knock knock hello
Ep 6: Mall Bathroom
A few people try to use the bathroom at the mall.
sorry someone's in this one too you
below and see probably
can just look
you look way whoa
sorry excuse me I saw your eyes I just didn't want to embarrass you by opening the door and you being in there so I just wanted to make
sure
here we go found an
empty one here you don't know how long that J crew sail is going on for
I think it's through the spring so probably end of spring maybe beginning of summer
wow six months
it's a long sail
J crew's having trouble
fellas
fellas come on let's cut the chatter here
why you want it silent over there you shy
yeah I'm a little shy and you know I've been just talking to my family all day this is
kind of where I come to take a breather
yeah bathroom's a little bit of a respite you know everybody's asking for something dad give me 20 bucks dad give me 30 bucks dad I want Sbarro
I'm like hey I want to go sit in the bathroom for 45 minutes
well y 'all can probably tell what I'm supposed to be doing by the by my boots and yeah you're
supposed to be keeping us safe in here huh
yeah let me look all the way down
look at my boots and my pants security
oh safe Santa you're safe Santa
red
guard
safety Santa safety Santa safety Santa I
forgot they were doing that this year yeah we gotta keep everything safe and also kids can ask us what they want
damn or they can ask I always wondered I appreciate
your service
yeah
thank you for your service absolutely no problem
I always wondered are you going to the bathroom more because you got little kids sitting on your bladder and on your tummy all day or is it about average do you have to prepare for that
I wouldn't think that that would be a problem but when you you plop a kid up there it's going to push something out somewhere you should get colostomy look
they're running love in town it's like trying to find masks yeah my dad's been having trouble during COVID they were all gone colostomies I well I'm going to take part of the blame for that when I heard that there might be a shortage ooh I
cleaned up on them I got a you hoarding garage colostomy bags wow wow
this all good yeah I'll bring you one
lucky
man next time when I bring my kids for a picture I'll bring you one
god I wish I had one now honestly
I would love to shit without peeing
I know
I wouldn't even have come in here I would have just you know where I'd have gone I'd have gone on the exterior landing oh my god I'd never go out there oh my god you peer over you look at the
buca di beppo god that's the place to be it's like you're in Italy and you don't have to go anywhere
I don't even need to smoke a cigarette out there shit in my pants feels good enough and it's not your
pants
no it's released well you don't want to get addicted to it you don't want to get addicted to it like cigarettes
yeah you're always having to step outside I was having to step outside to use the
colostomy
bag it's
like hey I'd love to eat here is there a room in the shitter section you don't want to do that right right
hey
you
on
your phone yeah sorry looking at some TikToks
I
don't mean to be rude but I'd like people to be present with me if we're having a conversation sorry I
know yeah
what you sneaking over there my uh is that anybody you got a channel
didn't
oh yeah I'm looking at my I'm looking at my own TikToks
oh okay so you're working a little
bit yeah well just like checking on my views got got one
that's got 13
13 hundo this morning oh whoa y 'all seen Grape
Lady huh
Grape Lady yeah the oldest viral video
time
of all
Grape Lady
Grape Lady used to be my cell phone ring my ringtone
ow
ow ow that's crazy
that's crazy
not
for
me to
crack up anytime
anybody called me I love it I currently got my favorite viral video as my ringtone yeah I do which one hold on a second I'm getting a call is it Crasby
right oh I
love that one yeah hello that's weird that we all do that
Krispy Kreme
I got I have mine
no thank you
no
thank you please honey we need you out here
place me on the do not call list thank you you can
do that with your family
yeah a lot of people don't know that
that's all you gotta do is say that
and then if they call you it is
illegal it's illegal I can sue I can sue hey y 'all got any I mean not toilet paper but like any toilet paper alternatives over there I gotta
yeah
I just gotta blow my nose
yeah yeah yeah
you want aloe or not aloe would be great I bring a full fanny pack to the mall I appreciate
that sometimes I blow my nose in this ratty stuff yeah we all have handkerchiefs cause
we're old guys at the mall
yeah but I don't want to use that
yeah you don't want to use a paper towel that's been in my back right pocket all day for a week
no I forgot mine that's why I'm
asking something well yeah that's why I bring the fanny I can't tell based on the echo are you the stall next to me how many over are you
I'm on 3R 3R
I'm
boom
battleship gotcha
yeah got em gotcha stinky one stink bomb gotcha over there I thought that was you yep yep
you guys playing the install the install video
games I forgot we were still playing I shouldn't have admitted my position
I'm so glad they installed those it's
like on a plane no one will ever accept your invite you wouldn't believe how good we've gotten at this game when I come to the mall I bring three four pairs of shoes couple pairs of pants and I'm in every stall you don't know where you're hitting me because
I'm in all wait are those fake legs over there I'm not telling you you don't know where I am they're all kind of moving a little bit you technically got me in 3R but I ain't tell you where else I
am
those that that one legs they're dressed too broad I know that ain't you
what you don't think I wear hammer pants MC hammer that's me all this J crew stuff you guys are talking is the crazy stuff
seems like you needed big pants to fit too much stuffing
alright so I told you my lie right away
listen I'm playing Battleship give me a break alright well you want to pass over the top or under the bottom
what's a better pass for you you know what I'll just come out
alright me too
I'll just come
out you do an up or down oh down okay Sam yeah
pants
thank you oh my god
there you go
that's a nice bushel oh yeah I hope it's not too many
they just met up down out there keep some for later
thank you I will this is crazy what is you
so you make them with your niche is that what you were saying yeah make TikToks with your niche up to 1350 now it
