamburger fell on your head.

0:28:38 Unknown Speaker #3

The tree, the everything you've baited.

0:28:41 Unknown Speaker #4

But but now you've got these peep these men in here. Who everyone is more interested in.

0:28:45 Unknown Speaker #1

What does that mean? What does being an alpha mean?

0:28:48 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, unfortunately, there's alphas and there's beta.

0:28:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Right.

0:28:52 Unknown Speaker #2

But you have been pushed, unfortunately, to being a Zeta.

0:28:54 Unknown Speaker #3

I was gonna say. You're is you're the z.

0:28:56 Unknown Speaker #2

You're the lowest life form in there. The hamburger is above you.

0:29:00 Unknown Speaker #1

Okay. What do I do? I don't wanna be his burger.

0:29:04 Unknown Speaker #4

You were you were technically being hunted by hamburger. And, of course, is helper.

0:29:13 Unknown Speaker #2

So there's there's the hamburger

0:29:15 Unknown Speaker #3

is helper. And they are They are on your tail at all times. That's probably the biggest the biggest sight period showing up is too much a hamburger bun to get down.

0:29:30 Unknown Speaker #2

We're with it, Albert.

0:29:32 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, the hamburger is nothing less to help her.

0:29:35 Unknown Speaker #2

Which is, of course, a huge anthem from Warver Club.

0:29:38 Unknown Speaker #2

a big shipper. Yes. And he has been slapping you on the ass -- Yeah.

0:29:38 Unknown Speaker #4

We don't have

0:29:42 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:29:42 Unknown Speaker #2

which I think he's trying to motivate you.

0:29:44 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. I feel like everything I feel like all the time.

0:29:47 Unknown Speaker #3

The the helper is telling you is actually not helping the hamburger at all and telling you where the hamburger is.

0:29:53 Unknown Speaker #4

He's become more of a Howard burger home. We

0:29:56 Unknown Speaker #1

don't need burgers in there.

0:29:57 Unknown Speaker #4

How burger?

0:29:58 Unknown Speaker #3

How burger helper?

0:29:59 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, how you better be careful. You might be turned into a goddamn burger sooner than I

0:30:03 Unknown Speaker #1

no. I not gonna be a hamburger girl.

0:30:05 Unknown Speaker #3

If a hamburger grills human eats you,

0:30:08 Unknown Speaker #1

it's not gonna happen. I will

0:30:10 Unknown Speaker #3

for your burger, You might

0:30:11 Unknown Speaker #2

be say it will be it will be a new low if you get drilled by an inanimate hero.

0:30:16 Unknown Speaker #1

I'm not gonna let it happen. This I have to make some changes, and I would love some help.

0:30:21 Unknown Speaker #4

Okay. Well, here

0:30:22 Unknown Speaker #1

i would really love some help.

0:30:24 Unknown Speaker #4

It it's it's one thing to be mild and polite, you know. Yeah. You That's a great personality trait. But if there are things you want in the world, you have to ask for them. You have to state that. You have to take in, you know. Yeah. So if at some point you want people to look at you, every time a stronger man walks by, you can't go hide. What if you

0:30:42 Unknown Speaker #2

have to take the spotlight? What if you took the burger as an example? What if he followed the burgers example? And you got high up.

0:30:49 Unknown Speaker #1

I should just drop on these guys.

0:30:50 Unknown Speaker #2

And jump on an alpha's head because that's what they say in tangent. Prison is where the real alpha beta thing happens. You either gotta beat someone up on your first day or become someone's girlfriend. You could become the burger's girlfriend.

0:31:03 Unknown Speaker #4

God. Prison is so scary. I can't believe it exists and it's so scary. Totally. Wow. Yeah. You're and you're kinda in that situation. So jump on a big guy or even just find like a quarter pounder and jump on it, start small and get bigger.

0:31:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Maybe I'll look for a smash burger. They seem they seem easy to And let's

0:31:22 Unknown Speaker #2

and let's give Howard some credit. He did get punked by a six dollar burger from

0:31:27 Unknown Speaker #4

that was the Carl junior six dollar burger. Yeah. And that is hard to be It is

0:31:31 Unknown Speaker #4

from your six dollar style burger.

0:31:31 Unknown Speaker #3

and Carl

0:31:33 Unknown Speaker #3

It's it is the king of the terrarium, the six dollar burger from Carl's Junior.

0:31:39 Unknown Speaker #4

And it definitely belonged in your face. It would

0:31:44 Unknown Speaker #3

i mean, Char Royal, Beautiful burger.

0:31:49 Unknown Speaker #1

You know what?

0:31:50 Unknown Speaker #3

I'm just -- Yeah.

0:31:51 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:31:51 Unknown Speaker #4

honing you.

0:31:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Just a second.

0:31:53 Unknown Speaker #4

The East Coast, we're talking Hardies, by the way.

0:31:55 Unknown Speaker #2

We're talking oranges on East Coast.

0:31:57 Unknown Speaker #1

Just that you guys are so excited to be talking about these burgers and not talk about your friend, Howard, is is evidence enough that I gotta make some changes. So I'm gonna this week, I'm standing up to the hamburgers.

0:31:57 Unknown Speaker #3

You don't know.

0:32:07 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes.

0:32:08 Unknown Speaker #3

them. Yes.

0:32:08 Unknown Speaker #1

I'm standing up to

0:32:09 Unknown Speaker #1

I'm gonna make a weapon. I'm gonna make a weapon. And I'm gonna stand up to these hamburgers, and I'm gonna put them in their place.

0:32:16 Unknown Speaker #4

Because you're naked and afraid in there. Yeah. Literally. And you you you have just, yeah, fashion yourself -- Yeah.

0:32:22 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:32:22 Unknown Speaker #4

a burger weapon. I mean, is this a tease? Are we gonna find out next week what the weapon is? Or do you have a plan now.

0:32:28 Unknown Speaker #1

I mean, I I've seen a lot of episodes naked in a frame.

0:32:31 Unknown Speaker #3

But they there's a spin off satin pathetic, which you

0:32:35 Unknown Speaker #4

and there

0:32:45 Unknown Speaker #3

which which is getting a ton of viewers. Mhmm. But I just don't understand how you can't out smart these hamburgers.

0:32:55 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, you know, Bill, maybe you should spend a day in the terrarium and then tell me it's easy to to Well,

0:33:00 Unknown Speaker #3

i would if they were beyond burger. If they were beyond burger, I'd be in there. I can't be in there with with with those fast food meals. Right. That I don't eat that stuff.

0:33:12 Unknown Speaker #2

Right. Right.

0:33:13 Unknown Speaker #3

I mean, now, of course, he raw liver and stuff that's higher in iron.

0:33:18 Unknown Speaker #2

That's not fast food. No. How are we're we're pulling for you?

0:33:23 Unknown Speaker #2

And if you need a piece of lettuce or a piece of cheese to sort of look like the hamburger for a day, that will help you out with

0:33:23 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:33:31 Unknown Speaker #1

i'll do a bait. I'll do I'll I'll use myself as space. Like, this all would look like a hamburger.

0:33:36 Unknown Speaker #3

What can kill a hamburger? It's very obvious. What kills Paper is killed by rock, which is also killed by scissors. Mhmm. It's so clear. Cesar kills rock. What kills hamburger? Chicken finger. Chicken finger. Anytime you see hamburger chicken finger, chicken finger.

0:34:09 Unknown Speaker #4

We gotta turn you into a chicken finger.

0:34:11 Unknown Speaker #1

Now, Sam, you've done that before. What's that process?

0:34:13 Unknown Speaker #2

Honestly, it's a nightmare. I would

0:34:15 Unknown Speaker #4

not recommend that. Now finger or tender.

0:34:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Either one. Or nugget.

0:34:20 Unknown Speaker #4

Or nuggets.

0:34:21 Unknown Speaker #3

Fingerton did not get What?

0:34:23 Unknown Speaker #2

Just because Howard was beat by a bird doesn't mean he has to play their game. I think being a human with a largemouth is a good way.

0:34:33 Unknown Speaker #1

I'm gonna eat this motherfucker.

0:34:35 Unknown Speaker #3

I love to have. That's what we're talking about.

0:34:37 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, you haven't had protein in weeks to be good for you.

0:34:40 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. Your teeth are rotting away on that lettuce.

0:34:44 Unknown Speaker #3

You've been hiding under that mossy rock. You need to get out and eat that burger.

0:34:48 Unknown Speaker #2

I wanna say props to you, Howard, because You've been in a really tough situation. Yes. But you're starting to you're naked and afraid and sound pathetic. But you're starting to develop a tough skin. Almost an exoskeleton on your back. Almost.

0:35:03 Unknown Speaker #1

Well, yes, that I mean, I actually what did wanna I did wanna say that you are not mistaken. You are seeing me develop a sort of

0:35:11 Unknown Speaker #3

an eggs and

0:35:12 Unknown Speaker #1

mosquitoes. There's I've been sort of, like, cowering underneath this rock for so long.

0:35:17 Unknown Speaker #3

And you're familiar with an exomous skeleton. Right?

0:35:19 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, yeah. I I mean, there's exoskeleton, and then there's exomous skeleton. And I am the latter, which, of course, they used to influence skeletons in every movie ever. Right.

0:35:29 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. Right.

0:35:30 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. But, no, I I have been sort of hiding in that mossy rock, and there is a bit of a drip. And the water is has something going on in it and it has sort of made me develop this sort of hard crust on my back. Okay.

0:35:42 Unknown Speaker #2

Cussifying on your back. You're in developing a shell.

0:35:44 Unknown Speaker #1

A bit a bit but I don't think it's gonna be an issue. Because I'm not gonna cower anymore. I'm not gonna hide in this mossy rock. I'm gonna eat this hamburger and I'm gonna become the alpha of my terrarium.

0:35:56 Unknown Speaker #3

I mean, the terrarium is getting really dirty because I refuse to use any cleaning supplies that actually work.

0:36:02 Unknown Speaker #2

And I use will that tell?

0:36:03 Unknown Speaker #3

I use organic cleaning supplies. Yeah. They don't work at all.

0:36:07 Unknown Speaker #3

And they don't clean up. They they leave stink Here's

0:36:07 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh.

0:36:10 Unknown Speaker #2

what I do. I because I've taken your note. All I do is a little bit of vinegar, barely diluted with water.

0:36:16 Unknown Speaker #3

That's all you need.

0:36:16 Unknown Speaker #2

Makes the whole place stink attracts flies and keeps it clean his head.

0:36:20 Unknown Speaker #4

You can do vinegar on anything, brush your teeth, wash your hair, it's the clean ew.