makes you in your niche it's me in my niche yeah yeah
she's funny man she's funny
yeah what is a niche
what's a niche
hmm
oh it's my brother's it's
my brother's daughter it's your brother's daughter yeah I see your sister's daughter's your niece your brother's daughter's your niche
yeah yeah yeah
I've been trying to make TikToks with my nest shoe
yeah right hey man that's too much that's too much nest shoes are
tough no I didn't
sneeze
it's tough
got an shoe I don't have one I'm trying to
get my brother to have one I need my brother to have his son
damn
so what do you and your niche make
we make you know kind of those videos that's like you know tips tips for like she's a big softball player she does that so we do kind of like
training the extra large ball
yeah yeah one of the kinds of
kickball size softball yeah yeah yeah
it's a
it's a regulation practice yeah
we do
practice ball content
I bet your niche and you have found
your niche yeah absolutely I'm searching it all
practice ball content you click that on tiktok you only get our video oh my god I'm seeing only you
I'm seeing only you guys
yeah
no overlap yet okay so three videos yeah 1350 on third video is
pretty good what's the 1350 when you got 50 views in the last minute what is it uh it's just big ball y 'all hitting it or yeah I'm just standing behind the sort of uh the net uh underhand tossing the big practice ball she's slamming it uh is it soft like and like a wiffle or or
or it's soft kind of like light or is it like a regulation softball just huge it's regulation softball with a with a lighter stuffing so that the ball is bigger but the same weight as a
regular softball those legs just floated up which one I know that ain't you
I'm in about to send a I'm in one of these
4b I knew it I
knew it I got your trawler yeah I'm looking at the comments here and it's all no wonder it's blown up thank god I've needed this for years finally practice ball content oh my god thank you so much I will be doing this with my niche soon
so much easier to hit is it okay if I do practice ball with my neshu what
is practice
ball that got into a huge argument
yeah yeah it felt like it was too close I gave him a thumbs down and then he he
fired 30 ,000 comments that says what is practice ball look
at this related video what is what is a neef what's a neef
what's that
go live respond to it I'll go live real quick I'll go live real quick I'm gonna go live let him go live hey everybody excuse
me turn it off turn it off quiet the whole time
no no it's okay we finally had one crack here we always been sitting there oh now the dams are open hey Cameron hey Tina hey hey
Michael
yeah we'll just wait for everybody to get in
here oh god oh fuck
my hole my asshole Jesus
Christ
yeah hey Stu how you doing man yeah we'll just wait for a couple more people
to
come in all right we see one of the comments
big ball yeah
yeah
what's practice ball I didn't know they could sound
off they were just like
sending those videos yeah yeah yeah
all right
sorry stop what was going on at Steak Escape out there Steak Escape I think they're changing the name oh is that what it was because it was
down they wouldn't serve me it's Steak Prison now
closed
all
oh no
they didn't want to encourage escaping anymore so it's a whole jail theme it's a whole jail
it's kind of pro prison
they got bought up by the prison industrial complex now you got to make your own well it's a bit because there was that big case hey Cliff how you doing there was that big case recently did you guys see that the guys got acquitted after they escaped prison
because they said they were inspired
by Steak
Escape
hey Monica how's your daughter
don't ask about her
what's you're building a real community that's awesome that's a real community you know Monica
yeah you're gonna have
to respond to this it's her it sure is you're ignoring the main thing you gotta comment on it
you can't pivot forever man
I can't believe she watches
that's awesome
that's awesome
that's
awesome people are on you dude they're so bad alright y 'all my surface is getting a little spotty my surface is getting a little spotty thanks everyone for joining just say what a neef is what's a neef
oh hey Phil good to see you man good to see you
yeah I'll be on later we know what a neef is we
know what a
is alright y
neef
'all breaking up see you next time practice ball question mark toilet you back down you fucking coward dang I'm worried about this
steak
prison guys I hate to say it you know I've been having such a good time in here with y 'all I'm almost done
oh man
oh man
I don't know
that's how I feel
y 'all wanna all walk out
leave them down and say hey
one last time
let's do it one last time on
three so we go on pants down hands up pants down hands up
walk out okay and no stride can be bigger than six inches yeah
I'll put you down
so
there's no chance oh
yeah no I got a size 22 waist so this I'm barely getting any
distance
yeah jealous badass 22 inches up top I got a 36 waist and a 36 shoe so you know I got problems I'm sitting up tall
all right y 'all wanna go put somebody away from life for life and share a steak out there
I'd love to yeah I just gotta fire off a text to my family let them know I'm gonna be a little while longer
tell them do not contact list
I should I should yeah
there's so few families in town though I'm gonna put my family on the I have it just
written stop all caps whenever my
wife texts me
that's a good idea I might have to try that with
everybody it's legal yeah guys I am shaking with excitement I gotta see you
all the face to face all right all right ready let's unclick the
latch on two
two
one
let's open on one
and
and now let's run out
run run
oh my god huge
whoa
practice what is
practice ball hey Monica how you doing
what are what is
it I'm on live
no that was me I've been in the stall the whole time
trying to figure
this out who's
this bill guy in the
chat hitting on Monica
what's practice
ball what's practice ball Monica I agree oh now Hillary's in the chat
bill
get out
uh
oh
gotta go
how'd they get voice access
I bring them on I bring them on kind of like when those like weird kids debate people
god you're awesome I love your content
really good stuff
yeah let's pull them up and then I'm gonna go find my family and try not to go to state jail all right
one two three
oh oh
quick two second hands under the water just for show
okay
I got close I got