0:36:25 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. I do vinegar colognes when I go out on a date, I'm

0:36:28 Unknown Speaker #3

already Yes. All you need to clean heaps and heaps of used towels and hand towels at the gym is a handful of vinegar and a little bit of baking soda.

0:36:37 Unknown Speaker #2

And do not get me started on bottoms. Handful is enough.

0:36:41 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. You feel Click a little bit of vinegar in the water and, you know, we are the the towels have started to fuse into one And Oh, yeah. Now you gotta

0:36:54 Unknown Speaker #4

sign up to use a portion of the big towel.

0:36:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. And I do. I mean and I don't I I don't care about this. I don't care. But I do feel like the big towel has a heartbeat.

0:37:07 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, I don't I don't care.

0:37:09 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, I don't care. It doesn't affect us, necessarily

0:37:12 Unknown Speaker #2

bother me, but it does, like, interest me.

0:37:14 Unknown Speaker #3

It's interesting. It's interesting. But hey.

0:37:18 Unknown Speaker #2

If that change, the law. Like, are we? It's parents? Right. Like, is it need to be registered for school.

0:37:27 Unknown Speaker #4

I I I very

0:37:29 Unknown Speaker #3

is it Is it need education? Right.

0:37:35 Unknown Speaker #4

So are we gonna parent the big towel? Are we gonna let it grow on its own and see what happens? I don't know.

0:37:41 Unknown Speaker #2

A lot of people say adversity is good for a child. Towel.

0:37:44 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. Maybe just throw it out on its own and let it learn, like, of course my new favorite movie, The Northman, where the guys are so buff and bloody. It is so cool.

0:37:52 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes.

0:37:53 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh my god. These men look awesome. Mhmm.

0:37:55 Unknown Speaker #3

If muslims covered in blood, sign me up.

0:37:58 Unknown Speaker #4

Sign me

0:37:59 Unknown Speaker #3

up. Hot hot hot hot hot hot.

0:38:00 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Well, I I I think it's gonna work out.

0:38:03 Unknown Speaker #2

I'm so sorry. Go ahead.

0:38:04 Unknown Speaker #4

I I will go ahead yourself.

0:38:06 Unknown Speaker #2

Speaking of hot hot hot hot. Hot hot hot hot hot. Is being at the gym lately making anybody feel a little bit erotic.

0:38:14 Unknown Speaker #4

My testosterone is up, and I feel

0:38:16 Unknown Speaker #2

your testosterone your testosterone is Well, we all know that Todd most of Todd's body rejects testosterone, but his toe that makes it.

0:38:31 Unknown Speaker #4

But yeah. I've got testosterone.

0:38:33 Unknown Speaker #3

We've been milking his toe, like, it's a rattlesnake to get Venom control, not opposite Venom,

0:38:41 Unknown Speaker #2

not antidote.

0:38:45 Unknown Speaker #4

I was the anime k Anadoke. Anadoke. Yeah. So I bring in my big toe and everybody gives it a little Pull on the nails

0:38:54 Unknown Speaker #4

mhmm. -- because my nails do fang out like a snake's mouth.

0:38:54 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:38:57 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh my god. Yes. And it's Well, you're taught your toe for a while had you in a Anaconda style submission hold. Right? It was crazy.

0:39:05 Unknown Speaker #4

For a while, my whole life, I feel like.

0:39:09 Unknown Speaker #2

That is kind of a cool move, though, when you can still there into a room instead of walk because your toes got you in a hole. Most of the

0:39:16 Unknown Speaker #3

time, Todd's toe is dragging him around the city, sort of, like, looking for a cool place to rest.

0:39:22 Unknown Speaker #4

It's really awesome. But when you enter a room like snake, all eyes are on you. And you go right now, I'm trying to find this little boy, Harry Potter. And finally kill him. Because, you know, I killed his family, which was awesome.

0:39:37 Unknown Speaker #4

But I still gotta kill this little boy here. And I card his little face, and I he's dead. He's dead soon enough. Mhmm.

0:39:37 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah.

0:39:45 Unknown Speaker #2

Can I say your your plastic surgery on your nose looks fantastic?

0:39:49 Unknown Speaker #4

Can you tell her how

0:39:51 Unknown Speaker #2

finally, it's just smooth.

0:39:52 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Smooth face is the way to go.

0:39:57 Unknown Speaker #3

You have no they've actually been testing your face miles per hour out on the salt flats. Is that right? See how fast it

0:40:05 Unknown Speaker #4

so yeah. So it's so smooth. What what'll happen is they get a professional writer on me.

0:40:11 Unknown Speaker #2

Uh-huh.

0:40:12 Unknown Speaker #4

And they take me through this offense, and they are getting record times over and over

0:40:17 Unknown Speaker #4

mhmm. -- and over. And, yeah, it hurts like hell.

0:40:17 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:40:21 Unknown Speaker #2

But you're proud too. You're proud I'm

0:40:23 Unknown Speaker #4

so proud to be the

0:40:24 Unknown Speaker #1

first case.

0:40:24 Unknown Speaker #3

Because there's a BMW v eight pushing you at about six hundred miles an hour on the saw flats, and you are tearing apart out there.

0:40:30 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. I ripped the pieces. Well and if it the b the BMW, it's a v eight with a hemi. Does that make sense.

0:40:38 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Then of course.

0:40:39 Unknown Speaker #4

And then they threw they threw a hammy on me.

0:40:41 Unknown Speaker #3

A hammy.

0:40:42 Unknown Speaker #4

And so I am oinking my way down. Is that right? Wow. Wow. Yeah. But, yeah, I I I all that to say from my my testosterone, I am feeling erotic.

0:40:55 Unknown Speaker #4

I I leave the gym feeling so hot.

0:40:55 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes.

0:40:58 Unknown Speaker #2

I feel pumped in more ways than one I

0:40:59 Unknown Speaker #3

mean, you

0:40:59 Unknown Speaker #4

can't get that car

0:41:01 Unknown Speaker #2

you penis.

0:41:04 Unknown Speaker #3

Guess anybody didn't know. Withouting about phone as we got them. We're rock. We're rock.

0:41:17 Unknown Speaker #2

That's the best part about working out is the pump it gives you in every part of your life. Your heart's working, everything's working.

0:41:24 Unknown Speaker #3

You can't get this many peak humans in a room and not have them get a little erotic.

0:41:30 Unknown Speaker #4

I got the thing. You know how, like, your we, if you ever play not your We we, but you're you play we, and it's like, alright, you're playing video games for a while. Maybe you should go outside. I've been getting that from pornhub now. Where a little warning will come up and it's like, alright. Maybe go take a walk

0:41:45 Unknown Speaker #2

or something. There is nothing more masculine than jacking off all the words.

0:41:53 Unknown Speaker #3

There's nothing more masculine than being addicted to pornography.

0:41:59 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, I think I could one up you telling the women that they're beautiful in the comments. Oh, my god. God. God.

0:42:07 Unknown Speaker #2

Among me.

0:42:07 Unknown Speaker #4

That's a man's move. Right?

0:42:09 Unknown Speaker #3

You gotta comment on porn. They're gonna see it. They're gonna see it. They're gonna talk

0:42:14 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, folks, we're charged up. I think we need to take a little bit of a break. Yeah. If you can give me a little shooter from the bar, I think that would really help calm you.

0:42:14 Unknown Speaker #6

to you.

0:42:23 Unknown Speaker #3

Absolutely. Absolutely.

0:42:25 Unknown Speaker #1

We Are you guys doing twelve shots now?

0:42:27 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yeah. But a lot of people don't know we're doing b two. B two k, b two k shots. Bam, boom, boom, boom, and you can take a bump, bump a bitch a gay. So you'll snort up a little line of b two k -- Mhmm.

0:42:43 Unknown Speaker #3

and and, yeah, you'll you'll it really gets you Alright. It's leg day.

0:42:43 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:42:47 Unknown Speaker #4

Do you have any of the the tree paw in like in a I don't want the swallowable. Do you have an a chewable? Yes.

0:42:56 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes. Yeah. Here, just try this. See, that's how you know it's working. That's how you know it's working at NGI. ITI's and an achoo. Achooable. Go ahead. Take more.

0:43:10 Unknown Speaker #2

I gotta go try one of those. Let's let's come back in a sec.

0:43:13 Unknown Speaker #1

Alright, folks. Thanks so much for sticking out through the break there. You know, we've we mentioned previously that there was a couple businesses up above the gym that we were trying to sort of week out a orphanage and a nonprofit. And we finally managed this week to get those fuckers to get out of here.

0:43:31 Unknown Speaker #2

They hung on tough,

0:43:32 Unknown Speaker #1

but They hung on tough. But we we sort of hardballed them, told them we were gonna make as much noise as we could to sort of make their lives more difficult, and they decided to just Leaf voluntarily. We're really excited, though, because we sort of put out a a sort of classified ad in the newspaper posted online and got a bunch of submissions of businesses that that wanted to take over the space that we we are sort of the gatekeepers for, which is great. We own the whole building now.

0:43:59 Unknown Speaker #4

Half the space because we did need space. So we're using half of it to store our heaviest cookies. Mhmm. Our heaviest weights up

0:44:06 Unknown Speaker #1

there. Yes, right.

0:44:08 Unknown Speaker #4

On the kind of flimsy half

0:44:10 Unknown Speaker #1

and

0:44:10 Unknown Speaker #4

then the other half, we still we realized, oh, okay. We do have a lot of space. So we'd love some business Well, we've

0:44:15 Unknown Speaker #2

been disagreeing on what kind of business we want in there. Some of us want an eatery. Some of us want retail. Some of us want residential.

0:44:24 Unknown Speaker #1

Right. We just want chiropractic stick. Right. We we didn't we we couldn't decide really what we wanted. So we we just sort of guess and then as what? Possible. Yes. Which are interestingly enough, Bill, the first submission on the stack here. We have a Exxon Aksaw wants to get in up there.

0:44:45 Unknown Speaker #3

I was hoping we could build some sort of ramp up there. Yeah. They actually gas is huge right

0:44:51 Unknown Speaker #4

now.

0:44:52 Unknown Speaker #3

Gas is king.

0:44:54 Unknown Speaker #1

The big issue though, and I and and I don't know. We'd have to talk to them about it or maybe we have a solution for it. I don't know how you'd put pumps on the fifteenth floor, or how you get a car a car a car a car repair.

0:45:06 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, the ramp.

0:45:07 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Well, yeah. I get it.

0:45:08 Unknown Speaker #3

Well, the ramp. Okay. So Well,

0:45:10 Unknown Speaker #2

it's gonna be a tougher one, but I think it's a it's a very sexy business. We all agree.

0:45:14 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. We have

0:45:15 Unknown Speaker #3

gas is back. Gas.

0:45:16 Unknown Speaker #2

good. Back, and it's it's easier than it's

0:45:16 Unknown Speaker #1

Gas is

0:45:18 Unknown Speaker #3

never been sexier.

0:45:19 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. I mean, the yeah. The the biggest thing Being

0:45:22 Unknown Speaker #3

part of the global global conversation of barrel. Yeah.

0:45:25 Unknown Speaker #1

And and the cool thing to me the cool thing to me, there was a there was a moment in time where we were like, the government's gonna come in. They're gonna make it harder to be in the gas business. The green like, green energy is coming back, but then all of a sudden, the government was like, actually, no. We like gas again. We're gonna we're gonna continue to like gas forever. Well you

0:45:43 Unknown Speaker #4

got two choices at this point. We are fucked folks. Yeah. It's over.

0:45:48 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah.

0:45:49 Unknown Speaker #4

So Do you wanna scream about it and live your life righteously? Or do you wanna get as rich as the fuckers and get on

0:45:56 Unknown Speaker #1

board? Yes.

0:45:57 Unknown Speaker #4

Gas is back. Yeah.

0:45:59 Unknown Speaker #3

Use gas people. Use

0:46:01 Unknown Speaker #2

it. Use gas. Also, use

0:46:04 Unknown Speaker #3

gas is The gas that spills out of your car

0:46:10 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:46:10 Unknown Speaker #1

yes.

0:46:11 Unknown Speaker #3

you can reuse We go around. We get old orange lawn mower gas cans that have been in garages for sixty, seventy years.

0:46:11 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:46:20 Unknown Speaker #1

Gas has turned.

0:46:21 Unknown Speaker #3

We don't know. The gas has turned. But it's all always just

0:46:23 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:46:23 Unknown Speaker #3

gas gas. -- gas gas gas gas gas. We've always known that.

0:46:27 Unknown Speaker #4

So, yeah, that's what that's what we're thinking is to kind of Maybe as a a way to kinda compromise. Some people don't think we should have gas station, some people -- Yeah.

0:46:37 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:46:37 Unknown Speaker #4

do. The compromises we're thinking maybe a used Thriff gas station.

0:46:41 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. Yes. Consignment gas. Consignment gas. Yeah.

0:46:44 Unknown Speaker #4

All the you know, it'll it'll generally be the ideal will be like, oh, this is a Thriff gas station for people who can't afford more expensive guests. Right.

0:46:52 Unknown Speaker #4

really what's gonna happen is very wealthy people in their twenties are going to shop there to be cool -- Yes.

0:46:52 Unknown Speaker #1

But

0:46:58 Unknown Speaker #4

and drive the prices up. The people that it was originally for.

0:46:58 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:47:01 Unknown Speaker #2

As part of the race to the bottom, there's a lot of profit to

0:47:04 Unknown Speaker #4

be Absolutely. A lot

0:47:05 Unknown Speaker #2

of profit to And

0:47:06 Unknown Speaker #3

you guys actually just skimmed the top of the ocean and get seven thousand gallons a

0:47:10 Unknown Speaker #1

day. Hundred percent. At all. Seven thousand. Is that math accurate?

0:47:14 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. Well, how much you just give me given two hours a day.

0:47:16 Unknown Speaker #4

There's seven oceans.

0:47:17 Unknown Speaker #2

Seven oceans, a gallon an hour per day. You do this time. Seven oceans. That's fourteen times twenty four. Yeah. You could do that. Yeah. Yeah. I'd say you could do that.

0:47:26 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. So we gas is an option, but, you know,

0:47:29 Unknown Speaker #3

gas on the fifteenth floor Fifteenth floor gas

0:47:31 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:47:32 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:47:32 Unknown Speaker #3

is what we're where

0:47:32 Unknown Speaker #1

yeah.

0:47:33 Unknown Speaker #2

they gave called.

0:47:34 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. But but, you know, there's lots of different sort of submissions here in the stack. Let's go through them here. Do we

0:47:39 Unknown Speaker #3

have a food submission.

0:47:40 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, we have a couple food summaries here. Yeah.

0:47:42 Unknown Speaker #2

Dick slash resort. I really want the Dick slash resort in there because I figure if we get good enough people making fun of you, while you're ordering food, maybe they could double dip and come down and be a trainer.

0:47:55 Unknown Speaker #1

This is I love those kind of restaurants where they make the whole thing that their mean to you. I think it's so funny. Mhmm.

0:48:01 Unknown Speaker #4

And so you you you think that the mean waiters could come down and train. What I think is you really focus at Dick's last resort on people's bodies. Mhmm. And that's what you insult and they go as well. I may be able to get a a membership.

0:48:14 Unknown Speaker #2

That's right. Because everybody else

0:48:16 Unknown Speaker #1

around the middle there, maybe go down and do some crunches.

0:48:19 Unknown Speaker #2

Take last resort is not just a tourist trap. It is a desk destination. People will come from all over to go get some of the worst food and get treated like shit, and then they'll trickle down to the gym.

0:48:31 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. It's I mean, it's rigonomics. Exactly. It's rude rigonomics.

0:48:35 Unknown Speaker #1

I

0:48:35 Unknown Speaker #3

mean, is there a possibility where they try to serve good food, and the patrons make fun of the food.

0:48:42 Unknown Speaker #5

Uh-huh. And that's interesting. Because

0:48:44 Unknown Speaker #3

that's when I like to do it like a McDonald's Right? I do opposite dicks and I go and I go, what is this shit? Why are you working here? Yeah. This is disgusting. I

0:48:52 Unknown Speaker #3

little job.

0:48:52 Unknown Speaker #2

like to find the

0:48:53 Unknown Speaker #4

You go check.

0:48:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Tired minimum wage worker I can and then make fun of them because of where they're working.

0:48:59 Unknown Speaker #4

Okay. So waiters last resort is maybe what we would call it.

0:49:03 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Waiters last resort. Should be real I think they could be nice.

0:49:07 Unknown Speaker #2

That's actually a great idea.

0:49:08 Unknown Speaker #3

Turn it on its head, make fun of the staff, and the server.

0:49:11 Unknown Speaker #1

There are some other food options. I do see Burger King's actually trying to move in here.

0:49:16 Unknown Speaker #2

Did that get slipped in? That wasn't part of the

0:49:18 Unknown Speaker #3

the That's handwritten. Completely handwritten.

0:49:21 Unknown Speaker #4

We should because that might make some people life way easier. What is the

0:49:24 Unknown Speaker #2

picture on there? Because the face is blurry, but the crown is crystal clear. Looks familiar.

0:49:30 Unknown Speaker #4

what they submitted, like, a headshot of the burger king, but they've learned the facts.

0:49:30 Unknown Speaker #3

So

0:49:35 Unknown Speaker #2

Something like that.

0:49:36 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, I don't know. I like, let's say somebody spends a lot of time at the gym, does a podcast there, but also works at Burger King. But the closest one right now is is across town and this person happens to have a Flintstone's car, so it works to speak to try to get to work so fast.

0:49:51 Unknown Speaker #1

Tom, you have a Flintstone's car. We seen

0:49:53 Unknown Speaker #4

you. No.

0:49:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Wooden. He's not the only one though.

0:49:56 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Yeah. There's Barney's got one.

0:50:00 Unknown Speaker #2

You're the only flesh. You're the only human flesh person who has one.

0:50:03 Unknown Speaker #4

Is Bambam not human flesh? Is he like

0:50:05 Unknown Speaker #2

his dad? I think he's a cartoon like his dad.

0:50:07 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, he sure fights like a humanist. A kid beats the shit out of me with this little bat every day. That's sad. But it's a living.

0:50:15 Unknown Speaker #2

It's living freedom. It is a living.

0:50:18 Unknown Speaker #2

But you're getting residuals for that.

0:50:18 Unknown Speaker #4

But yeah.

0:50:20 Unknown Speaker #4

For getting beaten up by the Flintstones kids?

0:50:22 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. On a cartoon.

0:50:23 Unknown Speaker #4

Let me check my mail. I've got an app here that tells me what my mail is. No. Damn.

0:50:31 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, I feel like

0:50:32 Unknown Speaker #3

that was you, Todd, and you're trying to get a shorter commute to Burger King, where you work,

0:50:38 Unknown Speaker #4

wow, I have never felt so accused. Me work at Burger here. Me, a man who is bringing in so much money with his Jim play what is men or what are men, a free play where you donate please.

0:50:54 Unknown Speaker #2

Which I think is such An important artistic question.

0:50:58 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:50:58 Unknown Speaker #2

What is or what are men -- Mhmm.

0:51:01 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:51:01 Unknown Speaker #2

what word should we use there?

0:51:02 Unknown Speaker #4

Yes. That is part of the question of the whole thing, is a lot of the play is just about grammar. Mhmm. What how were was I supposed to title this? I just both. And so you can pay this is a play where you pay to leave. And so I'm making a ton of money off of this play because people will come.

0:51:18 Unknown Speaker #3

Right. I love that philosophy of having a thing be free, but encouraging donation -- Mhmm.

0:51:25 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:51:25 Unknown Speaker #3

because I don't want to know what I need to pay. Mhmm. I want it to be fake. I want it to, like, operate on my Gill. I like that.

0:51:36 Unknown Speaker #1

I always I like looking into a donation bucket, seeing change and also a fifty dollar bill.

0:51:41 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. And

0:51:42 Unknown Speaker #1

just being like, well, what the hell?

0:51:43 Unknown Speaker #3

And then leaving feeling like you are good,

0:51:46 Unknown Speaker #2

you know. Yeah. There's nothing like being surprised with a choice. You know what I mean?

0:51:52 Unknown Speaker #2

I don't want to know that I'm gonna have to pay. I want it to be a freaking surprise and that I have to guiltfully do it at the end.

0:51:52 Unknown Speaker #3

Yes.

0:51:57 Unknown Speaker #3

But I hate knowing what I'm going into ever. Like what I'm signing up for, I don't wanna know.

0:52:03 Unknown Speaker #4

No. All my birthday parties, I b c c the invite list.

0:52:09 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, that's good. That's good. That's good. That's good.

0:52:10 Unknown Speaker #2

It's really smart.

0:52:11 Unknown Speaker #1

Surprise party for everybody.

0:52:13 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. You're out. You show up and you're absolutely like, oh,

0:52:17 Unknown Speaker #3

and you have a lot of different groups of friends, so anyone could be there.

0:52:21 Unknown Speaker #4

A lot of different groups. Don't bring it well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I come friends. Yeah.

0:52:25 Unknown Speaker #3

You're the types of you're the type of person that when we hang out with you, we're like, your friends with them? Why? Like, weren't we done with them years ago? Why? You're still doing that? I like that about your part.

0:52:43 Unknown Speaker #4

Because he's a commercial director, and you never know if he's gonna put me in one. Right.

0:52:48 Unknown Speaker #2

Right. Well, you're also BCC by the party planner. So you've got no idea what's going on going into the party.

0:52:53 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, yeah. I hire a party planner to do it all blind. And so it's I BCC everything in my life. Mhmm.

0:53:02 Unknown Speaker #3

But the cool thing is there's no room in your fridge and all the drink sit out on the counter?

0:53:12 Unknown Speaker #4

And it is BYOP. Of course. And it's not just that if you open the fridge, a couple things fall out. If you gotta try to figure out how to get it back in and how to even fit there in the first

0:53:23 Unknown Speaker #2

well, but at least you have a bone dry, Brenda, that takes up three quarters

0:53:28 Unknown Speaker #4

of three

0:53:29 Unknown Speaker #1

quarters of

0:53:29 Unknown Speaker #3

the British. The whole time. And no matter no matter what party you throw, hot dogs have always been cooked four hours early.

0:53:41 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, I think I love your party. For me, for me, I think we're being too upfront with what the business will be. I think we should make it a mystery, bitch.

0:53:52 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. We all

0:53:53 Unknown Speaker #2

you ran Airheads? Interesting. The most interesting area. The most interesting airhead is the white one because you don't know what flavor it is.

0:54:03 Unknown Speaker #1

It's been the same flavor for fifteen to twenty years

0:54:06 Unknown Speaker #2

that I'm fascinated to this demo.

0:54:09 Unknown Speaker #3

I'm always confused. I don't know.

0:54:10 Unknown Speaker #1

Burger King is for sure not gonna be it. I don't think we can have fast food at the gym. I think that's a bad I'll

0:54:15 Unknown Speaker #4

kill you. I'll fucking kill you.

0:54:18 Unknown Speaker #3

Is it not easy?

0:54:19 Unknown Speaker #2

Take it easy. Take you.

0:54:20 Unknown Speaker #4

Following asleep on the wall,

0:54:21 Unknown Speaker #3

falling asleep on the wall.

0:54:24 Unknown Speaker #2

Todd. Come on.

0:54:26 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, Jesus.

0:54:26 Unknown Speaker #3

Get up.

0:54:28 Unknown Speaker #4

Hey. Sorry. I freaked out. Yeah.

0:54:29 Unknown Speaker #1

He freaked out.

0:54:31 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, I'm just I'm a little low on money lately for no reason.

0:54:34 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. No. Me too. No reason because the gym is doing really well,

0:54:37 Unknown Speaker #4

but my

0:54:38 Unknown Speaker #3

main job is at capacity. Yeah. You gotta line out the door. Yes. It's like a club.

0:54:41 Unknown Speaker #2

We haven't figured out how to train for any of the money from the group gym account to our individual accounts.

0:54:47 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah.

0:54:48 Unknown Speaker #2

So while I'm at the gym, I'm living high on the hog. But when I'm at home I say I don't have a scent to my name.

0:54:54 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Well, we obviously started a business in the name Elon Musk. LLC

0:55:00 Unknown Speaker #2

mhmm.

0:55:00 Unknown Speaker #4

because we thought that they would maybe accidentally donate money into our account when he was doing stuff. But now they think like, oh, these guys are trying to steal money from Elon Musk. So we can never take money out of

0:55:00 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:55:10 Unknown Speaker #1

our account. Our bank account has been federal frozen by the federal government.

0:55:14 Unknown Speaker #2

But somehow our taxes are ridiculous -- Yeah.

0:55:18 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:55:18 Unknown Speaker #2

as if we are Elon Musk.

0:55:20 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. We're we're we're paying Elon's taxes

0:55:23 Unknown Speaker #4

yeah. -- but getting none of our own money. So please bring your business here if you have submissions.

0:55:23 Unknown Speaker #6

--

0:55:28 Unknown Speaker #2

Yes. Well, needless to say we're open to submissions. If you have a good business, that you think fits above a thriving gym, with a little terrarium in it.

0:55:36 Unknown Speaker #1

I know

0:55:37 Unknown Speaker #2

that is not.

0:55:38 Unknown Speaker #1

Mercedes has has asked if they could say our dealership up there, which I feel like might be a good idea.

0:55:44 Unknown Speaker #4

That's kinda cool. Nice crazy shit.

0:55:46 Unknown Speaker #1

And listen, we and listen, all the heavyweights are on the flimsy side. So if you put the cars on the other side, there's no chance that the that the roofs will cave in. I think a car dealership's a great idea also, because we know those things are our money. Like, there's

0:56:03 Unknown Speaker #4

money. Oh, yeah.

0:56:04 Unknown Speaker #2

They'll pay rent to be on the We're taking commissions

0:56:06 Unknown Speaker #1

too on every we we put it in the contract, and we get commission on every car that cell?

0:56:10 Unknown Speaker #4

I could tell by the way that the people I bought my car from are desperately calling and emailing me to buy my car from me that they are doing very well.

0:56:18 Unknown Speaker #1

Yes. It's hard. It's just right now.

0:56:21 Unknown Speaker #3

Our leadership are killing it. Yes. They're like, we're gonna overpay.

0:56:24 Unknown Speaker #1

We're gonna use pay me.

0:56:25 Unknown Speaker #4

Please just bring please, won't give you anything. Just bring your fucking car back.

0:56:28 Unknown Speaker #1

Bring it back Please look

0:56:29 Unknown Speaker #4

at what condition this is.

0:56:30 Unknown Speaker #1

We will pay you what you paid for it, and we years later.

0:56:34 Unknown Speaker #3

We've been taking computer chips and hyperconductors up to the fifteenth floor and just destroying. Yeah. So there's a lot.

0:56:40 Unknown Speaker #1

Like the letter mid where it would throw a TV off the top of the place.

0:56:44 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Yes. We are burning hyperconductors in a cauldron up there to keep the supply low and the demand high. That's the business I think

0:56:53 Unknown Speaker #2

we should have above the gym is the Letterman sandwich guy. We should have him build a little deli up there, and then Letterman will come by all time.

0:57:01 Unknown Speaker #4

Oh, and there's room for that. That's big money. That's big beard. I would love People

0:57:05 Unknown Speaker #2

who go to the gym love letterman. Yes.

0:57:08 Unknown Speaker #4

We've got look. We've got letterman on nonstop after day.

0:57:12 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. People who go to the gym love rye comedy.

0:57:16 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. Root beard is getting ripped as hell at the gym. Oh, yes. Your your ponytail and his beard actually did some sparring the other

0:57:27 Unknown Speaker #4

yeah. My ponytail went ten with Letterman's beard.

0:57:30 Unknown Speaker #2

Oh, man. Congratulations.

0:57:32 Unknown Speaker #1

That's huge. Nobody's done that

0:57:33 Unknown Speaker #2

with another year. And, of course, Paul Schaeffer, which they're holding the card in the beginning.

0:57:42 Unknown Speaker #1

My god.

0:57:42 Unknown Speaker #4

I gotta say thank you to Schaeffer. We really had to talk him into that. You really didn't wanna do it.

0:57:49 Unknown Speaker #3

So long of us with him in the gray room just wear it.

0:57:52 Unknown Speaker #4

They were like we could at least wear it's your sunglasses still here. It's like then he hit the keyboard, he was like, I mean, Well, let me please folks. Let us know if you have a business you wanna put above our gym. Right now, it seems like we're all eating burger king.

0:58:08 Unknown Speaker #1

No, Todd.

0:58:09 Unknown Speaker #2

But maybe, maybe.

0:58:10 Unknown Speaker #1

I feel I I'm leaning car dealership if I'm being honest. I love cars. Yeah.

0:58:14 Unknown Speaker #3

Card dealership gas station. Some it in there.

0:58:16 Unknown Speaker #2

Yeah. It's all mystery business. Maybe your heads. I don't know. Eric. A

0:58:20 Unknown Speaker #4

business where every day you walk in and you don't know what it is.

0:58:22 Unknown Speaker #3

Airhead's mystery log.

0:58:25 Unknown Speaker #4

But I I actually it's a time for my two thirty pickup game slash performance. So I got Yeah.

0:58:33 Unknown Speaker #3

Oh, yeah. You were you were cold clocked in rehearsal yesterday by by a guy on a fast break. Right?

0:58:41 Unknown Speaker #4

That's right. I well, I was in the middle of the what is man or what are men, end of the second act monologue. And I was just very in the moment and so I couldn't hear him saying, man on man on. Clear the court loser.

0:58:56 Unknown Speaker #2

Well, this makes so much sense for your play because you get knocked out by someone doing a layup, and it's like, hey. What is man?

0:59:05 Unknown Speaker #4

Wait. Exactly. What is that? I woke up I woke up six hours later and said that only one guy had stuck around couldn't afford to pay to leave. And so I delivered that line, and I think he liked it.

0:59:15 Unknown Speaker #2

And he's alive for now. Right?

0:59:16 Unknown Speaker #3

There are so many people

0:59:18 Unknown Speaker #2

stuck in the gym. Yes. But we're thriving, and you just gotta see it to believe it. Come on down to the fifteenth Street, fitness wellness center. And come get fit and well.

0:59:29 Unknown Speaker #1

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

0:59:31 Unknown Speaker #4

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

0:59:32 Unknown Speaker #2

It's fine. Everything's fine. And we're obviously driving.

0:59:35 Unknown Speaker #4

Great.

0:59:35 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We're act capacity, but come on down.

0:59:37 Unknown Speaker #2

We're at capacity. We haven't figured out the financials.

0:59:39 Unknown Speaker #4

Well, this is a bit another episode of the teachers of science. Thanks again. To friend of the show, and most regular guest Howard loves for

0:59:46 Unknown Speaker #3

being here. Thank you for being here. It means a lot.

0:59:49 Unknown Speaker #2

You've been a decent guest once again.

0:59:51 Unknown Speaker #3

Yeah. We'll get to your plug neck time.

0:59:56 Unknown Speaker #4

Howard came on eleven seasons ago because you wanted to plug it. Like something that's been over.

1:00:02 Unknown Speaker #2

What did you wanna deploy?

1:00:04 Unknown Speaker #1

Oh, yeah.